Sometimes You've Just Got To Timewarp.
Nick strode into the DNA lab. It was time to check on his results. He paused as Greg held up his hand asking for quiet while he finished his phone call.
"Yeah it's going to be fun… yeah I know that… I've got to try and find time to go shopping, there's a snag in my fishnets… yeah wouldn't look quite the same… listen I've got to go, duty calls…. Ok see you soon…. Bye"
The young man looked up and smiled at Nick, the older man had a slightly bewildered expression on his face as if he were trying to figure something out "Snag in your fishnets? As in pantyhose?" he asked
"Yeah" Greg answered then realising that Nick wanted more "It's for a costume."
The Texan nodded "I figured it wasn't for daywear" the older man laughed
"Look me and a couple of college friends are going to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show at the Imperial next week, we usually go in costume." The blonde man shrugged, he'd been to see the show many times over the years, and there were always people who dressed up. It was almost an unwritten rule of being a Rocky fan.
"Aren't you worried about standing out" Nick had never been to a show where the audience dressed up before
"Nah loads of fans dress up; the theatre even has a competition for best costume sometimes."
Nick nodded slowly "So what exactly is Rocky… Horror?"
"You don't know what The Rocky Horror Picture Show is?" Greg's jaw nearly hit his desk in shock. Even people who hated the quirky cult classic knew what it was; he'd never met anyone who hadn't at least heard the title.
"Guess it never made it to Texas" Nick replied sarcastically
"Actually it was probably banned; the religious nuts think it's sacrilegious"
"So …?" the older man was intrigued now, he couldn't explain why but whenever Greg did something or told him about something he didn't understand, no matter how strange, he always wanted to get every last scrap of information about it. He'd thought once it was to do with being a CSI, the quest for truth and all that, but he had never asked Catherine about her dancing – not that she would tell him anything, it was very much a closed chapter of her life. He hadn't asked Warwick about his interest in youth football groups for the poorer neighbourhoods either and he had never really been interested in Grisom's bugs. There was just something about Greg, a certain freedom, he didn't care what people thought of him and he was always up to something crazy.
"So what?" Greg replied
"What's it about?" Nick sighed, for a smart guy Greg could be so dense sometimes.
"Oh, well you start off with this newly engaged couple, Brad Majors and Janet Weiss, they are on a trip to see their old college professor because they first met in his class and they want to tell him the news about getting engaged. The car breaks down on a dark and stormy night …."
"Really a dark and stormy night, bit cliché isn't it?" Nick laughed
"I suppose, do you want to know about this or not?" Greg gave his buddy a stern look, well as stern as he could muster at least.
"Sorry, what happens next" Nick held his hands up in mock fear
"Well they decide they have no choice but to ask for help at the mansion they passed a few moments ago – this is the Frankenstein place. They ring the bell and are greeted by Riff Raff a humble servant, he shows them in and explains that they have arrived on a rather special night; the boss is having a party. He starts performing the Time Warp, you've heard of that right? Just a jump to the left and a step to the right…"
Nick guffawed loudly as Greg went through the dances movements but shook his head as DNA technician looked at him to see if there was any recognition.
"Hmmm oh well at this point the boss, Dr Franknfurter, arrives on the scene. He is dressed a bit like a Vegas Show Girl only in black and is wearing makeup, it's a strange sight to behold and Janet screams in fright. Franknfurter gives her a strange look, after all as far as he is concerned he is normal then starts singing about being a sweet transvestite from transsexual Transylvania – a planet somewhere out in space. Brad tries to explain that they just want to use the phone and then they will leave, go back to the car and wait for the mechanic and let these people get on with their celebration. But Franknfurter invites them to stay and observe the outcome of his latest experiment and they don't have much choice so they go up to the lab…"
"Wait a minute, just hold on their bro. These guys are aliens?"
"Yeah from the planet Transylvania in the Transsexual galaxy…"
Nick held up his hand for quiet "You really like this?"
Greg nodded enthusiastically
"Ok so what's this big experiment?"
Greg grinned "Well Franknfurter has been making a man, with blonde hair and a tan and lots of muscles and he now brings him to life, this is Rocky. It becomes clear that Rocky has been made to be Franknfurter's lover – they never openly say he is gay and most fans believe he is bisexual or just as horny as hell and will sleep with anything and everything. Only Rocky doesn't seem too happy about this, not that he really has any thoughts, he can't talk and he is rather like a small child in terms of mental ability but he is clearly scared. Later after Franknfurter has had his fun with Rocky and left him chained to the 'honeymoon bed' and the lab is deserted Riff Raff sneaks in and releases the creature, scaring him so he runs away into the grounds where Riff Raff and Magenta, another servant, set the dogs on him for sport. He eventually returns to his 'birthing pod' and curls up scared and crying. Meanwhile Franknfurter has manipulated both Brad and Janet - who are both virgins and believe in marriage before sex – into sleeping with him by mimicking their voices and coming on to them. Janet exits her room, looking for brad and feeling bad about what happened between her and the good Dr and sees a handily placed video of Brad getting it on with Frank so now she is angry at him and hears Rocky crying, she comforts him and they then have sex …"
"So this movie is basically an orgy disguised as entertainment?" Nick asked
It was Greg's turn to laugh now "It's a cult classic man"
"I'm going to regret this but what happens next?"
"Frank finds out what happened and uses an electronic transducer to freeze everyone for some final show he has in mind. Then while he is performing Riff Raff and Magenta enter and inform him that he is no longer the leader of the mission, that his lifestyle is too extreme and that they will be returning to Transylvania in 30 seconds. So everyone that is not an alien runs for their lives and the whole mansion shoots off into the sky leaving Brad and Janet to try and rebuild their lives and return to normality."
"It sounds strange. Right up your path though I imagine."
Greg grinned again "I first saw it when I was 8, loved its quirkiness, and ever since I have been to the show whenever I can, dressed up, met like minded people. It's brilliant fun."
"If you say so Greg, now I came in here for results, how are you doing?" Nick decided to change the subject, he had to admit the plot had sounded interesting but it was absolutely not his thing and anyway it sounded like it was a musical and he hated musicals"
"You should come along and see it properly" Greg wasn't done on the topic just yet, even though he did reach back and grab the sheet of results that had printed while he had been talking.
"I dunno, sounds a little out of left field for me, anyway there won't be any tickets left if it's as popular as you say it is"
"I have a spare ticket; one of the guys is away on business. I was just going to give it to someone on the night but if you want it…"
"I suppose you would want me in costume if I went with you"
"Only if you wanted to be in costume, we could get you a blonde wig, you could come as Rocky. If you were really feeling brave you could wear the rest of the costume…."
"Which is?" Nick asked
Greg tapped the side of his nose, he wasn't revealing anything "It'll be fun" he added cajolingly.
Nick knew that he shouldn't trust Greg when he was being like this, if he didn't want to tell him what the rest of the costume it meant it was bad but if it showed off his muscles it probably just meant it was skin tight and he didn't have a problem with that. He wasn't sure that the show was his kind of thing, a cliché filled alien musical was not something he would normally give more than a casual glance but it did mean he would get to spend time with Greg and that was always good. "Alright I'm in." he stated, sometimes you just had to take a risk.
"Really?" Greg grinned; this was going to be fun. He couldn't wait to get Nick into the Rocky costume.
************************1 week later******************************
"Greg?" Nick hollered through the closed bedroom door
"Yeah?" came the reply
"I have serious reservations about my costume"
"Oh… What?"
"The lack of it!"
Nick heard a chuckle "I thought the whole point of being a gym bunny was to show off your body"
"I aint no gym bunny" Nick snorted
"You spend an hour there every day…"
"Gym bunnies are girls Greggo"
"Alright so you're a big strong macho man instead of a gym bunny. Don't you want to show all those lovely bulging muscles off to the girls?" the younger man teased
Nick looked again at the gold coloured speedo shorts, gold boots and blonde wig that apparently made up the Rocky costume "I dunno, when you said about the muscles I though you meant a tight t-shirt or something, not just a pair of pants and some boots"
Greg could tell that Nick was really nervous, he wasn't the sort to appear in public in a state of near undress and he wasn't a Rocky fan so he didn't know that there would be other Rocky's there with enormous beer guts that didn't care about the lack of costume. "Just wear the wig then. I said you didn't have to wear the costume if it made you uncomfortable"
"Do you mind?" Greg's opinion meant a lot to Nick, as confident as he was, tonight was Greg's thing and he didn't want to spoil it.
"Course not. Right I'm ready, wanna see?"
"Of course, I am intrigued to see what the fishnets were for"
The bathroom door opened and Greg strode out stopping a couple of feet from his stunned friend. "Well?" he asked
Nick could feel himself staring, Greg was wearing high heels that added at least 5 inches to his usual 6ft; his slender legs had been shaved smooth and were clad in fishnet stockings to a point halfway up his thigh, held in place by black suspenders. There was a small gap between the suspender belt and the black bustier above that showed off the young technicians belly in Nick thought a rather cute manner, not that he felt that way about Greg of course, they were pals, mates, brothers in crime…
Round his neck a choker of giant pearls, and on his hands a pair of silvery black, fingerless gloves. That wasn't the half of it though, Greg had made up his face using a whitish foundation and added heavy black eye shaddow across his brows, lids and lightly down the sides of his nose giving an appearance somewhere between Goth and Marilyn Manson. His lips had been painted glossy, blood red with a darker outline and he was wearing a curly but not afro wig.
The older man was speechless, dressed like that Greg could have walked past him in the street and he wouldn't have known who it was and yet somehow it suited the young Californian. "It's er …. Well it's different" he stuttered not sure what to say.
Greg laughed "I must have done it right then" he checked the make up in the den's mirror and straightened his wig a little, bending so he could see properly and accidentally showing his thin rear to his friend. "Can you help me paint the tattoo on?" he asked
"Sorry what?" Nick had been distracted by the view in front of him and hadn't heard.
"Can you paint the tattoo on for me?" Greg repeated with a slight smirk
"Oh yeah, sure. What's it look like"
Greg handed his friend a quick doodle, something he had copied off the website that had shown him how to do the make-up properly.
Every time he went to the show he tried to improve the costume a little. The first time he'd dressed up, he had stolen a pair of his mum's tights, which had been too long and wrinkled around his knees and ankles after a while and worn a friend's dark purple leotard over the top. He'd worn some red lipstick but it was he thought looking back a poor effort. Last year he'd managed to get hold of the pearl choker and stiletto heels but the makeup had still been guess work. This time round he'd found a video online detailing how to apply the makeup and had practiced a couple of times on days off in readiness so that now he reckoned he could pass for Tim Curry himself and couldn't wait for his friends to see the improvement "It goes on the top of my right arm Nick" he spoke quickly and passed his pal the face paint kit that he usually used for applying the fake tattoo. Perhaps next year he should get it done for real to show his devotion to the show, but then again….
"You know if you are going out dressed like that and don't care what people think, I suppose I can hardly be embarrassed about my outfit" Nick spoke quietly and carefully. He felt emboldened by the fact that Greg's costume was almost as revealing as his own and he could at least hide his outfit under a coat until they reached the theatre.
The doorbell rang at that moment and Greg smiled before heading to the door to let his guest in.
"Greggy!" a young woman dressed in a tight sequined costume of every colour under the sun wrapped her arms around Greg and made a kissing noise next to his cheek, she didn't want to ruin the makeup. It looked fab this year.
"Hey Vorny. Like the hair colour" the junior criminalist gushed
The young woman touched the very short, orange red style "I don't have to work for two days so I have plenty of time to wash it out"
"Vorny this is Nick, from the office, I'm trying to convince him to go as Rocky" Greg quickly pulled his friend over and introduced her to the nervous Texan
"Nice to meet you Nick. I'm actually Siobhan but everyone calls me Vorny. Are you a Rocky fan?" the young woman bubbled happily. She had, Nick thought, a very pretty smile.
"Not exactly. I've never actually seen it; Greg told me about it and convinced me to come along tonight"
"Oh so you're a Rocky virgin. Well you'll have a great time trust me, Greg introduced me to it 4 years ago and I absolutely fell in love with it, the songs are really catchy you know."
"Well I can't say I usually go for musicals but it's hard to say no to that face" Nick smiled, feeling himself relax a little. "Forgive me, which character are you?"
"I am Columbia, a kind of groupie hanging out at the Frankenstein Place."
"Ok, I don't think Greg mentioned that character when he explained the plot"
"No, I don't really have much to do with the storyline.
The doorbell rang again and Greg showed in a couple of guys who Nick soon learned were Dan and Si dressed as Riff Raff and Eddie respectively. As yet he had not changed into costume; he was still trying to decide if he was brave enough to be seen in Vegas in only a pair of small briefs.
"Lilly and Garrett are meeting us at the theatre so decision time Nick" Greg joined the small group who were stood round chatting about their careers and the characters they were dressed as.
"Go on Nick" Vorny said encouragingly
"Yeah, you won't look out of place with the rest of us round you" Dave grinned slyly, the long blonde wig with its bald top giving him a slightly sinister look.
"Oh what the hell" Nick shrugged and quickly retreated into Greg's bedroom to change as the gathered group cheered at his decision.
Finally it was time to leave, and everyone slipped their outdoor coats on. It wasn't to hide their appearance that they did this, night time in Vegas could be 20 degrees cooler and none of the group was exactly over dressed.
They arrived at the theatre in Dave's old banger, the same model, he boasted, as Brad had in the film; not that the car had ever been mentioned and handed their coats into the reception. Nick couldn't help but blush when the attendant winked at him and scribbled a phone number across his ticket.
"Mom can we get hotdogs?" a young girl's voice carried across the auditorium to the group.
"I suppose so" the mother's voice carried as well sending a shiver down Nick's spine. Please don't let her notice he thought, turning away from the kiosk.
"Nick? Is that you?" he turned round slowly and smiled at Catherine Willows who stood in front of him with an odd expression on her face.
"Hi Cath" he could feel himself blushing again
The strawberry blonde cleared her throat "Nice costume"
"Er…. Thanks" Nick didn't know what to say, he'd been so sure that he wouldn't meet anyone he knew, that wearing the revealing costume hadn't seemed so bad. No-one at the office, apart from Greg, would know about it and Greg could be persuaded to keep a secret.
"I didn't expect to see you here, especially dressed so … informally. Are you a fan?" Catherine was having a hard time keeping her eyes from wandering, Nick had a good figure and unlike some of the other 'freaks' that had dressed up he actually looked the part
"No. Greg convinced me to come along with him and his mates. They were dressing up and he convinced me to join in"
"Greg's here too?" Catherine twisted round trying to see her other friend
"Boo!" she swivelled on her heels instantly at the sound by her left ear "Hi Catherine" Greg grinned.
"Wow…. Er … nice outfit Greg" Catherine felt speechless, she knew the young DNA tech could be slightly eccentric and that he liked to dress up but this wasn't like wearing a spangley head dress and dancing in the CSI corridors pretending to be a show girl.
Greg laughed loudly; it made a change to see Catherine looking uncomfortable. "I didn't have you pegged as a Rocky fan" he continued
"No, well I am not, some of Lindsey's friends were going and she didn't want to be left out so I agreed to take her. Seeing your costume I'm not so sure I should let her see the show." Catherine felt genuinely worried, her daughter had told her that it was a popular musical and that it had its own special dance and that she would be the laughing stock of the school if she didn't let her see it so she had reluctantly agreed.
"I wouldn't get too worried. I first saw the show when I was 8, it's a great laugh. Hope you're going to get up and join in the time warp"
"Get up and join in?"
"Yeah. Because it's like a cult show, 90% of the audience knows the dance moves so as soon as that music starts there is a rumble as the fans all get to their feet and join in. The cast encourage it. It's what makes it such a fun evening.
"And the costumes?"
"Again a cult thing and the theatre has a competition for best dressed fan."
At that point Lindsey ran over clutching her hotdog and stopped staring at Greg and Nick, the latter attempting to hide behind his buddy for humility"
"Cool costume Greg!" the 12 year old grinned.
"Thanks Linz. Looking forward to the show?"
"You bet."
"Do you know how to Time Warp?"
"I think so"
"It's just a jump to the left…." Greg started the well know song and beckoned the little girl to join in.
"And then a step to the right?" Lindsey was a little unsure of the words but Greg smiled at her and encouraged her to copy him
"Put your hands on your hips…"
"You bring your knees in tiiiiiiight"
"Well it's the pelvic thrust, that really drives you insaaaaane"
Suddenly the foyer was filled with sound as nearby fans realised what was going on and all joined in the chorus
"Let's do the time warp again, let's do the time warp again, let's do the time warp again"
Lindsey giggled and even Catherine managed a smile. At least she could be sure of a good time.
Just as Greg had predicted when the familiar music of the time warp began to play the theatre auditorium rumbled into life as fans young and old stood up ready.
Between them Greg and Vorny hauled Nick out of his seat where he had been trying to hide his lack of clothing for most of the evening and encouraged him to join in somewhat clumsily with the dance moves. Most of the fans were also singing along so that the large space rang with sound.
By the time the show had ended Nick had forgotten about being embarrassed, he'd had a great time and was grinning from ear to ear.
"Ladies and Gentlemen" the stage version of Columbia stepped forwards and commanded the audience's attention. "It is time to announce the winners of the Rocky Horror look-a-like competition!"
A cheer erupted from both the costumed and un-costumed fans.
"The lucky winners this year will receive this fantastic bottle of babycham" the actress continued, as frank stepped forward with a large bottle of the fermented pear beverage held aloft.
"So you think you're gonna win Greggo?" Nick whispered in his friend's ear
"I think we have a good chance. Not many groups can boast a Rocky with real muscles" the younger man returned gently stroking his friend's chest in a very franknfurter fashion before realising himself and pulling back to his seat.
"The winners tonight are the Rockyrocks comprising Greg Sanders, Siobhan Meadows, Garret Jones, Lilly Smith, Dave Cooper, Si Lanthanum and Nick Stokes. Come on up and claim your prize guys!"
Siobhan screamed "We won" and just about bounced out of her seat in excitement. The other guys looked incredulous; they couldn't believe they had actually won the competition. The lights swung out into the audience as the group stood and made their way towards the stage guided by ushers and the thunderous applause of the many fans. Greg kept a tight hold of Nicks hand the whole way afraid that the young Texan would bolt at any second, his first time out to see Rocky and suddenly he was being thrust on stage to receive an award for best costume.
Nick felt sick, he didn't like being the centre of attention, he liked working in the background, his own conscience the only reward he needed.
"Don't they look great guys?" the on-stage Columbia spread her arms indicating the range of wonderful costumes that Greg and his friends were wearing and the audience clapped so loudly that Greg thought he might be deafened by the end of the evening but as silence descended once more the microphone was thrust into the DNA techs hand and the actress acting as announcer continued in a mini interview "So you must all be huge fans of the show"
Greg cleared his throat "Yeah we all love the show, but tonight there is a new member of our group. Nick Stokes is a Rocky virgin and agreed to come along tonight as Rocky Horror himself"
Nick rolled his eyes; he was going to kill Greg later.
The actress pounced on the information as Greg had hoped she would "So Nick, you've never been to a show before"
With a wobble in his voice Nick took the mic in a shaky hand "No mam. I've never seen the film or the show before tonight"
A collective gasp erupted round the audience "So how do you like us?"
"Well I don't think I will ever be as big a fan as my mate Greggo here" he grabbed hold of Greg's arm partly to single him out and partly for support "but I'd like to come again and stay but for now I'm going home" feeling more confident Nick bravely made an attempt at remembering one of the lines from the final song.
"Fantastic! Give them some applause" the theatre erupted once again and Nick could pick Catherine out of the audience clapping loudly with a huge grin on her face, she was probably already thinking of ways to get this little piece of gossip round the lab.
"Here is your prize. Now we have one last request. Will you join us in the Time Warp?"
"We will" Greg shouted out.
"Brilliant"
Stage Columbia carefully positioned the group's members round the stage next to their counterparts and then the music began once again.
It's astounding, time is fleeting, madness takes its toll…