Hey guys! This is my first story ever, i hope you like it! Please read it, and review it! Also, i do not own anything of Twilight, Stephanie Meyer always will, thanks !!
I'm sitting in math class, staring out the square window. I sighed, and my heart feels like it's not there, like it's broken. That's probably because it is. It is gone, and it is broken. Just thinking about him makes my cheeks boil, causing me much discomfort while I'm sitting here, and when I'm supposed to be doing my math quiz. But lately, I haven't been able to concentrate. I don't think I can even function properly without him here.
He has been in every single class of mine since the sixth grade. We never really even noticed each other until eighth grade. Well that's not true. I didn't realize he existed until the eighth grade. He, on the other hand, still hasn't noticed me, and we are both now juniors in high school. But I don't blame him for not noticing me because no one ever does. I'm just plain, old, boring me.
Me, as in Kim. Kim Connweller. I have lived in La Push my whole life, and I doubt I will ever come back here as soon as I'm in college. I live with my mom and dad, and my favorite person in the whole world, besides Him of course, John, is far away at college. John is my older brother, and he left me here to rot two years ago. He still calls every so often, but I miss him like crazy. Not as much as Him, but enough to make me go a little more psycho each day.
And now we come to the question in all of your heads, who is this He? He is only the most beautiful, funniest, and most kind person you will ever meet. Everything about him is perfect, from his body, all the way to the finest details of his eyes. And yes, I would know this because I like him, a lot. On certain occasions I have begun to think that I love him, and the more I tell myself this, the more I believe it will happen. It being me and him, him and me. Jared Nahl. Even thinking about him made my stomach flutter.
I look down to my math quiz, and the only thing written on the page is a heart with K.C.+J.N. inside it. I thought of how our names sounded so perfect together. But that's just me, crazy and love struck Kim. Pathetic. I hear the voice in the back of my mind say, so I clear my mind and try to focus on finishing this test. You can't do this anymore, it's not healthy. You don't think I know that? I try every single day to get over this stupid and unhealthy obsession, but I've grown to need it, need him, just almost as much as my lungs require air in order for me to breathe. Just don't do this now, think about it later. I tell myself, and shake my head to focus on math.
As I walk to my locker, looking down at the floor the whole way, I notice a pair of feet standing in front of my locker. My heartbeat starts to pick up, but then I notice the old, worn down shoes as my best friends. Correction, my only friend. I look up at her, and attempt a smile. She glares at me because she knows me too well to believe the fake smile.
"Kim, I swear to God, you NEED to get over him!" She grabs both of my shoulders and shakes my body, and of course, all of my books fall out of my hands, all thanks to her.
As I'm picking up my books, I say, "Trust me Sarah, I've tried. I can't. Especially now 'cause he's been gone for almost two weeks. I sit at home thinking to myself that today is going to be the day that I get over him, and become me. But then I come to school and see that he's not here, and my heart sinks back into the state it was in the day before." I sigh the same heartbroken sigh, and move towards my locker to put my books away. As soon as they're all in there I slam it shut, blowing the wind into Sarah's face. This makes me frown because she is probably the prettiest girl in the entire school. She is one of the few caucasian girls that the Council allowed to come to school on the Rez. She had long, blonde hair and big blue eyes. But she was more shy than me when it came to people, so on her first day here, after two periods, word had gotten around to the school that she was boring, so no one tried. No one, except me.
"Really, Kim? Whatever, I have to go home and babysit Matthew, so just call me later, kay?" She didn't even wait for my response 'cause she knew I had nothing better to do but than to call her later that night. I started to walk towards my beat-up car, when someone stuck their foot out and tripped me. I landed on my hands and knees, scraping every possible surface on them that's possible. I looked up to see who had done it this time, and to no surprise, it was Paul.
Let's just say Paul and I weren't the best of friends. Honestly, we were the furthest thing from friends. He hated me it seemed, but I have no idea why because the only thing I have ever said to him was "Yes" when he asked last year in history to borrow a pencil. I guess that's what I get when I'm a nobody. People just pick on you because they think nothing of you, and that you will feel nothing or say nothing back to them. Which, in my case, is always true. I've learned from past experiences to just ignore all of the jerks in my school.
But as I picked up my purse and walked away from Paul, I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be part of the "popular" crowd. Jared was part of it. But that's not the only reason I thought of this, although it is the biggest reason. What if, instead of being shy and quiet Kim, I was a more confident and prettier Kim? Maybe a Kim that Jared would like, or even love me like I loved him. And as I knew they would, the tears rolled down my cheeks as I was pretty much running away from Paul, away from my school, away from the life that I wish I could change.