"You look like shit." Thanos commented as he stared across the table at his dozing teammate. It's been a few months since they had joined the guild. The bandage on Thanos jaw had long since disappeared, revealing a fresh pink scar but otherwise nothing else had changed.
"You look like an ass." Jarvis groaned, voice muffled by the fact that his face was buried in his crossed arms. No nothing had changed, including their near constant bickering and cattiness.
"Sarge is going to be so pissed. You realize we have work today right?" Thanos scolded. When Jarvis didn't answer he gave the table a harsh shake, forcing Jarvis to lift his head with a nettled cry of pain.
"Yes I know!" He yelled back, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes in an attempt to abate his throbbing headache. "Just…let me nap for a minute. Then I'll be good to go."
"You won't be good for hours." Thanos continued as he leaned back in his chair and propped a foot on the edge of the table. "In fact you might never be good. Maybe you'll just suck forever." Jarvis glared at Thanos as he gave the table a hard shove. The action pushed Thanos' chair off balance enough to send him toppling over with a cry of surprise.
The door to the locker room opened just as Thanos was hitting the ground. Margot stared down at Thanos with an unimpressed expression. Next she looked to Jarvis and sighed sharply when she saw the telltale fatigue and general unwellness written all over his face and posture.
"I'm going to skip the lecture today as the job is easy enough for a child to accomplish." She deadpanned as she stepped over Thanos' prone body and positioned herself at the head of the table. She didn't bother sitting as the briefing was simple and quick.
"We'll be going to Tria Village today boys. Seems they have a bit of a bee infestation and we've been called to handle it."
"Bees?" Thanos questioned wearily as he picked himself up off the floor and sat back down in his chair. "Seems kind of like a waste of man power. What can't the dumb country folk handle it themselves." Jarvis made an indignant noise at the comment but nether of his higher ups seemed to question what it was for.
"If they were normal bees it wouldn't be a problem. But these are giant bees, think of a normal bee, but the size of a house cat and armed with a stinger the size of my sword."
"Oh, I wasn't aware you were a flying insect Sarge." Margot stared at Thanos' smirking face with an impassive expression. Suddenly without warning, Margot unsheathed her sword and whipped Thanos across the face with the triangular blade. Since it was a stabbing weapon, it didn't cut particularly deep, but it still left an impressive cut across the boys right cheek.
"One should tread lightly when dealing with such insects." She scolded, sneering as she re-sheathed her weapon. Thanos grunted in discomfort as he tried to quell the bleeding with his hand. Jarvis laughed at his teammates predicament but quickly silenced with a flinch when Margot glared at him. She looked back to Thanos and prompted, "Hurry up and get Bruce to cover that, we're heading out in fifteen minutes whether you're ready or not."
The problem was immediately apparent the moment they walked into the village. Sleek cat sized yellow and black insects flew about the place, crawling on the sides of buildings and pestering the village folk as they tried to go about their day. The boys both observed the flying critters as their Sergeant spoke with the village elder. Thanos looked on with mild disgust as one flew by while Jarvis hardly took notice and yawned widely.
"Ugh, they're kinda gross huh."
"Hmm? What are you afraid of bugs or something Thanos." Jarvis teased, elated by the new information he could use to annoy his comrade with.
"Normal bugs no. But these are huge. How does that not bother you?!"
"There's a lot of giant ants where I'm from. They cause some trouble from time to time, but it's nothing we couldn't handle on our own." Jarvis explained.
"These aren't ants though. They fly. And sting!" Jarvis rolled his eyes at Thanos' whining.
"A bugs a bug." He snatched up a bee that had landed on his upper leg by the thorax and shoved it into Thanos' face just close enough so that it couldn't reach him with it's long stinger. Thanos flinched back regardless and glared at Jarvis as he continued, "You city people are so helpless. I bet you I can kill more of these than you can."
"You're on!"
Jarvis crushed the insects thorax in his fist, it's amber colored fluids dripping down his gauntlets. "There's one." He pulled the stinger from the dying Anthophila, silently signifying their use as counters, and discarding the still twitching body. Without prompting, Thanos drew his sword and took off into the village, followed closely behind by Jarvis.
Margot paused in her discussion with the elder to stare in mild surprise as Thanos ran past. She managed to grab on to Jarvis as he passed by.
"Stand down Jarvis! You're not leaving my sight today." She ordered, digging her heels into the dirt path and pulling on his back plate with all her strength. Jarvis still managed to drag her a full foot before he realized she was there and stopping to give her a pleading look.
"What!? But boss we…"
"When ever you run off you get into some kind of trouble. I'm not cleaning up after you anymore." She scolded. In the distance Thanos picked off 3 giant bees and turned to the pair to flip Jarvis off. Jarvis clenched his fists and growled in frustration. "Pout all you want, you're staying with in eye sight of me at all times." Jarvis immediately deflated.
Jarvis struggled to keep up with Margot's kill count. The woman was faster and far more precise then he currently was and her light thrusting weapon was better able to handle the task than his larger Fathmil. She easily picked the pests out of the air like one would spear meat on a kebab. Though easily the physically strongest of the group, it rarely seemed to benefit him as often as his other two comrades speed did them. He heaved a dispirited sigh when he saw Thanos off in the distance, harvesting stingers from the mass of insects he had dealt with. Unless he could get away from Margot, he wasn't going to be winning his own bet by a long shot.
Luck struck in the form of an old mans cries. Not even ten feet away, an old farmer had disturbed a small gathering of bees and they currently were swarming him, forcing him to duck and dodge as fast as his old joints would allow. Margot ran off with out a moments hesitation to help. Jarvis almost did as well but paused when he realized the woman's attention was solely on the danger surrounding the old man. He clenched his hands tighter around the hilt of his sword uncertainly, feeling bad over the thought of running off when someone was in trouble. But he supposed Margot could easily handle the situation, so it wasn't like he was really abandoning someone in need. Plus he couldn't let Thanos win, not after his earlier taunting. With a mischievousness smirk, Jarvis ran off to a more densely infested section of the village. Nether Margot or Thanos noticed his running off.
Suddenly killing the pests became infinitely easier. With long swipes of his sword, he mowed down dozens of the critters before they even had a chance to retaliate. In under thirty minutes he had a small section of town cleared of the vermin and had harvested a sizable amount trophies. Surely if he kept picking off crowded areas like this while his team was none the wiser he would have enough to win the bet.
Furthermore he would prove to Margot that he wasn't a disaster magnet whenever he was left to his own devices. This would be his shining moment! He'd have Thanos groveling at his feet. Margot would make him Corporal instead. Yes things would start to look up from here.
He was pulled from his over the top ideations by a loud buzzing. He blinked as a bee flew past his head and towards the edge of town. Jarvis frowned at having missed one and stored his battle loot in the supply pouch at his waist.
"Come back here!" He demanded, albeit a little over dramatically. "You cannot escape your reckoning!" He took up his sword again and charged after the oblivious insect. Once close enough, he tried to swing at it but missed, propelling the creature higher into the air with the wind his swipe created. He growled in frustration but continued on, following the bee until it lead him to a small outcropping of trees between Tria and Solieu. Finally, the bee came to a rest on the side of a tree and with a hard swing and a crunching splat, the bee fell to the ground in two pieces.
"Ha! Another foe slain by the great Jarvis!" Jarvis cried in victory, laughing gleefully at his own exuberance. He gave a quick flourish of his weapon in celebration and finished with a thrust into the air above him. A loud crunch rang through the air and when he tried to pull his weapon back down he found it to be stuck fast in something. Jarvis turned his head this way and that, trying to see through the foliage at what he was stuck on. A thick amber colored substance dripped down the length of his blade and small droplets landed on his face and arms, further confusing him.
He gave another hard tug and his sword came free from whatever it had been caught on. He stumbled forward when he felt an unexpected weight at the end of his sword. He stared at the mass with curious confusion and easily identified it as a large chunk of what appeared to be a part of a hive.
A low thunderous hum filled the air. It didn't take long for the pieces to click onto place and the young warriors face paled as he slowly looked up.
"Shit…"
Margot had long since zoned out as she focused on spearing bees with her needle like blade. The old man had only served to demand her full attention for a few moments, then it was back to the repetitive task of extermination while dodging the occasional attacker. With a practiced flick, she cleared her blade of any remaining insects and viscera. She spotted Thanos as he came around the side of a building, shaking bug juices from his weapon with a bored expression. She couldn't blame them for their boredom, it was the only none high profile job available at the time. It was a cake walk even for her two idiots. Even Jarvis had been quiet for the entirety of the ordeal.
"Are we done yet?" Thanos complained, burying his free hand in his pocket and leaning against his sword. Margot narrowed her eyes at the boy. Though boredom was understandable this time, Thanos' over all lack of enthusiasm for everything was a recurring problem. He may have been the better fighter of the two, but Jarvis was at least enthusiastic and able to follow orders with minimal trouble.
"No, we still have to find the nest and get rid of it. After that the villagers should be able to handle whatever is left over on their own."
Thanos scoffed and rolled his eyes, obviously wanting to be done with the job and paid.
"Try not to get to excited. As for you Jarvis, you've done well so far, maybe there's hope…" she looked around but was unable to find her purple haired subordinate anywhere. So much for him following orders. "Great, now where's he gone off to?"
"Knowing him, he's probably gotten up to something ridiculous." Thanos answered, unable to keep the smug grin off his face.
As if on cue, the sound of screaming and frantic foot falls grew steadily louder from down the village path. Both Sergeant and Corporal looked to the source, catching sight of Jarvis as he was running towards them.
"Jarvis! What have you done this time" Margot demanded, already preparing herself for the task of cleaning up after her trouble magnet.
"BEES!" Jarvis shouted as he ran right past. Margot watched him go in surprise, dreading what could be so bad that it would have Jarvis hauling so fast across town.
"Oh, hey there's that ridiculous thing he got into." Thanos said, prompting Margot to turn back to the direction Jarvis had come from. A thick cloud of angry giant bees was speeding toward them.
"Sooo…What are we going to..," Thanos turned to where Margot had been, only to find her gone. He flinched and gawked comically at the suddenness of her departure.
"Run you idiot!" She yelled from down the path, having run off in the direction Jarvis had gone. Thanos took off after her with little hesitation.
"Never would have taken you for someone who runs away." Thanos teased when he finally caught up to the small woman.
"I'm not…It's a tactical…retreat." Margot huffed, causing Thanos to raise an eye brow at her sudden fatigue. With how much she had them running laps, he would have figured her to be in better shape. He didn't have time to ask what was wrong though, as the two hit a dead end at the shore of a small lake. Thanos looked frantically for anywhere to run or hide, but his attention was drawn back to Margot when she grabbed him by the arm and hauled him toward a turned over row boat.
They took refuge under the capsized vessel, huffing and gasping for breath while the buzzing outside vibrated the air withing the confined space. Inside the boat was pitch black but Thanos soon remedied it by producing a zippo lighter and igniting it. Immediately Jarvis tired and sickly expression came into view causing Thanos to let out a startled yell and drop his lighter.
"Dear Etherea and Celesta, don't yell like that. Ugh my head." Jarvis' groaning cut through the dark.
"Are you seriously still hungover?" Thanos hissed as he scrambled to find his lighter and reignite it. Jarvis flinched from the sudden light in his face.
"Yes, I mean no! It was the running. So much running…I think I'm gonna be sick." Jarvis whines with a queasy look.
"Don't you dare throw up in here!" Thanos pressed himself as hard as he could against the side of the boat as Jarvis hiccuped and gagged into his closed fist.
"Hey…" Jarvis swallowed down the bile in his throat and pushed Thanos' lighter hand in the direction of their leader. "Margot, are you okay?" Margot sat slumped against the side of the boat, hand pressed tight against her chest and fingertips digging into the studded leather of her armor. Her pained expression was suddenly pale and she still breathed as if she had just finished running a marathon. She looked up and tried to give her sharpest glare when she realized the boys were staring at her with concern.
"Don't just sit there…think of something to..to get us out of here…idiots." She wheezed. Uncertain looks passed between both boys. They didn't have time to continue pressing Margot as to what was wrong; however, as a long pointed stinger came crashing through the wood not even four inches from her head. Shock briefly crossed the woman's face before she shook it off and steeled herself again.
"Thanos, now's a good lesson in leadership." She began, now starting to regain her breath. "As corporal you'll need to take over command if I should ever fall. Consider your options and decide what we should do." slowly all hints of pain eased from her face despite her hand never leaving her chest.
"Is now really the time?!" Thanos panicked. He hadn't been expecting to actually ever be put on the spot like this.
"The best experience is real experience. Hypotheticals won't do you any good if you've never been in a life or death situation."
"Life or death?" Thanos paled at the implication that their lives were now in his hands.
"You mean we're gonna die?" Jarvis wasn't helping matters.
"Thanos think!"
"Uh! The lake?"
"The lake?" Jarvis parroted with a confused look.
"Yeah, It's just a few feet away. We can push the boat towards it and slip under when the water gets deep enough. Then we'll swim to safety." Thanos explained as he cut the light and threw his shoulder into the side of the boat closest to the water.
"Do you seriously think I can swim with plate armor on!?"
"You're free to try your luck out there." Margot interrupted, moving to press her smaller body into the boat along with Thanos. The vessel moved a few feet, forcing Jarvis to crawl with it as he huffed a resigned sigh.
"Relax we only need to be deep enough to be submerged. We can easily crawl along the bottom at a few feet deep." Thanos said, "Now shut up and help."
"Aye aye, boss." Jarvis spat the last word out with no small amount of piss and vinegar. He threw himself with all his might at the side of the boat, forcing it farther than the other two had. With one more shove from all three of them they were in the water. From there, pushing it out deeper was much easier and once they were able, slipped underneath the vessel to make their escape.
A quick swimming crawl lead them to a stretch of shore line several yards from the danger. The bees continued to buzz around the capsized boat, oblivious to their preys escape.
"Alright, good job this time Thanos." Margot complimented, seemingly having regained her composure again. "Now Jarvis, judging by the number of bees it looks like you came across the hive. Do you remember where it is?"
"Alright, any ideas on how to get rid of this boys." Margot prompted as she studied the dense foliage above her. It was hard to make out the side of the hive, but she could assume it spanned the branches of several of the nearby trees. I would not be easy to get rid of without further angering the insects.
"We could burn it." Jarvis put forth as he found his discarded sword laying on the ground nearby. The honeycomb was still stuck to it and he worked to pull it off while Thanos thought over his suggestion.
"If we burn it it'll cause a huge uncontrollable fire." He reasoned.
"Then we cut it down and burn it."
"That'll just piss them off again."
"Then burn down the whole place!" Jarvis pulled the honeycomb free and safely set it aside in a nearby tree before wiping his sticky gauntlets on the exposed section of damp pants around his hips. "Listen, I don't see you thinking of anything better."
"Why are you so insistent on setting things on fire all of a sudden?"
"Because he's not wrong." Margot answered before an argument could break out. She pointed and traced the outline of the hive to the two young men, showing just how massive it was. "At this point it's gotten too large to remove physically. Burning it is the most effective way and will get rid of the queen as well, ensuring the rest die off eventually."
"Do you think they'll be happy to lose this little wooded area?" Thanos questioned, still unsure.
"Probably not," Margot shrugged and shook her head, "they don't have a lot of options though. If they had called us sooner this would have been easier."
"What if we just build a fire underneath it?" Jarvis suggested, "we can cut it down and let it land in the fire. Maybe that'll lessen the damage?" He was unsure if the idea was even worth the effort. He breathed a sigh of relief when Margot nodded in agreement.
"It's the best option. Thanos, go back to the village for some axes and buckets of water. Jarvis, help me build a fire."
Margot and Jarvis busied themselves with clearing out smaller branches and foliage from around the hive. The process supplied them with fodder for their fire but also allowed them better visibility of the papery oblong shaped structure. On Thanos' side, he had been able to secure several axes and the requested water. Now it was only a matter of chopping down the larger branches.
Thanos and Margot easily took care of the lower branches while Jarvis used his larger sword to hack off the higher ones. Thankfully the fire provided a bonus by filling the large hive with smoke, forcing what ever bees that remained to focus on cooling and ventilating their soon to be destroyed home. Eventually, they came down to just two large branches on ether side of the structure.
"Alright, this could fall at any second. Let's hurry up and cut them both at the same time so we don't risk it rolling off the fire." Margot ordered as her boys got into their places on ether side. "Be sure to move out fast, this thing will go up in flames fast." Both nodded in understanding. With Thanos' axe and Jarvis' sword, they took aim and reeled back to make the final swings that would complete their job. At the last minute, a bee landed innocently on Thanos' shoulder, startling him and forcing him to miss as he tried to shake the monstrous insect off. Jarvis landed spot on, cleaving though the branch easily and sending the whole thing swinging downward. The branch on the other side snapped under the weight, knocking Thanos to the ground as it fell past him. Thankfully he managed to avoid being pinned under the large hive as it crashed down.
Jarvis paused just as he was about to back away, noticing his teammate on the ground and reaching out to him as if intending to run over and help. The hive went up in flames almost immediately, forcing tongues of fire to flare outward and engulf the two young mercenaries.
Margot watched in stunned shock, eyes wide and mouth hanging open from the warning she didn't have time to let out. With out further hesitation, she grabbed one of the buckets and rushed forward as a figure came crawling out of the blaze. After dousing the flames, she found Thanos, on his hands and knees, looking singed and traumatized by the ordeal but otherwise unscathed.
"Where's Jarvis." Margot said as she ran for the other bucket.
"I'm here! I'm fine!" She turned around, ready to douse him as well. She froze, face dumbfounded and hair falling out of its neatly slicked back place when she saw the scene before her. Thanos sat on the ground, looking horrified at the sight of their third member up in flames and…completely unbothered by it.
"What?" He questioned, looking back and forth between Margot and Thanos. With a tired sigh and a roll of her eyes, Margot tossed the contents of the other bucket onto Jarvis.
"Aaawww! I just dried off!"
"I never wanna see another bee…again!" Thanos moaned, arms wrapped around himself as he shivered from a combination of the cool evening air hitting his damp clothing and the pain caused by a few second degree burns. They had just finished controlling the fire that destroyed the hive, allowing the structure to burn to ashes before starting to head home. Thankfully there had been relatively little damage to the wooded area so in the end they had come out with the best case scenario.
"So who takes credit for all the bees that died in the fire?" Jarvis asked, ignoring Thanos' misery and bringing them back to their competition.
"I don't even care about that anymore!" Thanos yelled as he turned to glare at Jarvis. His gaze shifted downward to the large chunk of beehive he had pulled of of his sword earlier. "What are you even doing with that?!"
"Eating it." Jarvis replied simply, taking a bite of the sticky, dripping bee's wax to emphasize his point. He hummed happily as the floral sweetness chased away the last dregs of his hangover.
"I'm getting diabetes from just watching you."
"I agree, how can you stomach that?" Margot asked, once again straightened out and providing a contrast against the boys singed and sopping wet appearances.
"A woman in my village kept bees, so I used to eat them all the time. My mom would also make these really amazing honey rolls to. I haven't had them in so long." Margot watched the unexpected shifts in demeanor from both of her subordinates. Jarvis suddenly went from happily reminiscent to melancholic while Thanos' face scrunched up with sudden annoyance and what appeared to be jealousy.
"If you miss your hic town so much then why don't you just leave." Thanos snapped unexpectedly and continued in a harsh murmur. "We'd all probably be better off with you growing potatoes or whatever anyway."
Jarvis fixed him with a sharp glare and looked ready to argue back. Instead he simply closed his mouth and stared back down at the sweet mass in his hands with a pained expression.
Margot narrowed her eyes and stopped their progress just as they were entering Solieu Village. Both boys stopped but refused to look at each other or their boss. The sight was childish to say the least.
"I want both of you spending more time together outside of work." She announced, drawing both of their attention finally. "You bicker and condescend each other constantly. This isn't how you form a bond as a team and if you don't bond you can't ever reliably work together."
"You're joking right?! What am I supposed to do, go to the bar with him and try to out chug a gallon of beer against him?" Thanos spat, continuing with a snide humorless laugh. "Maybe we can even hold each others hair back as we puke in some dirty back ally all night."
"You can drop acid and play the most interesting game of strip poker with him for all I care. Find something to bond over or you can just take your ass back out onto the streets and find another job." Margot seethed, getting so far into Thanos' face that he had no choice but to step back in order to see her. He stared down at the smaller woman with a defiant look. Eventually though his resolve crumbled under her intense stare and he conceded with a begrudging agreement.
"Are you clear on that as well J…" She paused when she saw Jarvis was once again gone.
"He's over there." Margot slowly turned her head to find her wayward boy kneeling in front of two children; one girl and a toddler boy, and talking to them. The two children munched happily on chunks of honeycomb, no doubt given to them by the man. She began to storm over but paused when she over heard the conversation.
"Thanks again sir for taking care of the bee problem. I was so nervous they'd come here to." The brunette girl said, sounding genuinely grateful and relieved.
"Yea, yea, tanks for get, getting da bweez." The brunette toddler added, already bouncing from the sugary treat. Jarvis smiled with genuine elation at the pair.
"It wasn't a problem at all. A cake walk for the great Jarvis!" He boasted, placing a hand on his chest as he referred to himself. The action left a sticky honey handprint on the steel of his breastplate that he tried to ignore. In the background Margot and Thanos both rolled their eyes at his overconfidence.
"I sthaw you wunning away dow." The boy pointed out, giggling when the man looked stricken, as if the words had physically harmed him.
"Tha…That was just a tactical retreat! Sometimes you have to take a step back, rework your plans." Jarvis' temper was obviously beginning to spike but he did his best effort to swallow it down so as not to upset the children.
"Oh, you took a wot of stepths then. Also you were sweaming."
"Jack! Were you out by the woods again!? Mom told you to stay away from there." The girl scolded, seemingly taking no notice of how Jarvis' face heated with embarrassed anger.
"That's also not how you treat people who help you!" Jarvis snapped, causing the girl to jump but making the boy laugh more.
"Wow, you just got burned by a small child." Thanos snickered as he grabbed Jarvis by the upper arm and hauled him to his feet. Even Margot had a twitch of amusement pulling at the corner of her mouth.
"Hey let go!" Jarvis cried as he struggled to pull himself from Thanos' grasp. In the end he resorted to yelling back over his shoulder as he was lead away. "This isn't over kid! Wait till you get older! I'll teach you some manners then!" The boy only laughed and clapped his hands while his sister stood there, hands clasped over her mouth and embarrassment written all over her face.