Notes

Spoiler for Chapter 83

WHY ISAYAMA WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY

It is hard to breath.

He can feel the blood sticking on his clothes, the wounds on his body. But he can't feel anything. All he has is a promise to one man who changes his world. The man who becomes the world for him.

The man that he lost—that he can't save.

While the hope for humanity is still bright, but the hope for his own life is scarce. Dripping from the wounds like the reality that—that Erwin is dead.

It's almost an out-of-body experience, he turns to see Eren kneeling before Armin's body while Mikasa—an Ackerman like him—is trying hard not to cry as she stared at the remain of her best friend. Levi feels the lump in his throat. His best friends, and so many comrades of his are dead. And now, it's Erwin... Levi feels more alone than he's ever been.

Because even when he lost everything back then, he still had Erwin. The one strength beside him, the one who stood before the soldiers with such hopes for humanity. Levi himself, doesn't have much hope in the first place. Because Erwin was—is his hope.

Now that hope died along with his heart.

"ARMIN JUST BREATHED!" Eren yells reached his ears. "Sergeant, the injection!" He looks up to Levi. "Turn Armin into a titan, and let him eat Bertholdt!"

Armin is alive. The boy who's as good as a planner as Erwin as. Humanity's hope may live. They may survive.

"Hurry and give me the injection!"

Numbly, he replies, "Okay."

Quickly Mikasa shoots a smoke over their head, to tell the rest of his decision to use the serum—at this for Armin.

Except when he's going to handle the serum to Eren, another voice calls his name. "Sergeant Levi, finally I caught up." He glances at the soldier whose back is carrying another man—a man whose back he knows like the back of his hand. "Erwin is in danger. His stomach—all the intestines were damaged. He doesn't have enough blood." The soldier continues, "I think the injection will help. What should I do?"

"—what?" Erwin... is alive?

Levi staggers. Clutching at the box of the serum tight to his chest as he sees the man—the most important person in his life—is barely alive but... Erwin is alive. It is more than anything Levi can ever hope.

The serum will help Erwin. The serum—

"Sergeant?" Eren speaks up.

Startled, Levi turns his head. He remembers, he had said the serum would be for Armin. But then the soldier also says that Erwin is still breathing. That Erwin is still alive.

And Levi has to choose.

All his heart, he wants to save Erwin. But Erwin would reprimand him if he choose his feeling over logic.

"This injection will be used on Erwin," Levi decides.

He knows that's the right choice. While both Armin and Erwin are ones with brains to plan humanity's survival, but both of them are also different. Erwin is much more experienced—he has years of being a soldier and a leader in gruesome situations they has encountered. That man is also an experienced fighter, someone with the strength and the brain to fight for humanity. And they may win, with Erwin as a titan to fight on their side against titans.

Erwin frankly is much more valuable than Armin.

Hearing his decision, Eren rises to his feet. Eyes ablaze with anger and sadness. "You said you will use it on Armin—"

"I will save the one who can save the world."

Beside them, Mikasa moves. Eyes wet from tears as she looks at him in confusion. These soldiers—kids—are going to lose their best friend. The one they love and they cherish.

Just like Furlan and Isabel for him.

But Levi stands his ground. He's the one with the responsibility of humanity in his shoulders. The one who has to choose the one who'll save the world, and it's not Armin. Levi can live without Eren nor Mikasa's forgiveness. He can live with their hatred. But Levi can't live to know that he couldn't keep his promise to Erwin—the promise to save humanity.

Deep in his heart, his hope is burning once again.

Notes

AND WE HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL SEPTEMBER FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER

WHYYYYY

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