Recognizable characters belong to JK Rowling
He looked deep into his grey eyes as he ate. He could tell that the man across the table from him was trying. He could tell by the way the grey eyes averted his gaze that the man was sick of trying and failing. He reached out to grad the man's idle hand, only for it to fall off the table and into his lap. Holding back a sigh, Albus reached for the wine bottle instead, pouring more into his glass.
"Dinner was great tonight," He said as he put his dish into the sink. Reaching to turn on the water, Scorpius turned on the tap before he could.
"I've got the dishes tonight," The blond said, breaking their usual routine. Albus stared at him for a couple seconds before he moved out of the way.
"Okay, I'll put on a movie then." He grinned up at his husband, "Do you want anything special?"
"Comedy please?" he asked with a small grin. Albus nodded and kisses him on the cheek before making his way out of the kitchen and into their room.
It was one of those days. The days where getting up was hard and moving around was worse. They had lived through many of these days and they had gotten through them together. Once, when he was asleep, Scorpius had told him that the days like these were easier with him around. Albus would play those words in the back of his head throughout the day to keep himself strong.
As he put the dvd in he heard a faint popping noise in the background.
He thought that it was silly that he had to keep himself strong on days like these. It wasn't his mind that was attacking him on the inside. It wasn't his nerves that were making it seem like the most ordinary things were impossible.
The blond's head appeared in the doorway, a fragile grin gracing his face. "I put some sugar on it, I hope you don't mind."
" Sounds perfect," Albus said, leaning in to kiss Scorpius and then take the bowl from his hands. "Get in the bed, I'll give you a massage"
"Let me get ready first," Scorpius said, smiling just a bit more before disappearing into the closet.
Albus grinned and set the popcorn to the side and made his way under the covers.
After a few minutes, Scorpius still hadn't returned. Albus sighed as he got out of the bed and made his way into the closet. The blond was sitting in the middle of it, half undressed, looking at his hands.
"I can't Albus," was all he muttered, his hands shaking in his lap. "I can't"
Quickly, Albus made his way over to him, sitting down next to him and wrapping and arm around his waist. "It's okay love," he whispered, pulling the blond into him. "It'll be okay."
Albus didn't know how long they sat in the closet. His voice was going hoarse from his whispering and his eyes were stinging. He could faintly hear the television in the background, muffled voices and laughter the melody playing under the consistent flow of 'I can't' and 'I'm sorry'.
Eventually the background noise changed to the endless loop of the song on the menu screen and Scorpius' voice had died out. The shaking stopped and Albus waited for the song to play three more times before he reached under Scorpius and picked him up. Automatically, the blond turned into him as Albus carried him to the bed.
Tucking him into bed, Albus kissed the blond's temple and then reached for the popcorn. He brought it back to the kitchen and wrapped the top of the bowl in plastic. If Scorpius woke in the night, it would be there for them, if not, he'd toss it before the blond woke in the morning.
He turned off the lights and then the television, climbing once again into his side of the bed.
"I'm sorry," came a soft whisper once Albus had placed his glasses on the side and rested his head on the pillow. He hadn't thought that Scorpius was still awake.
"It's okay, love," Albus breathed, pulling him closer.
"No, it isn't. I can't, I can't do anything right." Scorpius rushed out. "I'm a screw up, everything I do is wrong and nobody likes me."
"I happen to like you a lot," Albus interjected, hoping that it would mean something.
"Yeah, but you're the only one," Scorpius sighed, turning away from Albus, "And I don't even see how. I put you through all of this shit and you see all of my screw ups first hand. It's a miracle that you are still here really."
"No it's not," Albus said, feeling completely useless again. He would do anything to make it better, to have him happy, for these day to never come.
"Right," Scorpius huffed.
Albus closed his eyes and rested his hand on Scorpius' shoulder only for it to be shaken off.
"I love you," Albus breathed out, looking at the still figure next to him.
"I love you too," Scorpius said. It sounded like a reflex and Albus swallowed. He knew that Scorpius did mean it, but it was hard. He felt selfish for wanting more than just a reflexive 'I love you,' knowing that whatever it was going on inside of Scorpius' head was worse than what he felt. It was just one of those days that he, that they, would have to get through.
Staring up at the ceiling, Albus waited for the breathing next to him to regulate into the deep and steady breaths that he knew so well. Once he was sure that Scorpius was in a deep enough sleep, Albus got out of bed.
Making his way to the kitchen first, Albus tossed the popcorn, something that he should have done the first time, but was too hopeful to. Then he went about cleaning the rest of the kitchen. The wine bottle was left open on the table and Albus smiled at it. Scorpius forgot the wine fifty percent of the time. Albus had thrown away many half empty bottles since their marriage, it always brought a smile to his face when that was the first thing that he saw when he woke up in the morning.
He pulled out his wand and double checked to make sure that the wards were up. They were.
He looked in the sink to make sure nothing was left. There was a knife. He put that away.
He made his way to the living room. He fixed the throw pillows. He closed the curtains.
He went into the bathroom, brushed his teeth just to be sure.
He hung up clothes in the closet.
He went back to bed and closed his eyes.
.:.:.:.
"How late were you up last night?"
Albus opened his eyes to see grey ones right above his. "Wha?"
"How late?" The blond said sternly.
Giving a sheepish smile, Albus shrugged and wormed his way out of bed.
"Don't give me that Al, you only sleep past your alarm when you were up late."
"How late am I love?" Albus called from the closet, ignoring the question still. He didn't have an answer anyway.
"Half an hour." Albus could practically hear those grey eyes roll. "You've got toast and jam on the table," Scorpius said when Albus walked out.
"Merlin, I love you," Albus said, kissing Scorpius before rushing into the kitchen and shoving toast into his face.
"You better," Scorpius called after him. Albus smiled when he hear a chuckle behind him.
"Of course I do," He said, leaning forward to kiss his husband again. "I love you, goodbye," He grinned before apperating out of the house and into the ministry. Today was looking to be a better one.
I am taking request to get back into the writing mood, trying to do thirty minute drabbles every day. If you have something that you would like to see written, feel free to message me anyway that you would like (review, Pm, or tumblr ask).
If you notice something that needs to be edited, feel free to message me about that as well. One can only get better through constructive criticism.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.