Dearest Moony

Summary: Sirius writes Remus a letter telling him that he's spending the summer at James's house. Groveling ensues.

Warnings: slash pairing: don't like? Don't read.

Rating: T (Sirius groveling = minor swearing)

Pairing(s): Wolfstar (aka Paradox's OTfuckingP)

Length: Drabble (405)

Disclaimer: All characters belong to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. We've already realized that I can't write multi chaps, do you think I can write seven 500 page books? I don't think so, darling!

Prompt: (I saw this prompt on tumblr somewhere but can't remember where so don't kill me if it's from your site!) Sirius writes Remus a letter telling him that he's spending the summer at James's house.

Dearest Moony,

I am writing to you from the esteemed Potter household. (Esteemed being the operative word as at the moment James is literally whimpering Evans's name in his sleep. Merlin, he's sunk low hasn't he?) Anyways, you're probably wondering what exactly ol' Padfoot's doing shacked up here feasting on Mrs. Potter's cooking, eh?

I am pleased to inform you that I have joined the charcoaled embers of the damned.

And not in hell, if that's what you're thinking. (Though to hear that hag I call a mother's parting words to her loving son, it's as good as. But hey, if Mrs. Potter's cooking is the equivalent of rotting in hell, Devil take me!)

Mother's blasted me off the wall.

I'm not going to go into detail how I heroically saved your (and James's, Wormy and the entire non-pureblood population's) names from being tarnished. (Don't go thinking you're special now, Moony!) But I did.

Praise me, oh lowly peasant!

Just joking with you, of course. But seriously, Moony.

I deserve an award.

The reason I was writing to you in the first place was not to tell you of my brilliant acts of bravery. You know I can't help it Moony. I am a selfish bastard after all that was momentarily humble by admitting that, but I'm now going to ruin that wonderful effect (Then again, isn't every effect on me wonderful?) and demand something devastatingly easy and terribly selfish. (Though, in retrospect, everything I ask of you could fall under the same category…)

Moony, darling, would you please (someone better be recording this. Sirius Black actually said please!) Get your skinny, furry ass down here because I am insanely and incurably bored.

Yes, I know I'm spending the whole entire summer at one of my best mate's houses and there is no reason on this earth why I should be bored, but we've already determined that I'm inhumanely handsome, maybe the same can be said about the rest of me.

I also acknowledge the fact that I'm a right old prick and that I deserve nothing short of rotting in a hole until my dying days, which are hopefully soon and full of pain and sorrow.

Just get your ass down here.

Yours in handsome pleading-ness,

The Most Selfish-y Selfish Bastard in the World,

Sirius Black

P.S. See if you can drag Pete out from whatever hole he's hiding in without him crumbling into a heap of ashes or something.

P.P.S. I may or may not have chocolate.

(HE DOESN'T)

P.P.P.S. Ignore James, Remus, he's lying.

P.P.P.P.S. Chocolate, Remus. I mean, come on.

A/N – So, something new. How'd you like it?

Big Question:

Should I write a Remus reaction fic to it? It would probably also just be a short little drabble.

I don't know.

Review, rant, critique, flame, I don't care.

Just tell me how it was!