It was a lovely day the sky was blue with no clouds in the other raven boys had gone to search for Caves and the birds were singing outside Richard Ganseys bedroom he had invited Blue to come and look for some new information on caves to help them but all he could think about was the last time they had been alone.
Why did Gansey feel so conflicted about it would it even count as a kiss?
It had been more special than that with the moonlight shinning on Blue he just couldn't resist thinking about kissing her but what shocked him the most was when She quickly threaded her hands into his hair and pulled him close their noses touching with only small distance between their lips.
His breathing laboured there was no one else in this moment, only them and the the beautiful stars in the night sky as a cool breeze drifted around them.
She stared into his eyes his pupils dilated and she supposed she looked the same,this feeling was like a drug to them and she had to admit she was beyond attracted to Gansey III and that she needed more.
In that moment they just stared into each other's eyes,none of them daring to breath,In fear of distrupting this tender moment his muscles were ridged under her grip,their bodies hummed with excitement they were fighting it just as much as they were letting it control far would they let it go this time his heart was beating with anticipation as she bit her lip and looked into his eyes.
So far it had only happened once almost slipping up and kissing Blue What was a kiss without a kiss?
Blue knew that it wasn't really a kiss but she thought the moment before was the best part of a kiss and she didn't have much experience but she knew there was nothing better than this feeling.
Gansey looked at Blue and she looked so care free under the stars and so beautiful she was wearing a blue floral sundress and her flip flops were on the floor next to was reckless he shouldn't be feeling this way,this attraction was building up and next time he wouldn't be able to stop her.
Blue looked at Richard Gansey iii dressed in his khaki pants and a collared shirt,his hair spiked in all directions in that cute way he loo ked handsome in a geek charming way and that was putting it lightly because he was hot.
She could feel him staring at her his gaze penetrated into her skin until she got goose bumps and she knew it wasn't from the open window,she moved to touch his shoulder and was momentarily dazed when she felt a spark right up her arm, quickly, it shot up and down causing her to shiver.
She suspected that when she had gone for his shoulder,he'd gone for her hand. "Gansey we can't do this."She struggled internally with her told her to get closer to him.
He stroked her cheek tenderly and attempted to put a loose strand of her hair behind her ears,Blue couldn't help it her body responded and she shivered into his hand getting the contact.
He moved closer to her so now they were facing each other."How can something so wrong feel so right okay so Perhaps you kissing me won't kill me maybe your true love is in Colorado taking his sats."Gansey smiled but it didn't quite reach his eyes.
They both knew that this curse said that if she kissed her true love he would die and after seeing Gansey on the ley line that day she wasn't going to take any chances.
When she didn't answer he looked into her eyes it was taking all his strength to not kiss her right now they're noses were inches apart and they were practically breathing each other's air he couldn't concentrate with the heat of their bodies and the need of a kiss.
"I want it too."she waited before looking at him for the but,he knew it was coming so he studied her face it was flushed and her eyes were filled with desire he could see that she was trying to stay in control but she was losing the battle.
"I can't take that chance Gansey and we both know my true love is probably you because there's that chance." He decided that actions spoke louder than words and trailed soft kisses down her neck on to her pulse point moving downwards at a tantalising slow pace and stopped her thought processes until she was mush.
Blue realised she could touch him and she wanted to, She needed to,she weaved her hands behind the sensitive part of his nape,He shivered taking in an unexpected breath and moved closer whispering into her she couldn't stop, she was a supernova as Her hands mapped his body, his back, his muscled stomach,the v above his hips and went back to his face as they traced the outline of his lips.
He gently whispered against her hand."There's that 1% chance I'm not and anyways I would gladly die having kissed you than any other way."It scared him but knew that he loved her and not bieng with her terrified him more than the idea of death.
He Thought that dying by her lips would be a sweet death because He couldn't live not bieng able to kiss her with the pain of Only remembering secret tender touches they never spoke about again and left Gansey wondering if it would be so bad if He just pulled her close and kissed her until they both saw the stars,they shared a near kiss under.
"This is hard for me too do you know how many times I think of just kissing your every second of the day but I don't want to lose you and this is torture because you might be my true love."She had no answer to that so he just did what he could and hugged her.
The hug said all the things they couldn't say and gave them hope of one day bieng able to kiss each other without a curse In the Way it was perfect.
They moved to sit up from the bed in Ganseys room and just hugged each tightly afraid the other would let go.
It was comforting and made Blue feel very soft and light weighted ."You make me feel safe." she whispered in an inaudible voice as she gathered her strength and asked "What do you think our lives would be like without this curse?"Gansey leaned forward and kissed the top of her head and replied in a low voice.
She was scared of the answer.
"I would kiss you each and every moment I could,with hot desperate kisses filled with desire to show you how much I want you.-he looked at her seriously-and long tender kisses to show you how much I love you then I would give you chaste kisses in the middle of those kisses so you know that I'm always thinking of kissing you in every moment."He replied smiling sneakily at her she almost believed that this could happen for a minute they dreamed about what life could be.
She could feel him breathing and she knew they had to stop whatever this was because it could never be but she couldn't bring herself to so she leaned in closer and closer and rubbed her nose gently on his nose it was cute she almost felt like they were a normal couple.
But normal was not a word she would use to describe them but she somehow liked that.
She always thought that normal was overrated and who wouldn't want to just cuddle with a person who might be her true love and never be able to kiss him unless she wanted to kill him?
Okay so not many girls would be lining up to take her place but she wouldn't have it any other way.
She knew he wouldn't too because at that moment he whispered "I would rather be near you and still have the danger of dying from your kiss than not bieng with you at all Jane."
She smiled at the use of the nickname he had picked for her, she replied"Same dick."He chuckled at that and they snuggled closer content with the feeling of being close to her Gansey shut his eyes.
Blue couldn't help thinking negative thoughts:How long would this last?If he found Glendower would he have any time for her? Would he go to a fancy college and leave her by herself? She knew that he wouldn't because no matter how much she denied it her and the raven boys loved each other and Gansey would always be there for her no matter how many times she told him she could take care of herself.
Gansey could have stayed like this forever but he knew they couldn't last, there were too many complications but he wanted to fight for be with her.
He knew that He might as well wait until they got back from finding Glendower and if they survived then they could be knew that Ronan knew about his feelings for Blue and Noah would accept it but what about Adam with Cabeswater he wasn't the same.
Would he be jealous and act out?Gansey didn't want to hurt his friend but he cared about Blue a lot.
He would face those problems when they came but for now it was just him and Blue.
She would face everything when the time came but right now it was just her and Gansey.
It was a kiss without a kiss.