Fear and Love Chapter 1: A Meeting in Theed, a star wars fanfic

I do not own Star Wars or any of it's characters. They are all owned by Lucasarts and George Lucas.

This story follows Ben Skywalker, Jacen Solo, and Jagged Fel. All three of them have a dilemma and it has something to do with the women they care about. Yes, Jaina, Tenel Ka, and Tahiri will make an appearance because well, they are crucial to the plot. But this story is mainly told through Jag, Jacen, and Ben's viewpoints.

This is a four chapter story and this is chapter one. Expect some humor and lots of romance. I hope you enjoy this.

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The water ran smooth and calm down the river in Theed. The street lights were dimly lit and the windows from the nearby buildings shined bright. The very sight of the light's reflection on the tranquil waters was breathtaking and sort of created a relaxing vibe in the area.

It was now midnight in the city of Theed. A time of the day when couples, young and old, came out and enjoyed a nice romantic night in the city. But then there were those like 20-year-old Ben Skywalker who would just come out to relax and relieve themselves of the stresses of everyday life.

Ben, who had long straight red hair and blue eyes, breathed out a sigh as he leaned back on the rather long bench, which was located right along the waterfront. He then smiled thinly as he listened to the peaceful and rather soothing sounds around him. From the soft slosh of the gentle moving water to the sweet tune that the violinists played at one of the nearby four star restaurants, it all just added to the peaceful feeling that was now coursing through Ben's veins.

The entire area was, without a doubt, the perfect place to clear the mind of any stressful thoughts. After a hard mission or a rough day at the Jedi Castle, (which was located right next to Theed Palace) this was pure bliss to Ben.

As soon as Ben closed his eyes, he suddenly felt a familiar presence approaching to his left. Ben frowned then opened his eyes and heard his cousin's voice.

"Ben?" asked Ben's cousin.

Ben looked over to his left and saw his cousin, Jacen Solo, standing near the edge of the bench.

"Jacen?" Ben replied with an incredulous look.

"What are you doing out here at this time of night?" asked the 37-year-old male Jedi knight, who had brown eyes and short brown hair.

"I was about to ask you the same question." Ben said with a thin smile.

"Well, I came out here to relax." Jacen replied as he folded his arms across his chest. "What about you?"

"I'm trying to do the same thing." Said Ben.

Ben breathed out a sigh then leaned back on the bench and added. "Plus I got some things on my mind that I'm trying to sort out."

"Well, Ben looks like you and I are in the same boat." Jacen said as he walked over and sat next to his cousin on the bench.

He then added. "I too have some things on my mind."

"I doubt your problem is like mine." Said Ben.

Jacen shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not; what exactly is it that's troubling you, my young apprentice?"

"Hmm…I don't know if I should tell you." Ben said skeptically.

"Why not?"

"Because if I tell you, you'll probably just tell me to forget about it."

"It depends, what exactly are we talking about here?"

Ben sighed then replied. "Well…you see…there's this woman."

"Ooohhhh." Jacen replied with a look of understanding. "So you have fallen in love with a woman, huh?"

"Yeah, pretty much." Ben said as he looked down at the ground.

"And let me guess, you want to tell her how you feel about her."

"Yeah, I do, it's just…I'm afraid to." Ben said as he kept his gaze towards the ground.

"Hmm. Well, now," Jacen said as he leaned back on the bench. "The problem is now more understandable…. by the way, Ben, who is the woman?"

There was a long silence before Ben finally answered. "Tahiri."

"Tahiri!?" Jacen replied with a hint of surprise.

Ben nodded then looked away from the ground and to the side.

Jacen was silent for a second then a grin crept up on his face. "Well, this certainly is interesting." He said.

Ben looked at Jacen with a frown then asked. "What is?"

"First, my brother had a thing for Tahiri, and now you. It's kind of ironic if you think about it." Said Jacen.

A sad look appeared on Ben's face. He then looked away from Jacen and back to the ground.

Jacen noticed this and immediately tried to cheer Ben up. "Hey, look. I know, you're scared and all. But like I tell you in training, you must focus on the positives. Even though I think it's…interesting, that you fell in love with the same woman that Anakin fell for long time ago, I feel that you should tell her how you feel. I mean, who knows, you and her have been around each other everyday, she might feel something for you. As well."

Ben, who still had a sad look on his face, stared at jacen then replied. "You know, it's funny you mention Anakin. He's actually part of the reason why I'm afraid to tell Tahiri that I love her."

Jacen frowned. "How so?" he asked.

Ben folded his arms across his chest. "I heard some of the tales about Tahiri and Anakin. Anakin loved Tahiri. He held a special place in his heart for her. They had a special bond from what I hear. I bet when he…passed away, he held on to that love for her. And even though he's gone, she probably holds on to his love in her heart."

Ben looked away from Jacen and to the water. He shook his head and added. "I fear that I might come between that love. And I don't want to."

"First of all, Ben." Said Jacen. "You don't even know for sure if she feels that way about you. And secondly, if she does feel that way about you, she'd probably have a place in her heart for both you and Anakin. I mean, it's not like the heart runs out of space or something. So there's really nothing to worry about right there. It's really up to you at this point. Personally, I think you should tell her."

"Hmm. I don't know, Jacen." Ben said with uncertainty.

"You won't know for sure unless you tell her, Ben." Said Jacen.

Jacen then folded his arms and added with a rather grave look on his face. "Besides, look on the bright side, at least your situation is no where near as frightening as mine."

Ben turned his gaze back to Jacen then asked curiously. "And what exactly is your situation?"

"Let me put it to you like this: it's one thing confessing to a woman that you love them, it's another thing to ask her to marry you." Said Jacen.

Ben thought for a moment then it dawned on him. "By the cosmos, you're going to propose to Tenel Ka?" Ben replied with a smile and in a joyous tone.

"I WAS going to propose to her today. But-"

"But what?"

"But I got afraid that she was going to say 'no'. In fact…I have this deep itching feeling that she will say 'no' on the spot if I ask her." Jacen said with a hint of sadness in his voice.

"Wait a minute, just a second ago, you told me I wouldn't know how Tahiri felt unless I tell her about my feelings. And now here you are going against your own advice when a similar thing is happening to you."

"Well, this is different though."

"How is this different? I mean, aren't you the one who constantly tells me not to focus on the negatives?" countered Ben.

"Yeah, but the difference is this negative thought of mine could easily become a negative reality." Replied Jacen.

"Master…" Ben said as he shook his head. "You're going against your own advice."

"Yes, and as your master, I urge you not to be like me and conquer your fear by telling Tahiri how you feel about her."

Ben shook his head again. "I don't know if I can do that. But I know you can propose to Tenel Ka."

"No. At this point and time, you can tell Tahiri and I can just sit and imagine how it would be like to have Tenel Ka as my darling wife."

"She would say 'yes' if you ask her."

"I'm not so sure about that." Jacen countered.

"Why?" Ben asked with a frown in a slightly annoyed tone.

"Because she might like things the way they are. Marriage is a huge step. She may not want to take that step. I mean, after all, she does have her duties as a queen mother." Said Jacen.

He then added in a sad tone. "And compared to her, I'm nothing but an insignificant little peasant. I can remain her boyfriend. But she probably wouldn't want me as her husband."

Jacen dropped his gaze to the ground with a very depressed look on his face. There was a moment of silence until Ben spoke.

"She loves you, right?" asked Ben.

"I guess she does. She tells me everyday." Replied Jacen.

"Well you see, there's a high chance that she might accept your proposal." Ben said confidently.

Jacen breathed out a sad sigh. "I doubt it. She wouldn't accept."

"Yes she would."

"No she wouldn't."

"Yes, she WOULD." Ben said a little more forcefully.

Jacen looked at Ben with a frown then countered with the same amount of force. "No, she WOULDN'T."

"YES, SHE WOULD."

"NO, SHE WOULDN'T."

"What are you two prattling on about?" asked a calm, manly voice from the left of the bench.

Ben and Jacen, who still had frowns on their faces, looked to their left and saw 38-year-old black haired and blue-eyed, Jagged Fell, standing two feet away from the bench. Jag, who was wearing a brown tunic and black pants, had his arms folded across his chest and stared at the two Jedi with an eyebrow raised.

Jacen was the first to reply. "Oh, we're just having a peaceful discussion about our dilemmas with women."

Jag stared for a second then replied in his usual calm but stiff tone. "It sounded more like a debate than a peaceful discussion."

"Yeah, well…you know." Ben said nonchalantly.

The young adult Jedi then asked curiously. "Anyway, what are you doing here, Jag?"

Jag briefly looked over at the water then back at the Jedi. "I came out here to relieve my brain of a certain dilemma that's been making my days rather…uncomfortable."

"Sounds like you came to the right bench." Said Jacen. He then offered. "Have a seat."

"Actually, I'm looking for a place that sells liquor." Said Jag.

He then added as he took a seat next to Jacen. "But I think I can spare a minute just to find out about you gentlemen's dilemmas."

"Pretty much our problem is fear and love. And how they work so well together." Ben said in a tone of annoyance.

"Huh?" replied a baffled Jag.

"Well in other words," Jacen said calmly. "Ben is in love with Tahiri but is afraid to tell her how he feels about her. And I want to ask Tenel Ka for her hand in marriage but I'm terrified beyond reason."

Jag looked at them for a second then spoke. "Aren't Jedi supposed to be fearless?"

"On missions, we're fearless. With love and women, we're cowards." Said Ben.

"But I heard for a Jedi that fear leads to anger, so-" replied Jag.

"In this case, fear leads to nervous, nervous leads to frightened, frightened leads to terrified." Jacen said in a nonchalant tone of voice.

Jag, who was slightly confused by the Jedi's unique change of the cycle, thought for a minute about what they said then silently looked over at the tranquil moving waters in front.

Jacen looked at Jag then asked. "So what's your problem, Fel?"

Jag turned his gaze to Jacen then replied. "Mine? Mine is similar to yours, Jacen."

"Really?" Jacen replied in an interested tone.

"Yep." Said Jag. He looked down at his hands then spoke again. "You see…I love your sister more than anything. So much that I, want to ask her to be my wife. I have the ring, but I'm afraid to propose to her."

"Wow…your situation really is like mine." Said Jacen.

"No, I think it's worst." Replied Ben. "For you, Jacen, there's a 10 chance that Tenel Ka will say 'no'. And for Jag, there's an 85 chance that Jaina will say 'no'."

"You got your percentages all wrong, Ben." Replied Jacen. "It's more like 90 for me and 80 for Jag."

"Sheez. I was sort of expecting one of you to convince me to stop being a coward and just propose to Jaina. Instead you guys have as much confidence in her saying 'no' as I do." Jag said while folding his arms across his chest.

"Well…remember, you still have a 20 chance." Jacen said reassuringly.

"You have a 15 to me. But still that's higher than the chance of Tahiri liking me." Said Ben.

Jacen rolled his eyes. "Don't listen to my apprentice. His situation is way easier than ours."

"Actually it is." Jag said in agreement.

Ben slapped his forehead with his right hand then slowly rubbed it down his face.

"WHAT IS SO EASY ABOUT MY SITUATION!?" Ben said in an annoyed tone and with an incredulous look on his face.

"Simple. It's a win, win situation." Jag said calmly.

"How is it a win, win situation?" asked Ben, who still had an incredulous expression on his face.

Jag then explained in a very intellectual style of tone. "Well, you see, Ben, unlike me and Jacen you have no serious or sensual relationship with a woman. You just have an established friendship and you simply wish to take it in a more serious direction. However, because of that well-established friendship, it creates a win, win scenario. If Tahiri indeed feels the same for you that you feel for her then your friendship will turn into a more serious relationship. But if she doesn't, you still have that friendship. Where as with me and Jacen, if our proposals get turned down, it would mean that the women we love don't love us enough to the point that they would want to spend the rest of their lives with us. Don't get me wrong, your situation is stressful…just not like ours."

Ben thought for a minute about what Jag said. After a moment of silence, Ben nodded then spoke. "You guys are right. Your situations are far worst. But that doesn't mean I'm not afraid."

"I think we made it quite clear that we're all pretty much afraid." Said Jacen.

All three of them agreed on the 'afraid' part then turned their gazes to the water. For several minutes, they just stared and relaxed in silence near the gentle moving water. But as time went on, thoughts of the three women swept into their minds. Images of all the good times they had shared with the women coursed through their brains like the sooth flowing water in front of them.

The thoughts were actually starting to make them feel really miserable and pathetic. Here they were, three men who have overcome countless of dangerous scenarios, are afraid of the very ones who have made their days worthwhile. It was ridiculous and the three men were beginning to have enough of the nonsense.

Jag spoke first. "Gentlemen, we should be ashamed of ourselves. We are acting utterly foolish about this whole thing. I mean, why should we be afraid? We have looked death in the eye and have fought dozens of battles. So we shouldn't be afraid of the people who made our days bright."

"Jag's right." Replied Ben. "We're acting stupid."

"Yeah, I guess." Jacen said with uncertainty.

Jag snapped his fingers then said. "How about this, gentlemen. Let's make a vow to each other that tomorrow at four 'o'clock, the three of us will tell the women that we love what is on our minds. How about that?"

Ben and Jacen thought for a minute about the offer. Ben was the first to respond. " Sounds like a plan. I'm in."

Both Jag and Ben looked at Jacen, who was silent and had his arms folded. He then looked from Jag to Ben.

He breathed out a sigh then said in a surrendering tone. "Alright. I'm in."

Jag gave a nod, smiled, and then said in a confident tone. "Then it's settled. At four tomorrow, I will propose to Jaina. Jacen, you will propose to Tenel Ka. And Ben, you will tell Tahiri that you love her."

They shook each other's hands then sat back and relaxed for the rest of the night. The deal was set, now they just had to make it so.

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That is the end of chapter one. I hope you all liked it. The next chapter will be up later.