Disclaimer: Don't own Twilight, wish I did
Purely an indulgent piece, enjoy!
I watched the setting of the sun. Slowly, softly it sank into the earth, leaving behind pink and purple clouds of cotton. Something about sunsets always caused a gut-wrenching feeling to take over my body. I moved my hand to catch a tear as it descended down my cheek from my innermost spirit. I stopped to allow it to die. Soon all would be enveloped in darkness.
The memory slowly crept into my head, stealthily looking for that crack to penetrate. Like a disease it would spread. I tried to focus on the sunset, on twilight. I walked into the woods, the crisp leaves crunching beneath my feet, my face trying to catch the last of the warmth from the diminishing rays. I could hear the approach of night, the stilling of nature.
Nature still moved me and I was thankful. I thought back to my friends. Diana, the high executive lawyer, would rather have a root canal than stroll in the woods with me.
"Oh Bella. You're so damn outdoorsy. Come to LA with me instead, we'll go shopping. I have to have that new Prada purse." I smiled faintly remembering her babbling. How our friendship worked was a mystery.
I touched the leaves of the shrubs growing on either side of me. They were cool and felt alive. I breathed their life deeply, imagining their tender youth flowing through my veins. Somewhere I heard barking. It must have been Cari, beckoning me home for dinner.
I turned and ran towards my house. The breeze caressed my skin and my lungs ached. I loved every minute of it. Cari, my German shepherd, greeted me jumping up happily to lick my arms. I petted her soft head. I felt a love for her that I could have never imagined was possible after him. It was pure, completely selfless. She never asked for anything, never demanded. Our relationship was simple and unconditional.
I bent down to her and wrapped my arms tightly around her neck. I cried without restraint, emptying every ounce of strength left. When I turned to look at her she stared as if questioning me, but I knew she never judged.
"Oh Cari. If only…." I whispered. She came closer and licked my tears. I laughed wholeheartedly.
I entered my small house. It was dark now, only illuminated by the tiny bit of light still gracing the sky as dusk fell. I walked to a shelf lined with pictures. I felt the same gut wrenching throb spread through my body. I bent down and clutched Cari. My eyes roamed over the dusty frames. Within them lay the foundation of my heart, the beginning of my love. I spotted the bright red of my Chevy, my quirky smile in which I recognized total content, utter happiness.
His face. It bore into my mind every time I looked at it. The shimmering topaz of his eyes, the perfect teeth exposed in a handsome smile revealed the creature I no longer believed existed. His beauty radiated even now, illuminating the photograph. I felt the waves of sorrow wash over me, at first gently, as if testing me. They mounted and intertwined as a tsunami of grief flood my heart completely. The house drowned in total darkness, but I could still see his perfect features lingering in the blackness of night.
I didn't bother to turn on the lights that night. It no longer mattered. Instead I opened the windows to let in the night's scent. A cool breeze tickled my skin and ruffled my hair. It was beautiful. Tragic. But I would not cry. No. After all these years I thought back to all the things I wanted to remember, wishing just as badly that I could forget.
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