A/N: first fic so don't kill me or sue me if it sucks... no title yet so guys tell me if you have any idea what I can call this ayt? And this first chapter is mostly Natsuki dreaming, seeing her self.

"Natsuki talking in her dream"

'thoghts of Natsuki in her dream'

'Thought/thinking about something'

Don't own anything. Just the thoughts for this I own… nothing else. The story is pure fiction and just works of my imagination.

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Six months has passed since she moved to Tokyo and Natsuki was doing fairly well. Doing odd jobs at first which were all part-times, then she was offered a regular spot at a garage that she was working part time for. The owner is a very kind man and he favors Natsuki a lot because even though she's a woman, she works as hard as the guys at the garage or sometimes even more. She has a job fixing motorcycles at "Quick fix Garage" but she was always fighting with the Manager because he's always giving her a hard time about her job. Always accusing her of not doing her job properly, not meeting her quota per day and giving her all the most difficult to fix motorcycles. He's practically a pain in the behind. The Manager at "Quick fix Garage" named Larry was a fat man with a large ego the size of Jupiter, was driving her nuts and he makes her work like a horse everyday. And she knows the reason that he's doing this is because he always think that he's the alpha male and girls are not suited to work at a garage and do a man's job. Even though she was complaining about the Manager, she can't possibly quit any time soon because she has to at least stick around for the owner over the kindness that he showed and she needs the money to cover her living expenses. And it's hard to find a decent job with a decent pay in Tokyo.

It's a Friday night and Natsuki just came from a hard day's work. Her usually straight, long midnight tresses were tied up in a pony tail showing her face more and her vivid emerald eyes looked tired and sleepy from the day's work. She removed her black biker jacket and was wearing only a razor back top revealing her toned muscles and porcelain skin. She placed her blue helmet to the table near the door and she took off her work-shoes and tossed them to the side. Dragging her feet to the fridge she opened it and took out a can of coke. She opened it and drank half of the contents in an instant "aaaaahhhhh…that had hit the spot" she wiped her lips with the back of her hand and made her way to her small living room, she grabbed the remote and turned on the T.V. and sat down at the couch. She flipped channel after channel and she found out that nothing good was on. Only re-runs of old movies are available on every channel that she scanned. After a while she settled on an old western movie. Men riding horses in the old west and it was in black and white. After an hour or so she fell asleep with the sound of guns being fired from the T.V. she was half asleep when her phone rang. She checked the caller I.D. and groaned its Hyuuga. He was one of her least favorite 'friends' at work (as if she has any friends). She Flip her phone opened and answered it "what do you want Hyuuga?"

-"oi! Kuga! That was a pleasant greeting" he said in a very sarcastic tone

"whatever. What do you want?"

-"I was thinking… since it's a Friday night, why don't you join me and my friends. We are going out in one of the hottest clubs in town. I know your just drooling there in your couch"

"what does that got to do with me?"

-"I just want to hang out with you. Nothing more and nothing less. Since you came into town, I haven't had the pleasure of your company outside of work. I just thought that we can bond a little"

"I can't. I have things to do"

-"oh c'mon Kuga. I know your not doing anything at all"

"I am gonna do something important"

-"like what? Sit on your couch and eat mayo filled sandwiches?"

There was a long pause and she thought about the mayo sandwich that Hyuuga mentioned and drooled at the thought of eating one. But she knows that Hyuuga would be pestering her the whole night if she won't go with him.

"ok just this once Hyuuga. What time and where are we going to meet up?"

-"yeeessss!!"

"oi dumbass!! Don't shout over the phone! I'm gonna go deaf here! So what time and where are we going to meet?"

-"uhhh… hehehe… sorry about that. Let's meet up by 10:00 P.M. in front of Purple Haze. You know that place right?"

"Yeah, yeah I know that one. Is that all Hyuuga?"

-"uh yeah"

"Purple Haze, 10:00 P.M. ok got it. Bye"

With that she ended her conversation with Hyuuga. She closed her phone and placed it at the small center table in front of her. She looked at the clock at the wall and it was 8:30 P.M. "Damn that Hyuuga. I was planning to stay in for the night. Now I have to think abut what I'm going to wear" she sat there for a while thinking of what she will wear then she looked up at the clock again "shit. It's already quarter to nine better to get going then" she got up from the couch and headed to the bathroom that is situated inside her bedroom. She took a quick shower and after fifteen minutes she got out of the bathroom with just a white towel hugging her torso and a white towel drying off her dark locks. While drying her hair with her white towel, she opened her dresser. She stood there and looked at it for quite a while figuring out what she will wear for tonight "aaahhhh hell! As if I'm gonna dress to impress someone!" she said with an annoyed tone in her voice. She got out her hip hugging jeans, a blood-red shirt and a 'rock is dead' plastered to it and a cotton black jacket with thin white stripes. After a few minutes with everything in place, she looked at the mirror to get a quick glance of herself "well, I think this is good enough" with that she sat on the foot of her bed and took out her favorite dark blue Chucks. It was dirty, but it's her favorite. When she finished, it was already quarter to ten. She took her helmet from the table and headed out. She got to her new black Ducati Multistrada 1100 S, put on her helmet, swung her right leg and straddled her bike and turn on the engine bringing her precious bike to life.

She zoomed with ease in the night traffic passing cars as if they aren't there. It's like the city is just a playground to her. She arrived in front of the Purple Haze just in time and Hyuuga and his so called 'friends' are not in sight. She dismounted from her bike, took off her helmet and put it in the compartment. She stood by her Ducati for a few minutes and she was growing impatient 'if that guy doesn't show up in the next five minutes, I'm going home'. Just as she thought she was going to go home, someone from a far was shouting her name "oi!!! Kugaaaaaa!" she turned her head and saw a man with jet black hair and brown eyes. He was about 5'8 has a muscular body, not bad looking and most girls would drool when they see him. But actually he's just not Natsuki's type. He was wearing a plain white cotton shirt and an army green button jacket, acid wash pants and brown leather shoes. Hyuuga and his friends started going towards Natsuki's direction. With him in tow was his friends and both of them are girls. This made Natsuki wonder if he's just a ladies man or a bi-sexual. "What took you so long? I've been here for ten minutes"

-"gomennasai, Natsuki… I have to pick up my friends from their house" he said with a sheepish smile "uh yeah I forgot to introduce my friends. That's Anna," pointing to a red head girl wearing a grey mid-rib tank top with pink linings and a miniskirt. Then he placed his hand on the shoulder of the other girl with long wavy brunette hair wearing a one piece black dress with a very low neck line that's revealing her cleavage and highhills gladiator sandals "and this here is Yui". Natsuki looked at them for a while and said her greetings to them. After the introductions, they have finally decided to go inside the club.

The line to go inside was so long it had stretched up to the end of the block. Hyuuga went straight to the bouncer

"hey there, we are on the list" the bouncer only looked at him then at the list.

-"name?"

"Nakamura"

-"no Nakamura here" the bouncer said while looking at his list

Startled at this, Hyuuga started to look from left to right not wanting to be embarrassed in front of his friends.

"try Hyuuga" the bouncer only looked at him

-"nope, not in here too"

"oh c'mon it must be there somewhere"

-"hey pal, I'm telling you, you're not in the list. Now step aside people are coming in" the bouncer said this with emphasis on every word.

Hyuuga went back to Natsuki and the others and in a low voice said "he won't let us in" his friends went big eyed after hearing the news

-"I thought you already have it reserved?" said the red head

"I did. My connection told me that he booked us already"

The two girls went on ranting at Hyuuga for making a huge mistake.

Natsuki was only shaking her head and went to the bouncer. Hyuuga noticed this and tried to stop Natsuki. When he had almost reached Natsuki he stopped in his tracks when Natsuki talked to the Bouncer "hey Joe,"

the bouncer looked at Natsuki forming a smile on his face

-"my, what a surprise, It's the famous Natsuki. I haven't seen you around lately"

"well I have been busy with work,"

-"is that so?" he said with a smile

"yeah. Joe, I need a favor. Is it ok?" she said with a small smile

-"sure. What is it?"

she looked at Hyuuga and his friends

"can you let my friends pass for tonight?"

Joe looked at the group of people that Natsuki was mentioning

-"ok. Anything for you Kuga"

"thanks Joe, I owe you one" She looked at Hyuuga and his friends then nodded her head to signal her companions to go inside with her.

The loud hip-hop music was blaring full force from all the large speakers from the corners of the club. It was dark inside and only laser lights and flash like lights are blinking in sync with the beat of the song can be used as a source of light. The place was packed with people because it was a Friday night and everyone is ready to wind down and party. Natsuki and the others have to literally elbow people aside because there's no space for them to pass through.

As they made their way inside, the people working there seem to know Natsuki. The bartenders keep on smiling and nodding at her direction every time they see Natsuki. When they have reached their table that is situated at the V.I.P. section of the club, a very surprised Hyuuga asked Natsuki with curiosity

"hey, how come the bouncer knows you?"

-"oh that? I come here all the time to unwind"

"whaaaat?!" Hyuuga stared at her with big eyes "I never knew you were a nocturnal"

there was an odd pause then Natsuki broke the silence between them -"I only come here when I wan to".

After a few more minutes of Hyuuga ranting about Natsuki being a nocturnal, Natsuki signaled for the waiter. When the waiter arrived at their table, he took out the menu and list of drinks (which is in a glow-in-the-dark print) and handed it to them. He smiled at Natsuki

"what is it for tonight Natsuki?"

-"hey guys what do you want to order?"

Hyuuga looked at the list

-"one beer bucket. Is that alright with you Natsuki?"

-"yeah"

-"margarita for me," said Anna

-"and I'll have a cosmopolitan" chimed Yui.

After the waiter wrote down their orders and repeating it, the guy took off to get their drinks. When their drinks arrived, Yui suddenly asked Natsuki

"hey Natsuki your not from around here are you?"

Natsuki looked across the table to Yui's direction

-"nope"

"where you from?" asked Anna after having a sip of her margarita

-"Fuka"

-"is that the island that you are referring to?" Hyuuga said while taking a gulp of his beer

-"uh yeah. That's the only Fuka that I know"

-"wow! They say that that island is very nice. A perfect place to relax" Anna said after taking another sip of her margarita

-"yeah that's what the information board say" Natsuki said with a sarcastic tone

–"so what made you move here?"

-"no reason"

-"c'mon Kuga. Seriously, what's your story?" Hyuuga asked in a playful manner

-"no comment" Natsuki said in a monotonous voice at the same time she glared her green eyes at Hyuuga signaling him to give it a rest.

When he saw those green eyes gleaming and giving him daggers, it gave Hyuuga goosebumps allover his body and beads of sweat started to appear on his forehead. Hyuuga only formed a nervous smiled across his face and silence rested on the four of them only the loud music and chattering of people can be heard. Anna and Yui looked at each other wide eyed and thinking the same thing 'we need to break this' nodding in unison, "why don't we dance?" Anna and Yui both stood up from their seats and Hyuuga looked at them and responded quickly with a nervous voice "yeah. Let's do that" he stood up from his seat and when they were about to go to the dance floor, they noticed that Natsuki was still in her seat

"aren't you coming Natsuki?"

-"You guys go ahead. I'll be there soon, and besides, I don't feel dancing yet"

"ok just look for us at the dance floor if you decide to change your mind ok?"

-"sure"

Hyuuga, Anna and Yui went to the dance floor and Natsuki only watched them as they disappear into the crowd.

Natsuki was left there all by herself and her beer bottle that was half empty. Relaxing her back into the chair, she took her beer bottle to her lips and drank some of the contents inside while closing her eyes and slightly knitting her brows together 'fuck that Hyuuga asking too many questions. Well, it's not really that much but he should've known that I don't talk about my past. That's why I hate going out with co-workers all they do is ask unnecessary questions' taking another gulp of her beer, she tried listening to the music and it got her irritated 'I wish that they could change the music to something alternative or rock…oh right it's a Friday. Hip-hop night' .She drank the last remaining contents of her beer, when suddenly a waiter approached her table and placed a fresh glass of 'Screw driver' in front of her

"hey, I didn't order this"

-"It's already paid for, Natsuki"

"who is it from?"

-"That girl over there,"

Natsuki looked at the direction of the said girl and the girl smiled at Natsuki in a very seductive way

-"and she also told me to give you this" the waiter handed Natsuki a folded white paper napkin with the logo of the club and left.

Looking at the napkin, she opened it and only saw a single kiss mark inside. Natsuki closed the napkin and placed it inside her pocket. She smiled took a sip of her 'Screw driver' while looking at the girl from across the room and the Girl was looking intensely at her. Natsuki stood up from her seat taking the drink with her; she walked towards the girl who bought her the drink. As she drew closer to the girl, Natsuki noticed that the girl looked really attractive. She has brunette hair with highlights; her skin was the color of light caramel that glistened every time that light touches it. She has almond eyes and voluptuous lips that anyone would want to kiss. This kind of beauty is what one might call "exotic". The girl was wearing a loose silky white midrib blouse and the neck line hanged around her up to the chest area and it was attached to the center of a pink brassiere to cover her chest, it was paired up with black pants and white belt. The pants hugged the girl's thighs perfectly and she was wearing white stiletto pumps.

Natsuki stopped in front of the girl and nod at her. The girl stood up from where she's sitting and took the drink that she bought for Natsuki and placed it at the table. The girl batted her eyelashes only once and looked at Natsuki in the eye and took her hand and led her down to the dance floor. Being led by the girl, she formed a small mischievous smile across her face. She immediately knew what the girl wanted from her and decided to make the girl her 'plaything' for the night. She didn't even bother to ask the girl's name because she knew that it would be just for one night.

She didn't actually know how to dance but the girl's hips were keeping her busy. The girl's back was against her front and the girl's bottom was brushing against her. Her hands were at the girl's hips but it's now traveling to the girl's flat stomach. The girl's left hand was at Natsujki's nape; her right hand was keeping Natsuki's hand in place at her flat stomach. Natsuki's head was tilted downwards and was at the girl's neck. Natsuki can even smell the sweet scent of her Shampoo and perfume 'mmmmm… smells like strawberry and champagne'. They grinded their hips together in sync with the loud hip hop music that was blaring through the speakers. After a while of dancing, they were both sweaty and Natsuki was getting tired and decided to go home. Because of the close proximity between them, she only needed her lips touching the girl's ear to do the talking for her. The act sent shivers to the girl and Natsuki felt the goosebumps that were forming on the girl's skin. The girl gripped Natsuki's hand and no words were needed to know what the other was thinking. They slipped out of the club and rode Natsuki's bike. Natsuki revved it up a notch or two, eager go home quickly and the both of them have the same thing in mind.

They arrived at in front of Natsuki's apartment in no time. She parked her bike and helped the girl off the bike and motioned the girl to follow her. She found her keys too fast and opened the door to he apartment. Once the two of them were inside, the girl couldn't get her hands off Natsuki. The girl launched forward to kiss her as soon as she had closed the door. The kiss was deep, intense and in a hurry like the one you do when you want to do 'it'. She started to fidget with Natsuki's clothes trying to get her jacket off of her and they started to walk towards the bedroom while kissing, clothes falling one by one by the floor.

It was dark and they didn't bother to turn on the lights. The girl was kissing her like there was no tomorrow and it was just as Natsuki liked it. She doesn't have feelings for the girl, but it was one way to forget everything. They were both naked and stumbled into the bed, ready to give in to ecstasy.

Natsuki kissed the girl with the same fervor that the girl was giving her. She repaid every lick, suck, and touch that the girl has given her and she seduced her until she was craving for more.

From the girl's lips, Natsuki trailed kisses to the girl's neck resting her lips on the girl's sensitive spot while removing her white blouse and bra. She licked her down to her collar bone and trailed butterfly kissed down to the girl's boobs. She played with them teasing them under her breath. She sucked on the right boob while her left hand played with the girl's left nipple twisting it until it was hard. Then she started licking and sucking it, flicking her tongue over the hardened nipple over and over again. Natsuki's left hand traveled to the girl's inner thigh caressing it until she found the wetness that is building up between the girl's legs. She found her clit and played with it using her thumb and she heard the girl moan loudly under her touch. Hearing this, Natsuki used this as a go signal to go all the way. She slid one of her fingers in and out of the girl in a slow motion and heard her moan again. She pushed another finger in and she fastened the pace and the girl's fingers were digging at Natsuki's back. Natsuki kept that pace until she screamed and let out her orgasm. Natsuki pulled out her dripping fingers out of the girl and rolled off of her. They were both breathing heavily from the recent activity and they both lay down in bed staying in that position for a few minutes. The girl said something but Natsuki didn't really pay any attention to her. The girl's hand traveled to Natsuki's breast trying to play with them, but she didn't want the girl to touch her so she pushed the girl's hand away gently and got up from bed and went to the bathroom to take a hot shower. Once inside she turned on the shower and relaxed under the soothing warm water. She stood there tilting her head up and closed her eyes letting the warm water clean her body. She stayed like that for a few minutes, until she got out of the shower. When she returned to her bedroom, the girl already fell asleep and was wrapped under the sheets. She tossed her towel aside and lay down on her side of the bed, pulled up her blanket up to her chest and drifted to sleep.

'Darkness… this world is covered in darkness…and its so damn cold. I feel like I'm floating. Even if this world is cold and dark, I feel comfortable here. It's like I'm ok with it. I feel the darkness welcoming me to its arms. Maybe accepting "this" won't be that bad.' She looked from left to right like looking for something to pass by in front of her 'Where the fuckin' hell is this place anyway? I've never been here before but at the same time it feels so familiar to me and Its only empty space here.' She stayed in that position for a while, until she noticed something in front of her. 'Something's changing over there' her surroundings started swirling round and round causing her to have a slight vertigo. "What the hell??! What the fuck is happening??!"

She was standing in the middle of a room of a very modern apartment. It has a white sofa and couch, There was a big plasma T.V. mounted at the wall and a glass table in the middle. There were Stacks of books and biker magazines on top of the table. To her left, was a kitchenette, she figured that only two people can be accommodated in that kitchen because of its small space. To her right, there was a brown door. She stared at it for a quite a while "why is this place very familiar to me? It's like I've been here before but I just couldn't remember…" she walked towards the brown door her quivering right hand was outstretched towards the bronze doorknob. And when she was about to open the door, she heard a couple of muffled voices. She leaned the left side of her head and placed her left ear to the door so she could hear what the people inside the room are talking about. They were two female voices inside. The other one is aggressive and the other one has a melodic tone to it. Both of them are arguing and shouting but she couldn't understand a thing that they were arguing about. She listened some more, now she could hear them crying and one of them was pounding at the walls.

"Natsuki Please! Stop doing that… I'm begging you to stop. Your just going to hurt your fist" she heard the beautiful melodic sound of the girl's voice but there was pain in the way the girl spoke and she was shocked at what she heard.

'That girl mentioned my name' now she listened more intently.

-"what the hell do you care Shizuru?! You don't really care what happens to me! You've already have made that god damn clear!" The other girl retorted at her with an angry tone.

-"Natsuki, please… stop it… I'm really sorry Natsuki"

-"Whatever Shizuru. I'm getting out of here!"

'Shizuru? I know that name…'

She heard the footsteps of the aggressive girl approaching the door so she stepped back. She heard her heart pounding against her chest and it feels as if her heart will soon be out of her ribcage any moment now because she was afraid that the people inside the room will notice her standing there. Her back to the wall, the door swung opened with much force that it collided against the wall and a dark blue haired girl with emerald eyes emerged, stomping her way out of the room. But as the girl with emerald eyes walked her way angrily out of the room, the chestnut colored haired girl with crimson orbs followed her scrambling to get to her. She looked hard at the girl with the midnight tresses 'that's me…and I know that girl… and they didn't even notice that I'm here. They couldn't see me or sense my presence' she thought as she continue to watch herself and the other woman.

When Shizuru caught up with the rage filled Natsuki, Shizuru desperately tried to catch one of Natsuki's wrists and when she finally got a hold of Natsuki's wrist, Natsuki swung her arm with much force that Shizuru stumbled back landing roughly on the floor. Natsuki stopped from walking when she saw Shizuru on the floor. Looking up, Shizuru's hands reached out to hold Natsuki's left hand once more

"Natsuki please forgive me"

it's almost a whisper and only the two of them can hear it. With out an answer, the dark haired girl only looked down on her, with disgust at her tear stained face and hate radiating from her eyes.

-"let go Shizuru. I can't be here with you like this. I can't stand it. I might do something worst than that" Natsuki gritted her teeth while saying those words.

Understanding what Natsuki meant by those words, Shizuru loosen her grip on Natsuki's left hand. With that Natsuki left the apartment without even looking back at the crying Shizuru. The only noise that can be heard inside the apartment was the crying of the brown haired girl.

Looking at the sobbing girl at the floor she realized that this was her life 'I am Natsuki Kuga and this is the life that I was desperately trying to forget and run from. Because Shizuru did something horrible to our relationship' She then realized that she was clutching her chest because there was a piercing pain there. She tried to walk towards the girl, reaching out her right hand to the direction of the sobbing girl "Shizuru…I'm sorry" feeling the pain in her chest building up, she stumbled near the girl "Shi-Shizuru…" Shizuru kept on crying and she didn't even hear the person that has been calling out her name.Her vision started to get all blurry and hot tears started flowing from her own eyes to her cheeks "Shizuru,Shizuru,Shizuru…"

Her surroundings started to go round and round again. She closed her eyes because she was feeling dizzy from the swirling of her surroundings. It was like riding a roller coaster over and over again. She clenched her fist tightly until the bones became visible through the skin "make it stop please make it stop" she repeated over and over again.

She tossed and turn in her bed, both of her hands gripping the sheets tightly. She opened her eyes and sat up. Breathing heavily, she touched her face. She was crying and having cold sweat then she realized that it was only a dream, a part of her from her not so distance past.

After a few minutes of contemplating she heard a small whimper beside her. She looked at the naked sleeping form beside her. She was wondering why there is a naked girl sleeping peacefully in her bed. Then she remembered that the girl was from last night, she sighed to herself 'another night, another girl… One night stands, having sex with girls I don't really know and making them believe that I really feel pleasure under their touch. After all that, I still feel empty. No satisfaction at all. All their kisses were empty and I'm just making a fool out of myself. I thought by doing this I could forget… forget about you, about us, everything. I have been doing this since I left you crying in our apartment and I'm getting sick of it… No one can really replace you, Ne, Shizuru? No matter what I do, I'm still in love with you …' she has a sad smile plastered to her face and her throat was tightening and she felt that she will soon be crying. Natsuki brushed off the tears that were building up in her eyes. The figure beside her stirred and faced the wall. She looked at the girl for a moment, and then she got up from the bed, got her bathrobe and slid it to her arms and tied a knot to close it to her waist. She opened her bedside drawer and took out a golden ring from its box. She clutched the simple gold ring in her hands and she went to the window and looked absently outside "Shizuru…I'm coming back to you and I'm going to make you mine again no matter what…"

TBC?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------A/N: what do you think? Should I continue? Comments and suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Sorry if you think that it sucked so don't kill me, sue me or throw stones at me. And bear in mind that this is my first fic.