UNSAID
by ardavenport
The gorgeous orange sun set over the vast city-plain of Coruscant. High up on the balcony beneath the apex of the Council spire of the Jedi Temple, Obi-Wan Kenobi stared at the fiery primary star of the planet, dimmed and reddened by the atmosphere, half of if already sunken below the horizon line.
Leaning on the balcony's railing, he breathed in halting gasps and sobs. Finally alone, he could release his anguish and shame to the uncaring outside air. The endless streams of Coruscant air traffic that passed the Temple glided to and fro, unconcerned about one twenty year-old Jedi Padawan's tragedy.
He had known that this meeting with the Jedi Council would be difficult. But it had been far, far worse than he had thought. The displeasure and disappointed glares of the Council members, encircling him just moments ago, drove his grief. How could he have been so wrong? Ruined things so completely? Betrayed Qui-Gon so badly? How could be have doubted his Master's true intentions?
Looking down the long fall to the deeply shadowed durastone below, he thought about jumping. With nothing but rushing air, gravity and the Force around him that would blot out his misery as he focused only on guiding and slowing his descent to land on and slide down the outer wall of the Jedi Temple to its base. Perhaps running around the Temple's perimeter a few times would further distract him from the total shambles he had made of his last mission with his Master.
Tears still running down his face, he gripped the railing hard at the sound of footsteps approaching from behind. Qui-Gon.
The older man said nothing. He assumed a position at the balcony's railing on Obi-Wan's right, the orange last-light of day shining on his calm bearded face. Obi-Wan's eyes darted away, back to the diminishing disk of the sun, sinking lower and lower.
Stifling his sobs, he wiped his face and nose on the large sleeve of his Jedi robe.
"I have failed you, Master," he said, staring downward into the twilight shadows below, his voice unsteady.
"No," Qui-Gon immediately answered, strong and calm.
"I disobeyed you." This came out better, his voice less unsteady.
"You had ample reason to."
Wiping his nose again, he sniffled and then winced at the awful snorting sound he had just made. Obi-Wan looked up. Qui-Gon had turned away from the disappearing sun and now leaned on the railing, his arms folded over his chest.
"You were not wrong to act as you did, my Padawan."
"I ruined the negotiations. The Derivulian conflict will continue for months until the negotiators agree to reconvene again. Kasiak Uzeller has been permanently removed from them."
"Yes," Qui-Gon agreed, annoyingly calm and unemotional. "My attempt to influence her failed."
Some of Obi-Wan's misery transformed into anger at this colossal understatement.
"You were having sex with her in the alcove two minutes before the last session began!" Obi-Wan exclaimed.
"Ah," Qui-Gon nodded, apparently only slightly disturbed. "I was not sure if you were aware of that one. I was understandably preoccupied at the time. Though I was aware of your presence in the garden, the anteroom and the panty. And under the bridge."
Obi-Wan turned away, but the sparkling lights of the city under the rapidly darkening sky were no escape from this compounded embarrassment and his Master's calm over the whole disaster. He thought about jumping again.
"When the Council gave me my instructions," Qui-Gon's voice went on, "I immediately asked to be sent on this mission alone. They denied my request, saying that your negotiating skills were essential. They are very impressed with your capabilities," he added gently.
The compliment did not lessen Obi-Wan's wounds as he looked out at the endless points of lights of the city, but be felt slightly less shamed.
"I requested that I be allowed to tell you what their private instructions to me were, but the Council decided that it was best that you not know. It was unnecessary for a Padawan to be informed."
"Then did the Council order you to have sex with Minister Uzeller at every opportunity?" Obi-Wan demanded.
"They didn't," Qui-Gon answered. "They very carefully worded their instructions. 'By any mean available,' I was to influence her to advocate for peace. For the good of the whole negotiations. Nothing was directly said. Nothing on the record. Minister Uzeller is a strong-willed woman, but her weaknesses are well known to our intelligence. And when Master Billaba pointed out that Uzeller would be favorably impressed with my physical appearance, their instructions were quite clear. And unsaid.
"And instructions that are unsaid are given to the fewest number of people possible."
Night was falling quickly. But the city-plains of Coruscant were never dark. The air cooled around them and the wind picked up, catching the edges of their Jedi robes and the strands of Qui-Gon's long hair. Obi-Wan felt better, knowing now that his Master had not succumbed to some inexplicable late-middle-age hormonal madness.
Obi-Wan nodded, accepting.
"The negotiations were important," he said, his tone lifeless. "If I had not publicly questioned Minister Uzeller's judgement and told the other parties that she might be unwholesomely influenced by you, they might have agreed to the cease-fire. Now, hundreds might die in the conflict before the negotiations can resume." He pulled his own robe around him and folded his arms tightly before him.
"Yes," Qui-Gon agreed. "But you did what you needed to. You saw a clear abuse of a mind influence, a violation of the Jedi Code, and you acted to end it."
"But you were not acting for personal gain," Obi-Wan almost pleaded, turning to his Master. "You were acting for the sake of the mission, not to dominate the Minister."
Qui-Gon shook his head with a sad smile. "But I was dominating her. And she enjoyed it too much. But the Jedi Code does not give exemptions for abuse or over-use of a mind influence." He sighed. "Which is why the Jedi Council's instructions were unsaid."
"The Jedi Code is not precisely clear about what abuse or over-use are," Obi-Wan countered. "And given the circumstances it could be argued that it was necessary."
"And yet. . . . . you saw abuse. And you acted," Qui-Gon observed, looking up at the darkened sky still faintly luminous with the light from below. Only the brightest stars shone through the difuse, perpetual night glow. "And the Council's instructions were. . . . unsaid." He extended his hand, laying it on his apprentice's shoulder. "And they now regret their choice not to inform you of their instructions to me. They see now how greatly they underestimated your ability to understand what is . . . unsaid."
Obi-Wan's shoulders slumped; the Council had certainly not said so when he had stood before them a short time ago.
"I did not understand. And at great cost. I disobeyed your order to say noting of your actions to the other negotiators."
"Regrettably so," Qui-Gon acknowledged, patting Obi-Wan's shoulder.
"Is it possible to re-establish the negotiations sooner? I had some rapport with Councilor Shematy," the young Jedi asked.
Qui-Gon shook his head. "No. Our part in the Derivulian negotiations is done. We would not be welcome. The Republic will have to send other representatives. And I at least will be limited to the Temple for the immediate future, in token discipline for my indiscretions."
"But you were following the Council's Orders," Obi-Wan objected, but Qui-Gon smiled.
"Unsaid orders. And it is a token discipline only."
"And myself?"
Qui-Gon put his arm over Obi-Wan's shoulders and they began to walk back toward the inside light of the Temple spire.
"That is left to my discretion. And I can only recommended that we both review the subtleties of what is unsaid in the Jedi Code. I know the Council will. And I think that it is best for me to remain out of sight for now. There have already been several coms for me from Minister Uzeller. My influence was surprisingly short-lived for her and she was very demanding. At the most unexpected times. That made it impossible for me to be as discreet as I, or the Council, had planned. As you observed."
Obi-Wan winced. He had heard and glimpsed much than he ever wanted to. Then he grinned, wondering what penance the Minister would demand if she could.
"She could come to Coruscant to inquire after you."
"Then," Qui-Gon said with a worried grimace, "I shall be very glad that the walls of the Jedi Temple are very tall and thick."
They walked inside together.
*** END ***
This story first posted on tf.n: 30-March-2009
Disclaimer: All characters and situations belong to George and Lucasfilm; I'm just playing in their sandbox.