Those eyes.
They shined like diamonds.
That hair.
It was a beautiful, curly jungle.
Those lips.
They looked full and kissable.
That skin.
It felt soft and glowed golden.
The problem?
You thought this was a female I was describing?
You're dead wrong.
You see, I'm in love with my best friend.
My best friend just so happens to be a guy.
And I just so happen to see him almost every day.
Do you think it's easy?
Do you think it's easy to hide from everyone at work because of these feelings?
Do you think it's easy not knowing if I've gone crazy?
Do you think it's easy not being able to be with the one I want?
Once again, you're wrong.
It's not easy.
If people at work find out, I'll lose my job.
If I'm straight, then why would I have such a strong desire for a man?
If I told my best friend about this, what do you think would happen?
If I lost my job, I could always find another one.
But, it'd never be as good as the one I have now.
Wrestling has been in my blood for years.
I certainly wouldn't want to risk losing my job over some crush.
It just wouldn't be worth it.
This is the first time I've really liked a guy.
Some may say it's a phase, but I beg to differ.
They're wrong.
They don't know how I feel.
They don't know me.
And the worst part?
Having to act like I'm just his friend.
Having to act like I'm okay that he'll be getting married soon.
Having to act like I'm fine that he'll never give her up for me.
And having to act like I'm okay with the fact that he'd never love me back.
The pain comes to me everyday.
Sure, I get hurt physically.
But this time, it's my heart, and it's dying away.
I can hear it breaking into little pieces.
I can hear it beating fast whenever he's near.
I might not be able to hear it for long, though.
I long for this man, ever since the first day I met him, actually.
I knew there was something there, and he damn well knew it, too.
Every time he'd talk to me or even give a friendly touch here and there…
I'd get nervous, dizzy almost.
I'd lose my train of thought and my heart would run wild.
This man makes me feel like no other woman has ever made me feel before.
And the thing is that he's not even dating me.
This man is special to me.
I wish he could see how I see him one day, and see me the same way I see him.
I want him to hold me and love me.
I want him to kiss me and to tell me that everything will be alright.
I want him to cuddle with me at night when I'm cold.
I want him to be mine.
I'm afraid that none of this will ever happen.
So here I stand, pills in hand.
The clock is ticking away, and I'll say goodbye, as this will be my last day.
He'll never know how I feel, because to him, it all would be unreal.
And now to my Roman, without further ado, I, Seth Rollins, will always love you.