Disclaimer: Don't I wish?
AN: One of the most disapointing things about Noir was that we didn't get a really clear impression of what happened in the scenes with child Altena. Some hints, yes, but not very much. Which as anyone knows is the ideal place for fanfic to step in and say hi. Despite the fact that this could have used a better author, being such a great series. And I *like* Altena, and this is one possible interpretation, and I just can't write endings these days. Damn. Spoilers.
ALTENA
They'd killed everyone. Mama and Daddy shot down, and red sticky blood flowing everywhere- starting already to decay and stink in the blazing sun. She sat, blank and motionless, and grasped her doll with one hand. Some of them were still around.
The Soldats. Mama had told her to be careful, that they'd hurt her if they found her... But she'd read the books. She'd climbed up the ladders in the library, paging through ancient texts in a desperate search for knowledge- and this shouldn't be happening. Soldats were good people, the books had said. They were the green hands that protected the peace... Protected the common people. Like her and mama and daddy and everybody that had died.
She stared blankly as a soldier tossed his gun to the ground in front of her. "What're you doin' here? Thought we got all of 'em..." Rough, harsh sounding voice. Chapped lips from the heat. Too big; frightning...
"Hey, what's wrong with you? Cat got yer tounge or somethin'?"
"You're... Soldats." she whispered into the still air. Not a question nor an exclaimation. A statement, timid, but only because she'd been taught not to talk to her elders.
He frowned and flopped down beside her. "Yeah, yeah, we're Soldats. Movin' out soon, right? We drew straws and I hafta look for survivors." A sigh. "Dunno if I can kill a kid. Lucky you, eh?"
Bizzare, she thought, that someone so casual could have slaughtered her whole village only hours ago. Something wasn't clicking. The Soldats in her books hadn't been like this- had been regal and secretive and dangerously alluring. Not just army troops in ugly olive green.
She clutched her doll tighter in her arms. "I don't know."
"Right," said the man flippantly, staring at the doll in her arms as if she was a baby to humour. "I like your doll." he said. "She got a name?"
She shook her head, somewhat shyly. "Daddy said I called her dolly." she muttered in shame. "But that was a long time ago. I'm seven years old now and she's just a doll that doesn't need a name. Not like she's real."
The soldier whistled, playing along. "Seven, huh? You're a big girl. What's your name?"
She could have told him. It wasn't like it mattered either way. What was a name if nobody would ever use it for her again? She had nobody. Remaining silent, she shrugged and looked up at him with dead eyes. "Why are you doing this?"
"Huh?" The man looked around, shaking his head. "I dunno, I'm just a private. Somebody tells me to go somewhere, do somethin', I gotta do it. Doesn't matter what. This," he gestured around the village, "Is just one more thing I do to get paid."
She shook her head, fabric rustling against her hair. "No! I mean, why is Soldats killing people?" She frowned and looked down. "The elder let me read the books... I thought you were about protecting the peace. And the people like us. But all this..."
The man raised a think black eyebrow at her and shook his head. "Nobody believes in that shit anymore, kid. All this is because we Soldats control the world or whatever... We're all just pawns till the day we die. So what does it matter if that day comes sooner for some than for others?" He laughed and patted her on the head like a dog that had done a good trick. "That's okay. You'll learn about the world soon enough."
Later- sun streaming through the paneless window, trying to breathe against the form straddling her and seperate herself from the pain and the faint noises- she realized that it was possible to kill people with love. He hadn't seemed like a bad person, but he'd killed her family...
And now was...
She focused blankly on the gun next to the bed, watching the sun glint off it and throw light on the walls. This couldn't be real. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right- it wasn't happening to her- it couldn't be... Soldats and everything...
And something inside her snapped as at last he got off her and the bed. She hated. For the first time in her life, she hated the people who would order a village killed for no reason and then let this happen to her. She hated them like a fire burning in her. And if Soldats could kill people with this great love of theirs, then she could use her hate to save the world.
Running, after he left wordlessly. Running to the manor she had no knowledge of. Her doll dropped onto the ground, and she left it there uncaring. There were more important things now. Because things like this shouldn't be allowed to happen in the world... As long as she kept thinking that, she could keep going.
Noir. She could bring back the bloodstained virgins and save the children.
She could... save herself...
END
AN: One of the most disapointing things about Noir was that we didn't get a really clear impression of what happened in the scenes with child Altena. Some hints, yes, but not very much. Which as anyone knows is the ideal place for fanfic to step in and say hi. Despite the fact that this could have used a better author, being such a great series. And I *like* Altena, and this is one possible interpretation, and I just can't write endings these days. Damn. Spoilers.
ALTENA
They'd killed everyone. Mama and Daddy shot down, and red sticky blood flowing everywhere- starting already to decay and stink in the blazing sun. She sat, blank and motionless, and grasped her doll with one hand. Some of them were still around.
The Soldats. Mama had told her to be careful, that they'd hurt her if they found her... But she'd read the books. She'd climbed up the ladders in the library, paging through ancient texts in a desperate search for knowledge- and this shouldn't be happening. Soldats were good people, the books had said. They were the green hands that protected the peace... Protected the common people. Like her and mama and daddy and everybody that had died.
She stared blankly as a soldier tossed his gun to the ground in front of her. "What're you doin' here? Thought we got all of 'em..." Rough, harsh sounding voice. Chapped lips from the heat. Too big; frightning...
"Hey, what's wrong with you? Cat got yer tounge or somethin'?"
"You're... Soldats." she whispered into the still air. Not a question nor an exclaimation. A statement, timid, but only because she'd been taught not to talk to her elders.
He frowned and flopped down beside her. "Yeah, yeah, we're Soldats. Movin' out soon, right? We drew straws and I hafta look for survivors." A sigh. "Dunno if I can kill a kid. Lucky you, eh?"
Bizzare, she thought, that someone so casual could have slaughtered her whole village only hours ago. Something wasn't clicking. The Soldats in her books hadn't been like this- had been regal and secretive and dangerously alluring. Not just army troops in ugly olive green.
She clutched her doll tighter in her arms. "I don't know."
"Right," said the man flippantly, staring at the doll in her arms as if she was a baby to humour. "I like your doll." he said. "She got a name?"
She shook her head, somewhat shyly. "Daddy said I called her dolly." she muttered in shame. "But that was a long time ago. I'm seven years old now and she's just a doll that doesn't need a name. Not like she's real."
The soldier whistled, playing along. "Seven, huh? You're a big girl. What's your name?"
She could have told him. It wasn't like it mattered either way. What was a name if nobody would ever use it for her again? She had nobody. Remaining silent, she shrugged and looked up at him with dead eyes. "Why are you doing this?"
"Huh?" The man looked around, shaking his head. "I dunno, I'm just a private. Somebody tells me to go somewhere, do somethin', I gotta do it. Doesn't matter what. This," he gestured around the village, "Is just one more thing I do to get paid."
She shook her head, fabric rustling against her hair. "No! I mean, why is Soldats killing people?" She frowned and looked down. "The elder let me read the books... I thought you were about protecting the peace. And the people like us. But all this..."
The man raised a think black eyebrow at her and shook his head. "Nobody believes in that shit anymore, kid. All this is because we Soldats control the world or whatever... We're all just pawns till the day we die. So what does it matter if that day comes sooner for some than for others?" He laughed and patted her on the head like a dog that had done a good trick. "That's okay. You'll learn about the world soon enough."
Later- sun streaming through the paneless window, trying to breathe against the form straddling her and seperate herself from the pain and the faint noises- she realized that it was possible to kill people with love. He hadn't seemed like a bad person, but he'd killed her family...
And now was...
She focused blankly on the gun next to the bed, watching the sun glint off it and throw light on the walls. This couldn't be real. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right- it wasn't happening to her- it couldn't be... Soldats and everything...
And something inside her snapped as at last he got off her and the bed. She hated. For the first time in her life, she hated the people who would order a village killed for no reason and then let this happen to her. She hated them like a fire burning in her. And if Soldats could kill people with this great love of theirs, then she could use her hate to save the world.
Running, after he left wordlessly. Running to the manor she had no knowledge of. Her doll dropped onto the ground, and she left it there uncaring. There were more important things now. Because things like this shouldn't be allowed to happen in the world... As long as she kept thinking that, she could keep going.
Noir. She could bring back the bloodstained virgins and save the children.
She could... save herself...
END