A/N:
It took terribly time for me to end this for some reason. And I can't really say that I like this one… And the ending is a bit clumsy too… Oh well… :D

Third time's the charm

"Go out with me."
Ed blinked and then looked Roy suspiciously. "Is it April's fool already? Or was that just some dull joke of yours? Ha-ha, very funny, please stop killing me, colonel."
Well, that wasn't very surprising. Actually, Roy had been 99, 99 percent sure that Ed's reply would be something exactly like that. Roy sighed; he had got to remember that this was Ed who Roy was dealing with. Between Roy and Ed, it really hadn't been love from the first sight… It had been quite the opposite as a matter of fact. Roy was pretty sure that Ed had never even considered that Roy would be attracted to him. Which he was. And which he had been for a while now. First it was just annoying and awful and god knows what. But Roy was Roy, he knew what he wanted and when he wanted something, he would have it. And Roy wanted Ed so it was obvious that Roy would have Ed. Roy just had the feeling that it would be difficult like everything including Ed seemed to be.
"I'm serious. I want you to go out with me." Well, that wasn't what Roy exactly wanted. He wanted Ed and badly. But it was better to be careful and proceed slowly. After all, it was Ed Roy was dealing with.
Ed looked a bit confused as he was staring at Roy's face, trying to figure out if the man was joking or not.
"I don't know what's wrong with you but… I'm gonna go now." And with those words, Ed left. Be patient, be patient, Roy thought. It looked like that was going to be his very own mantra for a while…

***

"Go out with me."
Ed rolled his eyes. "Are you drunk again?" Roy raised his eyebrow. "What do you mean? I've never been drunk at work." "Well then I suggest that you go and see a doctor. There's something seriously wrong with your head." Ed turned around and was about to get out of Roy's office but Roy got up and went to stand in front of the door so that Ed couldn't get out. "I want you to listen to me. I'm not drunk, there's nothing wrong with my head. I want you to go out with me." "Whythe hell would you want to go out with me?" Roy opened his mouth but closed it right away. He had no idea what to say. Well, actually, he had. "I'm attracted to you.", "I want you", "I can't stand you, and sometimes I just want to throw you against the wall and… kiss the shit out of you." Roy coughed. "Because I do." Ed's eyes darkened, his eyebrows furrowed. "I'm getting pissed off… so why don't you just shut up and leave me alone?" "I'm afraid that just won't do…" Even still, Roy enjoyed nothing more than annoying Ed. He was so easily provoked that Roy just couldn't help it. "You son of a…! Go to hell!" "Ed, oh Ed… Having that time of the month?" Roy watched the fire burning in Ed's eyes, watched his body shaking from anger. "I. Hate. You."
Ed pushed Roy out of his way and dashed out of the door. "Damn it", Roy sighed. He always seemed to do and say the wrong things… Maybe I should just give up and let it be, Roy thought as he sat down on his chair. When you stop thinking about it… Me, over 30 year old man and Ed, a 16-year old boy… That really can't be right, can it? Plus he's my subordinate… It could never be right. And well, it didn't exactly seem like Ed was crazy about Roy or anything… Maybe there really was something wrong with Roy's head. He was leaning back in his chair, eyes closed when suddenly he heard gun's click-sound. Roy opened slowly his eyes to see that Hawkeye was pointing a gun into his forehead. "Good evening, lieutenant. Always a pleasure", Roy said calmly. "Are you going to give up on him that easily?" Oh, great. Somehow Hawkeye had realized some time ago Roy's… attraction towards Ed, which was just a bit awkward for Roy. "What if I will? It's really none of your business", Roy snorted and pulled himself away from the pointing gun. "You're right, colonel. It is none of my business. I just think that a man, who gives up without even trying, shouldn't be considered as a man at all." Roy let out a dry laugh. "If that's what you think. I'm going home so goodnight, lieutenant… Thanks for the hard work." Roy was happy to escape from Riza's cold stare. Oh, this just gets better, Roy thought when he realized that it was pouring outside. It was just too typical in his life.

***

After some time, Ed was there, standing in Roy's office holding his arms against his chest. "I brought my report", he muttered and gave the paper for Roy. "It was about the time…" Ed snorted. "Well sorry if I just arrived back!" Roy sighed. "Whatever…" "I'll go now", Ed said quite awkwardly and turned around but when he put his hand on the doorknob to get out, Roy stood up and went to Ed, put his hand against the door while standing behind Ed's back. Ed turned around to face him and suddenly their faces were just inches away from each other. Roy leaned in and stared into Ed's golden, confused eyes. "Don't say it", Ed yelled before Roy could even open his mouth. "Huh…?" "I know what you're going to say… Just… don't say it." Roy smirked. "And why wouldn't I? Oh, could it be that in reality you want to hear those words…?" Well, after all, teasing Ed was the best thing to do for Roy. "Fuck off", Ed murmured but when Roy glanced at the boy's face, he saw that Ed was looking quite… puzzled. Could it really be…? Is he just pretending? "I'm going", Ed said and pushed Roy away, got out of the door. There was no way Roy would let him get away so easily. "Fullmetal, wait!" Oh for god's sake, Roy thought when he realized that he was actually running after Ed in the military. Roy managed to grab Ed's hand and tried not to mind about his subordinates who were looking at the two of them curiously. Roy was breathing heavily and so was Ed and Roy didn't even have the time to open his mouth when Ed said: "Fine…" It was a word with four letters, quietly muttered but still Roy had heard every letter of it. Roy tried to look into Ed's eyes but it was pointless; the boy was staring stubbornly his own feet. "Excuse me, I think I didn't catch that one", Roy said in a tone which surely annoyed Ed. "I said 'fine', you asshole! I'll… go out with you." Roy didn't even realize that he was grinning widely until Ed glared at him. "But that's only because otherwise you wouldn't give up, don't imagine anything else with that stupid fat head of yours…" Roy didn't mention that he had nearly given up… Anyways, he was damn happy that he didn't. "Very well then… I'll pick you up at 8 tonight", Roy said, smirking. Ed snorted. "Whatever, I just want it to be over…" Somehow Roy got the feeling that Ed didn't fully mean his words… Maybe he didn't. After all, Roy was very attractive and not even Fullmetal alchemist could deny that. "I'm sure you'll change your mind quite radically after tonight…" Ed raised his eyebrows. "And why would that be, colonel bastard?" Roy leaned in and whispered into Ed's ear: "Because I'm damn good at seducing. And tonight I will seduce you before you even notice." Oh, that had got to be the best day in Roy's life so far. Just seeing Ed's reddened face and the confuse in his eyes… Almost too enjoyable. But just almost. "Yeah, sure", Ed snorted and obviously tried to pick up his pride. "Eight o'clock it is", Roy said and turned around. The hardest part, persuading Ed to go out with him, was over… The next part was of course: the seducing. And Roy knew that would be the easiest part. Ed would be melt wax in Roy's hands after an hour. Roy got back into his office and leaned back in his chair whistling. Damn, he was almost too good! But, it was the truth: when Roy Mustang wanted something, he would have it. And so it was.

***

Riza Hawkeye smiled to herself. She watched as Roy walked away from Ed, obviously in a perfect mood. Well then, her work here was done. She shook her head and snorted quietly. Men, honestly, they couldn't do anything by themselves! When Riza had realized that there were something much more than hatred between Roy and Ed, she decided to keep out of it. But then it had seemed like they just weren't progressing at all, so Riza had to do something. Pointing gun at Roy's forehead and just few words were enough to make him not to give up on Ed. And what it came to Ed… That boy truly was even more stubborn than Roy! Riza still felt a bit exhausted when she remembered the discussion she had had with Fullmetal.

"Thank you for coming here at this hour", Riza said when Ed sat down at the coffeehouse. Riza ordered herself a chamomile tea and for Ed a cup of coffee since the boy looked like he definitely needed one. At times it was almost amusing how Roy and Ed were alike in so many ways but there was no way that either of them would ever admit it. When Ed was drinking his coffee, Riza finally opened her mouth. "You know, the colonel truly likes you." Ed lifted his head and smiled sluggishly. "Sure he does since I'm Fullmetal alchemist and he benefits from it." "No, that's not what I meant. He likes you personally. He's… quite attracted to you as a matter of fact." Riza looked into Ed's eyes and saw confusion and maybe… a tiny glitter of hope? "Nah, I don't think so… He's just playing with me. I've seen the way he stares at me when he thinks I don't notice. I'm pretty sure the only thing he wants from me is sex." Riza coughed a bit at Ed's honesty. She looked at the boy for a while and understood that Ed looked sleepy; maybe he had just gotten up, if the boy had slept at all since he sometimes tended to read all night through. It was a good thing for Riza so she didn't mind about it. "Listen to me, Ed. I know Roy quite well since I've known him for all my life. I always know if he wants to sleep with someone, if he wants to use someone, if he lusts for someone." And truly, there had been a lot of those times… "But it's different when it comes to you. Roy really cares about you, he desires for you. And he has desired for a long time. If he'd only lust after you, don't you think he'd already done something? With you he wants to be careful because you truly are precious for him." Riza looked Ed whose face was turning red and he clearly looked happy though he tried to cover it up. But for Riza someone like Ed was almost too easy to read. "But… a few days ago I saw him talking with some beautiful woman… She was laughing at him, touching him…" Riza couldn't decide should she feel pity for Ed who looked so terribly sad or should she just point her gun at Ed's face and demand him to go tell Roy about his feelings. Riza did none. "Roy told that woman that he couldn't go out with her because he's focusing on one person just now, which means you." Well, Riza didn't mention that Roy had also said: "If that won't work out, I'll definitely give you a call." It wasn't important because Roy and Ed would work out. Riza would make it happen. "But…" "No buts! I have to leave now. Thank you for listening, I hope you think about this while you're on your mission", Riza said and smiled. She got up and left Ed sitting in the coffeehouse looking completely messed up.

Riza chuckled at herself. Sometimes it was quite fun to work as the Amor. And she knew she had done good work when after a few days she saw Ed and Roy kissing passionately. She looked at them for a while but walked away. Her job was done for sure… But! Kissing in the street that passionately in front of everyone's eyes…? Riza sighed. It seemed like she'd have to tell Roy to be a little more careful about his new relationship… But Riza had the feeling that Roy would only laugh at her. Men, honestly… Oh well, Roy and Ed were together now, that was the only thing that mattered.