AN: This is a request from Shiranai Atsune, who asked for genderswapped Zen and Jumin! I'm sorry if this is pretty late, but I hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading my stories, you're awesome!


Scowling, Zen tossed her phone across the couch. It landed on her cushion with a soft pumh, not bothered by its trip in the least. Zen groaned and scrubbed at her face with the palms of her hands, only to realize that she was probably clogging up her pores with gross germ particles.

Dammit. And she'd just exfoliated the night before.

Zen knew she shouldn't stress so much—that's how people got acne, after all! —but she couldn't help it. She had a date with Jumin Han—yes, that Jumin Han, the stuck-up, arrogant cat bastard with a heart of gold—and she wasn't going to let him think she was just some gold-digging floozy! What better way to say that then a cute gift?

… And okay, maybe she also wanted to see that adorable smile of his. But only a little!

ANYWAY, it turned out that there was a tiny flaw in her brilliant plan—namely, she had no idea what she could get Jumin without blowing her entire savings. She could try to get him something affordable, but there was no way in hell her budget could get him a present that was both cute and cheap at the same time!

She let out another, more dramatic groan and picked up her phone again.

Time to take drastic measures…


Zen: MC

Zen: HELP

MC: ? What's wrong?

Zen: You know what the cat bastard likes, right?!

MC: Uh

MC: He likes… cats?

MC: And wine.

MC: R u still trying to buy a present to give him on your date?

Zen: yES

Zen: sorry

Zen: I just realized u probably think I'm yelling at u _

MC: No, it's fine!

MC: V told me you were worried about getting him a present

Zen: … how much did she tell u

MC: Uh ^_^

MC: She just told me she thought it was v cute how much u wanted to surprise Jumin

MC: And that she gave u a list of wines Jumin likes

Zen: Yeah

Zen: THAT I CAN'T AFFORD

Zen: I DRINK BEER DO U THINK I CAN AFFORD REALLY GOOD WINE

MC: Awww sorry DX

MC: Did u ask Seven for help?

Zen: Yeah but he just said he could loan me some of his "saucy" clothes

Zen: May have threw my high heel at him for saying that lol

MC: Please tell me that's only gonna be a one-time thing ^_^'

Zen: Probably lol

Zen: Seven just asked if I was gonna give him my other shoe

Zen: I don't WANT to know what he'd do with it

MC: Knowing Seven? Probably auction it off :(

Zen: *Angry emoji*

Zen: I WANT AN ANSWER DAMMIT

Zen: THE DATE'S ONLY TWO DAYS AWAY

Zen: THE BASTARD BETTER NOT THINK THAT HE CAN JUST WHISK ME AWAY IN HIS STUPID FANCY CAT-DRAWN CARRIAGE

MC: Lol

MC: I don't think you're giving Jumin enough credit, Zen.

Zen: *Sighing emoji*

Zen: Yea true lol

Zen: I mean

Zen: He has his charms

Zen: I just really want him to see that I'm not after his stupid money

Zen: and I don't want him to swamp me with presents

Zen: Ya feel?

MC: Of course! :)

MC: BTW, I think I found the PERFECT present for Jumin!

Zen: *Shocked emoji*

Zen: rEALLY?

MC: Yep! I'll send u an email with a link! :)

MC: Break a leg!


Zen closed her message inbox. With a mixture of eagerness, relief, and anticipation, she pressed on the email app icon and opened the most recent message from MC.

She read through it once, then twice. As she read, her expression morphed into a mask of disbelief, then irritation.

"You've GOT to be kidding me…"


One week and a date later…

"Oi, Jumin, I'm glad you liked your present, but can you maybe… you know, take it off for a few hours?"

Puzzled, Jumin glanced down at his girlfriend, who was staring at his tie like it'd personally offended her. He raised his eyebrow and followed her gaze, unable to see what the problem was.

"You were the one that gave it to me, Zen," He reminded her, his lips quirking into a smile.

He hadn't expected Zen to give him a gift on their first date (in hindsight, however, he probably should have. Zen always had a habit of taking him by surprise), but he was glad she did. It was a nice gesture, yes, and something that the gold-diggers that tried to court him didn't do, but it quickly became one of his favorite articles of clothing for reasons obvious to the both of them.

Zen wrinkled her nose. The cats adorning her boyfriend's tacky black tie mocked her by not responding to her distaste, too busy playing their musical instruments to acknowledge her.

… Granted, she'd be more concerned if they did come to life, but come on. Couldn't he just take it off for five minutes?

"Assistant Kang informed me that this tie comes with a matching hair ribbon." Jumin said, interrupting Zen's sulking. "Would you perhaps be—"

"In your dreams, trust-fund kid."