~Report of Misconduct~

Name:

Linden MacArthur

Date:

November 24, XX78

~Charge~

Unapproved contact with the Human World, Unsupervised meddling with Humans and 29th count of evading punishment.

~Testimony~

Interviewer: Now Linden tell us of the events prior to your arrest concerning your conduct.

Linden: Okay, so one day, I think it was around October, I was looking around for something to do and as always there was nothing. So I headed down to D-9 to see what the rest of the crew was doing, I didn't actually get there 'cause at around D-7 I ran into Harvey. We started talking and he just wouldn't stop whining about this one dude in The Plains that wouldn't stop annoying him. So to shut Harvey up I told him I would go down and see what I could do. So I took the next sub down and realized what a terrible mistake I had made, It literally only took me about two seconds, seriously if there is anything worse than being bored it's seeing other people being bored. It's like when you're hot and you see someone wearing a jacket and ya just feel worse. Why would they do that? Surely they must be hot too, why do they make everyone hotter? For what reason would they possibly-

Interviewer: Get back on subject Linden.

Linden: Oh right, sorry. So as soon as I get there this dude pops out of nowhere, scaring the hell outta' me. He tells me that his name is Romeo and that he wishes to send a letter to his parents, at first I try to dissuade by telling him that he should just wait for his parents to die, then he can do all the talking he wants. But then he argues back saying something about grief leading his parents down a sadder path. I tried to get his to change his mind but then he started saying stuff like,"Oh, I would trade my soul for it!" Like seriously, do I look like a human conceived version of the devil? Why would I want that? Well anyways, I didn't really understand him half the time with all the frilly language he had going on, but it sounded like a good enough excuse, so I accepted. Plus the trip to the Human World might potentially get me out of that lawsuit Greg has against me, so I threw him a hew pieces of paper and he started writing.

Interviewer: You know you're not getting out of that lawsuit right?

Linden: Oh come on!

~Attached Letter #1~

~Romeo's Letter~

Dear Mother and Father,

Oh how long has it been since I've called you that. My breast fills with a overwhelming amount of longing and nostalgia. How I wish to see your faces, to feel your warm embraces. My mind fills with countless things I wish to say, so many things I wish to remember. But before you dismiss this as a miss directed letter let me tell you that this is your Romeo. You are skeptical, but you know my print and my way of speech, so please believe.

Now I must tell you his before your hearts rise too high with hope, I am indeed in the land of the dead. Of this world I cannot speak of, for it was one of the vows that I made with one the keepers in exchange for letting me write to you. But oh, what a joy this is for me! Such a pleasurable release from the continual monotony of this place. But nay, I shan't make you worry for me, all I can tell you is that he has allowed me to write this one and only letter to you. So I shall stop using this scarce amount of paper to write about things that I cannot speak of, and use it to write of things that I can.

Above all I must say this, I truly am sorry for the last actions I committed in my life, they are not to be made light of in any way. I have killed two men, both in a moment of passion and rashness. I apologize, yet in my death I have evaded all punishment I would have received. But surely woe is upon me, for even in confession I am evading punishment further. For one cannot reprimand a man that has already reprimanded himself, lest he seem the lesser man. Yet if one is pushed to apology he seems arrogant and unworthy of forgiveness, oh this unending circle of madness!

And let me speak of love, that vengeful yet such needed thing. My mind fills with adoring and hate when I think of it, that beautiful yet cold-hearted thing. For it was love that put me here, love that filled me with an unearthly frenzy of passion and irrationality. Love turned me to this path of destruction. Yet love, after making you perfectly loath it, lures you back. For without love I never would have felt your warm embraces, never would have felt a kiss on my forehead before night.

Yet look at me, here I am raving like a man about such unimportant things, speaking of things of the past when I should be speaking to you, my dear parents. Believe me when I say if given the chance I would have changed it two, three, no ten times over. But alas, time is like a horse with unbridled energy, moving swiftly to its ultimate destination, which not even the keepers know of. Nor are they able to stop it or change its course.

But I have digressed and have used most of my paper on rants. So dear parents, before I run out of room let me tell you this, I want to tell you that you are the best parents in the world. You nurtured me with your kindness and helped me grow. I was truly the most lucky person in the entire world, and I never would have purposefully wanted to give this grief to you. I wish to send my love with my overdue farewells.

Goodbye, forever yours,

Romeo of the house of Montague

~End of attached letter #1~

Interviewer: Continue your story Linden.

Linden: So after he finished writing, I had to shove him off of me before he started to weep in my arms, which would have been downright awful. Well I had to forge a few signatures to get past security, but I eventually got to the Human World. I found the Montague's residence, left the letter on the doorstep and decided to wait and see what would happened. In the morning a woman came out and picked up the letter and went back inside, I wanted to see more so I followed her in. She handed it to a posh looking woman and I immediately knew it was Romeo's mom. She tore open the letter and in reading it her face made all sorts of expressions, from shocked to happy to sad. After she finished she called for Romeo's dad, and showed him it to him, and his face had almost the same expressions as she had, even when she read it for the second time, which surprised me. After they finished they sort of just stood there, shocked like. So this is when I decided to do a little playing around, I went back outside and making sure that they would be able to see me this time, knocked on the door. They answered and I told them that I was one of the keepers that Romeo spoke of, they remained skeptical, but with a simple disappearance and reappearance on my part, they then believed. I told them that if they wanted to they could write one and only one letter to Romeo before I leave, and that letter I would in turn give to Romeo. They agreed and immediately started writing, in the meanwhile I called the maid over and asked for a cafe au lait, which I haven't had in a while mind you.

~Attached letter #2~

~The letter from Romeo's parents~

Dear Romeo,

We have received your letter with great joy, we're glad to know that you're well. And even though we know little of the place that you are in, we feel comfort by your letter. We are disheartened though by the thought that you can could only send one letter and that this cannot be a steady correspondence, but that this is it and we must be satisfied by it. It's like going to a buffet and having to leave after only one bite. How can one possibly have had enough? Oh but we must count our blessings for this surely must be a rare occurrence to be able to draw comfort from the dead.

Oh we just don't know what to talk of, this gracious keeper has allowed us this one letter and we feel that we must try to to write of everything possible. First let us say that if there is any torture for you in that world, we would gladly trade our souls for yours any day. However now we feel that even that would have no use, for then you would mourn for us and wish to trade yours for ours. And oh, what horrible, ugly thoughts enter our brains when we think of this, that if only we could cast some strangers soul in that place to have you back. Oh what a selfish thing to think, for in our greed we would push our sadness onto another family and have them grieve for their lost son.

Oh Romeo, you say that we nurtured and cared for you, yet all we can see is our carelessness. For if we had taken more care we would have seen your love for that Juliet and in understanding that love we would have ended the feud with Capulet. How ashamed we feel now for our fights with Capulet all of which feel so insignificant now that we know the end result. But as you have said no one can turn back time and change their faults.

Ah the keeper grows restless and wishes for us to make haste, but how we wish that we could write to you forever. But as we cannot, let us end with this. Romeo if anyone were to be blessed it would be us, you gave us so many good memories that we have learned to treasure. We want to thank you and ask your forgiveness for our inattentiveness.

Forever with our love,

Montague and Lady Montague.

~End of Attached letter #2~

Linden: After they finished, they handed the letter to me, the lady looked very teary eyed, so to avoid any awkwardness I nodded and quickly left out the door. I got the feeling that they were watching me so I simply made myself invisible to them, a gasp from the house confirmed my suspicions. I didn't go back immediately though but stayed and read the letter, and I just was so confused by the end of the letter. They were asking for his forgiveness yet they knew that they were likely to never get a response, it bothered me. Deciding to see how they would react, I tore a piece of paper from the letter that they gave me and wrote, "You already had my forgiveness. -R" And then I tossed the paper in their direction, making it so that it looked like it fell from the sky. They both noticed it and picking it up, had the most bizarre reaction ever, it was so weird, it was just a piece of paper containing a few words. Yet there they were, clutching the paper and in eachothers arms, they were weeping. Like who does that?

Interviewer: Thank you Linden, that will be all.

~End of Testimony~

~(Transcribed by Sally)~

~End of Report~