Daria's Diary
By: Heero_YuyZ
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Daria it's owned by MTV and some other people.
A/N: This isn't all of her logs, just some important ones.
A/N2: Okay, be gentle, this is my first Daria fic... It's not my forté... PLEASE Review!
May 4th, 2000
Dear Diary… It's been a horrible day. Day after day I can't show my real self. I wish I could. Then maybe I wouldn't feel so alone. Not even Jane understands me. Sure she's a great friend, but she isn't into the stuff I'm into. Tom's the only one who understands me, and he doesn't even understand me that much. God, I can't keep going on like this. I WANT to be closer with my family, with Quinn, Mom, Dad. Maybe if I actually was a better daughter my family wouldn't be so screwed up like this. I mean Dad's such a mess with the family he's near a nervous break down. Mom is a workaholic even if she wants to connect to me, I'm not willing too. Quinn's so superficial, maybe if she had a sister to be with she wouldn't be so attached to looks. I WANT to open up, but my mind won't let me. My heart tells me too, but my mind is thinking ahead, what if they don't want me, what if they don't care about me after all this time of shunning them out of my life. What if I try to be accepted but aren't? I've been drifting farther and farther away from all the people important in my life, who knows if I'll actually be able to come back? I got to go, time for school.
October 23rd, 2002
Sorry I haven't written in a while. But…I just couldn't bring myself to do anything…I mean…With Quinn's death and everything. I'm glad that they put that bastard in the electric chair. Let me explain what happened. Quinn, was playing hooky trying to get to the mall again. But…HE showed up. She didn't know that he had already been to jail. He had been jail for raping 2 women. When she got in he had knocked her unconscious and then drove off to his cabin where he…raped her… Then he left her for dead there, no heat, no food, no water, no communication to the outside world. A man exploring had stumbled across the cabin and found her frozen body… God…Sometimes I wish that it had been me instead of her. Then I could get rid of this feeling inside of me. I must sound like a loon huh. *Smudged from tears* I mean I do want to die… Kinda reminds me when we went to that therapy spa for mom's work. Quinn acted like me and played me suicidal. I just wish I was there for her more. I wasn't there for her in any of the tough times…When Stacy was hit by that car…None of the times… Hell I wasn't even there when the person she had been dating for a year went psycho and tried killing her. I…I can't continue…
January 12, 2003
Boy, life sucks…First Quinn, now Jane. Jane just committed suicide about a week ago. I don't know why. Can't really figure it out. All her suicide note said was that she loves all her friends, but she just didn't feel needed by anyone anymore. I did neglect her a little, I grew farther apart from her. I mean, with Trent gone on his band tour, Tom with me, and me going farther apart from her, I can't think how she felt. I was her last friend and I drifted away from her for my own concerns. Boy I really do have a fucked up life don't I? I can't help but feel like this is my fault. It probably is, I'm here feeling sorry for myself, when her family probably needs comforting. GOD! I'm so self-centered. I'm…gonna go comfort her family.
July 18, 2006
Boy is today a day…Tom proposed to me…My life is finally fixing up. I mean, after all these tragedies…I've started growing closer to my loved ones, since I saw how easily I lost Jane and Quinn, I noticed how easily I could lose them too. But I still go to visit their graves every month. I won't forget the impact and effect they had on my life. I plan on making a memorial in memory of them, starting a program, to get closer to your friends and family. And I'll make it fashionable…in memory of her. Been a long time hasn't it? All this time, huh Diary? I'm so happy…I said yes to Tom of course. I love him. Anyway, that's enough for today, see you on the wedding day Diary.
August 14, 2006
Oh, god, I don't know about this. I think I'm getting cold feet. I mean, I'm going to be spending the rest of my life with him. But I love him so, I know it will work out. I just wish Quinn or Jane were here with me. This will probably be my last entry…I think now that I'm close to someone, I can finally release my emotions in ways other than on paper. I'm so happy today…I'm at a loss for words kinda…It's hard to explain what this is to me except…Perfect… I think I'll give a diary to my kids if I have any… Maybe they won't have a bad as life as me. But I'm glad it turned around. Oh…I got to go, my mom's knocking on the door.
By: Heero_YuyZ
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Daria it's owned by MTV and some other people.
A/N: This isn't all of her logs, just some important ones.
A/N2: Okay, be gentle, this is my first Daria fic... It's not my forté... PLEASE Review!
May 4th, 2000
Dear Diary… It's been a horrible day. Day after day I can't show my real self. I wish I could. Then maybe I wouldn't feel so alone. Not even Jane understands me. Sure she's a great friend, but she isn't into the stuff I'm into. Tom's the only one who understands me, and he doesn't even understand me that much. God, I can't keep going on like this. I WANT to be closer with my family, with Quinn, Mom, Dad. Maybe if I actually was a better daughter my family wouldn't be so screwed up like this. I mean Dad's such a mess with the family he's near a nervous break down. Mom is a workaholic even if she wants to connect to me, I'm not willing too. Quinn's so superficial, maybe if she had a sister to be with she wouldn't be so attached to looks. I WANT to open up, but my mind won't let me. My heart tells me too, but my mind is thinking ahead, what if they don't want me, what if they don't care about me after all this time of shunning them out of my life. What if I try to be accepted but aren't? I've been drifting farther and farther away from all the people important in my life, who knows if I'll actually be able to come back? I got to go, time for school.
October 23rd, 2002
Sorry I haven't written in a while. But…I just couldn't bring myself to do anything…I mean…With Quinn's death and everything. I'm glad that they put that bastard in the electric chair. Let me explain what happened. Quinn, was playing hooky trying to get to the mall again. But…HE showed up. She didn't know that he had already been to jail. He had been jail for raping 2 women. When she got in he had knocked her unconscious and then drove off to his cabin where he…raped her… Then he left her for dead there, no heat, no food, no water, no communication to the outside world. A man exploring had stumbled across the cabin and found her frozen body… God…Sometimes I wish that it had been me instead of her. Then I could get rid of this feeling inside of me. I must sound like a loon huh. *Smudged from tears* I mean I do want to die… Kinda reminds me when we went to that therapy spa for mom's work. Quinn acted like me and played me suicidal. I just wish I was there for her more. I wasn't there for her in any of the tough times…When Stacy was hit by that car…None of the times… Hell I wasn't even there when the person she had been dating for a year went psycho and tried killing her. I…I can't continue…
January 12, 2003
Boy, life sucks…First Quinn, now Jane. Jane just committed suicide about a week ago. I don't know why. Can't really figure it out. All her suicide note said was that she loves all her friends, but she just didn't feel needed by anyone anymore. I did neglect her a little, I grew farther apart from her. I mean, with Trent gone on his band tour, Tom with me, and me going farther apart from her, I can't think how she felt. I was her last friend and I drifted away from her for my own concerns. Boy I really do have a fucked up life don't I? I can't help but feel like this is my fault. It probably is, I'm here feeling sorry for myself, when her family probably needs comforting. GOD! I'm so self-centered. I'm…gonna go comfort her family.
July 18, 2006
Boy is today a day…Tom proposed to me…My life is finally fixing up. I mean, after all these tragedies…I've started growing closer to my loved ones, since I saw how easily I lost Jane and Quinn, I noticed how easily I could lose them too. But I still go to visit their graves every month. I won't forget the impact and effect they had on my life. I plan on making a memorial in memory of them, starting a program, to get closer to your friends and family. And I'll make it fashionable…in memory of her. Been a long time hasn't it? All this time, huh Diary? I'm so happy…I said yes to Tom of course. I love him. Anyway, that's enough for today, see you on the wedding day Diary.
August 14, 2006
Oh, god, I don't know about this. I think I'm getting cold feet. I mean, I'm going to be spending the rest of my life with him. But I love him so, I know it will work out. I just wish Quinn or Jane were here with me. This will probably be my last entry…I think now that I'm close to someone, I can finally release my emotions in ways other than on paper. I'm so happy today…I'm at a loss for words kinda…It's hard to explain what this is to me except…Perfect… I think I'll give a diary to my kids if I have any… Maybe they won't have a bad as life as me. But I'm glad it turned around. Oh…I got to go, my mom's knocking on the door.