I disclaim all quotes/characters/movie moments.
It started with a chair.
Matthew Williams stared at the discarded living room set. Everything about that chair was both wonderful and horrible at the same time. The poor, fading colour just stared back, almost mocking him. Taking another swig of maple syrup (straight from the bottle), and a layer of glaze went over his violet eyes as he thought back to the night this chair was used in to most awkwardness of ways.
The Canadian's silly designed boxers slid awkwardly down his slightly longer legs. The lights dimmed and a soft melody of music played as Matthew walked slowly to the man in the chair. Gilbert sat in that faded chair with a confident, but at the same time, hesitant grin. Matthew could feel his hands trembling; his knees were about to buckle beneath him as he slowly sat on the much naked man.
Matthew froze slightly, his breath brushing Gilbert's ear. Without movement, just taking in the reality of their situation, Gilbert spoke in an oddly soft tone "I've wanted this for a really long time…" his voice startled Matthew a bit.
Barley above a whisper, Matthew said, "I know."
"Fucking Awesome…" at his voice, Matthew ignored the vulgar word. Tilting his head, they started to kiss slow and sensually.
CHIRP, CHIRP, CHIRP!
Loud shrieks brought him back to reality.
"Jeez GilBird! Shut your friggen gob okay?" Matthew snapped unexpectedly. The small ball of yellow fluff scuttled to the back of its cage. Chirping once again, as if testing his patients. Looking back at the chair, he squirted the last of the syrup-y goodness. Feeling the familiar pressure on his lower stomach, Matthew dumped the empty bottles in the trash. Walking a small distance, he ended up at a convenience store.
Hearing the bell, Steve looked at his 'favorite' customer. Seeing where Matthew's beeline was heading, he smirked.
"Well, what's all this then! Back for another test, mate?" the thick Australian accent was almost dripping with amusment. Matthew glared at the man passively. Clutching the box tightly, he walked to the counter.
"I think the first one was defective, the plus sign looked more like a division symbol so I remain unconvinced…" reaching for the bathroom key, Steve snatched it back from his grasp. Dangling the key he said, "Third test today mama bear, your eggo is preggo, no doubt about it." Matthew glared again. Their attention was turned to Heracles Karpusi who stood nearby.
"It's really easy to tell, are your nipples real brown?" He asked in a deadpanned voice. They both ignored the udder creepiness of the question.
"Maybe your mate has got's some bad sperm, knocked'cha up twice." Steve grinned at the sudden horror that flew on Matthew's younger face.
"Silenco! I just drank my weight in Maple Syrup and I got to go pronto!" He shoved his palm out, silently demanding the key. Giving Matthew the key he watched the strawberry blonde head for the lavatories.
"Remember to pay for that! Don't think it's yours just 'cause you marked it!" He shouted purposely. Seeing how the Canadian's face turned a bright pink made him laugh. Inside the small room, Matthew began to hastily unzipping his pants. He pulled out the test, hoping to God that this was just some freak accident and if anything, please let it be his imagination…
Minutes later, Matthew shuffled out of the small bathroom, staring at the test intently. Steve leaned onto his hands in false anticipation.
"So, what's the prognosis, minus or plus?" Steve smirked.
"I don't know, it's not properly seasoned yet…" Looking around, Matthew saw a bag of licorice rope. He took it quickly, "I'll take this too." He doesn't even like licorice that much, but he's already starting to look for comfort food.
Looking at the thin test, he groaned. "Nope, there it is; that little pink plus sign is so unholy…" frustrated, he shook the test.
"That ain't any etch-a-sketch; this is one doodle that can't be undid." The Australian watched as a series of emotions flashed before the boys face. Not bothering to check the cost, Matthew took out a ten from his pocket. Avoiding anymore snarky comments, he took his items and walked out of the store.
Taking angry bites at the hard licorice, he saw the tree in front of his yard. Looking at the rope, he tied a quick, loose noose. Throwing it over a low branch, he stuck his head inside the noose. Pulling it slightly, chocking on his air, he realized he was being overdramatic and this was nothing to die for. Biting into the remaining candy, he stomped into his house.
Once he got to his room, he grabbed the phone that sat on his bedside table. The walls of his room were covered in photos of friends, family and occasional painting. Seeing the recent photo of him and Gilbert, Matthew felt guilty. This whole thing wasn't Gilbert's idea. Why should he have to suffer Matthew's dumb mistake.
Tapping a tune on the plastic, he went through the names of people he could call. Getting pregnant as a male isn't such a common thing, but it does happen, and a boy admitting that he's pregnant is just as awkward as a girl saying she had a bun in the oven as well. Glancing at the hamburger shaped phone, he swung it open and started to dial a number he knew by heart.
"Yo, yo, yiggity yo~!" a drawled slang hummed through his phone.
"Al, I'm at suicide risk." He stated, looking out his blinds to see if anyone was coming home.
"…Mattie?"
Annoyed at the air-headed American, he sarcastically answered, "No it's Morgan Freeman, do you have any bones that need collecting?" Matthew heard snickering from the other line.
"Only the one in my pants…haha." He waited for the laughing to stop.
"Look…I'm pregnant."
"What? Honest to blog?!" Alfreds' serious tone made Matthew feel better about calling him first.
"Yeah, eh, it's Gilberts…" he looked down at his sweater covered stomach, just—Imagining a small little alien in his womb.
Alfred tried to reason with him, "It's probably just a food baby; you have been putting down the Tim Horton's lately…"
"This is not a food baby, I've taken, like, three pregnancy tests and I am foshizz up the spout." He sighed, plopping on his bed. The silence first made Matthew think that Alfred was just absorbing his confession. But then again, Alfred's not that bright.
"How did you even generate enough pee for three pregnancy tests…?" Running a hand through his hair, he groaned. Alfred was not taking this seriously.
"I drank like…four tons of maple syrup—"
"Dude, you're going to die like that."
"Shut it, I'm telling you I'm pregnant and your acting shockingly cavalier…"
Alfred raised an eyebrow, "Not to sound like Feliks…but is this for real? Like, for real for real?"
Sighing, he said, "When have I ever lied to you?"
It was a moment before Matthew heard the other boy start swearing. "Oh my god, oh shit! Phuket Tilit!"
Matthew smiled darkly. "There we go, that was kind of the reaction I was hoping for on the first take."
"So what are you gonna do, Mattie?"
"I know it's against your morals, but I'm probably going to have to call up a clinic or something…"
"…Hey, Do you want me to call for you because I called for Francis last year." He asked politely.
"When did Francis—Nevermind, it's fine, but hey, can I borrow your muscles?"
"For what?"
"Just meet me outside Ludwigs house, alright?"
In unison, they lifted the chair off the now creased lawn. "Ya'know, it's really weird to be carrying the evidence of your rendezvous." Alfred held the single seat as Matthew helped lead him into his giant car. "The fact that it was at Ludwig's house makes me laugh."
Matthew giggled, "Seriously." Chucking the chair into the back, the two boys leaned onto the blue rust bucket. Alfred didn't even break a sweat, unlike Matthew who was panting.
Breaking the silence, Alfred asked, "Was this…just a random thing or…?"
Matthew shook his head, "The act was premeditated, and I mean the sex, not the whole 'Let's Get Pregnant' thing." Alfred shut the lid of his trunk. Holding his leather bomber jacket closer, he asked "So when did you decide you were gonna do Weillschmidt?"
Matthew took a moment to think, "Well, about a year ago in Spanish class…it was a note chain." Smiling at the old memory, Alfred noticed his friends' noticeable glow.
"You love him."
The Canadian kept his smile, but stuttered repetitively. "Ah-We-It's actually very complicated, and I don't feel like explaining it in my delicate state." Matthew couldn't categorize his feelings yet, all he knows is that he wouldn't have done the deed with anyone else but Gilbert.
Alfred grinned mischievously "So what was it like, humping that German's supposedly 'five meters'?"
"Magnificent!" Matthew said quickly. Grinning like a madman.
A/N: I love PrussiaxCanada, and I love Juno.
So I mixed them together, review please.
This is probably the longest fanfiction chapter I've written, haha.