Author's Note:
This is my first attempt at a Homestuck fanfiction, if you have any ideas on what I should write next Homestuck-related, feel free to let me know. Oh! And please do leave feedback, much appreciated if you do!
Nonetheless, I hope you all enjoy!
-CG [carcinoGeneticist] began pestoring TA [twinArmageddons]-
CG: CAPTOR.
TA: what do you need from me now, KK?
CG: WHAT DO YOU FUCKING MEAN? I CAN'T PESTOR YOU FOR NO REASON?
TA: KK.
TA: be 2eriiou2 wiith me.
TA: what have you done two your hu2ktop?
CG: WELL. I MIGHT HAVE THROWN MINE OUT THE WINDOW.
CG: THE FAYGO PIE INFESTED CLOWN I HAVE AS A MOIRAIL IS LETTING ME BORROW HIS.
CG: THAT REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING ELSE THAT NEEDS TO BE HELPED WITH.
TA: let me take a gue22.
CG: MAKARA'S HUSKTOP NEEDS CLEANING.
CG: BADLY.
TA: you know exactly how ii feel when ii need two clean hii2 fucked-up hu2ktop.
CG: SO? YOU DON'T REALLY HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO, RIGHT?
CG: DRAG YOUR ASS OVER HERE BEFORE I LOSE MY SHIT.
TA: fiine.
TA: but only becau2e you a2ked 2O niicely.
CG: STOP USING SARCASM AND I PROMISE I WON'T THROW MY HUSKTOP OUT THE WINDOW PIECE BY PIECE.
TA: agaiin.
TA: fiine.
TA: 2hut up, hold onto your 2hiit, and ju2t waiit.
-TA [twinArmageddons] ceased pestoring CG [carcinoGeneticist]-
You are now a pissed off Sollux Captor.
No one really understands your genius beyond anything other than your ways with husktops. Sure you loved husktops, some would go so far as to say you collect the broken husktop bits.
Which you do, considering you have all these cuts on your arms from falling into the piles. Fuck, your respiteblock looked like a dump, come to think of it. Clean it later, you tell yourself, even though you really won't. After all, it's not your fault that you were surrounded by husktop-abusing assholes who would just say that their husktop wasn't working and you would discover that nothing was wrong other than the minor fact that, you know, they need to install the cleaning systems you sent them. Then again, you can't really blame them when you're the one who sends them the ocassional virus.
Okay, maybe not so ocassional.
Twice a week? No.
Twice every two days? Of course.
You groan and rub your hand over your face when you hear your husktop going off.. again. Let's see who it's from this time, you had a vague idea of who it wa- Yep, it was KK again. Should you bother replying? Well, it depends on what he's sent you this time. More hate? Oh, you're so fucking sick of him. He could fall out the window he threw his husktop out of for all you'd care.
You decide to ignore the message, not even glancing at what it read. Most likely a variation of the whole... "HURRY UP LISPY NERD" thing. Fuck everything. Fuck KK in particular in the metaphorical sense.
Before you know it, you have your white shoe and black shoe on as well as your yellow and black jacket. You pick up any tools you might possibly need to fix the husktop, if it would be a possibility, and a few things to help clean GZ's husktop. Who knows what's on it? Or in it. GZ's been known to make his husktop keyboard stickier than your honey; his fingers covered in slime and spilling Faygo (fucking gross shit) all over it. Maybe you should take some things to clean off the actual keyboard and hope you don't need to take off a few keys from it. You can only hope.
You are now an irritated Karkat Vantas
You stare at the husktop screen and snarl when Captor doesn't respond to your last message. Bastard thinks you don't know he's ignoring you? Well, at least you're a good enough liar to make the lispy buzzing nerd to think you actually threw your husktop out your window. Ha! Like you would do such a thing!
Okay, there was that one time. But it was once and- stopping right there so you don't go all fucking teary over a romance scene, gog damn it! You weren't going to have Captor see you cry. That's basically the end of being taken seriously as a leader.
You still can't believe Captor fell for it. You saying you threw your husktop out the window. Ha! You'll laugh about that later. Maybe. No, you don't laugh. Well, not in front of others. You try not to laugh, mostly because you can hardly stand the sound from others. Who knew laughs could be so annoying? Obviously you did.
Oh look, you are now a pissed off Sollux Captor again
You sigh as you just let yourself into the hive and went up to KK's respit block and frowned as you saw him sitting at his husktop. That he apparently didn't throw out the window. You glare at the back of his head in annoyance.
"Hey douchebag. Where'th your huthktop? Oh, look, it'th right in front of you!" You snap, slapping the back of his head as he jumped to your satisfaction. "Tho, I don't think your huthktop needth any fixing, conthidering it'th all in one piece."
You are now Karkat Vantas again, scared out of your wits
You felt the back of your head get hit and turned around to face a pissed off bipolar lispy nerd known as Sollux Captor and fuck, did he look pissed the fuck off!
"Ha! Tricked you!" You say, trying for a laugh and instead you watch as Captor puts down his things and slowly opens a window. You frown slightly as he does, knowing it's not hot in your respit block. Hell, it's a little warm, but not warm enough to let in a draft through a window. "It's not hot in here, close the window."
Again, you are Sollux Captor, but a lot calmer
You calmly open the window and shrug when KK tells you it's not hot in the room. "I think it'th too warm." You tell him as you turn your head towards him.
"But maybe, without you in the room, it might feel a little cooler in here." You add, stepping back over to KK to slowly lower your red and blue glasses. "You get to thee how your huthktop feelth when it'th falling through the air." You grin as you use your psiioniic abilities to begin lifting the grumpy troll out of his chair and hovering him out the window with a smirk.
YOU ARE A HORRIFIED AS FUCK KARKAT VANTAS
You shout out in surprise when you find yourself hovering outside your window in a ball of red and blue. Damn it, Captor!
"Bring me back in, Captor!" You shout, trying to get out of the ball, failing and snarl as the bastard inside only chuckles and shakes his head. Fucking bullshitter with that stupid-ass smirk on his face.
"Do you want me to drop you, KK?" Captor asked you and you immediately shake your head, looking at the ground that was a fair distance below you.
"Don't you dare!" You shout, screaming slightly when you're dropped from out of the bubble.
You are back to being an amused Sollux Captor
You just dropped down the psiioniic bubble long enough to catch the troll before he could land on the ground and you snicker upon seeing possibly the bodily fluid known as "urine" staining his pants and decide to be nice enough to bring him back through the window. Sure, you received a few curses and other bullshit from KK, but it was all worth it.
Especially after saying:
"KK. Go change your pantth. You fucking wet yourthelf." You say, laughing as KK runs to the bathroom after snatching a pair of his jeans. Yes, your work here is done. You pick up your tools again, put on your glasses, and leave the hive to tell everyone what he did.
Today was a good day.