"I don't know what is wrong with you lately, Rosalie. Haven't your father and I done everything for you?" my mother asked me.

"Nothing, Mom! Nothing is wrong."

"I got a call from the school. You haven't even bothered to show up to class in a week! Where the hell have you been?"

"Nowhere, Mom."

My mom rolled her eyes and swallowed another gulp of wine. She was on her third glass. She only started drinking an hour ago, "It's that girl you've been hanging around. I know she's bad news."

"Fuck off. You don't even know her."
"Rosalie Hale, don't use that language in my house. I may not know her, but I know you. This isn't like you. I don't like it."

I couldn't stand my mother sitting there on our couch, acting like she knew so much about me, "You don't know shit about me."

"Go to your room. Now. You're grounded, understand? You're not seeing that girl anymore."

"You can't stop me." I yelled at her, climbing the stairs to my room.

"Watch me."

Once in my room, I locked the door and pulled out my cell phone.

Hey, can I come over? -R

I waited for a response so long that I nearly gave up hope.

Sure, babe. -B

My mother was still in the living room, but had passed out with a bottle of wine beside her. My father was out, probably screwing his damn secretary. I tiptoed out the back door and started my car. Mom was a light sleeper, but luckily she had drank enough to keep her knocked out.

Ten minutes later I was pulling into Bella's driveway. Her dad waved as I let myself in and got back to watching a game on TV. Bella was in her bedroom, dressed in nothing but an oversized T-shirt.

"You need to talk?" she asked as I got myself settled in her bed, clutching a pillow.

"She's just a bitch. She acts like she cares so much but just passes out drunk every night."

Bella laid down beside me and brushed my hair out of my face, "People are like that. They try to care but get caught up in themselves. Don't be so hard on her.

"She's just a drunk who doesn't care about me. She threatened to keep me away from you."

"Love, you know that won't happen."

She kissed me gently and I melted into her. Bella knew everything I needed. She was such a perfect girlfriend who tried so hard for me. I hadn't even known I was gay until she moved to town and turned my whole world upside down.

Her hands moved lower and unbuttoned my pants. I froze. We had never gone this far before, "I don't know about this..."

She stopped, "Okay, okay. Sorry. We can wait."

"It just freaks me out. I've never done anything with anyone and I just don't want to get that close to anyone right now. I'm not ready."

"It's fine. I don't mind."

I felt like shit. Bella reassured me she didn't mind, but I knew she was going to get tired of me.

I tried to push everything out of my mind as I laid in Bella's arms and fell asleep.

~o~

"Does Bella want to go out to dinner with us tonight?" my mom asked.

"Uh...what?" I asked her, surprised.

"I would like to get to know your friends. It would be nice if you would actually let your father and I in your life. We're not the enemy, baby." she looked at me helplessly.

I felt bad, "I know. It just seems like everything is against me lately. And all you and Dad do is fight and fight. I'm sick of it!"

She hugged me quickly, "Invite your friend. Your father's boss is bringing his son to dinner, but I figured you would like someone you know."

"Okay..."

I don't know what my mom was up to, but I wasn't going to question it. I called Bella and told her to meet us at the restaurant for dinner. She was hesitant, as we were not out to my parents.

"Please? We just can't hold hands or anything...but we can still talk. It'll be boring but I would die without you there. Dad's boss is a creep and his son probably is too."

"Fine, baby."

A couple hours later I was dressed in a red dress and black flats. Dad told me I looked nice as we left the house. It was odd. Dad didn't ever pay much attention to me.

Bella stepped out of her car when we pulled in. Her long brown hair was pulled into a pony tail. She looked down at her outfit worriedly, "I didn't know how to dress."

Her black pants and button down shirt were perfect, in my opinion, "You look fine."

Bella shook my parents' hands, "It's nice to meet you. Rose has told me a lot about you both."

"Uh, Rosalie, honey, who is this?" My dad asked.

"My friend, Bella? Mom told me to invite her."

"I didn't know anything about this." he shot Mom a glare.

"I'm sorry, dear. Let's just go inside and not cause a scene."

Dad apologized to Bella, "I just wasn't informed that you were coming."

Dad's boss and his son were already seated and waiting for us. We were introduced to Mr. Royce King I and his son, Royce II. They both looked like jackasses. Mr. King greeted us warmly and went straight to talking business with my father, but Royce spent more time eyeing Bella and I than talking. We tried to exchange conversation, but it was awkward. My father kept glancing over at me, then leaned over to whisper to my mother. She stood up, "I'm off to the ladies' room. Rosalie, would you care to join me?"

"Uh, sure. Bells, you okay?"

"Yeah..." she said, but she looked uncomfortable. Inviting her was a mistake.

Mom whisked me off to the bathroom with her. She closed the door and sighed, "Will you please make an effort to talk to Royce? It's important to your father."

"Why does it matter?"
"He's looking for a promotion. He just wants to look good for his boss. How about you ask Royce if he wants to go out to a movie sometime? Please? He seems like a nice kid."

I was disgusted, "Mom, it's like you're trying to pimp me out! That's gross."

She forced a laugh, "Rose, honey, it's not like that. You need more friends and Royce is a nice kid."

"We don't even know him."
"Please?"

"Fine, I'll play nice, but you owe me. This is gross, Mom."

Back at the table, Mom tried to start the conversation, "So, Royce, what grade are you in?"

"I'm a senior."

"That's great. You're close to finishing." she encouraged me with a small smile.

"Bella and I are juniors."

"Yeah, it really sucks." Bella added.

My father looked at her disapprovingly.

Mr. King got in on the conversation, "Royce here wants to be a lawyer."

"That's awesome." I smiled. I was good at playing like I was interested, but I couldn't get into it.

"Last I heard, Rosalie wanted to go into fashion. Good thing for a girl to get into." my dad bragged.

Bella and I both stared at him, "Actually, Rosalie always told me that she wants to work on cars."

Mr. King smiled, "That's odd for a girl."

Bella smirked, "She's good."

My mother forced a grin, "That's great, Rosalie. Royce, are you into cars?"

He shrugged, "Not really about fixing them up or anything. It's just not my thing."

Mr. King laughed, "He hasn't the slightest idea how to work on one. Maybe Rosalie here could give him a lesson." He winked at me.

I smiled, "Maybe."

My father took the chance, "How about Royce and Rosalie get together sometime?"

Royce nodded, "Sure."

I agreed, but Bella's expression beside me made me feel like the worst person ever.

~o~

"How could you agree to a date with that creep?" Bella asked when we got to her house. My parents had allowed me a 'sleepover' with my 'friend'.

"It's just to get on my parents' good side. It made my mom happy."

"Last week you didn't give a shit about what your parents thought about you!"

I shrugged, "You don't get it. Charlie is really calm about whatever you do. My parents are just...different. I'll just go out to the movies and that will be it, okay?"

"It's like they're pimping you out! Baby, it's gross."

I ignored the fact that I had said the same thing to my mother, "It's not a big deal!"

"You like him, don't you?" Bella asked. She looked down at the floor.

"No! Not at all. He's not a bad guy, but I'm not attracted to him. I'm just trying to make my family happy. You know, this was the first time in a long time we all went out as a family that didn't end with a fight, or my mom drinking, or my dad leaving? It was just nice."

"It's not your responsibility to make sure your mother doesn't drink! You shouldn't have to do this to make them happy."

"You don't fucking get it!" I yelled.

"Then explain it to me!"
"I'm trying!"

I sat on her bed and cried. She tried to pull me into a hug, but I jerked away. She tried to apologize, but I ignored her. I just wanted my family to be happy and if this was what it took, so be it. I'd go on a fake date with Royce.

~o~

The date wasn't awful. Royce was not talkative and was fairly conservative, but we were able to find common ground when talking about movies and embarrassing stories. He complained about his parents and I complained about mine. He talked about what little he knew of cars and I gladly showed off my knowledge. He couldn't believe any girl as pretty as me understand anything about the 'male world'.

He was a gentleman and he wasn't bad looking. He was funny and didn't talk too much. As far as male companions went, he wasn't the worse. If I was straight, I may have even considered dating him.

However, the night was ruined after he tried to drop me off after dinner and a movie. He walked me to the door and paused before I walked in the door.

"I enjoyed our date. I hope we can do it again."

I paused, "Me too. It was nice hanging out. But Royce, I have something to tell you."

"Aw, you're trying to let me down gently, aren't you?" he smiled.

He really was sort of sweet, "I'm taken, so we can't really go out on another date...I was doing this for my dad."

He nodded, "I know that's why you agreed to coming out with me." He looked bothered.
"I really am sorry, but this date upset my girlfriend so I really can't do it again." I didn't mean to let that slip.

I tried to open the door, but he grabbed my arm, "Girlfriend? What are you, a dyke?"

"Royce, let me go."

"No, you led me on!" he gripped my arm even tighter.

"I didn't do shit! Let me go!"

The door opened. My father towered over us, glaring at Royce, "What the hell is going on?"

Royce dropped my arm, "Nothing, sir. We were just kidding around."

"Make sure you don't touch my daughter, understand?"

He nodded, "Yeah. See you." Royce took off.

My dad looked me over once I got inside, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Dad. Thanks."

"What happened?"

"He just got upset because I don't want to go on another date with him."

"Why not? He's a perfectly nice kid."

"Dad, he hurt me out there. He wouldn't let me go."

"Baby, some boys just take rejection hard. That doesn't mean it was right, but what do you expect? You're a pretty girl. Why don't you want to date him?"

"Because I'm gay!" I yelled. I ran up to my room. Dad was siding with fucking Royce? What the hell was this? This was just wrong.

Neither of my parents spoke to me. I knew my father passed on the news to my mother by the way she stared at me the next morning. It was Saturday. I couldn't hang out with Bella because she was pissed at me for going on the date with Royce. I spent the day hanging out in my bedroom, but by dinner time I was getting frustrated.

"I'm going to Port Angeles!" I called to my silent house. I have no idea if my parents heard me. I got in my car and drove off. I had a close friend who lived in Port Angeles, but over the course of a few months we had drifted apart. I had even deleted Alice's number from my cell.

She wasn't home. I drove all that way and she wasn't even there. I parked my car on the side of the road by her house and walked, trying to clear my head. Everything seemed to be falling apart.

I wandered around pointlessly for an hour, trying to clear my head. By the time I came to, I was really lost. I tried to retrace my steps, perhaps back to Alice's house, but I couldn't. My cell phone was completely dead. While trying to find my way, I heard loud laughter behind me. A group of rowdy guys was walking slowly behind me, talking so loud I could catch their entire conversation.

"-pretty bitch but she was a little dyke."

"You shoulda fucked it out of her."

My blood froze and I turned. It was a mistake. Royce was there, surrounded by three friends.

"Hey, that's her! Rosie, c'mere!" Royce slurred. They were drunk.

I started walking faster, not bothering to look up and down side streets to see if they were familiar. I just had to get away.

They ran after me. I stood no chance against the four of them. I was dragged down a back alley, a pocketknife at my throat. My pants were torn off me and I was silenced by a hand over my mouth. They took turns destroying my life. They hurt me. Oh god, it hurt. They just wouldn't stop. I tried to scream and scream, but my voice failed me and I just cried, my tears mixing with the rain that fell. They laughed and traced a knife down my face, down my stomach, threatening me.

"We fixed you, little dyke."

Royce gave himself another turn. He held the knife at my throat, pressing down enough to cut me.

"Call me when you want another go."

They left me in that alley. I couldn't move. I laid there for ages, bleeding and sobbing, convinced I was dying. No one found me. I had to gather my own broken self and pull on my ripped clothes. Every move hurt me deep inside, but I limped out of that alley. It was so dark that street lights barely cut through the raining night. I don't know how long it took me to find my car through the tears and rain. I dropped my keys and cried when I tried to pick them up. I didn't bother starting my car. I just sat in the driver's seat and stared at the ceiling.

I must have fallen asleep because I woke up to Alice tapping on my window, a bright sun behind her, "Rosalie? Are you okay?"

I didn't roll down the window. I put my keys in the ignition and drove off. I didn't give my mind time to process what had happened. I just drove on auto pilot.

At home, I limped up to my room despite my mom's protests, "Rose? Rose? What happened? Where have you been?"

I locked my door. She pounded at it, calling for my dad. He knocked to, threatening to remove the door. I locked the door to my adjoining bathroom too, and turned the water in my shower on as hot as it would go. I sat in the shower under the spray and cried. Blood ran down the drain. I think my parents gave up trying to get into my room. After an hour in the shower, I got out and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I was bruised badly. A vivid red line decorated my throat. My eyes just looked...dead.

I laid in the bathroom floor and slept.

~o~

"It's time to come out now, Rosalie Hale! You have been in there for two days. Aren't you hungry?" my mom yelled through the door.

I laid in my bed underneath a blanket, trying not to think. I was hungry, but I couldn't face going out of my room.

"Your father and I agreed that if you don't come out by tonight, we will be removing the door, understood?"

I unlocked the door, but didn't open it. I went back to my bed and buried myself under the covers. My mom sat beside me on the bed, "Can you please talk to me?"

I stayed silent.
"I know things have been rough for you, lately."

Understatement of the century.

"Your father told me about what you told him...about being gay. I don't like it, but I accept it. You're still be daughter."

Flashes of Royce in my face, calling me a dyke, came to mind. I burrowed further under my blanket.

"Your father and I are getting a divorce, baby. You won't have to hear us argue anymore."

I felt like I got stabbed in the stomach, "No, no, no, no."

"It's not your fault. We were trying to hold on until you turned eighteen, but I think our relationship is destroying everything. Is this why you're doing this?"

"No!"

"Rose, come out from under your covers. Come downstairs."

She pulled down my blanket. Saw the bruise decorating my face, the cut on my neck, "Oh my god, what happened to you?"

I pulled the blanket back, "Nothing!"

"You can not be getting into fights! What did you do?"

"Nothing!"

"Do I need to take you to a hospital?

"No! I need you to leave me the hell alone! Get out of my life. Just stop!" I sobbed.

I don't know what I wanted. I think I wanted her to stay, to force me to talk to her for once. To reassure me. But she left, closing the door and breaking my heart.

My phone beeped.

Where the hell are you? I don't deserve this. I'm sorry. Just talk to me. -B

I turned the phone off.

~o~

I finally went back to school, two weeks later. My parents had tried to convince me to go before, but I couldn't bring myself to care. I still didn't, I just had to get out of the house. Mom and Dad were arguing more than ever, so loud I could hear them through my blanket barrier. Dad started moving out, taking some of his things. He didn't try to talk to me much, after the initial protests about me skipping class. Mom didn't try much either, resorting to a bottle of wine. I only saw glimpses of her when going to the kitchen for food. It's like she forgot me. It's like Dad didn't even care enough to check on me before he left my life forever. It only took him a week to move out. I don't know where he went. Possibly he moved in with his fucking secretary.

School was hell. I slept through almost every class, then came home and buried myself in my bed. Bella tried to help me, tried to get through, but she gave up.

I'm done with this. I don't want to be ignored anymore. Good luck with your life. -B

I told no one. My life was destroyed that night in a back alley where no one saved me. I wish I could have destroyed Royce the way he did me. My entire life fell apart. My home was destroyed and I drove my own girlfriend away from me. I wasn't even secure in my own body anymore.

I killed myself on a rainy night when I could no longer bear my secret.