Potter's Demon Spawns
By- ainaak ka-lyrra
As soon as Severus stepped into the Great Hall he wanted to turn back around and walk out. Unfortunately Albus saw him, so he had no choice but to take his usual seat at the head table.
The reason, or should we say reasons, for his strong desire to go back to his rooms were Harry Potters spawns of hell. Severus honestly didn't know why the hell Potter hadn't stopped procreating after Lily and Jamie. Jamie was bad enough with how she disturbingly resembled her grandfather James, not only in her hair and eyes but in her attitude as well.
But he knew that the Potters all lived to make his life terrible. Why did Potter have to have not one, not two or three but SIX sons?!. Half of which were the absolute banes of his existence. Severus found it ironic that all the little brats that really caused him trouble were all the younger twins of their particular pairs by the names of Jamie, Harlan, Eclipse, and Python.
Their slightly older counter parts, were actually much more cooperative and were the only people besides their father who could keep him from stringing the little blighters up by their ankles and beating them with enchanted bats.
His gaze fell to Harlan, who was the second oldest boy of the Potter spawns, who was standing on the stage, that they had decided to leave there a decade or two back, with a whole bunch of poor naive Hogwart girls of all ages crowded around the edge trying to touch him as he and his brothers decided to put on a show.
"Ladies" Harlan started, shooting the girls a suggestive look, making them sigh happily and Severus to roll his eyes. "And gentlemen! I present you a song from... Wicked!!" He shouted. Loud cheers rose from the students and several teachers, making Severus roll his eyes again. "Sit back relax and rip our cloths off afterwards!" Harlan yelled grinning at the girls crowded in front of him. Cries of approval rose from them in answer.
Severus noted that Harlan's twin, Harlem, and their younger brother, Solar, looked horrified at their brothers words, Eclipse, and Python looked amused while Panther looked intrigued. Severus now knew one of the reasons why he put up with the Potter spawns... entertainment. With all of the brother conflicting personalities it made very amusing results that usually had him laughing for days, not that he would admit it.
Severus leaned back in his chair and watched as Harlan started singing.
(Rico Suave- By- Geraldo)
" Rico... Suave
Rico... Suave
Seguro que han oído que yo soy educado
Soy un caballerito un chico bien portado
Un joven responsible y siempre bien vestido
Yo no se quien ha mentido
I don't drink or smoke ain't into dope
Won't try no coke, ask me how I do it, I cope
My only addiction has to do with the female species
I eat 'em raw like sushi
No me gustan ternos, mi estilo es moderno
Si me enterno, you me enfermo
Mi apariencia es dura, vivo en la locura
No me vengan con ternuras
So please don't judge a book by its cover
There's more to being a latin lover
You got to know how to deal with a woman
That won't let go
The price you pay for being a gigolo
Rico...Suave
Rico... Suave
There's not a woman that can handle
A man like me
That's why I juggle two or three
I ain't one to commit, you can omit that bit
You pop the question that's itHaber uno, dos, tres, cuatro mujeres
Y la situaci?all?no muere
No es un delito calmo mi apetito
Con un llanto o un grito
So again don't let my lyrics mislead you
I don't love you but I need you
Would you rather have me lie
Take a piece of your pie and say bye
Or be honest and rub your thighs
Rico... Suave
Rico... Suave
(Music Solo)
Well, it's ten o'clock and I'm two hours late
I never said I was a prompt date
But you kept persisting that I meet your parents
Huh, they're going to love my appearance
Ding dong el timbre suena
Tu madre abre, que vieja mas buena
Le digo ¡Hola! Pero no para bola
Que se ha creido vieja chola
Go and serve the food mom
Que tengo ambre
If you don't hurry, me va a dar un calambre
Y usted señor? Why's your chin on the floor?
Sierra la boca por favor
What's this amor, these little huevos?
Esto s?que yo no pruebo
I'm used to good ol' fashioned
Homestyle Spanish cooking
If I try that I'll be puking
Well it's been a pleasure but we got to go
Regresaremos temprano
Cinco, seis, o siete de la mañana
Su hija esta en buenas manos
Rico... Suave
Rico... Suave
(Music Solo)
Rico... Suave
Rico... Suave"
The girls went wild and they all lurched onto the stage. Severus winced, that had to hurt, he mused when the Potter spawns where mobbed.
It was times like these that Severus wished he had a camera.
THE END
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READ THIS!!
A/N - I know I just put a fanfiction yesterday but I can't help myself. I'm still writing out all of the chapters but then I realized that for me to continue Dark Realization, I need Dark Celebration and my friend has the book and I haven't had any direct contact with her in months, so your going to have to wait a little for the sixth chapter to come out for that one.
Fun Fact- This one-shot and Asshole are both apart of the LBT universe which is apart of a trilogy. There is going to be a prequel to LBT, and a sequel, and several short spin offs.
Also if you want to hear the song, go to my profile.
Please review and tell me what you think.