It was just for a moment but Sophie swore that it was her. And her hands were shaking.
The only reason that they had been in town to start with was because her girlfriend would not quit moaning.
"But Soph all I have to wear is the "Sally" shirt!" she had said over a plate of eggs.
"Well maybe if you actually did your washing then you'd have more options" Sophie scolded.
"What?! I thought you liked me in this" she smirked. "In fact I could wear even less…" she arched her eyebrow.
"Stop it" Sophie warned even as the side of her mouth turned up in a slight grin.
"Neither of us is working today" Maddie said slyly. "Who says we even have to wear clothes at all?" she deadpanned with a cheeky grin.
"Because my mum is coming over later and I've already had her walk in on me in bed with a girl once" she said as she got up to put her plate in the sink. "Not an experience I want to repeat" she said as she went upstairs to shower.
She had just started applying the shampoo when she heard the bathroom door open.
"That better be you Maddie because otherwise I'm going to start screaming" she shouted.
Maddie poked her head in the shower curtain.
"Don't scream" she said still clothed. Sophie turned to face her seeing Maddie check her out and then smirk.
"What is it? Or did you just want to perve on me?" Sophie said annoyed.
"No, although that's a side benefit. I've just had the best idea: Let's go into town. We can get that shiny top you wanted and I'll let you pick me out something" she said angling for a better view without getting wet herself.
Sophie thought about it for a minute. An easy respite from the street for her and Maddie didn't sound like too bad an idea. Although they didn't get too much trouble on the streets of Weatherfield, it was still nice to get away. And she had been wanting that top from Top Shop for a long while…
"All right! Now get out of here unless you're planning on joining me" Sophie laughed as she turned around to get the shampoo out of her hair.
"Well if you insist" Maddie smirked as she quickly pulled her tank top over her head.
So they had finally set off for a few hours in town. They didn't have much money between them, but it was still nice to just be alone with each other. Sophie had been dealing with the sniggers and whispers for a long time so it didn't bother her. However Maddie was still not completely at ease with showing affection in public. It was hard to remember that Maddie was only 17 and not used to having a girlfriend. It frustrated Sophie sometimes but she tried to stay patient.
As they walked down Canal Street at least Maddie had started to relax. She even took Sophie's bags as they looked out for a pub that they'd visited before.
"Maddie what if they won't let you in?" Sophie fretted.
"Stop fretting. They did before" Maddie smiled.
"Yeah that was before I knew you were only 17" Sophie whispered.
"Fooled'em once. I'll do it again. Just watch" she challenged Sophie confidently.
Normally, Sophie found this cheeky side of her girlfriend well hot, but today she was not having it. She was about to open her mouth to protest when she saw something that stopped her in her tracks. Or rather someone.
It had been like seeing a ghost from the past floating past you. A blonde haired woman in skinny jeans and a black leather jacket crossed the street right in front of them. Sophie felt her legs stop dead as her head turned to follow the woman as she got into a car that was parked on the street. Her throat dried up and her hands started to shake.
It couldn't have been Sian. Could it?
"Sophie! Are you alright?" Maddie kept asking again and again. Her voice got higher and higher as she got more and more worked up. Sophie caught her breath that she didn't even know that she had been holding. Looking to the ground she collected herself. She had felt Maddie grab one of her hands and started pulling her somewhere. She turned back to see where her girlfriend was taking her.
It was a pub. Sophie didn't stop her. Suddenly a drink didn't sound so bad. They settled in a booth.
"Are you all right? Just say something" Maddie pleaded.
"Yes I fine. Just thought I saw someone is all" she said breathlessly.
"Well, you're white as a sheet Sophie. I'm going to get you some water" she got up to go to the bar. Sophie stopped her.
"Stop! Stop" Sophie got some money out of her purse. "Just get us a pint eh? If they won't give it to you just come back" Sophie said giving her a few pounds.
As Maddie went to the bar, Sophie collected her thoughts. She wasn't really worried about Maddie's ability to chat up the bartender. The girl had quite the silver-tongue if motivated. Since they had gotten together, Maddie had curbed some of her worst habits. Drinking being one of them, mainly because Sophie didn't like to get wrecked.
At the moment, though, alcohol seemed like a good way to dull the feeling going on in her head. And heart.
It wasn't like Sophie hadn't imagined what it would be like to see Sian Powers again. She had run the scenario a million times in her head. Sometimes it was smooth, and other times she got slapped. Still their love affair had ended a long time ago, and Sophie thought that she had moved on. So much had happened between then and now. And she'd never change any of it.
But she did miss having a best friend. And if Sian was willing to understand then maybe they could have that kind of relationship again. Or at least some kind of relationship.
She hadn't told Maddie much of these thoughts. Her girlfriend had asked her a few times about it. Digging for past history, Sophie suspected. Sophie tried to be as honest as she could with the girl, but still it was hard. Sometimes Maddie could be insecure with her older girlfriend. Emotions were a thing that she struggled with allowing to show. Deep down Sophie suspected that she was waiting for the day when Sophie would leave her-like everyone else in her life. All Sophie could do was make her believe that she was staying with her. No matter what.
Maddie brought two tall pints of lager to the table and threw down the change on the table. Sophie looked up at her and grinned as she slid in beside her.
"See I told you I'd get it" she pecked her on the cheek. "You're looking better. What happened back there?" she asked after taking a sip from her glass.
Sophie took a large gulp of her pint then set it down in front of her. She struggled with what to say and then just decided to be honest.
"I thought I saw an old ex on the street out there" Sophie said quietly.
"Oh" Maddie exhaled loudly. "Well you've only dated two women right, so it must of been…" Maddie worked it out like a mathematics problem.
"Yep" Sophie confirmed and took another large gulp of her glass.
"Well we could go back and find her. Did she go in a shop or summat?" Maddie offered.
"No. She went into a car, probably long gone" Sophie surmised.
Maddie looked around awkwardly. Neither of them said anything in a deafening silence for a few minutes. Sophie tried to pull together how to explain herself. It wasn't like she wanted Sian back. Still she wouldn't mind some form of forgiveness for what she had done.
With hindsight she could see their relationship falling apart, and she was a different person now. And once you change, well you can't change back.
Naked in bed one night, Sophie had turned to her and said softly "I'm not perfect, I know the pain that I can cause. But I'm not going to hurt you Maddie. I know what it's like to destroy the best thing that you have. It's not a thing that I want to feel again."
Still she knew that Maddie considered her "Saint Sophie" no matter how many times Sophie tried to dissuade her.
"I'm sorry" Sophie turned toward her girlfriend.
She could see the uncertainty in Maddie's eyes as they sat there. Her girlfriend didn't deserve this. Sophie thought about how far they'd come and her chest warmed. Maddie had come a long way from being the cheeky girl who had an insult for everyone. Sophie would have never in a million years expected to feel that flutter in her chest again. Sometimes she drowned in it thinking about her girlfriend.
"It just knocked me for six is all" she squeezed her hand trying to reassure her.
"I don't blame you. She was proper gorgeous" Maddie sighed.
"Wait…" then Sophie remembered that Maddie had found a picture at her mum's house.
"Sophie" Maddie started, then she gulped hesitating. She looked away for a moment. Sophie worried about what was coming, but she knew to wait till Maddie was ready.
"If she were here, you'd pick her wouldn't you?" Maddie said hesitatingly. Tears were threatening to fall. Sophie put her hands on her cheeks, looking straight into her eyes.
"Don't be daft" Sophie smiled. "She's very important to me. Without her, I wouldn't be who I am. But I'm here with you" she leaned in. As their lips touched, Sophie could feel the tension drain away. After a few moments she felt Maddie's lips relax as they opened slightly accepting her tongue.
She smiled as she heard a slight cough that was a little too forced to be natural. She laughed as their lips parted. Looking at the booth beside their own, she saw an old man in a Man City jersey. Maddie's face was adorably flushed. Catching her breath, Maddie looked in the direction that Sophie was turned.
"Hey old man! Don't you see where you are? Mind your own" she said laughingly as they snuggled up together in the booth.