Disclaimer: I don't own True Blood or Harry Potter!
A/N: A new fic... while I know I should not write another one, the idea for this one refused to leave me alone so I just had to write it.
It has not been beta read, and because english is only my second language there will most probably be some mistakes. Please tell me if you notice some.;)
Anyway, enjoy!
On the Edge of the Abyss
Prologue
He had always had several expectations as to what existed inside the veil. Maybe a world unlike anything humankind had ever seen, or nothing at all but death. Though whatever he had imagined, a long journey though darkness had not been it. When he thought about it, he should have known better than to use it as an escape for his situation at the time. Really, he should have known better than that.
The veil consisted of darkness. No, 'darkness' was the wrong term for the state of the world inside the veil. 'Nothingness' was a much better expression to define just how it appeared in Harry's eyes. It was a vast area of nothing. The size was indefinite; there was no feeling of time and no temperature whatsoever. If Harry had not been aware of his own body, to a degree, then he would have thought he was dead.
It was suffocating, consuming and after a while Harry could feel his own personality slowly slip away. The person known as 'Harry' - was that his name? - was withering away. Evaporating from the body it had inhabited, and he lamented his inability to restrain it inside himself.
In the beginning, he had cried and screamed for help, but he had soon understood that there was no salvation in the godforsaken place inside the veil. Slowly as time, or what felt like time, passed by a numb feeling consumed him. And while he probably should have feared the indifference that overtook him, he could not muster up the strength to care.
The most peculiar thing about being in the veil was that the loss of 'Harry' did not indicate that he lost his memories. No, it was more of a loss of connection to the personality he had associated with himself. The opinions and emotions connected with certain memories were wiped clean. The result of this was a huge amount of memories he felt no connection with; it was quite peculiar.
He - Harry? - closed his eyes, even though he knew he saw the same darkness whether he had them closed or open. He was just a part of the darkness and nothing he did would make any difference.
—øØø—
He was no longer sure who he was, or who he was suppose to be. Inside his head, there were memories belonging to a man he felt no connection to. It felt as though he was watching a movie without engaging in its contents, but unlike a movie he had no choice but to watch.
He could not look away, no matter how hard he tried. No matter how much he wished to forget it. He did not desire them. They were disturbing to watch, and he felt pain for whoever had experienced them even if he was only a spectator.
Only a bystander that held no connection to the memories.
Only an observer.
Nothing more.
—øØø—
When the atmosphere changed in the land of nothingness, he - whoever he was - felt it at once. The change brought with it a peculiar feeling of being lowered into water - cold and heavy water.
He exhaled and inhaled, eyebrows furrowing as the uncomfortable sensation swept over him. As time went by the feeling increased, and - like any sane being - he tried to move away from it. Though such a thing was impossible; he knew that. After all, he had been in a constant fall for years, maybe even centuries, where the only direction he could move was downwards - which was far from voluntarily.
The darkness or nothingness, in the veil, altered, attaining a greenish colour like a spruce's needles. It tightened around him; a bone crushing pressure that enveloped his body and refused to let go. Through it all the never ending fall never halted, it only continued throughout all the changes inside the veil.
Then suddenly he was floating completely weightless, but only for a moment, before he felt a harsh pull in his chest. It was similar to having a rope attached to his torso, where all his weight was hanging from a thread and now, unlike earlier, there were absolutely no movement. Completely still, he was dangling like a doll suspended by manipulating ropes and threads.
Then it wrenched him upwards, slowly but surely. He was about to inhale in shock as a very harsh tug pulled him upwards, but as soon as he opened his mouth water streamed down his throat, into his lungs. Suffocating from the sudden lack of air, he clutched his throat, body thrashing around in what he now understood to be water. He was drowning. Was this really how it would end?
He screamed, but only small air bubbles escaped - no sound but the one in his own head. Dragging his hands through the water, he tried to find a way to a surface he hoped existed. Though it was impossible to see anything through the greenish water, and which direction was up, or down for that matter, was unknown. He would die here if this continued. Confused, scared and alone.
Never the one to give up - who never gave up? - he continued to struggle, trying to find salvation. And just as he thought he would lose consciousness, and disappear into the darkness, his hand broke through the surface, and humid summer air hit his cold skin. Not seconds later he managed to inhale the fresh air. He swallowed air greedily, eyes blurry and unable to really see his surroundings. He coughed water up from his lungs.
After a few more moments of disorientation and panicked whirls back and forth in the water, he finally accomplished to look at his surroundings. At first nothing made sense. It was as though he was looking at something he had never seen before and had no idea how to understand it. He had been in a world of nothingness for such a long time, that when he finally saw something that normally would make sense it became confusing and unknown.
Blinking in shock, he closed his eyes forcibly as he inhaled. When he opened his eyes again, it made a bit more sense. He was in something similar to a lake, enclosed by trees, though what type of tree it was he could not say. Only a few meters from his current position there was a small wharf with a ramp. Not wishing to remain in the uncomfortable water that had tried to steal his life only minutes earlier, he clumsy swam towards it. When he gripped the ramp, he breathed relieved out. He only managed to hoist himself up on the wharf before he collapsed.
The summer heat felt comfortable against his naked body. It had been so long since he had felt anything, so everything was welcome. Though the experience of almost drowning was not something he wished to repeat, ever.
He sighed as he glanced up at the sky. It was a completely clear night sky with millions upon millions of small stars, so beautifully calm and so far away that he could only dream about touching them. Exhaling shakily, tears began to gather in his eyes as emotions came bouldering inside his chest. Every kind of emotion returned to their rightful place after having abandoned him for such a long time. Finally, he felt whole; at peace.
This world, wherever he was, was real. It had trees, stars and water he could drown in; it was spotted and dangerous but that made it so incredibly wonderful. He was alive and not just an empty box with memories.
Harry - that was his name - stretched his back and became aware of the pain racking though his body. It was wonderful to be alive, but no matter how much it filled him with happiness it was also painful. Harry rolled over on his stomach and tried to push himself up from the hard wooden wharf, but failed miserably. There was no strength in his muscles and no matter how many times he tried, he only managed to push himself few centimetres up from the wharf.
Harry sighed, banging his head painfully against the wooden planks. Had he really managed to escape from the veil only to die alone on a fucking wharf?
It felt ridiculous that this was how it would end, but he did not exclude the possibility that fate hated him enough to let him die at the current spot. Fate had certainly fucked with him before, so who could say it would not do it again?
Harry closed his eyes in resignation, knowing that he would not move anywhere without help. The summer heat caressed his body and after a while of relaxation sweeping through his body, he fell into a light slumber. He was woken up by the soft sound of branches snapping. Blinking tiredly, he glanced towards the area he was certain the sound originated from, though unfortunately his current position hindered him in seeing what it was.
More branches were snapping, and now he was convinced that the creator of the annoying sounds was a human being. Someone was closing in on his position. Harry felt hope blossom in his chest, but it died out moments later. What if, whoever it was, had hostile intentions?
He swallowed forcibly, closing his eyes in worry. But when he thought about it if the person wished to hurt him then there was nothing Harry could do. Unable to move and fight back. His fate laid in the hands of whoever it was. The footsteps seemed to halt somewhere in the woods before they quickened, almost running onto the wharf and towards Harry's body.
"What the fuck!" He heard a male voice exclaim in shock. Harry glanced up towards the voice in curiosity. He had been right; it had been a man, but it was rather difficult to see his appearance in the darkness.
The man kneeled down beside Harry as he threw off his thin summer jacket to throw it rather hurriedly over Harry's naked figure. A gentle hand lifted his head up on the man's lap, and not long after a warm hand brushed over his neck, checking his pulse.
"Are you alright?" He asked rather worriedly, and Harry opened his mouth to respond ironically that - he was just fucking fine, could he not see that? - but the words got caught in his throat. His breath hitched and he began to caught violently.
The man shifted, probably about to give Harry a powerful slap on the back so that whatever had gotten caught in his throat would be coughed up. Harry shook his head, and fortunately after a few more coughs he managed to breath normally. It had probably only been some water.
"Can you hear me? Are you alright?" The man asked and now that the man close to him, Harry managed to see him clearly for the first time. His saviour - saviours did not exist - was a young man, probably in his early 30's, with warm grey eyes and shaggy brown hair.
"What's your name?" He questioned, eyes bright with concern.
"I feel like shit." Was the only words Harry managed to bite out. Shit, he felt horrible, like the world was moving in the wrong direction. Dizziness overcame him, and he closed his eyes in a futile attempt to hinder the growing nausea. He clutched the man's jeans.
The world was vanishing into darkness. Harry sobbed as he lost sight of the trees and the lake, he was losing consciousness. The last thing he was aware of was the annoying beeping sounds of a phone, and the man's panicked voice.
For a change, he welcomed the darkness, knowing he would be able to escape it sooner or later.
— øØø —
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