Survivor, a harry potter fanfic

Survivor

This story is a comedy about the Harry Potter characters stuck in a minivan! The one who stays in the minivan the longest wins. The ones who leave lose. The victims are;

Harry
Ron
Hermione
Fred
George
Voldemort
Bellatrix
Dumbledore
Sirius

Day 1-

Head Person: Okay everyone get in! You know the rules, anyone who comes out of this minivan, loses. Last one sitting wins!

*Everyone piles in*

Head Person: Good Luck....*Walks away*

2 hours later-

Harry, Ron, and Hermione: I'm bored!
Fred and George: Tell me about it!
Voldemort: Well, since you're bored, I shall kill you...
Dumbledore and Sirius: 'EXPELLIARMUS!'
*Voldemort gets blasted out of the minivan and loses*
Harry: Well, that was fun. What next..

Day 5- Everyone is getting restless. Twice Bellatrix tried to beat up Hermione, while Harry ate so much candy that he threw up on Ron and they got into a fight. Dumbledore had to many lemon drops and said, 'I love you' to Sirius, and he switched spots with Ron.

Harry: I NEED MORE CANDY!
Ron: No you don't! You just threw up all over me! ARE YOU CRAZY!
*Dumbledore gave Harry some lemon drops.*
Bellatrix: Ugh! I surrounded by these idiots! I'm out of here! *She leaves with tiolet paper stuck to her pants*
Sirius: Ugh, I'm bored...

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Day 14- Everyone is starting to eat pieces of the car. Also they are starting annoy each other and start having hallucenations.

Fred: I like eggs...I like eggs...
George: Oh SHUT UP ALREADY!
Fred: I like eggs...
Harry: Ugh...I don't feel well
Hermione: Well, thats because you pigged out on candy the past 9 days!
Dumbledore: I like Lemon drops...
George: Great! Now he's going crazy!
Sirius: ALL OF YOU SHUT UP!

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Day 21- Lets just say Sirius wants to kill himself...

Sirius: Ugh! I wanna kill myself!
Dumbledore: Oh Sirius, don't talk like that!
Fred: I like bacon...I like bacon
George: Oh great now it's bacon?! What happened to eggs?!
Fred: I like eggs...and bacon...
George: UGH!!!!! *runs out of minivan crying like a baby*
Harry: What a baby!!
Ron: Tell me about it! Wizards cheese anyone?
Hermione and Harry: Wizards cheese?
Ron: yeah, instead of chess men you use pieces of cheese!
Harry: lets play!!
*Ron takes out set and they play!*
Dumbledore: Lemon drop anyone?

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Day 29- I have nothing to say...

Fred: MONKEYS!
Harry: What?
Fred: There are monkey's outside. Aww...how cute...
Ron: okay...you have gone crazy
Hermione: Thats not possible...I think your hallucenating! I have read it some where in Hogwarts, A History
Sirius: Maybe Madame Pomfrey should take a look at him.
Dumbledore: .....
Harry: THERE AREN'T MONKEYS OUTSIDE! GET A HOLD OF YOUR SELF FRED!
Fred: Yeah there is! I see two of them kissing. Aww.....
Dumbledore: .....

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Day 36- Still have nothing to say....

Harry: Oh my god, I see a baby kitten outside!!
Ron: Thats not a cat, it's the head person!
*head person comes in*
Head Person: Okay everyone, it is time to vote one person out of this minivan. You have now been in here for 36 days, just to let you know...*hands out paper*

10 minutes later...

Head Person: Okay hold up your papers!

Harry: kittens
Ron: Fred
Hermione: Fred
Dumbledore: Lemon Drops
Sirius: Dumbledore
Fred: Eggs and bacon!

Head Person: Fred, you have been voted out of Survivor, goodbye! *Fred disappears in thin air and head person leaves laughing hystarically*

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Day 42- You don't want to know...

*Harry and Ron fighting over a wizards cheese piece*

Harry: Give it to me, it's mine!!
Ron: No, it's mine!!
Harry: no it's MINE!
Ron: GIVE IT TO ME!
*They tug at it one more time and it rips. Ron and Harry look at each other, and they start beating up each other*
Hermione: Guys, stop!
Harry and Ron: NO!! *Hermione backs off*
Dumbledore: Guys, Ms. Granger is right.
Harry and Ron: Oh shut up!!!
Sirius: *snores cause he is sleeping and yelling out 'Casper the friendly ghost' which causes Ron and Harry to stop fighting.*
Harry, Ron, Hermione and Dumbledore: Huh??

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Day 51- ......

Sirius: *sleeping* CASPER, DON'T DIE! *Wakes up to everyone staring at him*
Harry: Why in the world are you screaming out Casper?
Sirius: Because he's my best friend, and he's right behind you! *He points to nothing behind Harry*
Ron: Huh? Sirius what are you talking about?
Dumbledore: I like lemon drops...I like- hey theres a donkey out side eating a banana!
*Everyone turns towards the window, see nothing, then turn towards Dumbledore and throw him out of the minivan!*
Hermione: Do that again!!! Do that again!

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Day 64- Like I said, Hermione is going crazy!

Hermione: *crying* I want my mommy!!
Harry: I want you to shut up!
Hermione: NO!!! I want my mommy! *Leaves minivan, crying*
Ron: Who would have think it?
Sirius: Its thunk, not think!
Ron: Blah, blah, blah...
Harry: I WANT CANDY!!!
*Harry looks aruond the car and sees cat food*
Harry: Oooh, chocolate covered raisins!!
*Takes a piece and eats it*
Ron: Harry, you know thats cat food right?
Harry: It is? *looks at the bag* Oh well! *eats more.*

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Day 71- Ron and Harry are fighting over the cat food. Sirius is crying because Casper died, and lets just say things are about to get more out of control as they battle to be the last one in the minivan.

Harry: I like kitties!
Ron: I...I...ugh! I don't know what I like! *Starts crying*
Sirius: Oh shut up! You guys are acting like total idiots. *slaps both of them* GET A HOLD OF YOURSELFS!!
Harry and Ron: Do that again!
*Sirius rolls his eyes and slaps them*
Harry and Ron: Thanks!

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Day 79- So who wins?

Harry: Ugh...Ron?
Ron: Shut up!! I don't want to hear it!
Sirius: Both of you shut up!
Harry: NO! Look! *he points to the ignition*
Ron: Theres keys in there!
Sirius: How come we never noticed before?
Ron: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
All: ROAD TRIP!!
*Sirius jumps in the driver's seat and turns it on*
All: Whoo!!!
*Drives off*

Head person: HEY COME BACK HERE!!!

All: YEAH WE WON!! LETS GO TO VEGAS!