Georgie was sat on the windowsill, staring into the streets, waiting for something to happen. She didn't know exactly what was going to happen, but she had a vague idea. All she knew was that this was the end of something big and the start of something ugly, yet strangely she felt absolutely nothing. No rational emotion was visible to the surface of Georgie's face. No fear, no sadness, no anger. Nothing. Just a kind of nauseating anticipation as she waiting for something to happen. She heard the keys rattle against the door and automatically her fists clenched and the air seemed to force it's way backwards into her lungs.
"Here we go." She whispered under her breath.
Lisa walked in from her seminar, dressed like a university student should be dressed. Her clothes were old and worn to shreds but still had the air of being warm and safe. Everything about her, even down to the spring in her step and the way her blonde ponytail bounced with the slightest movement of her head, seemed to scream "high aspirations." Introductions as always with Georgie, were brief.
"Why aren't you at work?" Lisa asked seriously, although she knew this pattern and damn sure knew the answer. Suddenly Georgie was unable to look at her and she drew her grey eyes back towards the dim orange glow of the street lights. She licked her lips and pulled her fringe behind her ear.
"I got fired." She said nonchalantly, but the sound of her friend groaning made the seriousness of her situation more evident.
It wasn't like it hadn't happened before, but that was exactly the problem. It'd happened too many times before.
"Again? How we gonna afford heat this week?" Lisa asked burning a glare into the side of Georgie's head. Georgie shrugged. She didn't know how else to answer. Those were the last words they exchanged for an awkward few minutes.
The silence was beyond uncomfortable, but there was no way to break it. Lisa leant against the wall her head tipped backwards and her eyes tightly closed as if she could wake up from a dream. Lisa was only in her first year, and she was already struggling financially, and it was only getting harder. 'Cause when Georgie moved in a year ago, she promised she'd get a steady job to help her out, to pay her way to make sure that they both had enough money to live on. But Georgie couldn't keep a job for too long, and that could leave them both starving for weeks while Lisa desperately attempted to scrounge more money from her parents.
If Lisa lived on her own the bills she desperately needed to pay would be halved, her income would be steadier, overall she'd probably be much more relaxed and able to live her life happily. But if Lisa lived on her own she'd be racked with guilt for years, because Georgie had nowhere to go. Lisa's stomach flinched and she looked over at her friend desperately, needing her to do the selfless thing. Lucky for her, Georgie knew exactly when to say when.
"It's okay Lisa." She muttered monotonously, compressing a sigh.
"What do you mean?" She knew exactly what she meant. Georgie closed her eyes and pulled her knees closer to her chest, trying to make herself look as small as she felt.
"I'll go back to live with my parents for a while, get some money together and sort myself out." She clenched her teeth.
"You can't do that." Lisa said automatically, purely out of best friend duty. Although, deep down, she wanted her to do just that.
"It's fine, I probably should've been going back to visit them sometime anyway.." She gulped. In one angry motion Georgie swiftly brushed her hands under her eyes, which had became glazed over with a sheen of wet. Just that one quick movement, and suddenly Lisa changed her mind completely. They'd struggle through the money problems together, they'd live through it, it wouldn't kill them. She thought then, there was no-way she could send her best friend back there. No way. She'd rather die first.
"You can't go back there." She shook her head , her ponytail shaking with her, her eyes beginning to water too. Only in her eyes, the blue glistened with life and emotion and her whole face seemed twisted in anguish. Georgie's face stayed dull, but the emotion showed through her eyes. She wasn't a pretty girl, her face was small and plain and accompanied with shoulder length brown hair which was always messy. There was always make-up smudged under her eyes and pen all over her face and hands, and not one solitary feature that gave her face any kind of character. Her eyes, like the rest of her were grey, but they were different. They weren't particularly beautiful, or easy to look at, but they were special. Her heart was shown in her eyes, every fleck of emotion she hid became apparent in her eyes. If you stared long enough at them, you could practically guess her life story, and that was Lisa's downfall. That's how Georgie always managed to stay protected, to have some kind of safety net, anyone with a heart would look in her eyes and know for sure she needed to be helped.
"I can't send you back there." Lisa shook her head again. Georgie put her hand on hers in a comforting manner, ironically considering she was the one most likely to suffer. She leant forward and stared directly into Lisa's eyes.
"My things are packed." She said in a tone just above a whisper.. "I'll call them tonight. Okay? This isn't your fault. I promise you that, and thank you. Thank you, for everything you've given me over the past year. I know I don't always show it but I really really appreciate it." Lucy found herself nodding, transfixed, but almost as quickly as it had happened it ended. Georgie leant back against the window and stared out at the streets again, pulling out a packet of cigarettes from her shirt pocket and sticking her final one behind her ear. Lisa still stood there her insides churning and the impact of her guilt already beginning to settle noticeably on her face.
"I thought you'd quit?" Lisa asked. "To save money and all that?" Georgie smirked.
"I had, but I think under the circumstances I'm entitled to smoke, don't you?" Lisa nodded and stayed silent. Georgie was back to herself again, unloving and unemotional. Although that quick moment seemed to make even the most sarcastic remarks to be in some way an act of love.
"I'll um.." Lisa started pointed towards the door. "I mean I have too.." Georgie carried on staring down at the grey pavements on the streets, pretending not to listen to what Lisa had to say. "Thanks too.." she finished before walking out their flat.
Georgie stayed sitting there until she saw Lisa walk underneath her, huddling into her hoody deeper to feel its warmth. Then she got up, walked into her bedroom where nothing had been packed and started the soul crushing process of gathering everything she owned into a not nearly big enough suitcase. She wasn't sure exactly where Lisa had gone, she considered maybe a lecture of some kind but then shook her head as she realised it was ridiculous for her to want to come home for only a few minutes, knowing it wouldn't be worth it. In reality she knew Lisa had just gone so she didn't have to watch her best friend leave her house, like she had as that rebellious teenager from 2 years ago.
Eventually everything was packed and she'd said goodbye to the place, although there wasn't much of a connection with it. It was always just a place, a bed. She smirked as she left it. There was noway she would come back here, she could feel it her bones. It was the same sensation she'd felt when she'd left home the first time, and there was still a very strong nagging part of her telling her she couldn't go back there now.
Georgie left the apartment and walked into the streets she'd stared at so intently for the longest time. She stood under the vulgar orange street light and scanned the roads for some kind of sign to direct her as to where to go now. She stood there for five minutes in the freezing cold while the wind bit at her, shaking her to the core and tensing her muscles; Waiting for something to happen. Nothing did but she knew that this was the start of something very, very ugly. She shrugged to herself, and took the cigarette from behind her ear. After lighting it with shaky fingers, she walked out of time, in no particular direction, wondering what the fuck she was going to do next.