disclaimer: I don't own Castle the show. There have been characters added though.

A heart to hold
chapter 1

Castle's loft

Castle could feel the blood seeping through his shirt. He had just been shot but he didn't know how bad. More gunshots rang out. He turns his head and sees Caleb hit the wall and sink down, dead. He moves his head in the other direction and sees his wife, Kate Beckett, standing there. Blood was now soaking her shirt as she to collapse on to the floor. Grimacing in pain he slid across the floor to his wife who was also sliding towards him. If I die right now he thought, I want to die holding her hand. He finally made it to her and grabbed her hand. "Castle, Rick, I love you." he heard her say.

"I love you too Kate always have." Then his eyes rolled back into his head, he couldn't see a thing, he couldn't feel a thing. Was this death?

moments later...

"Richard!" Martha calls, from the den area of the loft. When he didn't respond she calls out again. "Richard." This time a little louder. She couldn't figure out why he didn't respond to her calling his name. "Oh Rich-ard," she tries one more time dragging out his name.

Castle began to twists his head some, lifting it up off his desk. "Yes, mother, why are you so loud?"

"Cause you didn't hear me, son." Castle blinks his eyes. "Your ex-wife is here."

"Which one?"

"Gina. Did you forget you alimony check again?" ignoring his mother's question on why his ex-has come by Castle looks down at his hand. He finds out he was carrying a pen. "Must have fallen asleep." He shakes his head again. I don't remember anything. The last thing I remember was...he rubs his fingers, hey wait where's my wedding ring. It's not on my finger, I hardly ever take it off. Oh, no Kate's gonna kill me. What am I saying? I don't even know a Kate. I have been working too hard. He places the pen in the pen holder on his desk and slides his chair back to get up. I guess I better go see what Gina wants this time.

"What do you want Gina, I am busy," Castle calls, not really want to talk to her. They never really got alone.

"I bet you are." Gena snorts coming in right past, Martha.

"I'll get my check-book," Castle turns to go back to his office.

"Richard," he stops to the call of his name turning he responds with a yes.

"That's not what I am here for."

"Than?" he questions, "What?" He slides his hands down his face, hoping that she would disappear and this was a dream, but when she didn't go away, he sighs.

"I wanted to remind you about the book party on Friday." Book party, Castle blinks, shaking his head.

"And you couldn't do that over the phone, you had to come all the way over here across town to tell me that." Castle runs his fingers through his short brown hair. Why did my hair grow so long; need another haircut I guess.

"I also wanted you to meet someone before I and Alexis go shopping for dresses."

"And who would that be?"

"This is little Ricky," The little boy hid behind his mother's leg some. Hoping that he wouldn't get seen.

"I'll be ready in a minute Gina." Matha calls out shuffling things around in the kitchen area. Castle stares at the little boy for a second than realizes something. Those eyes, the hair and that smile. He puts his finger to his chin, like his thinking.

"He's mine isn't he?" He whispers to his mother passing her on the way to his kitchen. She nods, "Wait, you..."

She shrugs at her son, "I came across a picture a couple of days ago when I was on face-booking of the both of them. He looks just like you did when you were a kid his age."

"I know, does he? I lived through that stage. He looks just like I did, even has that smile down to a T."

"So I confronted Gina, she told me the truth. I am another grandmother."

"I was wondering if you could watch him while we went shopping today. I didn't really want to take him with us." Gina interrupts the two talking.

"Why didn't you tell me." Castle's voice rose. Gina quickly places her hands over her son's ears. "When?" Castle questions her just to make sure that she wasn't going to lie to her about Ricky.

"If you don't know how babies are born, you need help, Richard."

"Not that, I mean..."

"We had that night in bed a couple of months before we got the papers for our separation signed."

"You didn't tell me," Castle responds, looking over at little Ricky, who was still trying to hide from being seen.

"When we got divorced it wasn't a good time for us. I wasn't about to bring him into that."

"So you just..." Martha saw that the little boy was getting frightened by them almost yelling at each other. She steps in.

"Let's worry about that later kiddo," she pats her son on the shoulder, then glances at Gina. "Times a ticking." She points to her watch.

"You're going with her mother." Castle sounds shocked. He never knew his mother to want to have anything to do with his ex's. Alexis makes her way down the stairs.

"So will you watch with Ricky?" Gina makes one last plea. Hoping that Castle will get over the shock about being a father and watch him for the day. She told her son that he would get to meet his father soon just didn't tell him that he was standing right there in front of him. She wasn't sure she even wanted Castle in the little boy's life. They were doing just fine without him.

"Yes," he smiles. "Yes, I will." A calmer Castle answers her.

"Ricky dear, give mommy a hug and stay with..." the little boy hugs his mother then looks in the direction of Castle.

"Castle's the name." Castle held out his hand to the little boy, "Nice to meet you, little fella." The boy just stands there not moving from his mother's side.

"Shake his hand son," the boy continues to stand there. "He's a good friend of mine." Martha bit her lip from commenting something else to go with that. Ricky slowly decides that it was okay and shakes Castle's hand, then withdrew it quickly. Only if he knew who I was, Castle thought.

After Martha, Alexis and Gina leave the little boy just stands there, staring at Castle holding his teddy bear.

"So what do you want to do?" Castle asks Ricky. The little boy steps forward then shrugs. Castle thought for a second, then he remembers that his daughter always liked to go the park so maybe, this one would like it too.

"I have an idea how about we go to the park."

"The what? What's that?" The boy looks up at Castle. Oh, Gina's never taken him to one. Castle smiles, then this can be our thing. Father-son thing. I just hope he likes it.

"It will be fun, come." Castle gets down to his son's level and holds out his hand. The boy this time was quick to take his hand.

"Can Teddy come with us?"

Castle nods, "Sure."

TBC...