Set in a world where everyone has countdown timers on their arms. The countdown is to meeting your soulmate.

Strings Attached

WolfStar

"I've still got a year," Sirius said, looking at the numbers on his arm. "Not sure exactly, I'm not going to sit around and do the maths, am I?"

James laughed. "A year to do whatever you want," he replied. "What about you, Moony?"

Remus glanced up from his book, his fingers turning white where he was gripping it so hard. "Hmm?" he asked mildly, as though he wasn't following the conversation, though Sirius knew him well enough to know that his page hadn't turned in about four minutes, which meant Remus wasn't really reading.

"Your timer," James pushed. "On your arm. You never say - how long is left?"

Remus shrugged slightly, his eyes fixed on his book, but Sirius could take in his stiff stance. "I don't keep track, it'll happen when it happens," he insisted.

"Give us a hint though," James pushed. "This year?"

Remus shook his head.

"Great. Me and Moony out on the town," Sirius insisted. "We both have time before we meet our soulmates, maybe we could go out tonight and pick someone up?"

Remus hesitated for a long moment.

"James?" Sirius asked, already knowing Remus was going to refuse. He always refused. James speculated that Remus was saving himself for his soulmate. Sirius wasn't saving himself though - not that he would admit to his friends, but he craved the touch of someone else on his skin. He needed to feel wanted, loved. Even if the feeling didn't last long.

James shook his head, his smile fading a little. "It's date night with Lily," he said, his voice taking on a tired tone. He glanced at his wrist where the numbers were a line of zeros with black swirls framing them. "You guys are lucky that you have more time rather than be stuck… no, I don't mean stuck. I like Lily - she's my soulmate, but…"

"But?" Sirius asked, frowning slightly.

"Finding my soulmate at eleven wasn't what I expected," James finished. "The timer told me it would happen, but at the same time, I didn't… what if they're wrong."

"Wrong?" Sirius repeated, aghast. "Soulmates are the person that is perfect for you. Your everything." He smiled down at his arm. "I can't wait to find mine." Because he'd be with someone who'd make him feel wanted and loved all of the time.

Remus slammed the book shut, causing the pair to jump. "You know what, I'm in for tonight," he said.

Sirius' eyes widened in shock. "You're never up for it," he murmured. "I assumed you were saving yourself for your soulmate or something."

Remus shrugged. "Why wait around?"

...oOo...

Sirius frowned as he walked away from the man he had been talking to at the bar. He passed one drink to Remus before taking a mouthful of his own beer.

Remus glanced towards the bar. "Not having any luck?"

Sirius shrugged. It was never difficult to pick someone up at a bar like this. It was more the idea of going off with someone and leaving Remus that bothered him. None of these guys deserved to sleep with Remus, none were even close to being good enough. "It wasn't going too bad, but something occurred to me."

"What?"

"You've never had sex," Sirius pointed out. "I know you'd have told us if you had. So if you sleep with someone here tonight, it'll be a stranger and you'll regret it."

Remus watched him warily, setting the beer down on the table. "Your point?"

"Because our friendship matters to both of us and I don't want to make things awkward or weird, I'm just going to suggest this once. If you don't like it, then we forget it happened…" he took another big mouthful of his drink. "I think you should lose your virginity to me."

"I don't want a pity—" Remus began.

"I think you're attractive. If we weren't friends, I'd have made a move on you already," Sirius explained, carefully choosing his words. "We're both waiting to find our soulmates, but you coming out tonight tells me that you're not waiting on them, so why sleep with strangers? Maybe I could take you home."

The offer hung in the air between them and Remus sipped his drink in thought. As Sirius waited for an answer, a man approached their table, but Sirius shook his head, gesturing for the man to leave.

So, maybe he had harboured some feelings for Remus for a little while. Remus was clearly waiting for his soulmate and Sirius had never expected to have a chance with his friend. Not that he could offer much, because soulmates mattered.

But the idea of innocent Remus going home with someone who wouldn't appreciate him made Sirius feel ill. He himself had lost his virginity to a stranger and it wasn't an experience he cared to recall. He had told his friends about it though. He didn't want Remus to have a bad experience or to have any regrets.

"Just one night," Remus replied softly. "You're right. I'd much rather… with you. I trust you."

Sirius nodded. "Do you want to finish your drink and stick around here for a bit before… or should I call a cab now?" he asked, already making plans in his mind. Remus trusted him to make this perfect and that's what he planned to do.

"Call the cab," Remus replied. He grabbed Sirius' hand and pulled him towards the doors and Sirius eagerly followed, fumbling for his phone.

The call took all of thirty seconds. When he turned back to Remus, he was shocked to be shoved roughly against the wall, Remus' body pressing against his.

Kissing happened when he was in bed with someone else, when things were getting hot and heavy and hands were exploring. Kissing was hard and fierce and desperate.

Sirius knew kissing could also be gentle and sweet and loving, but that type of kiss wasn't suited for one-night-stands. But Remus' lips gently pressed against his and Sirius made no move to change the kiss for what it should have been.

Because this was Remus.

Remus: his best friend since he was eleven, the person who had suffered for years without a single complaint, who had stood at his side no matter what - even when Sirius was in the wrong. Remus who had been there for him when he had been forced to run away. Remus, one of three people who he pictured when imagining his future. There was no way he could treat Remus like one of the other one-night stands because Remus deserved to be worshipped.

Remus came with his own individual set of rules, Sirius decided. He was going to give Remus a night that'd make him smile whenever he thought back to his first time.

Remus kissed in a way that Sirius imagined his soulmate would kiss him. Softly, lovingly, not stopping until they had to catch their breath, but even then, it was only a moment separated before Remus was pulling him close again. Or Sirius was pulling Remus close, he wasn't even sure what was happening.

They only stopped when the cab pulled up.

...oOo...

The room was dark and there was silence except for the sound of the clock in the hallway and Remus' breathing.

Sirius felt like he would never catch his breath after that. Though he had made plans in the cab over what he would do when they got back to their flat, those plans quickly changed when they walked into Remus' bedroom and he found himself pressing Remus up against the door, desperate to kiss him again.

After that kiss, Sirius had lost himself in the other man, spending time exploring his body and allowing Remus to do the same. Finally Remus was ready for him.

Sirius wasn't ready for Remus though, because as their bodies moved, Sirius couldn't stop thinking about how right it felt to do this with him. How perfect it was. How much it actually meant. It wasn't supposed to mean something. But he didn't stop because at that moment, there was no-where he'd rather be.

And in the middle of the night as Remus lay sleeping at his side, exhausted from what had happened, Sirius knew he should leave Remus' bed. It was just one night - a one-night-stand.

Instead he moved closer to Remus, resting his head on his friend's chest and throwing an arm around him.

A moment later, Remus' hands came up around him, holding him tightly.

...oOo...

He awoke to fingers moving down his back and lips pressing against his skin.

Sirius laid in the bed as the memories came rushing back from the night before. Waking up next to his best friend was stupid. He hadn't really thought his actions through the night before, because he knew that their close friendship could mean that they'd get too attached to each other. Yet he made no move away.

"I know you're awake," Remus murmured, his lips grazing Sirius' hip. "So I need to ask… we said one night. Does the following morning count as part of that? Or did that one-night end the moment we fell asleep?"

The moment we fell asleep, Sirius wanted to reply. Well, that's what he knew he should reply. But want? What he wanted was for Remus' lips to continue because he suspected where they were heading. "We're still in bed so it still counts," he murmured sleepily. Fingers pressed against his hip, urging him onto his back and Sirius complied.

"Is this all okay?" Remus whispered, watching him shyly. Sirius grinned. Remus' actions had been bold, yet he was shy now that Sirius was looking at him.

"Perfect," Sirius said, slightly scared at how accurate that word fit everything that was happening with Remus.

Relax, he told himself. It was supposed to be the best with a soulmate. So if this was with a friend, having sex with his soulmate would probably be so amazing, he'd die from it.

"No strings though," he added softly.

Remus smiled, pausing for a moment to glance back at Sirius. "I don't understand," he said. "No strings for last night and this morning, or are you suggesting that we do this again but keep everything that happens as no strings?"

His lips moved back to Sirius' hip as she waited for his answer. "We can do this again," he agreed. After all, it was better that Remus do this with someone he knew rather than picking up strangers in a bar. He would never relax with any of them because of his concerns about his own body, but he could relax with Sirius. He knew Sirius never judged him on his scars.

They didn't leave the bed until lunchtime.

...oOo...

"Remus, I was wondering," Sirius said, as he tapped on the ajar door before pushing it open, only to find Remus curled under his duvet, book in hand. "The other day when we…"

"Had sex," Remus filled in, closing the book and setting it aside.

Not the words that had immediately come to Sirius' mind, but he didn't correct Remus. "Yeah. We said 'no strings attached' if we wanted to do it again. I wanted to talk to you about that."

Remus nodded, patting his bed. Sirius walked over and dropped down onto the soft wool blanket, his fingers running over the material for a moment.

"I don't like going to bars or pubs to pick people up and I can't imagine that you'd be interested in doing that either," he said. "So how about we do your 'no strings attached' suggestion whenever we're in the mood? Friends with benefits or whatever."

Remus watched him for a long moment. "You're in the mood right now, aren't you?" he asked, knowing smile appearing on his lips. "I'm up for it. Until you meet your soulmate, we can have fun."

Sirius nodded, relieved. He had been worried that Remus would ask him to leave, offended at the very idea. But Remus was interested. He had a year of amazing sex to look forward to, no strings attached.

"Let's not tell James though," Remus added. "He'll worry about us."

"Yeah, let's leave James out of this," Sirius agreed. His eyes followed Remus as his friend began to remove his clothes, eager to see the revealed skin. "Should we talk about… about things we're not comfortable with?" Sirius suggested.

Remus shook his head. "For tonight, we'll stick with what we've already done," he told Sirius. "If we want to try something new, we can discuss beforehand rather than sitting and making a list. I don't really know what I don't like currently." His eyes moved down Sirius' body. "But I do know that I want you naked."

Sirius' fingers quickly moved to take his t-shirt off.

"And I don't know how comfortable you are with the idea, but I'd like to try 'topping' at some point, but only if you're comfortable with the idea."

Sirius hesitated for a moment. He usually took charge and topped. Only once did he do it the other way, and that was during his first time.

But this was Remus and he could trust his best friend the same way Remus trusted him.

"Soon," he said softly. "I need to…"

Remus leaned over, his finger gently pressing against Sirius' lips. "Your first time?" he guessed. "There's no rush, Sirius. You know I'd never push you to do anything that you're uncomfortable with, okay?"

Sirius nodded. He had no doubts at all about that. Had it been Remus for his first time, he imagined it would have been amazing, even if he had been on the bottom of things.

"Let me take your mind off it," Remus murmured softly. His hand wrapped around one of Sirius' biceps. "I'm all yours."

Sirius grinned. Remus was all his. He liked he sound of that.

...oOo...

Remus' lips pressed against the back of his shoulder. "I know this is outside of the bedroom, so is this okay?" Remus checked, his hands coming to grip Sirius' hips.

Sirius could only nod. Saying no to Remus wasn't an option it seemed.

"We agreed we have about a year in this agreement, so I think it's alright," he replied. "But if you want a nice dinner after the morning we've had… you better not distract me. Otherwise we won't be eating tonight because I won't be able to keep my hands off you."

Remus' arms slipped around his waist and Sirius glanced down, noticing a band covering the area just below Remus' wrist where the timer sat. He wondered how many years Remus had before meeting his soulmate and hoped Remus' was not long after his own. He hated the idea of Remus being alone whilst Sirius was happy with someone.

"I'll just stand here and watch," Remus murmured softly, his chin resting on Sirius' shoulder.

Sirius smiled as he stirred the curry he was making. Everything about this moment was perfect. He knew he was using that word a lot recently, but Remus was the most perfect man ever and he was shocked how he had never realised it before.

...oOo...

The full moon took its usual toll on Remus the following month. But this time, Sirius climbed into bed next to Remus and held him tightly, just offering a whole new level of comfort. There was nothing sexual like all of the other times they had been in bed together.

And when they put a movie on the tv and had popcorn… they usually sat at opposite ends of the sofa. It just made sense to share the blanket, share the bowl. To cuddle together. To share soft kisses whilst the movie played. Sirius liked to cuddle after all.

It was only for the year. Friends with benefits. Not getting attached. He'd be able to give this up once it was time to meet his soulmate and Remus assured him that he could too.

He snuggled closer to Remus, more content about his life than he had ever been before.

...oOo...

"Lily wants to get married," James admitted, head in his hands.

"What's wrong with that? She's your soulmate after all," Sirius pointed out as he wrote out a shopping list. It was a year to the day he had first slept with Remus and wanted to celebrate.

James looked up, the usual smile not on his face. "Sirius, try and be a friend here, okay?" he asked. "Maybe you're happy that the world has chosen someone for you, but that's not all of us. Some of us want to take the time to fall in love with someone else - to choose our happiness rather than allowing the world to decide for us."

Sirius paused. "I'm sorry," he said after a moment of consideration. "I forget there are people who don't feel the same as me about soulmates. You can talk to me - I won't let my views ruin this talk, I'll be objective."

James' head fell back into his hands. "I think she's only expecting it because we're soulmates. I honestly believe if we weren't, she wouldn't be with me. Neither of us are happy, but… but our numbers made us be together. What should I do?"

James had stopped over a few times after disagreements or fights with Lily, but Sirius suspected that these happened for every couple. Even Dorea and Charlus argued and they were Sirius' marriage goals - he wanted his marriage to his soulmate to be like them. James had never sounded this unhappy and Sirius felt guilty that he had missed all the signs, too wrapped up in his own beliefs and his situation with Remus to see anything else.

"It seems like you have two choices. Leave or marry her," Sirius said softly. "And if you don't want marriage and a future with her…"

"I should leave her," James whispered. "But we're connected through the timers. We'll continue to feel this pull to be together."

Sirius glanced at James' arm. The timer was almost identical to his.

"Maybe we can see if there's a way to break the bond," he suggested, pulling out his phone.

"This isn't everything," James admitted as Sirius began to type. Sirius barely glanced up as he clicked a reliable looking link.

"What?" Sirius murmured, before scrolling down the page.

"I'm in love with someone else," James admitted. "We spend a lot of time together. Nothing has happened, but…"

"Is this why you're not happy with Lily?" Sirius asked, turning his attention from the images on his phone.

James shook his head. "No. I've not been happy with Lily since the start, though we made a go of it because of our timers. This… this is new. I didn't expect to fall for him. Nothing's happened at all. I haven't even told him I have feelings. We just work together and… and I…"

Sirius sighed softly. "Don't do anything until you've broken your bond with Lily. You may not love her, but she deserves that at least."

"I know. I just needed to know what to do. Whether to stay with Lily or… or not. I've wanted to leave for… for over a year. Longer. I've stayed, trying to make it work but it's clear that it's not. I'd never cheat on her. I've been trying to make things work and trying to ignore these feelings."

"Wait," Sirius said, setting the phone down in front of James. "You work with my brother. You… you… you're not talking about him are you?"

James paled, grabbing the phone and looking at the information Sirius had offered, and Sirius sunk into a chair.

"I don't know if he even feels the same. I just know that if I'm capable of falling in love outside of the bond, perhaps Lily isn't the only… we're made to believe that we'll only love our soulmates but that's not true. Even without… without Regulus, I'd..."

"Don't even think about making a move on my brother," Sirius warned. "You're in a relationship, you're living with Lily. He might be waiting on his own soulmate. If you do this, you do it right."

James nodded. "You know me - you know I wouldn't fuck about like that, especially with your brother." He turned his gaze to the phone. "I cut through my timer," he murmured. His gaze quickly moved to the knives on the counter. "I… it's so easy. I could just… just do it now." He put the phone down. "No. I'm going home to talk this through with Lily."

"Good luck, whatever you decide," Sirius said, reaching for his phone. The door shut behind James and Sirius read the article before returning to his shopping list.

Roast chicken and potatoes with a chocolate dessert. Maybe some romantic music and a film afterwards so they could cuddle on the sofa.

List done, he turned his gaze back to his phone. The picture was still up of someone who had tattooed over their mark though the scar was still obvious underneath, and he shuddered. He glanced at his own, his eyes widening as he took in the numbers.

Twelve days. He had been so distracted by his fling with Remus, he hadn't been watching his timer and it was almost the day to meet his soulmate.

He should be jumping for joy, or rushing after James to tell him, but Sirius did neither. He wasn't sure why he wasn't more excited over this. He was going to meet the love of his life, his future. His everything.

...oOo...

"That was delicious," Remus said, setting down his fork. "It's not my birthday, so what's brought this on?"

Sirius grinned, delighted that Remus enjoyed his cooking. He had been particularly nervous about the chocolate dessert, knowing Remus was very fussy over food.

"I just realised it's been a year since we first slept together. Thought we should celebrate," Sirius said. "Come on, dance with me."

Remus hesitated for a long moment, his gaze fixed on Sirius. Sirius lowered the half he had offered. "Of we could do something else if you don't want to dance."

"No, I'd love nothing more than to dance with you," Remus insisted, getting to his feet, his gaze not leaving Sirius'. He took the offered hand. "Let's move this to the living room."

Sirius' smile widened again and he grabbed the radio from the counter, setting it into the living room before he pulled Remus into his arms.

Remus' arms wrapped around his waist and Remus held him tightly. Sirius' own moved up around Remus' neck.

"I've never been happier," Sirius said, all thoughts about his soulmate and timer forgotten, because whenever he was with Remus, Remus was the centre of his world.

"I was just about to say the same thing," Remus whispered.

...oOo...

The next morning, it was the first time Sirius had woken to an empty bed after a night with Remus. He reached for his lover, wanting to spend the morning in bed with him until hunger forced them up, but the bed was cold. Remus has been gone a while, he wasn't just in the loo or somewhere.

Sirius climbed out of the bed, grabbing some clean boxers on the way. He pulled them on and went in search of his lover, finding Remus sitting at the coffee table.

"Remus?"

"Sirius, we need to end this," Remus said. There was a hoarseness to his voice that struck Sirius as though Remus had been crying.

"End what?" Sirius asked.

"Us," Remus replied. "You've only got a few days left on the timer and—"

"Yes, but we can still have fun in those few days," Sirius pointed out. "Remus, come back to bed, we—"

"No," Remus snapped. "I'm… I'm sorry for snapping. Sirius, I need to tell you the truth."

Sirius sat down, his eyes on Remus as Remus pulled the band off his wrist. "My timer ended when I was bitten." He revealed the blank arm to Sirius. There was just a boarder, black swirls framing the empty space. "I wasn't waiting for a soulmate, I was waiting to find someone like me, without a timer or… or whose partner was dead or something. Morbid, I know."

Sirius reached for Remus' arm. "I'm sorry," he murmured.

"That's not all. Sirius, we agreed this was no strings attached. We both know that no strings stopped a long time ago. No strings isn't cuddles on the sofa or breakfast in bed together. We've been acting like we're in a relationship for most of this year now. Last night we celebrated our anniversary, even if that's not how you saw it."

Sirius stayed silent. He couldn't argue because everything Remus said was the truth. In the back of his mind he already knew all of this, he just didn't want to admit anything. Admitting it made it all the more real.

"Why now?" Sirius asked instead.

"Because I've been trying everything possible to stop myself from falling in love with you this year," Remus said, pulling his hand away. "And last night I realised it's much too late for that. So we stop now because it gets harder. I almost said it yesterday, but… but I wanted one last night with you. Sirius, I'm in love with you and in a few days you're going to meet your soulmate and get everything you ever wanted. So I'm going to stay with James for a few weeks. I've packed my things."

"Remus, don't leave," Sirius whispered.

Remus smiled. "It's for the best," he said. "You won't have to tiptoe around me whilst meeting your soulmate and falling in love. And if it doesn't work out with him… well, you can give me a call. I almost left earlier, but I thought you deserved an explanation."

With that, he stood up from the table. "I'll come back when I can… let go of these feelings."

He walked from the room and a moment later the front door closed.

Sirius stared after him. Remus was giving him space to find his soulmate and fall in love.

But why did it feel like he was losing everything? Why did he feel like losing Remus was the worst thing that could ever happen?

Why did he feel so empty?

...oOo...

Twelve hours. Sirius stared at his wrist, the sense of dread growing stronger with each hour that passed. He hadn't seen or heard from Remus since Remus left days ago, and he avoided visiting James because he didn't want to make things harder on his best friend.

Every night he had lain in Remus' bed, wishing he wasn't there alone. He curled up, cuddling one of Remus' pillows.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. He had a soulmate out there, but as the days passed by, Sirius felt more and more like he had lost his soulmate. He wondered if Remus was hurting as much. He must be, Sirius decided. Because Remus had been in love with him, and losing someone you loved caused hurt.

He realised with sudden clarity that he was hurting because of Remus. Because he was in love with Remus. He understood suddenly why he was dreading the arrival of his soulmate - it was because he didn't want this person anymore. His heart had belonged to Remus since that first night, even if he didn't want to admit it.

He stumbled to the shower. He couldn't remember his last shower and didn't want to go and find Remus smelling gross. He wanted to look his best when he told Remus he was in love with him; when he informed Remus that he didn't want his soulmate.

For the first time in days, Sirius smiled, imagining the look on Remus' face when Sirius confessed his love. He would bring Remus back to their flat. He'd move his stuff into Remus' room and they'd spend their lives together.

Shower done, Sirius headed to the kitchen to grab something to eat on the way, when his gaze fell on the knives. He dropped the banana and stared at the block.

Soulmates had a bond and even if he chose Remus, that bond would make things hard. James had been suffering for a long time because that bond drew him to Lily, making it harder to leave her.

He walked over to them.

Moments later, blood dripped from his arm and the metal knife clattered into the sink. Sirius ignored the blood dripping on the floor and headed for the door.

...oOo…

"I've been waiting for you to turn up and fix whatever it is you did," James said, leaning against the door frame. Suddenly his eyes widened as he noticed the blood. "What… what did you do?"

"Timer broke somehow," Sirius said cheerfully. "Where's Remus?"

"In the living room, but you can't go in there with…" he trailed off as Sirius rushed past him.

"Remus!"

"Sirius?" Remus said, jumping up. "You need to go, this is a bad… you're hurt! Let me get the first-aid… your… your timer?"

"I broke it because I realised that I'm in love with you. I can't imagine having a soulmate that means as much as you do. In fact, I believe that you're my soulmate because I can't live without you. I want to spend my life with you, so no more timer - nothing getting in the way of us."

"You're telling me that you realised you love him and broke your timer straight away?" James asked.

Sirius nodded, taking Remus' hand in his. "I love you," he said. "Come home, let's start our lives together properly." He turned to look at James. "Lily here?"

"She's staying with her mum for a bit," he muttered. "You just did it… that easily?"

"I love Remus. Why let anything or anyone get in the way of that."

James nodded. "You're right. Can I crash on your sofa for a bit? I've made my mind up."

"Well, if Remus is cool, I'll be moving into his room so you can take mine."

"I'll end things with Lily tonight," James said softly. "It's how it needs to be."

"We're here for you," Remus said softly. "You can have the room as long as you like. You can properly move in if you need."

James grinned. "I'll take you up on that," he said. "The longer I put this off, the longer I'm leading Lily on. At least this way I'm giving her the chance to move on too."

"No rebounding with my brother though," Sirius warned him, before turning back to Remus. "So… have I made a fool of myself here? You still want to be with me, right?"

"More than anything," Remus said. "I never dreamt you'd want this. I love you."

"Well, let's go home then," Sirius said.

"After I pack a bag," James insisted.

"After I heal your arm," Remus added.