"Padfoot, for the last time, it's two tablespoons, not three." I corrected, for what felt like the billionth time.
"Right. Sorry. Two. Yeah." Sirius replied sleepily.
"Okay. Right, let's try this again. What's the first step?" I quizzed, nudging my friend with my elbow. We had a potions exam tomorrow, and of course Sirius had put off studying then begged me to stay up and help him.
"Moony, c'mon, it's almost 3, and I think I know it well enough not to fail too bad…." Sirius whined, trying to shove my book out of my hands.
"Just one more time, then we can go to bed. I promise." I replied
"Remmy, I don't wanna." Sirius whined, rubbing his head on my shoulder like some sort of cat.
His hair tickled my neck, and I tried not to gasp. I wanted to tell him to stop, but that would just hurt his feelings. Sirius had no way of knowing how he affected me. And he would never find out. No one would.
I shoved him away playfully and said, "I don't care what you want Sirius, I'm not gonna let you fail."
He grinned and replied, "Aw, look at Moony getting all protective of his Padfoot. That's adorable."
I turned so he wouldn't see my face as it flushed pink and took a deep breath. Sometimes I could've sworn that boy tortured me on purpose. I turned back to look at him as he unfolded his legs from underneath him so he was kneeling on the couch, then scooted closer to me.
"Please Remmy? Can we at least take a break?" He was clutching at my arm, and I was finding it very hard to think straight.
"No Sirius. We're gonna keep studying until you know it perfectly." I ignored him adorable pout and started back in on my quizzing. "Okay, does the salamander blood go in before or after the chopped lizard tail?"
"Trick question. They go in at the same time." He answered sulkily, with his arms folded tight across his chest.
"Good. What goes after that?" I questioned, trying to ignore his thigh pressing against mine.
"Three clockwise stirs, four counterclockwise, repeat until it turns orange." He replied sullenly.
We continued on like this for four or five minutes, until Sirius decided he was bored again and wanted to "distract" me.
Sirius slid closer until his nose was up against my neck, inhaling deeply. I tried to keep my heart rate under control but it was nearly impossible with his nose pressed against me like that, his hot breath falling against my skin...
"Mmm, Remmy you smell good." He purred, nuzzling my neck.
I was paralyzed. How the Hell was I supposed to respond to this? He was just tired and trying to distract me. It doesn't mean anything. Yeah, good luck convincing my hormones of that...
"Why do you smell so good Remmy?" Sirius questioned, still running his nose along my neck.
"I – it's called shampoo, Sirius. Try using some sometime." I answered, hoping my voice wasn't shaking too noticeably. Why was he doing this? He must've found out. He must've noticed me staring at him one day, or holding him too long when he hugged me casually. He was probably just teasing me, making fun of the gay werewolf, trying to see how long I could last before I'd run up to my bed and pull the curtains...
Soon his nose was running through my hair, his hand creeping onto my thigh. "Mm, no, your hair smells different. It's not the shampoo. Why does your skin smell so good?" His face was back to my neck, slowly moving forward so his hair tickled my chin.
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down before saying, "I – I dunno, Sirius. C - can't we just finish studying?"
He shoved my book off my lap, purring in my ear, "Aww, Remmy, you're no fun. I don't want to study." His lips had moved against my ear now, and I couldn't focus on anything other than the adorable noises of satisfaction he made as he nuzzled against my neck.
"S – Sirius, you've got to study. You – you can't fail potions-"
He cut me off by swinging a leg over both of mine so that he was straddling my lap and asked huskily, "Is potions all you think about, Remus?" I shivered slightly. He hardly ever called me by my real name, usually preferring some annoying nickname.
My heart was pounding in my ears and I could barely form a coherent thought. Sirius Black was sitting on my lap, his dark eyes boring into mine, his hands on my chest. "I - no. I think about other stuff." I said shakily.
"Like what?" He shifted closer to me so that our lips were mere inches away from each other and shoved his hands into my hair, running his fingers through it carefully.
"I – um, I think about Quidditch, and, um-"
Sirius cut me off by leaning in further and whispering, "Me. You think about me."
I froze. Of course he knew. That's why he was doing this. To mock me. James was probably hiding close by, cracking up. Had I really let myself believe that he might have been sincere? But Sirius wasn't that mean, was he? He was my best friend, he wouldn't do that. Before I could even finish my thought he had pressed his lips to mine, kissing me gently, exploring slowly. By the time I remembered I was supposed to move my lips back, he had pulled away, his eyes searching mine.
"I know you think about me Remmy." He kissed me briefly, softly, just the ghost of a kiss, really. "It's okay. I think about you too." He whispered, lips brushing against my ear.
He kissed me again and looked at me with a sort of vulnerability, begging for some sort of approval from me. Suddenly I knew that there was no way this was a prank. Not even Sirius was that good of an actor. My heart soared with happiness and a sort of elation overtook my whole body. Sirius Black was kissing me. And once again, I forgot to kiss him back. Damn, he's going to think I don't like him. I grabbed his shoulders and pulled him close, kissing away any shadow of a doubt he might have had.
"What exactly do you think of me, Sirius?" I asked, grinning up at him.
"Well, I think you're brilliant, clever, funny, " he punctuated each word with a small peck on my lips, just barely applying any pressure. "talented, handsome, gorgeous, " he continued, as the kisses got longer and harder to pull away from. "attractive, adorable, sexy, so fucking hot-"
This time we couldn't stop. His lips smashed against mine and I kissed him back furiously, wrapping my arms tight around his back. I'd waited so long for this, since I was fourteen and noticed that I liked hugging Sirius better than James or Pete, since I noticed I liked feeling Sirius's arms around me, since I noticed that the full moons weren't so bad when I had him to come back to.
Sirius pulled back and looked at me lovingly before asking, "Rem, are you sure you want to do this? Don't let me talk you into anything-"
I stopped by kissing him softly on the mouth before saying, "Sirius, I have wanted you, wanted this, for so long, I-" the memories of how difficult it is to be in love with your (supposedly) straight best friend for two years made tears prick my eyes and my throat go dry.
Sirius kissed me gently then wiped away a single tear that snuck out of my eye. "I'm so sorry Rem. I know it must've been hard. I just... I didn't know what I felt, and it scared me. But I know now. I want you, Rem. I need you."
I grinned against his mouth as I kissed him, still not quite believing what was happening. Soon he had knocked me over and I was laying on the couch, my best friend on top of me. What was he now? My boyfriend? God I hoped so. I wanted the whole world to know he was mine. But I also wanted to keep this a secret. If other people knew, it might not feel so amazingly dirty to be making out with my best friend at 3 AM. While the rest of the school slept, Sirius Black was almost forcing his tongue down my throat. And not a single person knew. I liked having something like this that was ours. No one else could steal it from us or even try to ruin it.
"Stop thinking so much, Remmy." Sirius whispered, licking the curve of my ear.
I grinned and pulled him back onto me, kissing him deeply. I gently bit his lower lip, eliciting a low moan as he forced his hands under my t-shirt. I shivered as his warm, knowing hands worked their way up my stomach, rubbing patterns onto my skin. Soon my shirt was pulled off and thrown over the couch, our lips only parting for short, gasping breaths.
After a few minutes, or maybe it was a whole lifetime, Sirius's lips moved to my throat, kissing a path down to the hollow between my collarbone. "Mmm, Rem, you really do smell delicious." Sirius commented as his tongue shot out to lick my neck. "Merlin, you taste amazing too." His teeth followed his tongue, and he was soon sucking on my throat, not caring about the bright pink pink mark he'd leave. At least it was November and I could get away with wearing a turtleneck tomorrow.
I wanted to tell him how amazing that felt and beg him not to stop, but when I opened my mouth all that came out was, "God, Sirius, don't-" He kept sucking on my neck as senseless moans escaped my lips, probably loud enough to wake the whole castle.
Sirius pulled back from my neck and admired the red mark he had left, smiling as he ran his thumb over it. God he was gorgeous when he smiled. I tried to draw his head back up to kiss that gorgeous mouth, but he ducked down to my chest, pressing his lips agasint my skin, right above my heart. Once again his tongue and teeth soon followed and he was sucking on me again, his arms still wrapped tightly around my hips.
This time when he pulled back I slid my hands into his hair, gently coaxing him up until he was close enough for me to press my mouth to his. He kissed back wildly, running his fingers through my hair and along my neck.
All too soon he pulled back and whispered, "Rem, someone's coming."
I giggled at the wording of his sentence, until the words actually sunk into my arousal-ridden mind. After that, I sat up so fast Sirius was practically thrown off the end of the couch. I grabbed my shirt from the floor and tugged it back on, trying to flatten my hair at the same time. I placed my book strategically over my lap just as the door to the boy's dormitory cracked open. Sirius was staring pointedly at my neck, almost as if he were trying to tell me something- oh fuck. I threw my hand over my throat, hoping I could cover Sirius's mark by pretending to scratch my neck.
The door swung open fully and James stepped out, his hair mussed from sleep. "Oh, there you guys are. Still studying?" He asked, oblivious to me and Sirius's discomfort.
"Yeah, we were just finishing up." Sirius responded calmly, running a hand through his hair.
"Oh, okay. I was just wondering. It's getting pretty late. You really should go to bed." He admonished, turning to go back up the stairs.
"Yes mum." Sirius scoffed as James retreated back to the dorms.
"We'll be right up." I added.
Once James's footsteps disappeared I looked at Sirius with caution, trying to gauge his reaction. Obviously we would have to tell James and Peter sometime.… However, Sirius had obviously decided that this was not the time to deal with that. He was grinning madly at me, and I couldn't help but smile back. A deep chuckle escaped his lips, and soon we were both laughing, leaning against each other for support.
Sirius tucked his head under my chin, slowly nuzzling into my neck. I watched as his eyes drifted shut, ignoring the fact that I would have to wake him up momentarily. I just let myself stare at him, deciding that this was possibly the happiest moment of my life.