Yin & Yang
Summary: As Jounin Commander, Nara Shikaku wasn't supposed to be a sensei. In fact, his job was to fail the team assigned to him without question. It was a real drag, of course, but they sure as hell didn't take the blond brat into consideration. And how could he fail a team that showed that much promise? Different team, different sensei and new roads to power...
Take note of: The Genin Exam isn't identical to canon and this is on purpose. The story revolves around the team, not just Naruto himself, even though he's the "main character".
NB! The document uploader made a mess of my chapter - mostly by adding or removing bold and italic effects. I've tried to correct them all, but give me a note if you find any. Big thanks to my beta Madeyes.
30.05.2011 - Chapter updated to fix a few mistakes.
~Chapter One~
Naruto kicked the leg of his table in annoyance, his young face scowling at the pitiful clone attempt before him. He had practiced all day! It was not, however, improving. Slumping onto the couch with a sigh, he faintly hoped Iruka wouldn't mind only two out of three successes. Practice, practice, Iruka says. I don't see any improvement, and I've practiced thrice that of my classmates! Naruto's thoughts swirled, but no solutions peeked through the dark, cloudy thoughts. Well, he'd just have to impress them with his Transformation and Replacement Technique then.
He faintly wondered who would be on his team, and gave himself a small, uplifting grin at the thought of Sakura. Yeah, that would be nice. He could save a lot of princesses and beat up a lot of bandits, and that would surely impress her!
He rubbed his arm as the feeling of ghostly pain snuck up on him. Weird.
"Neh, Iruka-sensei, can we learn a new jutsu today?" Kyo didn't need to see him to know who'd spoken the words. The predictable question came from the class' unpredictable prankster, a mindboggling person if there ever was one. Uzumaki Naruto was currently jumping eagerly in his seat, awaiting the response which Kyo was sure would be a negative. Kyo faintly wondered, as Naruto sank into his seat in disappointment, yet sprang back up again with a new question a second later, if the Kyuubi was the reason for the boy's endless energy.
Kyo was perhaps the only one in the class, besides the teachers, who knew what the boy contained, but it was not due to some excellent espionage or Inuzuka-like hearing. His father, may he rot in hell, had been moaning and grumbling about the boy for years before his death, with no sense of self-preservation at all. He'd told Kyo straight out what the boy was - or rather, what he thought he was - which ironically had lead to events Kyo was rather thankful for. The Sandaime had corrected his father's interpretations - that Naruto wasn't the demon, but the jailor - right after he'd had his father detained for revealing S-Class secrets.
His father was hanged the day after.
A terrible, abusing and hateful man, Naruto had inadvertently saved six-year-old Kyo from his repeatedly cruel hands. Kyo might have been more appreciative towards the Sandaime Hokage if he hadn't left him behind on the streets. Maybe he'd made some stupid assumption that he had family to go to, or that child services would come and collect him, but neither ended up true. Child services had been overrun with tasks after the Kyuubi event, and though he was orphaned six years after the attack, it was still nothing but a giant mess of a department. Even now, twelve years after the Yondaime's death.
He'd been forgotten.
He gave a sigh of relief as the bell ended the day, and slowly followed the rest of the pupils out the door. His head was currently lowered in thought, his short, dark hair hiding his cutting, soul-gazing green eyes. Eyes that were unnerving to stare at for too long.
His feet left the academy grounds and sent him in a random direction as he pondered the coming exams. Besides the written test, there was also a practical assessment, which was either ninjutsu or taijutsu based, rarely both. He thought he could pass the jutsu test, if only barely. The Transformation was easy enough, the Replacement a bit tougher; his clones though were usually transparent more often than not. He'd work a bit more on it tonight, perhaps, but his small reservoir of chakra was really the problem. It was embarrassing, really, to know that he couldn't pump enough chakra into a weak a construct as a clone, but with a lineage that hadn't ever produced a single shinobi, it wasn't that much of a surprise.
Still, being a shinobi was pretty much the only way out of poverty in Konoha, or in Hidden Villages in general, and the Ninja Academy was the only school sponsored by the government, and that guaranteed work if you passed.
Taijutsu would really be the deciding point in his graduation, and he hoped it wouldn't come to that. Kyo was far from the best taijutsu practitioner in the class - all clan children were better than him, for example - but his chosen martial art had also played a part in his slow progress. Tai Chi, which was initially taught and learned through forms, or kata, were slow, deliberate and repeated motions that taught your body intricately how to move, attack, defend and so on. But it was extremely time-consuming, and required many, many years to learn and master. Kyo had started when he was seven, but though five years had given him a good foundation, there were also several parts that held him back. His lack of teachers, for example. He'd had to teach himself through books and intuition. The lack of sparring partners were another, and Kyo didn't really have that many friends, nor did he really actively try to find one. The only possible exception was Ren in the class behind him, but they lived kilometres apart and training opportunities were rare.
It didn't help that the academy demanded the use of the Academy Martial Art from anyone who didn't have a clan style, and it was a really basic 'hard' form that didn't fit a lean and flexible body like his. Exceptions required a handwritten note from one's guardian, and Kyo had none. Even if he had, convincing the teachers that an ancient art, learned only through a few mouldy manuals, was good enough for the shinobi profession... well, it was laughable.
He sighed again. At least they didn't have another written test. You had to pass three written exams throughout the year to be allowed to take the end-of-the-year practical, and he had passed those relatively well. Their difficulty level had been pathetically low, when even a slacker like Naruto, who usually skipped class, could pass. Not that he disliked the boy, far from it, but the truth was the truth.
Well, the exams were on Monday, which meant he at least had the weekend to practice. Maybe he could ask a chunin for advice on increasing his chakra pool?
Breathe in.
His right hand was raised slightly above his shoulders, the elbow bent in a V-shape, while he transferred the weight of his body to the right, back leg.
Breathe out.
His left foot took a step forward simultaneously as his weight transferred again, and his right hand pushed forward, his left hand resting at his hip.
The basic attack was but one little part of the long form, and Kyo kept his breathing slow and steady as he continued with the soft movements. His eyes were closed, and his naked feet moved easily over the grassy field with well practiced footwork. The form was the longest in the Yang Style of Tai Chi, one style of many, and he had spent years trying to master it. Long enough for his breathing to be natural and his mind to be focused, but also long enough for each movement to be precise and perfect; his body moving automatically without thought, the result of long ingrained habits.
To Kyo, Tai Chi was a work of art. An art which, if he could find someone to practice with, could make him a deadly combatant. There were many principles and secrets to it though, and he had but touched its surface. Yang Style had been his focus because it was more defensive and counter-based in nature; a defensive block in Tai Chi acted like a whip, meant to put the opponent out of balance to open for a deadly counter attack. The Chen Style, which he had learned but little of, was more explosive and attack based, but perfecting the first style had become a priority. Better with one style mastered than two mediocre ones, especially when he couldn't use either in combat yet.
He let out a calm breath as he finished the form, and his eyes opened to see the little place of nature outside his home-built cabin. His home wasn't large, but it was sturdy and made of thick wood to keep the cold from entering during winter. It had a thatched roof that had required many hours of work, and dozens of repairs, and a chimney made of rough stone was peeking up from one end. There was no electricity, though the river flowing five meters from the cabin at least gave him ample access to water. The winters in Konoha rarely became cold enough to freeze water, fortunately. The river broadened slightly into a circled area shortly after passing his home, ending with a small embankment that prevented bigger fish from passing through. It was his private little fishing spot, with which he could keep himself well fed when his excursion deeper into the woods didn't yield any game. What meat he didn't eat himself was exchanged for vegetables at Konoha's marketplace, where he'd been fortunate enough to find a stand willing to part with its vegetables. At first it had been charity, Kyo thought, but by now the owner of the stand had come to appreciate the exchange. Fresh meat not going through several hands before it reached the market stands were rare and cheaper as well. As for his clothes and other equipment, they were either things he'd made himself through skinning and woodwork, or he'd gotten it from Ren, his friend, whose uncle and guardian was a tailor.
The Tai Chi clothes he wore right now were one of such gifts. It was a thin, silky material with an intimidating red dragon on the back, made for easy movement and speed. He hoped the speed would make up for the lack of protection it offered.
Monday morning dawned and Kyo left his tiny cabin with a worried look. He hated exams and today was no exception. His feet lead him to the academy and into the classroom; early enough to find a decent seat, but late enough that the classroom was half full of nervous pupils. He preferred the seats all the way in the back, where he wouldn't gain attention from either the teachers, who he didn't trust, or from the most vocal children, whose attention was almost always bad. His physical and chakra grades were usually towards the bottom, and his written tests only mediocre, and he'd had his share of bullying and challenges to avoid through his stay here because of it. And losing to one would invite three more. Troublesome, to quote a certain Nara.
Naruto entered seconds before the exam started, and Kyo just shook his head in amusement. Iruka wasn't as subtle.
After a short rant about punctuality and respect to Naruto, the chunin gave a quick speech about the dangers and privileges of being a Konoha ninja to the whole class as he grabbed a sheet of paper from his desk.
"When I say your name, please step into the adjoining classroom for your jutsu test. You will be tested in all three; the Transformation, Replacement Technique and the Clone Technique."
Kyo thought it fortunate that it was ninjutsu and not taijutsu they'd be tested in.
Chouji went first, and Kyo tapped his fingers on his desk worriedly as one after another was called in. None of those who finished returned to the classroom, so he didn't know how well anyone had fared.
"Osamu Kyo!"
Hearing his name, Kyo left his seat reluctantly. It would be nice to get this over with. Nara Shikamaru exited as Kyo entered, and he could see a small smile on the boy's face. Not surprising however, as Shikamaru was smart.
"Kyo-san, please produce a Transformation first," Iruka said. Kyo took a deep breath, ignoring Mizuki who was walking restlessly by the door. The teachers were eager to get this over with as well, huh?
"Transformation!" He could feel the image focused in his mind encircle him, and after an approving nod from both his teachers, Kyo let it go.
"The Replacement Technique please," Mizuki growled, and Kyo noticed that Iruka threw the impatient teacher a glance as well. Iruka pointed at a log they'd placed in the classroom for the occasion, and went through the required handseals quickly and efficiently. There's seemed to be a drag, and for a moment both Kyo and Iruka thought he'd failed, before the 'pop' proved them both wrong. There was some uncertainty in Iruka's eyes, he could see, but the nod came, as did the instructions for the Clone Technique.
He knew he needed his concentration for this one.
Maybe...
Resolved to try, Kyo closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Meditation techniques he used during Tai Chi came to mind, and he employed them at the moment as best he could. His mind went blank, and a moment later a image of himself entered his mind.
"When you're ready!" came from Iruka's assistant, but Kyo was already too deep into his own mind to hear. The sound of rushing water finally reached his ears, and he pulled on it, willing the chakra to flow through his arms like the river it represented, and into the technique as his hands formed the seals.
"Clone Technique!"
He gave a sigh of relief as a solid-looking clone formed beside him, and released the jutsu when Iruka congratulated him. He'd made it.
Still, it had been close. The techniques were obviously slow and far from mastered, which Iruka's doubting eyes confirmed, but he'd passed. He wouldn't have to return to the academy again. No more tests.
Right?
Like Kyo, Akihito Ren considered himself fortunate as the exam commenced. Ren was in the year below Kyo, and had chosen to apply for an early attempt at the exam for a chance on being on his friend's team. Unlike Kyo though, Ren's written exams had been a borderline failure (there were things in them his class hadn't covered yet!), which was why it was such a relief that the practical was ninjutsu. The small boy, whose lavender hair and amber eyes gleamed eagerly at the teacher, considered ninjutsu to be his specialty. He could already imagine the awed look upon the teachers' faces when he completely threw the average, and his mouth quirked into his trademark smile at the thought.
"Akihito Ren!"
Ren didn't know the person who yelled, but he jumped out of his seat quickly, the dark-purple sheet - that Ren repeatedly informed his classmates was a professional cape - flowed behind him. In fact, just a glance could tell you that his outfit out-purpled even Yamanaka Ino's.
Almost skipping into the next room, Ren's cape gave a little extra snap because of his anticipation, and a corner of it attached itself to the door and closed it neatly behind him. He almost smiled at the looks on the examiners faces. He was going to blow them away!
"I'm Umino Iruka, Akihito-san, and I'll be your examiner today."
"Pleased to meet you, sir!" he chirped.
The chunin sent him a gentle smile as he unrolled the scroll before him. "Very well, please demonstrate the Clone Technique."
With a little hop, Ren made the monkey seal, the main hand-seal of the Clone Technique, and blurred from view as not one, but eight clones stepped out from his body and solidified into perfect replicas. More than that, the clones were arranged in a pentagram around the original, and each of them was acting differently; as if independent of their creator, when the clones usually just mimicked the original.
Even the white haired teacher stopped what he was doing to inspect the clones. Ren had to stop his cape from wrapping around himself in a hug, but it still fluttered in an nonexistent wind. It was Iruka-sensei who snapped out of his surprise first.
"Well done, Akihito-san! I don't think I've ever seen such mastery of the Clone Technique in a genin candidate. Now, the replacement, if you plea-"
Iruka stopped what he was saying, because he was talking to a log instead of a student. Ren waved at the teacher before replacing himself once again. No hand-signs, no smoke, nothing. One moment a log, the other a boy.
Ren was really, really proud of his replacement technique.
In fact, all of his escape techniques were flawless.
Iruka was smiling again, and Ren wished he'd had the man as his teacher. He seemed a whole lot nicer than Metsu-sensei.
"And lastly," the teacher said after jotting down something, "transformation."
Ren grinned and his cape wrapped round him as his shape wavered, and he became an identical copy of the Hokage, right down to the puff of smoke leaving the pipe.
His cape was extra snappy and he was actually skipping when he made his way out of the examination room. First things first, though, he needed to find his Uncle and exchange the blue cloth of his shiny new headband. Then he could find Kyo and drag him off to celebrate! Running now, he hoped he could make the trip and be back at the academy before his friend was done with his own exams.
The Hokage had briefly stopped by the academy to give a long speech about ninja responsibilities, but had left Iruka to inform of the team-placements. The old man probably had other classes to visit as well.
Naruto adjusted the headband on his head proudly, ignoring the curious glances from his classmates who'd been convinced he'd failed the exam. Well, technically he had failed the exam, but he'd made up for it after the tumble with Mizuki. And he had learned a cool clone technique to replace the annoying one.
Behind him Kyo was whispering to and poking Ren, whose "cape" was covering his head in his attempt to sleep through the Sandaime's long, dry speech.
Naruto turned to watch the sight curiously, laughing loudly in amusement when Ren's abrupt awakening managed to slap Kyo in the face. He hadn't seen the purple boy before though, but he recognized Kyo at least from his class. His eyes studied the weird newcomer for a few seconds. He looks like a tiny pixie! Naruto thought with a grin, and opened his mouth to say so.
The flying piece of chalk prevented that from happening.
Rubbing his sore head, he turned back to a glowering Iruka.
"Like I was saying," the teacher continued, while eyeing Naruto warningly, "Team seven will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura and Malaki Ryuu. Your sensei will be Hatake Kakashi." Naruto could feel his good mood disappearing at the loss of Sakura, but at least he wasn't on Sasuke's team.
"Team eight will be Inuzuka Kiba, Hyuuga Hinata and Aburame Shino, with Yuuhi Kurenai as sensei." O-okay. He wasn't going to be on Kiba's team either. That sucked as well. They'd had a lot of fun when skipping class, and he'd miss that. His back straightened as he remembered his promise to Iruka. He was a real shinobi now! He couldn't skip important things anymore! He missed the next part of the members on team nine, and hoped that it hadn't been him.
"Team ten will be Yamanaka Ino, Nara Shikamaru and Akimichi Chouji. You'll be with Sarutobi Asuma."
What the hell? Naruto was weirded out. What about him? Wasn't he going to be with any of the cool kids? Who was left? He started to glance around, but Iruka continued, and Naruto didn't want to miss his name.
"Team eleven is still active from last year, but team twelve will be Akihito Ren," Naruto noticed that the pixie behind him lifted his head in recognition, "Osamu Kyo," Ah! That was the name of the classmate that tried to wake the pixie! "And Uzumaki Naruto."
Naruto grinned. He hadn't been forgotten.
"Your jounin sensei will be Nara Shikaku." That seemed to get the attention of Shikamaru, who threw a pitying glance at Naruto, who didn't much like it. Come to think of it, isn't Shika's last name Nara? Maybe they know each other.
"You will be back in an hour to meet your new sensei, so suggest you spend the time getting to know your new teammates."
"I'm Naruto!" The blond grinned widely, "I'm twelve and I like ramen, training, ramen and nice people!" They were currently in one corner of the academy grounds. They'd brought their lunch with them and had settled down on the grass, turned towards each other.
Kyo's mouth twitched into a smile, and Ren seemed to study Naruto for several seconds. Amber eyes gazed into clear, blue ones, and it didn't take long before the impatient member of the team developed a twitch above his right eye.
"You have nice eyes." The comment was blurted out before Ren thought twice, and by the wide-open eyes on Naruto it had not been expected.
"Erh... thanks." Kyo hadn't seen Naruto stumped before, but the blond certainly didn't know how to respond to Ren's blunt honesty. He would have to get used to it, Kyo thought, slightly amused.
He broke the awkwardness by introducing himself. "My name is Kyo. Just Kyo, and I am twelve. I enjoy nature, meditation and taijutsu, and I value kindness, compassion and discipline." Naruto nodded eagerly, before turning to their last member.
Ren just blinked back at them, so Kyo gave him a poke to catch his attention.
"Oh! Yes! Of course! Right! Erh.. I'm Ren! I'm twelve in three months, I like throwing practice I suppose, because I'm kinda good at it, and I adore ninjutsu," that brightened Naruto's eyes as well, "and I'm currently working on a new version of my cape. It's gonna be grand, I tell you!" The blond looked confused, but Kyo just mouthed 'later', so as to not interrupt. Ren could go on for hours about his cape.
"My uncle is a tailor, and I live with him, and he tells the best jokes. I like jokes. And... hey! That's a pretty butterfly!"
Kyo just sighed as Ren's attention was drawn to the 'pretty' specimen, but couldn't help giving his friend a humorous smile. It must have been infectious, because a moment later they were all smiling and laughing together, even if Ren had no clue as to why.
Ren just liked to laugh.
Lunchtime was over and class had assembled and dissembled. Naruto, Kyo and Ren followed cautiously behind the tall, strange man that was their sensei, studying him. He had regular shinobi attire, nothing besides the norm. His hair was placed in a spiky ponytail, and he had a tiny beard as well, in addition to several large scars. He was quiet, serious, and had only asked them to follow.
He stopped outside the entry gates and turned towards them.
"I overheard your little exchange earlier today, so there's no need to repeat yourselves. I am Nara Shikaku, Nara-san or sensei to you. I enjoy a good drink, a game of shogi or go, and tend to grasp every opportunity to relax that arrives in my tedious work. My current title is Jounin Commander, and I only have one boss. The Sandaime Hokage."
Naruto goggled as Shikaku explained, and Ren was making gasping sounds at just the right moments. Kyo just nodded in acknowledgement, his mind swirling with questions. Why had they been given the Jounin Commander? As far as he knew they'd all had poor grades, and it wasn't as if the academy was looking for hidden potential. Was it because of Naruto? Did they want the best jounin to train the jinchuuriki? He didn't know. But there was a lot more to the Nara than met the eye, that was for sure. He noticed that his sensei was eyeing him with a calculating look, but he didn't know why.
"As for the plans for today... I want you all to meet me at Barracuda tonight at ten o'clock. It's a bar and restaurant not far from the main gate." He gave them all a small smile.
"You are all adults now, so I'm taking you out to celebrate your graduation. And don't worry about money; the drinks will be on me." He patted Naruto on the head, ignoring the blond's scowl, and dismissed them.
Kyo couldn't help but feel something was wrong.
When they entered the establishment at the agreed upon time it was filled to the brim with people. Their sensei waved them over to a table he'd occupied, and they reluctantly followed. Naruto was the recipient of several glares from both customers and waiters, but for once he wasn't thrown out. Tiny Ren was trying subtly to peek underneath one of the waitresses' short skirt as she passed, but Kyo grabbed his shoulder and pulled him along.
Ren made sure to give an appropriate pout in return.
"Sit down, we'll save the drinks for a bit later." Shikaku gestured towards the chairs, and then proceeded to unfold a shogi board on the table.
"Like I said earlier today, shogi is one of my favourite games. Any of you know how to play?"
Ren and Kyo raised a hand, but Naruto didn't.
"My uncle taught Kyo and me how to play several years ago, as he likes the game as well. I'm not very good though," Ren explained, though he still jumped into the seat across the Nara.
"That's just fine. Explain the rules to Naruto as well, and I'll allow you to play me as a team." An explanation did indeed commence, but Naruto had a hard time catching the nuances behind it all. Kyo only interrupted the explanations twice to force Ren back on the topic, and in the end the blond at least knew the basics of the basics, and the rest could be learned by watching.
The first game was lost after just a few moves, and the following lasted only a few minutes longer. The new team was forced to develop new strategies and work as a team to even catch a single piece from their sensei, but Shikaku seemed to enjoy himself just as much as they did, if the reoccurring laughter at their table meant anything. After an hour of playing, their sensei began to order drinks.
At first it was only a small glass of watered-out whiskey, which Naruto took in a single shot, but Kyo coughed and spat out. Ren seemed to take a sip out of everyone's cup but his own, and the little pixie was half-way drunk long before anyone else was even tipsy. The shogi games kept coming though, and Ren was the first to fall asleep, completely shit-faced. Kyo had done his best to temper his intake, but his hands had seemingly moved on their own at times, which was a ludicrous thought. He ended up with his face in the next glass of vodka, leaving only Naruto awake.
Nara Shikaku was certain this was Naruto's first, and maybe even last, drinking spree, but the boy kept it coming. Glass after glass passed down his throat, and in the end the Nara almost believed he'd get drunk before Naruto would.
He didn't. Naruto's head smacked into a half-finished shogi game, and Shikaku gave a relieved sigh. He hadn't predicted Naruto's stamina, it seemed, and the bill was going to cost him.
Well, it was time for the test, and he gave a quick gesture towards the owner, who approached him with several large mugs of water.
"Another team headed for failure, I take it?" The Nara nodded, and regretted the motion a second later. His wife was going to kill him for this. She never appreciated a good drink on a Monday evening. Well, that wasn't quite true.
She never appreciated a good drink, period.
He watched as the owner poured the mugs of water on the three unlucky children, and stood up, motioning for them to follow him out.
The three genin, soaked with water and each one as confused as the other, followed slowly, drunkenly, behind. As fresh air met their faces, they looked upon Shikaku with drooping eyes.
"The celebration is over and it's time to go home. I want each of you to meet me at training ground three tomorrow at five o'clock. As in five in the morning." They stared blankly back at him.
"Repeat what I just told you."
Naruto mumbled something first, but Shikaku caught the gist of it and nodded. As the other two followed, he gave them their only warning.
"If you don't show, you'll be sent back to the academy to repeat a year. Failure to obey orders will not be tolerated, is that understood?" Three confused pair of eyes stared back, and the Jounin Commander dismissed them.
It was best to get home quickly. He had to be at the training ground as well, unlikely as it was that the genin would be there.
What a drag.
Ren had trouble walking by himself, so Naruto, helpful even subconsciously, pulled the boy's arm over his shoulder and waved goodbye to Kyo, who stumbled and headed - zombified - towards his own cabin. Ren's home wasn't too far from his own, fortunately, though the lavender-boy's sense of direction meant they walked for much longer, and as they passed it he shoved Ren in the direction, giggling to himself as the boy tripped over his own feet and went face-first into the mud. It at least seemed to wake Ren up a little, which was enough for him to enter his own door.
"Five o'clock, five o'clock, five o'clock," Naruto muttered as he finally entered his own apartment, confused as to what the time meant, but knowing it was important. His head had cleared a little since they left the bar, and he fumbled with his alarm, setting it to four just in case. While he enjoyed his sleep, obeying orders were more important. He blinked at the thought and wondered faintly what those orders were. As his bed came into view, all other thoughts left his mind and he dropped, fully clothed, into the small piece of heaven, ignoring his watch that told that the time was now almost two. It would be a short night.
Naruto's fist slammed into the alarm two hours later, sending it into the wall with a crash. The alarm was as stubborn as him though, and kept getting louder and louder, forcing Naruto from his bed. His hands moved to remove the grit from his eyes while his feet lead him tiredly to the bathroom, absently stepping on the clock to silence it. His head was strangely heavy, he thought, and he stopped abruptly when the memories from the night before entered his mind, clear as day. The shogi games had been fun, as had the drinking challenge with his sensei, but the drinks didn't taste very good. They only made him dizzy. Maybe he could convince the old man to use soda next time? Fizzy drinks were much more fun.
He was about to yawn when his sensei's last words entered his mind.
"If you don't show, you'll be sent back to the academy to repeat a year." His eyes shot to the digital display on his alarm, which showed 04:12.
Uzumaki Naruto was no failure!
He rushed into the bathroom, ignoring the toothbrush and deodorant, but made sure to stop by the toilet. Why did they have to meet at five? Was it a mission? Missions were more important than freshening up, he decided, and grabbed a piece of fruit from his fridge before he headed out.
Maybe I should stop by Ren and Kyo's as well? He wasn't sure where Kyo lived though, but perhaps Ren knew. His home was on the way, anyway.
Ren's uncle did not appreciate being woken up at half-past four in the morning, of course, and Naruto spent at least another five minutes helping Ren get ready and into his shoes, before they headed for Kyo's place.
Naruto was confused, of course, when they entered the forest. Ren didn't answer his questions though, only pointed at the small cabin they found a few minutes later in a small grove. It was certainly a nice place, though it was pretty obvious that the home was... shabby, for a lack of better words.
"His parents live here?" Naruto asked. Confusion seemed to be his theme these days, and he didn't like it.
"His parents are dead, I think, like mine. He lives alone," Ren replied, very matter-of-factly.
Naruto didn't know if he should appreciate the newfound bond he found between himself and his teammates. It was terrible to not have parents, but it was nice to meet people who'd understand his own situation as well.
His thoughts were interrupted when they saw Kyo leaving his cabin, looking almost as bad as Ren did. Naruto was wide awake by now, and his head was no longer heavy either, but his mates looked like they'd been fighting for days. And lost.
"C'mon!" Naruto said, grabbing the sleepy Kyo and setting off towards training ground three.
Shikaku glared at the book in his hand, wishing the words would stay still and let themselves be read. His head was pounding away, and his wife had not been all that understanding of the situation. This was the last time he went through this test, and old Sarutobi would just have to find a new jounin to take his place.
He let out a sigh and shut the book.
He wasn't particularly fond of failing genin, but that had been his job after each Genin Exam for the last ten years. The sixty-six percent failure rate increased the competition value at the ninja academy, or so the teachers claimed. Shikaku wasn't convinced. Most academy students weren't even told of this after-genin test, even if the statistics were available. Still, if every academy student had become genin, the death-rate would have been horrifying. Not everyone was worthy, and there was also the odd child-spy to be rooted out. Iwa in particular was fond of sending children to do an adult's job, which was one of many reasons why their relationship never went from truce to ally. Iwa had quantity though, not quality, which made it easier to prevent success by only accepting the best of the best. He knew of three attempts of infiltration just in the last year, and all of them had washed out.
It was also one of the many reasons that advanced techniques and teachings weren't taught in the academy. When they became genin, it would be up to the jounin to find the odd child-spy and prevent their enemies from attaining their secrets. Konoha was very particular about who they taught advanced skills to, but clan-children often bypassed the system because of it. Clans had already established a certain loyalty to Konoha, and it was also one of the reasons why clan-children were grouped together in teams. It would enable their teachers to trust them quicker, teach them better, as well as prevent leakage of Konoha secrets.
It wasn't his job to judge the educational system anyway.
He glanced at his wristwatch, a birthday gift from his son.
04:56.
A few more minutes and he could go home and rest, if only for a few more hours before his wife demanded his attention again. The book was returned to a small satchel he'd fastened to his back, but he looked up as the rustling sound of bushes entered the area.
There, jumping out from the bushes with a wide smile and loud laughter was Uzumaki Naruto. His faint hope that the boy was alone was crushed when the other two stumbled upon the area a few seconds later.
He glanced at his watch.
04:59.
Well, he'd be damned.
The Nara observed that the Hokage watched the jounin standing at attention curiously, obviously wondering which children passed and which didn't this year. Shikaku had made sure to tell Kakashi that the meeting was two hours before it actually was, which had ensured - this time - that the jounin was on time. His face was as much an enigma as usual, so he couldn't see whether or not he'd approved his team, but the glowing face of Kurenai at least let him know that she'd accepted hers. Asuma was as calm as always, though the twitching fingers meant he was longing for a smoke, which by the Hokage's sudden glare meant he was not allowed. Gai wasn't here, fortunately, but Genma, Ibiki and Chouza were. There should have been more jounin here, but most had probably informed the old man yesterday after their test.
"Kurenai-san?" the Hokage asked, gesturing for her to start.
"They passed with flying colours. They have much potential," she replied, both boastful and prideful.
"Asuma-san?"
"Passed," the man replied, showing no interest in elaborating. The Hokage nodded and turned towards Kakashi.
"Kakashi-san?" Shikaku leant forward a bit as he saw the jounin remove his book from sight, and raised an eyebrow when he could see the frown. This wasn't typical Kakashi.
"No, and yes." That didn't really tell anyone anything.
"Elaborate, please, Kakashi-san." Sarutobi Hiruzen leant forward slightly, as surprised as the rest that the copy-nin hadn't failed the team outright.
"I gave them the bell-test, which they failed. The team showed... well, no ability to work as a team. That said, all have incredible potential, especially Sasuke. I want to take the team, but I'm not sure they're ready." Kakashi rarely showed uncertainty, so Shikaku suspected there was some sort of history that interfered with his judgement. Most likely with the Uchiha, since it was the only kid mentioned by name.
"Most of us do not look for teamwork on the first day," Asuma made sure to add. "If they don't know each other too well, it's only natural to work individually. If the problem is arrogance, however, then you'll have to judge if you're capable of humbling the person yourself."
Kakashi gave a shrug, which Shikaku knew meant he wouldn't reveal anything else.
"It's up to you, Kakashi. You have been hard on every team you've tested. If you think this one has the potential, I'd seriously think twice about your decision," the Hokage said, and Kakashi seemed to think for a moment, before sighing.
"I'll take them. I'll just have to be harsh on the teamwork part, I suppose." Nodding in acceptance, the Hokage turned towards the other jounin.
"Genma?"
"Failed, spectacularly at that." Shikaku smirked. Genma had used the same test for his failures as himself, and usually managed to stuff his students with enough alcohol to make them abhor drinking for the rest of their life. The Barcade, the bar which Genma favoured, was famous for its strong spirits. As well as its arcade machines, but that was beside the point.
"Ibiki?"
"Failed. Couldn't go past the first torture-cell without puking." Ibiki liked his psychological tests, but they were usually effective as well. Difference was, Shikaku's failures usually went back to the academy; Ibiki's failures quit being a ninja forever. It also served the purpose of "improving" Ibiki's reputation.
"Chouza?" The large man was munching on his chops, only pure skill and experience preventing it from messing up the floor on the Hokage's office.
"Fail." He had used the drinking test as well.
"Shikaku?" The Hokage asked absently, marking the failed students on his paper with a scratch of his pen.
"Passed."
"Good, then we..." the Hokage's head snapped back to the Jounin Commander, the old eyes wide in surprise. The other jounin turned their heads as well, and if they hadn't been in the Hokage's office, Shikaku was sure there would have been yelling.
"What happened?" The Nara wasn't sure who asked the question, but saw fit to answer it anyway.
"I spent most of my evening at the Barracuda with my team, having them team up against me in shogi. They showed remarkable teamwork by the way," he added, "then I had the establishment start sending the drinks. Akihito Ren was drunk and passed out after half-an-hour, though the other two lasted a lot longer. I had to use my shadow to force Osamu Kyo to drink enough to pass out, but Naruto kept me going for hours. The boy had a bottomless pit, I assure you," he said dryly, "but he, too, passed out in the end. I had some water poured on them; only enough to wake them up, and then informed them that if they didn't show up at five in the morning at training ground three, they'd fail and be returned to the academy." Most of the jounin nodded, but Kurenai frowned.
"Why did you get them drunk? Couldn't you have given them some other test?"
Shikaku shrugged.
"I could have, I suppose, but the test was specifically invented for the purpose of failing genin in a believable way. It tests willpower and determinism, as well as listening skills and, well, alcohol intolerance." He glanced at Ibiki, who smirked.
"Anko was the originator of the idea," the torture specialist confirmed.
"How many of you, professional shinobi and adults, could have woken up two hours after going to bed when you're completely shit-faced?" None of the jounin dared step forward, so Shikaku continued, "and how many of you would have thought of your team first, and ensured the others could be there on time a well?" No one answered. "There's also the factor that neither really knew each other, so finding their houses in time would also be difficult."
"So what made them pass?" This came from Kakashi.
"They showed up, that's what. Mostly due to the Uzumaki kid, I believe. He didn't show any lingering effects from the previous night."
The Hokage chuckled at the faces in his office, and gave Shikaku a nod of approval.
"If they truly passed Anko's test for failures, then they deserve it. Still," the old man ruffled through some papers before he found what he was looking for.
"Akihito-san had terrible written scores, which isn't too unusual for those trying out on the early exam I suppose, but good ninjutsu skills. Osamu-san's written exams were mediocre, and his ninjutsu exam was almost failed. Naruto's written exams were abysmal, as was his ninjutsu. While the Shadow Clones make up for some of his scores, this is still a pretty weak team. Are you sure, Nara-san?"
The shadow-user nodded. As Jounin Commander, Nara Shikaku wasn't supposed to be a jounin-sensei. In fact, his job was to fail the team assigned to him without question. It was a real drag, of course, but they sure as hell didn't take the blond brat into consideration. And how could he fail a team that showed that much promise?
"There are a few non-negotiable requests from me if this is going to be the case," the Hokage continued, and Shikaku held his tongue. "For one, they may not apply for the first Chunin Exam. You are the Jounin Commander, and you carry a large part of Konoha's reputation on top of you. If you were to pass a team, and they were to come out as failures, not only would Konoha suffer, your own reputation - and that of your clan - would as well. If we ignore for the moment that you have tedious enough duties as commander," he continued, "then these genin will still take up a lot of your time. They will be expected to make a good showing at the following Chunin Exam, and I will not tolerate any slacking."
Genma spoke up before Shikaku could agree; "how do you expect them to fulfill the mission quota? You'll have trouble training them and doing missions in addition to your normal tasks."
"I am fully capable of giving out 'D' to 'B' ranks myself, you know," Shikaku replied, slightly annoyed, "and there's a lot they can do for me in the office that won't require the standard D-ranks. For example," he said, his mouth forming a smirk, "I won't need to stand in line for the message-hawks anymore. I can just send my genin instead. I'll bring them with me during investigations and arrests, so they'll get their chances to shine. While I'm too busy to step beyond Konoha's walls," he added, "that doesn't mean there aren't dozens of crimes happening within."
"Besides," he shrugged, "this will teach them the ins and outs of Konoha. We have numerous shinobi ready to go to war in the field, but how many defenders do we have? How many are vigilant and observant when they're back in Konoha? How many are responsible for evacuations, holding the line, protecting the treasury, etcetera, etcetera? After the Uchiha were slaughtered, Konoha's police-work fell to me. I'm understaffed as it is, and it will be nice to have a few apprentices."
~Chapter End~