South Park © Matt & Trey.

I am trying my hand at writing something silly for a change. It truly was a challenge. So these were basically drabbles in a brainstorm folder. I didn't know what to do with them, so I tweaked them to form a bit of a story. I also decided to make Kyle the artist this time, rather than Kenny.

So come on baby don't be shy,
And let's begin
And I'll take off your clothes
Cause everyone knows
You like me, it shows
And you know how it goes
If you take off your clothes
We'll see how it grows
I just wanna know

Morningwood

1.

Kyle Broflovski sighs as he stares at his computer screen. An array of nude men and women stare back at him. Cocks, balls, tits and bush of course. You can't forget the bush. He taps his pencil against his lower lip a few times before beginning to draw the outline of a body in his sketchbook. Jesus Christ. How is he going to do this? He's tried about a hundred times and he just can't get it right. He's up to his head and about ready to just strip himself down and draw his own body in the mirror. How's that for inspiration? Not great. He'd really like to avoid getting that desperate. The thought of his teacher seeing the final result is all too unsettling.

"Kyle, are you looking at porn?" a sudden voice asks with a scandalized gasp. "Naughty boy!"

Kyle lets out a shriek, the pencil flinging out of his hands before he spins around, mouth agape. "What the hell are you doing in my room?" he snaps as he takes in the smug expression Kenny McCormick is wearing.

The blond simply shrugs. "Just thought I'd stop by and see how my favorite redhead is doin'. Ike let me in."

"Hmph…" Kyle frowns, picking up his pencil. "A warning would be nice next time… and it isn't porn. It's art."

"I see boobs and dicks," the blond notes, pushing his bangs out of his eyes and examining the computer screen more closely. "Looks like porn to me. You are scarring my virgin eyes with your evil smut."

Kyle laughs loudly, "There is nothing virginal about you."

Kenny gives his friend a solemn glance. "That hurts me, Kyle. That hurts me real deep."

"This is art, Kenny," Kyle repeats dryly, not buying his friend's façade for a second.

"Art, porn… Can't the two be similar?"

Kyle sighs. "Kenny… Nudity doesn't always have to be sexual."

"Ah, well, maybe I'm too corrupted. I can't look at it any other way."

"Clearly…" Kyle mumbles, setting his pencil and sketchbook on the desk.

"So why are you looking up this stuff anyway?"

"Art class," the redhead frowns.

"Art class?" Kenny asks.

"I'm in advanced art and the teacher wants us to work on anatomy…"

"Well, I'll be your live model!" he gladly volunteers, giving Kyle a lewd grin.

Kyle raises an eyebrow. "Really?" he asks suspiciously.

"Yeah, sure, if it'll help. I just turned eighteen, so it's totally legal," the blond winks.

"It would help to have a live model…" Kyle says slowly, eyes narrowing at his friend. "What do you want in return?"

"Aw, come on, I'm not Eric Cartman. This is a genuine, once-in-a-lifetime offer. Get it while it's hot. "

"You're offering to strip down right here and let me draw your naked body?" Kyle specifies in a deadpan.

"Yep!" Kenny grins, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Well, all right," Kyle crosses his arms. "Shut the door and take off your clothes."

Kenny smirks. "You sound pretty eager, Kyle."

"Just strip," he snorts.

Kenny shamelessly does as he's told. He takes his socks off first before unzipping his hoodie and tossing it unceremoniously to the floor.

"Damn, Kenny," Kyle cuts in as he watches. "You're really going to get naked for me, aren't you?"

"Well, yeah," he winks, tugging his t-shirt off. "Like I said, anything to help a friend."

"Right, here's altruism at it's finest," Kyle says dryly as he watches Kenny unbutton his jeans and pull them down. He has severe doubts that this is purely a selfless offer. After spending years alongside the other male, he's grown used to his blasé sexual expression. He isn't above using his body to get what he wants.

"So," the blond says as he fingers the rim of his boxes. "You gonna draw me like one of your French girls?"

Kyle snorts. "Right."

Kenny chuckles. "How do you want me to pose?"

"I want to do a simple standing pose first, and then we can get into the harder stuff."

Kenny immaturely snickers at Kyle's use of the word "harder" before dropping his shorts. "Like what you see?" he asks, chortling as he swings his hips back and forth.

"Kenny…" Kyle pales. "Do not do that." Though, if he was forced to be honest, he would have to admit that he does like what he is seeing. He likes it quite a lot… However, he won't say that. He needs to be professional. This is art practise and it needs to be taken seriously. "Stand straight and don't move," he commands as he picks up his sketchbook, flipping to a new page.

"Gotcha," Kenny says, standing still. "Am I allowed to talk?"

"Yes… but don't move your body," Kyle mumbles, picking up his pencil.

"Okay, okay."

Kyle allows himself to rake over every inch of Kenny. He really is a good looking guy… especially once the sloppy clothes are off. Kyle couldn't possibly think of a better model. "All right," he murmurs to himself as he begins to draw the outline of Kenny's slender shape.

2.

Kenny talks the entire time, just as Kyle knew he would. The blond always suffers from the most persistent case of verbal diarrhea at the worst of times. "Hey, so how is it coming along?" he asks after finishing another tirade.

"Good…" Kyle murmurs. "I'm just about finished."

From his standing position, Kenny watches Kyle's look of concentration and the way he pencil moves in his hand.

"Okay," Kyle announces. "I'm finished. You can come look if you want."

Kenny saunters towards the redhead, glancing down at the sketch on the page. "Hell, Kyle," he says, "that's really damn good!"

"Thanks," Kyle smiles down at the picture. Even he has to admit it's pretty damn good. Perhaps all he needed was the right inspiration.

"I look pretty hot," the blond admires.

Kyle laughs, "Well, you are a good looking guy."

"Oh, Kyle, you flatter me so," Kenny simpers while Kyle just rolls his eyes. "There's just one minor thing…" he adds

"And what's that?" Kyle asks dryly, feeling like he has an idea of what Kenny is about to say.

"You made my dick too small!" he exclaims.

Kyle snorts back a laugh. He knew this would be Kenny's complaint. "No, Kenny. I made it the exact right size." He was paying awfully close attention, after all. Kyle is very serious about his art.

Kenny simply snickers.

"So, you better get dressed," the redhead says, setting his sketchbook and pencil back down. "We can do more tomorrow."

"Hm," Kenny muses with a slight smile, "not just yet."

"Ohoh. Is this the part where you try and seduce me?" Kyle asks expectantly, standing up and stretching his long limbs.

"Maybe," Kenny shrugs. "Why? Think it'll work?"

"I don't know," Kyle crosses his arms.

"Well, you know me. I like a challenge." He places a hand on Kyle's chest and allows it to travel down south. "Well," he whispers, "by the feel of things, looks like it won't be much of a challenge after all." And with that, he doesn't hesitate to push the redhead back onto the bed and unzip his jeans.

3.

Kenny slowly sinks onto Kyle's lap, letting out a quiet, pleasured moan. Kyle watches the blond and his expression – the way his eyebrows draw together, the way his lips part ever so slightly, the way his eyelashes flutter. They don't break eye contact, and for both of them it feels incredibly personal, like nothing they've ever experienced before.

Suddenly, there is a knock on the door and they are both forced to snap back to reality. "Kyle, can I borrow your graphing calculator?" comes Ike's young voice.

"Uh..hnng…" Kyle groans. "Y-yes… in few minutes!"

Kenny smiles deviously, lifting his hips before grinding back down.

"Kyle!" Ike yells. "Just give it to me!"

"Fuck," Kyle hisses quietly. "Not now, Ike!" he shouts, beyond irritated.

"But I need it!" Ike wines. He decides to open the door, immediately making a face of horror when he notices the compromising position his big brother is in.

Kenny's jaw drops. "Oh, shit," he laughs, finally pausing.

Ike's jaw drops as well and he lets out a high pitched scream at the sight of Kenny McCormick impaling himself on Kyle's dick. "No, no, no, hell no!" he shouts. Before either Kyle or Kenny can say a word, the little Canadian slams the door shut and runs down the hallway, still shrieking.

"Well… we probably scarred him for life," Kenny snorts, rolling his hips again. "We'll lock the door next time."

"Oh, next time?" Kyle raises an eyebrow.

"You know you'll want more," he winks. "True friends happily give and take the cock."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really," Kenny insists. "You aren't true friends until you've had a gay experience."

Kyle just chuckles at that. True enough.

4.

After the hump-fest, Kenny lifts himself off of Kyle's lap and lies down next to him so they're side by side, still covered in spooge. "You'll have to wash your sheets," he says.

"That's fine," Kyle says, letting out a content sigh. "I don't know why I let you do that," he admits, turning his head to glance at the blond.

"Because you like me," Kenny grins.

"Yeah, I guess so," Kyle snorts. "Though, I'm not entirely sure why."

Kenny rolls his eyes. "I'm plenty desirable," he insists before asking, "Was that your first time doing something like that?"

"You wish," he chuckles. "I did used to date Bebe, you know."

"Right," Kenny laughs. "She adored you."

"She adored my ass," Kyle corrects in a humoured tone. "She was into some different shit, that's for sure. One time I was lying on my back and she pulled my pants down and gave me a hickey on my butt." He chuckles at the memory.

"Jesus Christ!" Kenny exclaims, chortling. "Kyle, in due time I promise I will do things to your ass that Bebe never dreamed of."

Kyle laughs at that. "Can't wait."

Kenny just smiles. "Oh, Bebe."

"Nice girl," Kyle adds as an afterthought.

"One of the best," Kenny agrees.

"She never made me use a condom," Kyle mentions. "That kind of screwed me over because now I never want to wear one."

"I didn't make you use one either."

"True." They lie together until they hear a door open on the main floor. "My parents are home," Kyle announces, sitting up. The two of them get cleaned up and dressed before going downstairs to greet Sheila and Gerald.

Kenny holds up a hand and smiles while Kyle says, "Hi, Mum, Dad."

"Hello, boys," they greet.

Ike is sitting in the living room with his head down. He flushes once he spots Kyle and Kenny. "Can I have that calculator now?" he asks tersely.

Kenny laughs loudly and Kyle runs a hand down his face. "Shit," he mumbles.

"Language!" Sheila chides offhandedly.

What a day. "I oughtta get home," Kenny says, smiling sheepishly as he slips his boots back on. "See you tomorrow?"

"Sounds good," Kyle says knowingly, returning the smile with one of his own.

"Until then...!" Kenny winks at him before leaving and Kyle waves him off before finally going to get Ike that darn calculator.

-Fin-