Disclaimer: I don't Harry Potter or anything to do with it. It all belongs to the wonderful J.K Rowling.
Authors Note: This story has been blocking up my brain for a while, so I decided to write it down in hope of leaving room for my other stories. Its a bit out there, so let me know whether I should continue posting.
CHAPTER ONE
Hermione Granger awoke with a start. Breathing heavily, she sat up, her wand gripped tightly in her hand as she surveyed the darkness covering the 2nd Year Girls Dorm.
Once making sure there was no danger, Hermione flopped back down on her pillow. That dream again. It had been a regular occurrence since Hermione had returned to Hogwarts and no matter how many times she had it, she was always left with a dirty, used feeling.
Deep down, a small part of Hermione knew what was occurring in these dreams, what someone was forcing her to do. However, she was in denial and come morning would put it at the back of her mind, not to be thought of again until the early hours of the next morning.
Hermione had considered talking to Madame Pomfrey or Professor McGonagall, but it had slipped her mind after the attack on Mrs. Norris at Halloween and the decision to find out whether Malfoy was the heir of Slytherin.
With a sigh, Hermione rolled to her side, sliding her wand under her pillow as she mentally began going over what she needed to do in order to start brewing the Polyjuice Potion
Groaning, Hermione stood up, wiping her mouth with a bit of toilet paper, before flushing the toilet. Moving out of the stall and over to the sink, Hermione surveyed her reflection. She was pale with dark circles under her eyes. Leaning over, she turned on the tap and rinsed her mouth to the get the taste of vomit out of her mouth. This being sick business was becoming a regular occurrence. It was now twice a week. Add that to how tired she had been lately and all the headaches, Hermione began to think maybe she should see Madame Pomfrey.
After, after I finish the Polyjuice Potion. She told herself.
December 11th 1992
I can't deny this any longer. Hermione thought to herself.
Weeks had passed by since the dreams first started and that with everything else pointed to what she had been in denial about for so long. She was done immersing herself in her studies, research about the Chamber of Secrets and worrying about Harry and last night's incident at the Duelling Club. She needed to know for sure.
"Miss Granger, what appears to be the problem?" Madame Pomfrey asked the young girl in front of her, who was look rather peaky.
Hermione swallowed hard, staring at her shoes. "I…I think I was…" she trailed off, not sure if she could say the word she had kept pushed back at the back of her mind. Madame Pomfrey waited patiently, sensing the young girls growing distress.
Clearing her throat, Hermione finally got the words out. "I think I…was…raped." She stifled a sob and Madame Pomfrey look scandalized. She knelt down in front of Hermione.
"What do you mean think?" she asked, trying to stay calm.
Hermione shuddered, as she suppressed a sob. "I keep having nightmares….someone holding me down…hurting me." She wiped a tear away. "I can't…see their face. But I know I know what they are doing to me. I know it's happened. I just do."
"You can't remember when it happened?" Madame Pomfrey asked, knowing she would need to call the Headmaster and Professor McGonagall soon. Hermione shook her head. The matron nodded, filled with a sense of dread. This was not good. "Please lay back Miss Granger, I would like to run some tests."
With a nod, Hermione laid back down on the bed she was seated on. Madame Pomfrey pulled out her wand and waved it over Hermione, murmuring spells, praying to the gods that this young girl was just suffering from over imaginative nightmares.
The results of the spells left a lump in Poppy Pomfrey's throat and she held back a sob. Hiding this from Miss Granger, Poppy turned and headed to the fire place, summoning the Headmaster and Miss Granger's Head of House, Minerva.
"What appears to be the problem Poppy?" Albus asked, noticing the sober expression on his matron's face. Poppy glanced over her shoulder at Hermione who was watching them with a blank expression on her face. Flicking her wand, Poppy closed the curtain surrounding Hermione's bed, before beckoning the other witch and wizard to follow her into her office.
"Poppy, what is the matter?" Minerva asked.
Closing the door, Poppy turned to face them, tears in her eyes. "Miss Granger came to me. She informed me that she believed she had been raped; only that she had no memory of it." Minerva gasped and Albus looked solemn. "I cast a few diagnostic spells." She paused, taking a moment to compose herself before continuing. "That girl is no longer a virgin and…"
"And what?" Albus asked.
Tears filled the matron's eyes again. "Miss Granger is with child."
Silence filled the room. "With child." Minerva said in a deadly whisper. "That thirteen year old girl is pregnant."
Poppy nodded sadly. "16 weeks gone." She informed them
"16 weeks would take us back to the summer break." Albus said, stroking his beard. "Possibly around the time Miss Granger visited Diagon Alley with Harry and Mr. Weasley."
"So a wizard did this to her?" Minerva asked and Albus nodded.
"I will know more once I investigate further." He said. "I'll ask Miss Granger if I may use Legilimancy on her, to see the memories for myself. Maybe it's more psychological than magical."
Madam Pomfrey nodded. "I think that will be safe for both mother and child at this stage."
Albus sighed and turned to the door, Poppy and Minerva followed him. Hermione was sitting on the bed, watching the teachers as they approached her. "Miss Granger." Albus began in a gentle voice.
"Yes Headmaster." Hermione replied in a quiet voice, feeling queasy.
"Would you mind if I use Legilimancy on you?" he asked in the same gentle voice.
Hermione felt tears well up. "I'm pregnant. Aren't I?" she asked.
Albus nodded sadly and Hermione bit her lip, looking away, trying not to cry out loud. "I want to see if your memories have been erased or just pushed to the back of your mind." He told her.
Hermione looked down at her stomach. "Madame Pomfrey has told me it will be safe." Albus said. Hermione looked up at him for a moment before nodding. "Very well. I want you to look me in the eye." Drawing his wand, Albus pointed at Hermione and whispered "Legilinins"
There was silence as Albus searched Hermione's mind, before pulling out. "The memories are there, but there are parts of them missing. I couldn't see the person who did this." He said in a sad voice.
Hermione nodded, still trying not to cry. "What now?" she asked, her voice breaking, looking between the Professors and matron.
"That is up to you my dear." Albus said.
Poppy cleared her throat. "I'm afraid it's too late for an abortion…" she began but Hermione cut her off.
"Abortion wouldn't be an option even if I found out earlier." Hermione told her. She glanced down at her stomach again. "It's not…its fault." She said softly, sounding like she was talking more to herself then the others in her presence. She returned her gaze to the adults. "May I please be excused? I need some time to process this."
"Of course." Albus said. Madame Pomfrey looked like she was going to complain but Dumbledore gave her a look and she closed her mouth.
Hermione slid off the bed and walked out quickly with her eyes on the ground, unable to take the looks from the adults. She had to get out of there and think.
Ignoring the students surrounding her, Hermione hurried through the castle and back to her dorm room, where she pulled the curtains around her bed and laid down, staring at the canopy.
'Pregnant. I'm thirteen years old and I'm pregnant.' Hermione thought to herself. It was surreal. If Madam Pomfrey hadn't confirmed it, Hermione would have gone on living in denial.
Biting her lip as tears filled her eyes; Hermione began to wonder what she was going to do. How was everyone going to react when they found out she was pregnant? Her parents, Harry and Ron, would they believe that she had been raped? Was she going to keep the baby or give it up? Would Professor Dumbledore make her leave school? What else was going to happen in her pregnancy? When would she stop throwing up? How long did she have before she started showing?
All these thoughts flying through her head were giving her a headache. 'I don't want to think about this anymore.' She thought; as she turned to her side and let the sleep that she had realized was looming take her over.
***Dream***
Hermione surveyed herself in the mirror before her. She looked older then she did when she had fallen asleep, like she was in her twenties or thirties. "That's strange" she thought to herself.
A door to her right opened and a young girl stepped in. She looked to be in her late teens, possibly even early twenties. The first thing Hermione noticed was that she was wearing a wedding dress that was reminiscent of the clothes worn by Ancient Roman noblewomen. Her chocolate brown hair was swept up in a messy bun with wisps falling down around her beautiful face.
The girl walked over to Hermione. "Goddess Mum, I am so nervous." She said.
Mum? Hermione took a closer look at the girl, finding her eyes, nose and mouth on the girls face.
"You'll be fine babe." Hermione heard herself say, her voice a little deeper then it was now. She had taken the girl's hand and was staring into her face, feeling as if her heart was about to burst from the love and happiness she was feeling.
The girl smiled at her and pulled her into a tight hug. There was a knock on the door and both women pulled away as it opened.
"It's time." Hermione almost fell over when she saw Professor Snape. He looked different. His hair was cut shorter with streaks of grey. His face wasn't as pale and he was wearing glasses, and a set of charcoal grey robes.
Her daughter smiled. "Thanks Severus." She said. "We'll be there in a minute."
Snape gave a smile, a genuine smile, before her left, closing the door behind him. Hermione turned to her daughter, who was grinning widely. She let out a breath. "I can't believe in under an hour I will be Mrs. Mikaela Jasmine-."
BANG!***
Hermione jolted awake as the door to the dorm flew opened and her dorm mates entered talking loudly. Rubbing her eyes, Hermione glanced at her watch, realizing she had missed afternoon. Surprisingly enough, she didn't care. She was still reeling from the dream she had just had. Was that truly her daughter? The baby she was carrying inside her at this very moment. Hermione's hand went to her stomach and she looked down, noticing for the first time, the small, hard bump that sure wasn't there last summer.
Hermione remembered the end of the dream, when her daughter had said her name, Mikaela. Her favourite grandfather's name was Michael, maybe that's why she chose the name.
"Is that your name?" Hermione asked softly. "Mikaela?"
Hand still on her stomach, Hermione laid back down and let out a sigh. What did the dream mean? Was it showing her what would happen if she decided to keep the baby? Life didn't look bad. Both she and her daughter seemed happy. Mikaela was getting married if the dream was anything to go on.
'I'm only thirteen. How can I raise a baby and still go to school?' Hermione's logical side asked as she realised where her train of thought was going.
'I'll figure something out.' The irrational side of her brain answered. 'The question is would I be able to give up a child I have carried for nine months?'
The logical side had an answer to that. 'Yes, it would be hard. But be reasonable. The baby would be better off with people who can take care of her. People who can provide for her.'
'I could take care of the baby and get some sort of a job. I could provide for her.' The irrational side said. 'There are books on raising children and I'm the top of my year. I could do this.'
'You know that there is only so much that books can teach you.' Logic set in. 'Did you learn nothing from learning to fly a broomstick.'
'There is a difference between raising a child and learning to fly a broomstick.'
"Oh shut up the both of you." Hermione mumbled to herself, knees drawn up to chest and head resting on the knees by this point. 'Whether I decide to keep Mikaela or give her up is something I can decide closer to the birth. My main priority should be making sure she's healthy and strong.' Hermione thought to herself. 'And that means seeing Madame Pomfrey'
Pushing the curtains aside, Hermione found that during her internal argument, Lavender and Parvati had left the dorm. Good, she didn't want to deal with them at the moment.
As she made her way to the door, Hermione felt her stomach turn and bile rise up in her throat. Crap. Dashing for the bathroom, she made it just in time to throw up in the toilet. Yep, definitely need to find out when morning sickness stops.
-AN- You've already read it so please review.