Hey guys! I'm horrible at author's notes, I never know what to write. So, all I wish is that you enjoy!

All I felt was cold. It was seeping through my veins. Clawing at my heart. Tearing my soul apart.

I no longer felt any emotion. The happiness and the joy I had once felt was gone. Even anger didn't reach me anymore. Every now and then a twinge of sadness would appear, but even that emotion was disappearing.

All that was left of me was a void. A deep black desolate hole where my soul used to be.

I knew that nobody knew what was going on with me, for years of training had taught me how to hide what I was feeling inside. They all thought that I was the same Merlin that had come to Camelot all those years ago.

But it wasn't as if I didn't deserve what was happening to me, for I am just a murderer.

Hundreds upon thousands of people have died because of me. I've ended up killing people close to me, and people that I have never even met.

I killed Freya, my one and only love, because I was stupid and didn't get her out of the castle in time. If I had just been quicker, then she never would've died.

I killed Will, my first friend, all because I was stupid enough not to be standing next to Arthur when the bandit invaded my home village and tried to shoot an arrow at him. If stood next to Arthur like I was supposed to, then Will wouldn't be dead

I killed Blainor, my father that I had only just met, because I was stupid enough to let him protect me when Cendrids men attacked. If I hadn't of let him protect me, then he never would've died

I even killed the good side of Morgana, a dear friend, all because I was stupid enough to not help her while she was discovering her magic. If I had just been there for her, then she would still be here.

I have even killed hundreds of nights, and subconsciously murdered thousands of Camelot citizens because I was stupid enough to let the Great Dragon free, or not be there for Morgana.

My actions have killed so many people, and ruined so many lives, that my will to live is fading away. Why in the world did I deserve to be alive if I was the cause of so many lost lives, and so many ruined dreams?

All that's left of the carefree naive boy I used to be, is a shell of my former self.

I deserve it though, for I am just a murderer.

Thanks for reading!

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