So, this is my first FanFiction! I was desperate for some Sherlolly, so I decided to write one by myself.
English is NOT my native language, so please feel free to mention any mistakes you might find. I feel that a Sherlock-FF somehow needs to be in English, so this is why.
Anyway, enjoy this short piece and please review! :)
Sentiment
He wasn't sure were this would take him. He really had no idea. This, clearly, was none of his areas. It was something new. Something scary. Something he had always believed to be a "defect, found only on the side of the weak."
Weak?
No, she definitely was not weak. He could see this now.
She stood there, right in front of him, those big brown eyes gazing up to him, shining with un-shed tears. But still, there she stood. Not moving an inch away from him, demanding an answer. An answer of which he had no idea how to give it. This really wasn't his area.
Sentiment.
Emotions.
And l… no! He couldn't even male himself think the word! It was just so unreal!
He, the great Sherlock Holmes!
But still…
The question still hung in the room, unanswered.
Why? Why did he do this?
Why did he kiss Molly Hooper? The pathologist? His pathologist?
He had no idea.
It just felt so right. In this moment, when she had bent over to give him whatever I was he demanded to look at through the microscope.
She had been so close…she had smelled so good…
And then he had touched her shoulder. She had looked up to him, and when their eyes got locked, for this short moment, all he could do was to murmur "Thank you", and then all he knew was that there had been this urgent feeling to kiss her.
Her lips had been so soft.
It had been an amazing feeling, incomparable to anything he had experienced in his entire life.
Before he had known what was going on, she had pushed him back.
"Why did you do this?"
The confused look on her face, the pain in her voice.
Yes, why did he do this?
They were still standing in front of each other. She was waiting for an answer, and inside of his head, the thoughts were spinning around, but no words left his lips. He just couldn't speak!
Instead, he just stared at her.
Then, when she turned away from him, this movement somehow brought him back into action.
"Molly, I…" He had no idea what he wanted to say.
"Don't!" She interrupted him, holding up her hand.
"I am sorry."
That was definitely not what he wanted to say, and obviously not, what she wanted to hear, telling by the look she shot him, quickly walking towards the door of the lab.
"No, wait!"
She stopped, still facing the door.
"I didn't mean it. I mean… no! I meant it, but I didn't mean to hurt you. It was just…I… I am sorry. No, not for the kiss…" Ok, he thought, I really have to stop this stupid stammering. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath, controlling his thoughts again. Or at least trying to.
Molly looked at him over her shoulder.
"You don't need to do this, you know. It's okay. I just need some fresh air."
"That is a lie." He stated the obvious. Her voice was shaking, there were tears in her eyes. She clearly was deeply moved inside from what had just happened.
He took another deep breath before he spoke again.
"Molly, I did not want to hurt your feelings. I actually never wanted to, even though I know I did it way too often. I have no idea what happened, but it felt just right to do it. Please, forgive me."
Well, that wasn't too bad, he thought. That hopefully gave him some time to think about this strange feeling inside of him. And why his heart was beating so fast…
Molly turned around to face him, but did not move closer.
"Sherlock, I know that you did not intend to hurt me, in fact, that you never have. But because you don't know anything about people's feelings – well, about MY feelings -, it does not mean I can easily excuse this kiss."
She inhaled deeply.
Now or never, she thought.
"You might not have noticed it, but I liked you from the start. Actually, more than liked you."
A memory of this awful Christmas party flashed through his mind. He knew that she had dressed up only for him, not for a new boyfriend, as he had supposed she had had.
"I…" He still had no idea what he should say. And he hated this. He angrily shook his head.
"I know you do. And I guess, I like you, too. I am just not good at this. Please, forgive me."
She looked at him.
"Sherlock, are you going to tell me that you kissed me because you like me the same way I like you? And you know what I mean with LIKE!"
It took him a moment to think about this. There was still this warm feeling inside of him. The urge to have her back as close to him as she had been, just a minute ago. The memory of her soft lips on his, and how it made his heart race.
She mistook his silence, rolled her eyes and turned back towards the door.
This movement finally brought him back to reality. With two big steps forward, he was behind her, pressing the door shut with his hands left and right of her arms. She took a short breath, clearly shocked; he could see her how her eyes widened, and feel the heat of her body close to his own. It did not make it easier for him to control his thoughts.
"Don't go," he whispered into her ear. His warm breath touched her neck and made her shiver.
The only sound in the room was their heavy breathing.
Carefully, Molly turned around to face him.
Sherlock swallowed hard. His brain felled numb and a thousand thoughts were still rushing through his head.
So, this is how it feels, then, this is why people consider emotions important. THOSEemotions…
Molly looked him in the eyes. He had no idea what she might see there right now, but hoped that it might somehow express the chaos inside of him. At least, it made the expression on her face change.
Slowly, she raised her hand to touch his cheek. He lowered his head to bring his face closer to hers. Their eyes flipped back and forth between each other's lips and eyes. Sherlock decided to let go of his thoughts, closed his eyes and let his feelings take control of the situation.
When their lips touched for a second time in just a few minutes, it felt like a flash. Instinctively, he pulled her closer to his body, and was rewarded with a light sigh and the grip of her hands around his neck and in his hair.
She parted her lips to let his tongue enter her mouth, inviting him to play with hers.
He had no idea how long this kiss had lasted when they pulled away from each other, breathing heavily, but eyes still locked into each other's.
Sherlock had a brief smile on his face which made Molly blush and return the smile. She looked a bit embarrassed, also confused, and happy. He was fascinated by the range of emotions floating over her face. She was like an open book to him right now, but his own feelings somehow seemed to prevent him from analysing what exactly he saw.
He wondered if she might see the same on his face…
"You…do you…is this real?", she stammered.
The only thing he could do was to nod his head, still not trusting his voice or his ability to form grammatically correct and logic sentences.
He cleared his throat and waited another second before he spoke again.
"I really wanted to do this, you know, and it felt so right, in fact, it still does. I enjoyed it. But I have to warn you, again: I am not good with those emotional things."
She smiled. "You might be better than you think," she said, before pulling his head down for another kiss.
And right now she did not care whether he might hurt her again, or where this all might lead them.
And somehow this serenity seemed to spread to him, and he did not care about logical thoughts or weaknesses anymore. The only thing he knew was that it felt good to have the small pathologist so close to his body. His pathologist…
-END-