Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 59th cycle. Now cycle 60!
"Here Comes the Day"
Jake/Marley
A/N: This story and all stories for two weeks (days 1240-1253) are dedicated to
a very dear and awesome friend on the occasion of her birthday ;) Here's to you, Anne!
Only months ago, he wouldn't have realized he could have someone this special to him in his life. That was just how he used to be. Maybe it was just that he hadn't met the right girl, but he knew better.
He didn't use to care. He would hook up with one girl, and he would be charming, and everything would seem wonderful. But then he would start to wander away the moment a new prospect came along.
He'd started feeling something for Marley the moment he saw her. He couldn't explain it yet, there was just… something. He had come to be set in his ways though, and this had nearly cost him his shot with her when he'd ended up getting pulled in by Kitty's claws. Maybe it was all for the best, because it had given him time to sort some things out in his head.
In the end he had understood that he did like Marley, liked her a lot, in ways he'd never liked any other girl before. He didn't know what to do with something like that, and he was about seventy-five percent sure he would screw it up, some days closer to eighty or ninety. He didn't think he deserved someone like her, as much as he'd play the confidence game. He was exactly who he'd been, he couldn't pretend he wasn't, not with all his past 'victims' sitting and walking around them all over school. But he couldn't ignore the effect she had on him, so he had pursued her.
He was better with her, still himself but better, like he had thrown off the rust to uncover the person underneath. He still had to figure out to work in being that other version of himself, and there were hits and misses along the way. What he didn't doubt was that she had been the thing that made him start turning around.
And then she had told him those words that felt like a gauntlet punch to the gut. She had kissed Ryder, or he had kissed her and she'd kissed back, which felt like the same.
He didn't know how to process it, had to get out of there before he said or did anything stupid. Part of him was thinking he shouldn't have been surprised, not because it was Marley, but because it was him. He had to have earned this, after all the girls he had screwed over before. It was like karmic payback or something, and he'd had no idea it would feel this bad.
He was committed to her. It was new, but it meant a lot to him that he was. He wanted to be angry with her, with both of them, and he knew he would make that very apparent to them, but inside everything else was just… He was hurt, betrayed, and trying not to think he had it coming.
He would start to replay the whole thing in his head. They had been tiptoeing around… something, whatever it was… and then he had gone to Kitty instead. This had led her to Ryder, and it looked like they might have been on the verge of becoming something together. But then out of the blue she had come and asked him out. Later he had figured out she had asked Ryder to do something with her but he'd been busy. So was this the only reason she had ended up with him? Would she be Ryder's girl now if he had said yes?
He was probably overthinking it, but then how was he supposed to go around without showing he couldn't be thrown, that he was still standing tall? All he could think about was whether or not he had ever really had Marley, if he'd ever deserved to be near her.
The one thing he had as an absolute truth was the way he felt about her, and the way she made him feel.
He would hear people saying 'I love you,' in movies and on television, and he guessed he got it. Looking at Marley and understanding that what he felt for her was actual love, it had turned everything around. He was still clumsy about it, and he made his mistakes, but the intent behind it was honest. Knowing that Marley felt that for him, too, it had been one of the best moments in his life. So what was he supposed to do with this other moment, the one that slipped a shade of doubt on to every look, every word, every kiss…
When he was with her, he felt… The only way he knew to explain it was remembering when he was a kid, and there had been a really big rain storm, or snow storm, and he'd been stuck inside for days. But then the storm would break, and he would get to run out the door to play again. He'd be so happy he could barely keep his feet on the ground. That feeling, that was how he felt when he was with her, clear skies and sunlight.
Then one day, they had talked, just talked. It was new to him, and maybe he hadn't thought it possible until then that they could turn things around. There might have been a day when he would have just frozen her out, fool me once, fool me twice, that sort of thing. But this was Marley. This was his day after the storm. And after they spoke, he was able to clear the doubt back, to know for certain that what he saw, and heard, and felt, was no lie.
They'd had a rough patch. But they were still here, both of them together. Maybe they would be stronger for it. He hoped so. He couldn't imagine his life without her in it to light the way.
THE END
A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.
In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are
always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!