1 - Wedding bells and a broken man.

Flashback 5 years ago

Ana ran down the steps and into the nave of the church as fast as she could, tears running down her face, holding up her gown with her heals in her hands. A few guests still remained, namely their family, who looked at her in anger and sadness. She walked straight over to his brother.

"Where is he Elliot?" she choked, her eyes moving around the church looking for the love of her life.

"He's gone, he left," he was pissed, she knew he was. Who could blame him after what she just did? she hated herself. She hated herself so much.

"Please Elliot, you've got to tell me where, I made a mistake, a huge mistake,"

"Jibbing my brother at the alter isn't a mistake Ana, it's a choice, you've broken him, he's destroyed," Ana's tears were coming hard and fast. Her chest ached more and more by the second. She had to find him.

"Please let me talk to him,"

"Look, even if I wanted to tell you I couldn't, he left as soon as my mom told him," Ana burst into tears, loud, uncontrollable tears. She'd just lost everything, the only man she would ever love.

She looked everywhere for him; ran around in her wedding dress knowing that he couldn't have gone too far. His car was still in the car park of the church. After nearly 20 minutes of looking for him in a panic whilst tears blinded her vision, she saw him. He was sitting on the river bank at the back of the church, nursing a scotched with his little sister comforting him. His jacket was thrown on a rock next to him as he stared across the river. She ran across the grass towards them, lifting her wedding dress up so it wouldn't catch in the mud.

"Christian!" she called as she got closer. He didn't turn around; but Mia did.

"Leave him alone Ana, go back home," she spat angrily. Ana had never seen Mia like this. Mia had always loved Ana; they'd been best friends along with Kate since the first time they met.

"Mia please, I'm begging you, just let me talk to him," Ana's throat was hoarse from crying and her eyes burned from the constant flow of tears.

"You don't get to talk to him, you could have talked to him last night before you pulled this stunt! leave him alone,"

"Mia, thank you, but you can go back to mom now, I can protect myself," Christian whispered. His voice was like a dagger through her heart; so full of hurt and hopelessness. Mia struggled, looking between the two of them before finally giving in. She kissed Christian's cheek.

"Don't leave here without saying goodbye to me," Mia demanded knowing her brother was seconds from bolting from the church before she'd caught up with him after the announcement that Ana didn't want to marry him.

They were alone and every word Ana wanted to say to him went out of her head. She just wanted to hold him; love him, be loved by him, but he couldn't even look at her.

"I love you," she whispered. Her chest ached as she thought of how it may be the last time she got to say those words to him. Would she ever hear those words out of his lips again? "I'm so sorry Christian.. I..I..I panicked. I want to marry you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You're the only man I've ever loved, my first and only... everything, and I got some pre wedding jitters," Ana breathed, sitting on the grass beside him. He was so beautiful, so strong yet vulnerable right now. How did she ever get this gorgeous man in the first place? she'd blown it. She'd blown her chance at happiness. No one else would ever fill his place, his name was tattooed across her body.. ;Literally she thought as she remembered getting a tattoo of his initials on her hip bone for his 19th birthday present. He'd loved it; he showed her all night long just how much he loved it.

He hadn't said a word, he just downed his scotch.

"Come back inside the church with me baby, we can get married and live happily ever after," her lip quivered as she said the words.

"Do you even know what it was like?" Christian's voice was void of all emotion. He just continued to stare across the riverbank. "I was so happy, so excited to marry you. I barely slept last night wishing the day would come faster. Do you how it felt to be told that the girl you loved with every bone in your body. The girl who you'd wanted to marry since you were 5 years old doesn't want to marry you? you broke my heart. And I can't let you do it again," he took a long gulp of scotch letting it burn in his throat as his fiancé kneeled beside him, her face flooded with tears.

"I never thought you'd do that to me," Christian breathed, "the thought never even popped into my head. I thought you loved me too much to do that. I thought you wanted us as much as I did. But now, I'm doubting everything. I'm doubting if you ever really loved me, maybe you were just laughing at me all this time. You were my best friend Ana, I'd have given you the world." His voice cracked on the last word and she threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and burrowing her face into his shoulder, hysterical and pleading.

"I love you Christian, I've always loved you and I always will. You're everything, you mean the world to me. You have to believe me. I'm not me without you. I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. Please... p...p..please, come with me now. Marry me? Please Christian, Marry me?" she begged.

"You don't want to marry me Ana. You really don't and I can't be your regret. I think I'll fear marriage for the rest of my life after what's just happened." Ana continued to sob, clutching onto him so tightly knowing in her heart that this would be the last time she got to touch him like this. Would their last kiss they shared last night before she'd left for Kate's really be their last kiss? would the last time they made love, yesterday morning, in their bed, really be the last time she felt that pleasure? the thought made her bawl harder. Christian sighed, too weak to pull her body from his.

"You know," he said softly, his voice vulnerable and his eyes swimming with silent tears,"the first time I saw you, our parent were taking us to church one Sunday morning. You hadn't noticed me and you were carrying this pink rabbit with half an ear and it's foot had been sewn on backwards," Christian laughed at the memory despite the crushing pain in his chest. "I turned to my mom that day, and I told her "That's the girl I'm going to marry." You were my dream come true Ana, and now, the memory of me standing in that church and being told by my mom that you aren't coming and that you don't want to be my wife, that you don't want a future with me, will haunt me forever,"

"I do want a future with you. I want everything with you, forever." Ana whispered, holding him tighter. Christian shook his head. His heart was broken. She'd taken it from him when they were 5 years old and ripped it apart in front of his eyes today. She loved him; she loved him so much. But he didn't believe her.

"Its too late Ana," Christian whispered. He turned to face her and the tears in his eyes made hers fall faster. "I hope one day you meet a man that you actually want to marry, I hope you have the best life, a happy one. I hope you have kids and laugh every single day. And I hope that one day, years from now, the two of us can meet again and tell our stories, because despite what I'm feeling right now, I still love you with all my heart Ana, and I want you to be happy, even if its far away from me," Christian gave her a watery smile. She was crying so hard that she couldn't even open her eyes. Her throat was stuck, her hands were shaking as they wrapped around the love of her life, praying for him to never leave her arms; She'd give anything to start the morning again, to walk up the isle and meet this man and walk off into the sunset with him. But now, she'd lost him and she felt numb. How could she ever be happy again without this man at her side? he was all that she wanted and she'd broken his heart.

"I'm going to go now," he breathed. She wrapped every limb around his body, anchoring herself to him and begging him to stay, to forgive her and come back into the church with her but she knew he wouldn't. She'd ruined everything and she had no one to blame but herself.

"Don't go Christian, please don't go,"

"Let go Ana," she bawled harder, sobbing into his shoulder leaving splatters of makeup all over his pristine shirt.

"W.. w.. where are y..y..you going?" she sobbed.

"Anywhere that's not here," he sighed. He stood up and removed her arms from around him. She tried to hold on but it was no use... she couldn't stop him from walking away. She collapsed to the ground and fell into darkness. A life without Christian was a life without living. What had she done?

A/N - So, I was planning on writing a kinky, darker story when this little idea popped into my head. I wish there was a T/M rating on FF too because I don't know which category this will fall into, but I'll stay safe with M. Also, It will have a happy ending for anyone wondering. Hope you enjoyed the first chapter, please let me know your thoughts :)