A/N: I am in the middle of writing "Donna Meets Lily" and another unpublished work, but here is my take on the un-Darvey like start of Season 7. I hope it doesn't get to this point, but if it works out the way we all want to this agonizing will have been for good. Please read and R/R. Thank you - carebearmax

Really, Harvey?

Harvey knocked on Donna's office door. Sometimes after all these weeks it was still surprising to see her name on an office door instead of ten feet away from him in her cubicle doing all those legal duties for on which he had depended on her. He knew Donna deserved her title. She did run the firm. That was for sure.

"Hey, come to brag about the coup you just scored," Donna asked as she saw Harvey walk slowly through the door. She knew by the way he carried himself trodding trepidatiously into her office with that "sort of bad news" expression on his face that there was something difficult he wanted to discuss with her. Usually he would wait until she went home and then she would receive a knock on her door and there he would be standing at her door with that "I need you" expression written in his eyes and face.

"Uh-oh, I can tell by the look on your face that you aren't here to brag about anything. What's going on, Harvey?" Donna asked.

He took a seat in one of the chairs in front of her desk.

"Well, I want to tell you something and I'm not sure how you're going to react."

"That's a switch. I'm usually feeding you that line." Donna said.

Harvey leaned forward and said, " You know some weeks ago when you left me as my secretary you wondered if I would run to Dr. Agard for panic attacks. Well, I have seen Dr. Agard but that's not why. We've been seeing each other."

"You mean you've been sleeping with her. Don't sugar coat it, Harvey. I know you better than you know yourself. So what's the problem?"

Harvey got up and went over to Donna's small bar in her office. He grabbed the bottle of Macallan 18 which he knew she only kept for his late night office visits and poured them both a drink. He came back and handed her one tumbler and he took the other. After they both took a sip, Harvey sat back down on the chair.

"I think she may be the one."

Donna's heart plunged into her stomach. Those were the words she never thought would venture out of Harvey Specter's mouth unless they were in reference to herself. She asked him a few years ago when he told her he loved her how he loved her to which he could not say. Donna knew then he would not tell her even if he had looked at her that way because he did not want to lose her friendship, guidance, and secretarial skills.

"Do you mean marriage?" Donna asked. Her eyebrows crept considerably up her forehead. "You?"

"Yeah, me. What's wrong with that? I just never thought I would find the right woman. Now, I think I have."

"Ok, so why are you here?"

"To let you down easy."

Donna laughed and almost choked on her drink.

"Let me down easy? We were never a "couple couple", Harvey. You never needed to let me down easy on anything else. What about Scottie and Zoe? I wanted you to be happy and maybe down deep I thought we could be happy together. But hey, if Paula Agard is it, I'm glad for you." Donna toasted him and then swiftly gulped the rest of the contents of the glass, head pushed back violently in doing so and then placed her empty glass on her desk firmly.

"Donna...I do love you. Just not that way. It has taken me years to know that I love you as a friend. You are always straight enough to tell me my weaknesses and faults to my face. You always have my back and you still do."

"Harvey, really, it's ok. I'm happy for you. We can still be professional colleagues and friends. I'm sure your family will like her very much."

"To tell you the truth, I told my mom you were the one that convinced me I should make up with my family."

"So? It doesn't matter now. You want to marry Dr. Agard and that's whom you should take home to meet your family."

Before Harvey took another drink, he asked, "Are you sure you're ok with this?"

"I'm fine," Donna said standing up and coming around her desk.

"May I give the groom-to-be a hug?" Donna said in her own trepidatious way. Luckily in the dim lamp light, Harvey could not see the tears standing in Donna's dark green eyes. She wanted to hug him, mainly, because it would be one of the first and last times she would get to hold him. They had held hands not long ago. Donna also had told him not long ago that she had wanted more. When she was given this new position, she had mistakenly thought that her new position at the firm was the "more" she was needing. She had not consciously thought that she wanted Harvey included in that "more"as well. They still worked together in a way, but she would have gladly dropped her rule if he had met her half way.

Harvey said "Sure."

He opened his arms and enveloped this very special woman in his arms and held her there. For just a moment he doubted himself with Paula suddenly realizing that maybe Donna should be his. She really was the one who knew him better than he knew himself. She had saved his ass so many times and not just professionally. She had helped him personally with his relationships including the one with his mother. She had always steered him in the right direction. His moral compass.

Harvey then just shook those doubtful thoughts out of his head and held Donna a little longer.

The next day Harvey decided he should buy a ring before he asked the woman to marry him. It was strange how fast this feeling of needing permanence had popped into his head. Since reconciling with his mother and family, he realized that he did want wife, children, and a home. He had dreampt about Donna many times especially in the recent past. Paula had associated Donna with his mother. Harvey did not quite understand that extrapolation, but then again he was not as well versed in psychology as his intended.

The second time he dreampt of Donna, again, it was an abandonment issue. This time it was Jessica. Jessica had been his mentor and older sister to some extent. Donna had been there with both items. It did disturb Harvey that he had dreampt of Donna in sex dreams and not the woman with whom he just started sleeping. Harvey shook it out of his head and chalked it up that he needed some companionship with benefits and thought Paula had been that connection.

He proceeded to Jeweler's Row to buy Paula an engagement ring.

Meanwhile the new COO of Pearson Specter Litt decided to take a sick day. Harvey's news took the wind out of her sails. Donna thought she was over her love for Harvey Specter. Again over the last two years after he told her he loved her, but not how, he had reopened the heartache that she had dampened down for the last fourteen years. Withstanding all that tantalizing push and pull of their relationship, she had still remained his faithful assistant and friend. Donna tried breaking away from Harvey by working for Louis, but to tell you the truth she was glad when Louis agreed to let her return to Harvey. She could be Louis' friend, but she needed Harvey to need her. Besides old habits die hard and both men she had to handle with kid gloves in their own way. She did somehow in the back of her mind think erroneously that when Harvey was ready for a "real" relationship he would look for Donna. Wrong, again, Paulsen!

Last night she came home and drank her whole bottle of Chardonnay and was glad that it had worked better than any book or stupid television show to help her slip into a dreamless sleep.

Now the heartache along with a headache and depression unseen in herself previously caused her to call Rachel and have her pass on the message that the COO was taking a day off. Rachel asked if there was anything she could do, but Donna said no. The last person she wanted to see was Rachel. Her best friend was still in stages of planning her wedding to Mike Ross and was happily in love. Right now the empathetic friend side of Donna was gutted and did not feel like coming out and placing nice with others right now.