Photography deals exquisitely with appearances, but nothing is what it appears to be. ~Duane Michals
All he heard as he lay in his bed was the sound of his own breathing. Maybe there was a very muffled sound of background traffic but he barely noticed. Danny only heard silence where he could have been listening to the sound of another living, breathing body warming the now empty side of his bed. And he knew it was own fault. It could be different. It could have been different. But his choices lately had not been the best. Right maybe but not for the best. Sometimes he hated being a responsible adult, doing what was expected by others instead of what he really and truly wanted.
So here he was, alone again. The future he had barely allowed himself to imagine slipping out of his hands. Out of his life.
~o0o0o0o~
Danny was in his basement darkroom when the rarely used backdoor doorbell rang. He knew who it was waiting in the tiny courtyard behind the brownstone, as only one person ever arrived at that door unannounced. After taking the developed picture out of the solution and hanging it to dry, he made his over to the door. Sure, it was an old fashioned method for developing pictures in this age of instant digital but he preferred the depth and richness of film photography.
He wasn't surprised to have his suspensions confirmed and find Jayne on the other side of the door. Her sensible grey overcoat was pulled tight, a warm scarf wound around her throat, the snow settling easily on her grey hair.
Danny knew Jayne had an actual last name but he'd never tried to learn what it was. There were certain things that were never discussed by those who worked for I.N.C. and the last names of senior leadership was one of those things.
"So are you planning to let me in or what?" Jayne asked with laughter lighting her grey eyes.
"You still haven't learned about calling ahead?" Danny asked before backing up to allow Jayne to enter the basement.
"That's so… provincial," Jayne said with a wave of her hand.
"I suppose so," Danny laughed, leading her upstairs into the kitchen. The rug laid over the hardwood floor absorbed the snow melting off Jayne's boots. Danny accepted her heavy coat to hang on the outside of the closet until it shed some of the moisture.
She smiled at the sound of small feet running toward them, squatting in time to accept Grace into her arms. "Gracie."
"Aunt Jayne," Grace squealed. "Danno didn't say you was coming!"
"He didn't know, baby," Jayne told her honestly, holding tight to the little girl as she stood. "I decided to surprise my favorite niece."
"I not weally yours," she giggled.
"When has that mattered?" she asked with a warm smile.
"Never," Grace agreed. She looked over Jayne's shoulder at her Uncle Matt who was smiling at them all. "Look. Jayne came to see me!"
"Good to see you again," Matt said although his expression was more wary than happy about Jayne's presence. Her arrival almost always preceded Danny's disappearance.
"You too," Jayne said before returning to listen to what Grace was telling her about pre-school and what her friend Gary had said as though Jayne knew exactly who Gary was and was equally interested in his four-year old wisdom.
"Gracie," Danny finally said, stopping her story with a kiss. "Maybe Aunt Jayne doesn't need to know every single thing that has happened at pre-school since you last saw her."
"You do," Grace informed Jayne cheerfully, her brown eyes wide and happy.
"Of course," Jayne said, kissing her head. "And I will listen to all of it. Right after I talk to your Danno."
"Are you makin' Danno go?" Grace asked with a frown.
"For a little while," Jayne admitted, putting her gently on the floor. "He'll be back before you have time to miss him."
"I miss him when he's not here," Grace told her, looking as full of disapproval as any four-year old possibly could.
"I know, Gracie," Jayne said.
"But it's my job," Danny reminded her, squatting next to her. "Go with Matty while I talk to Jayne. Then you can have Jayne all to yourself."
"Pwo-mise?"
"I promise, Monkey," Danny told her. "We won't be long."
"Okay," Grace agreed reluctantly, taking Matt's hand to return to the living room where they could hear one of her Disney movies playing. She looked over her shoulder until they rounded the corner and disappeared.
"What?" Danny asked Jayne as they settled on the tall bar stools at the breakfast bar.
"What - what?" Jayne said.
"What do you need me to do? Where do you need me to go? As much as you love Grace, you did not come all the way to New York in a near-blizzard to talk with her. You are about to send me off some place. I see the signs written all over you," Danny said in reluctant acceptance.
"I know you want I.N.C. to back off. I respect that," Jayne said in a preemptive need to sooth Danny's ruffled feathers.
"You promised, Jayne," Danny said, his bright blue eyes squinting at her, the laugh lines more prominent. "I know I still owe you my soul and probably always will. But we agreed all that changed irrevocably the day Rachel died."
"It did," Jayne agreed. "But we need you to go to Hawaii. Cover shoot is all arranged."
"Swimsuits again? Always with the sexy nubile swimsuit models," Danny complained mildly, wrapping sturdy hands around his mug. "You want some tea?"
"Yes, please. And shooting swimsuits is tough work, I'll grant you that," Jayne said as Danny put on the kettle.
"What's going on in Hawaii that I need to handle? Hawaii. You know it's one of my least favorite places, right?" Danny asked, sounding tired to his own ears.
"Are you going? I cannot give you any details unless you agree."
"I am going. Because every time I accept an assignment, I convince myself I'm that much closer to being out of your debt and that the next mission will be the last. And I.N.C. will finally leave me alone."
"You know I do everything I can to protect you," Jayne said. "I tried to get them to assign other agents but you have the most convincing cover."
"I appreciate it," Danny said. "How long?"
"Hopefully a week. Maybe 10 days. I booked you a first class ticket."
"That will help a little," Danny said, not looking forward to the nearly endlessly flight to Hawaii. "What is the assignment?"
"There are Navy SEALs being murdered. Systematically and brutally."
"The Navy never wanted help before," Danny said, confusion furrowing his brows. "Why did they contact you?"
"The Navy higher-ups think it's one of their own," Jayne said. "They can't figure out how anyone else could take them out. Especially since it's someone who knows their schedules, their patterns. Doesn't matter how they vary their habits. Killer still finds them in order to take them out."
"SEALs huh?"
"No one will suspect you are investigating the murders. That's one of the things that makes you perfect for this assignment."
"There must have been someone else you could send to that God forsaken, pineapple infested hellhole," Danny said conversationally.
"Don't hold back. Tell me how you really feel about Hawaii."
"Don't deflect," Danny retorted, making Jayne laugh.
"Take this job and I'll guarantee six months of no missions."
"Fine," Danny conceded with a long-suffering sigh. "You have to tell Grace."
"Done," Jayne said. "Can you leave tomorrow?"
"Yeah. I need to make a couple of phone calls then I'll be ready."
Jayne nodded, standing up with her cup of barely touched tea. "Make your calls. I'll tell Grace and Matthew. Then I'll order pizza."
"No ham and pineapple," Danny called after her as she went down the hallway to the living room. Jayne's laughter returned to him as Danny pulled out his cell phone.
Once all of his calls were finished, he joined his brother, daughter, and boss in the living room. Grace was listening to Jayne tell her a story about one of Danny's first missions, censored to be appropriate for little ears.
"Danno," Grace said, looking up at him from Jayne lap. "Aunt Jayne says you're goin' to Hawaii. Can't I go?"
"What did Jayne say?" Danny asked her with a smile.
"You're workin'. But I wanna go," Grace protested.
"I know, baby. But you have to stay here with Matty."
She pouted but let it go more easily than usual. Danny thought Jayne's presence was one of the reasons for her lack of theatrics. Jayne had that effect on everyone, Danny had noticed.
"Someone said something about pizza," Matt said, smiling at Jayne.
"My treat," Jayne confirmed. "You order. I'll pay."
"Done," Matt agreed, dialing their favorite delivery place and ordering two large pies.
"Aunt Jayne is sleepin' over," Grace announced as Matt was placing the order.
"Yay," Danny mock-cheered, making the others laugh.
"She's makin' me pancakes for breakfas'," Grace added, Jayne nodding seriously.
"Good. I can sleep in," Matt said.
"Yeah, I feel for you," Danny said as he settled in the armchair next to the couch. "You have no end of troubles."
"Especially working for you," Matt responded, shaking his head. "'Go to the grocery store. Balance my checkbook. Deal with the publishers.' It never ends."
"Task-master. That's me," Danny agreed before half-listening to Grace telling Jayne what movie they would be watching next. He suspected she was suggesting Lilo and Stitch, her default movie whenever Danny was being sent to Hawaii which was far too often for his comfort. All that sunshine. All that bare skin. Ocean and sand everywhere. Give him civilization any day.
~0~
"You'll be home soon, wight, Danno?" Grace said the next morning as she played with her pancakes more than ate them. She was trying to be as brave as any four-year old could but in truth she missed her father whenever he was sent away. She sort of understood that it was his job to leave but some part of her was afraid he wouldn't come back. Danny thought she didn't really remember Rachel as she had died before Grace's second birthday but Grace did know that most of her friends had a mom and dad and that her mother had gone away. Dying didn't have a lot of meaning to her – she only knew her mom had left her and her father alone.
"I will, baby. You have my promise," Danny said as he kissed her hair. "I'll call you every chance I get."
"On the 'puter?"
"Of course. You'll be able to see me and talk to me," Danny promised.
Grace nodded and concentrated on her pancakes as bravely as she could.
"Would you like me to stay until tomorrow?" Jayne offered. "I know I'm not your Danno but we could go to the Ice Capades."
"Weally?" she said, perking up.
"Sure," Jayne agreed. "You don't have to come," she said to Matt with a laugh.
"Thank you," Matt mouthed over Grace's head.
"I think Disney On Ice is at Madison Square Garden," Danny said.
"Perfect," Jayne said with a nod.
"Yay," Grace cheered, chattering happily about the princesses that would be skating and how she and Jayne could go skating after the show. Jayne agreed to everything Grace suggested, knowing from experience she would wear herself out before they finished half of it.
"Your plane leaves in a couple hours," Jayne reminded Danny.
"Right," Danny agreed, standing up reluctantly. He went upstairs to get his suitcase. It wasn't long before he was back down in the kitchen, pausing only long enough to hug and kiss Grace, promising to call her as soon as he landed.
"Huwwy home," Grace said as she watched him leave their house.
"I will. Danno loves you," he said before slipping out the front door. He took a deep breath as he got into his car to drive to the airport. He should just quit I.N.C. – which truthfully he wasn't sure was even possible. He didn't know anyone who had actually left so maybe the rumors were true – commitment to I.N.C. was for life. He didn't remember reading that in the papers he'd signed when they recruited him right out of high school. He had attracted their attention by winning the state competition in biathlon. That was back when he still harbored dreams of making it to the Olympics in the sport. But as good as his shooting was, his skiing was not. He didn't embarrass himself but his shorter-than-average stature put him at a disadvantage. He had to work twice as hard to make it from target to target and his times were never quite good enough. His shooting, though, was practically flawless.
I.N.C. approached him and asked if he was really interested in giving up photography to be a policeman. Danny was torn by his love of the art and his need to make the world a safer place. When I.N.C. offered to pay for his college and provide him full training to join while pursuing his passion for photography, he was sold. And for the first twelve years, he never had cause to regret his decision. Then Grace had been born and every assignment meant leaving her behind. Rachel had known about both his lives before they had married, although she didn't have any specific details about his work with I.N.C. Danny knew she suspected that he did more than investigate crimes, but she never asked and he never volunteered the information. His I.N.C. salary kept them comfortable and she was happy staying home with the baby. And the lapse between missions provided him ample time to pursue his passion for photography. He had the awards to prove that others thought he was also talented.
Everything changed during an unexpected snowstorm. Rachel was trying to get home before she was stranded in New Jersey and was killed by a huge SUV traveling faster than was safe under optimal conditions. Danny had considered killing the driver who walked away with barely a scratch but Jayne had reminded him that those skills were not appropriate in his regular life. Grace had already lost her mother. She couldn't lose her father to prison on top of it.
That was when Matthew moved in with Danny and Grace. His reassuring presence didn't replace Rachel but it made their lives a little easier. Matt had invented a new method for trading stocks on the internet and had been living comfortably on the rewards of his hard work. He was happy to work on his other innovations while helping Danny with Grace. They had formed their own family, untraditional but secure and content.
Matthew knew as much about Danny's secret life as Rachel had but was even less interested. Whatever it was Danny did when he disappeared wasn't Matthew's business and he never pressed for details.
Danny managed to navigate the airport fairly easily, the crowds thinner than usual. Once he boarded and settled in first class, he took out the briefing folder, reviewing the details Jayne had given him.
Confidential. Code Blue.
Subject: Death of Navy SEALS
Locale: Hawaii, primarily Oahu
Facts Known: As of this date, five Navy SEALS have been found dead. Each Cause of Death was unique, no pattern emerging. Victims were not of the same team, no apparent connection outside their SEAL training.
Four of the victims were stationed in Hawaii. The second victim was in Hawaii on a training mission. His mission was considered need-to-know. There were only four members of the Navy who knew of his assignment to the operation on the islands. They have been interviewed. Alibis are confirmed. They are not considered suspects.
Working theory, set forth by M.P.s, is that the killer is a SEAL.
Your contact on the island will be Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett, USN reserves, SEAL Team 6. Annapolis graduate. Formerly with Naval Intelligence; he has been fully briefed.
Commander McGarrett will be posing as bodyguard/photographer's assistant.
The rest of the briefing consisted of the biographies of the murdered SEALs, all the evidence that had been collected, and the arrangements for the photo shoots that would serve as Danny's cover.