My best friend and I wrote this at four in the morning on a fateful night, so don't blame us. Quick history; Sauron was not completely destroyed, and now free-floats around the world. Another unknown enemy are taking over the human cities and there has formed a rebellion of the good guys led by Aragorn since we had no other use for him. And if it helps you understand anything here, Bombadil killed Xelma's favorite cousin. She has sworn to make things even before she's through.

This story starts right after the ring was destroyed in Mount Doom, and the people of Middle-Earth found out that Sauron still lived. The Fellowship, contrary to popular belief, never broke up, and a Rebellion formed, lead by the infamous Strider.

"Thank Gandalf! I finally passed the final test of Elf School!" Xelma exclaimed. "After the third try." Tarisa walked up behind her and patted her on the shoulder. "I was with you the whole way! Good job!"

Xelma sighed happily. "And Gandalf said I couldn't pass!"

Tarisa raised an eyebrow. "He says that a lot, doesn't he?"

"So, what should we do now?"

"Well, we exceeded Gandalf expectations! We can do anything!"

"Let's join the Rebellion!" Xelma joked. "Wait, that's actually a good idea! They need all the help they can get!"

Time Lapse

"Yay! We've been enlisted!"

Then, Legolas walked by and noticed Xelma and company. "Hey, you finally past!" He chuckled. "I aced that test. What were your test scores the first time, again? Oh wait, you failed. I remember..."

Cue corny flashback-

Back in the Elf School in Mirkwood, little Xelma and various other Elves were sitting at their school desks. The teacher was pacing around, holding up a variety of arrows.

"Children, to be a ful-fledged Elf, you must be able to distinguish other arrows from each other. You, there..." he walked up to Xelma, holding up an arrow. "What kind of arrow is this?"

Xelma stood still for a few seconds, then randomly flailed her arms above her head. "Orange!"

The teacher looked at her, ashamed. The Elf beside her, who just happened to be Legolas, snickered. She kicked his shin, and he muttered a swear word.

"Why, princeling! Watch your language!"

The teacher held out another arrow. "Errr... let's try that again. What is this one?"

"Shiny!"

"Okay, you failed. Go off and learn how to be a Dwarf or something."

Back to present-

Xelma kicked his shins again, and he muttered the same swear word. Or should I say mutter? There were no teachers around this time.

But instead Gimli walked up, and said, "Elf, you learn from the best."

Then Frodo Buggins walked out from the leader's tent, after talking to Strider Maggot, known as so after a startling experience where they were exiting a small, dark cave, and Pippin shouted, "Oh no! I'm a crybaby! And I also stole mushrooms!" and who had seemingly been Strider, had ripped off a clever disguise and turned out to be the farmer! "Ah-hah! So it was you!" and started running after him.

They weren't seen for several weeks, but then Gimli brought up, "So, where's the real Strider?"

"Here I am!"

"So, what is your real name?"

"Aragorn."

"Ah-hah! So maggot wasn't making up a name, he was using the name of his brother!"

"Yes! I am Aragorn Maggot!"

Anyway, Frodo had his shades on, because he made anyone faint or even die (if they're weaklings) when he widened his eyes the slightest bit. Then Sam ran up and all the other Elves were watching, and he asked his master, "Oh, Mr. Frodo, what do you think of my painting?"

Frodo answered, "Oh, sorry Sam, I can't see too well... One sec..." and Frodo lifted his shades briefly, and everyone save Xelma (because she was completely intrigued by a passing hawk overhead, which she had never seen before in Mirkwood) dropped unconcious. The Elves because they weren't complete weaklings and Sam since he was so used to it, and none of them died. Luckily. Maybe. Xelma looked back curiously at all the horrible screams just as Frodo slipped his sunglasses back on, embarrassed.

Xelma watched them until they woke back up. Then suddenly a short little man burst out of the bushes with a knife in his hand, singing twisted children's songs. Head leaned to the side, he gazed hungrily at Xelma, drooling slightly, shouting, "Where's Tommy?"

Several people screamed. The rest drew their weapons. Gimli complained about being too short. Bombadil was well known in these parts, after all. Xelma was about to run up to him with her knife, but a couple arrows whizzed over her head and were embedded in the tree trunk behind Bombadil. He cursed, spitting all over the grass in front of him by accident, and dashed with his little bow legged style of walking into the forest, tripping over his yellow boots.

Xelma blurted out several words in Elven I dare not repeat which made Tarisa cringe and thank Gandalf Sam didn't understand Elven. She wheeled around, looking for the firerers of the arrows, but her raging was well known and everyone was hiding their bows behind their backs and whistling. Then Frodo walked up, and asked, "What's going on?"

Everyone fell over. Again.