"I'm going to bed," Jason announced, kissing each of them on the cheek before backing out of the room, grinning. "Night, Jason," said Serena, daring to look at Bernie only once Jason had made a show of closing the door. They'd been sat next to one another on the sofa all evening, hands resting together between them. Excruciating. Wonderful. Now they searched one another's faces for a sign as to what happened next. Finally Serena found the courage and the second that she moved forward, Bernie pushed forward too. Their lips met and Serena gave another of those sweet little moans. This was really happening.
Bernie tentatively pushed her tongue into Serena's mouth and drew it back again, unsure of how fast this was going to move. It hadn't taken long for them to lose their nerve in the office, aware of the ward buzzing around them and Jason hovering outside the door. She thought about the way that Serena had looked at her as they pulled apart, the warmth in her eyes. How had she run away from her? How had it not been obvious that this was it, that she was the one? But of course it had been obvious, and that was what terrified her the most. In a matter of weeks she had gone from flirting across the desk to imagining a future with Serena. A long future. A happy future. Christ, wasn't that the scariest thing of all?
Her chain of thought was broken when she felt Serena's tongue play with hers. While Serena worried that she was clumsy in her desire, Bernie felt as though they were dancing; she could practically hear music. Daft woman, she told herself, smiling, and Serena took the smile as an invitation to press closer. Bernie traced her hand down Serena's side, arcing her thumb over her breast as she did; Serena gasped, kissed Bernie harder, and then drew back.
"What? Are you OK?" Bernie tried to look in to Serena's eyes, but they were cast down.
"I…" How was she going to say this? "I want this so much, Bernie. I've been thinking about it for weeks. But…" Bernie's heart raced.
"I don't know how to touch you."
A pause, and then Bernie laughed, gently. Serena's cheeks flashed red. "No, no, Serena, I'm not laughing at you. I'm not – " she broke off, pushing herself up off the sofa and straddling Serena's lap. "You know exactly how to touch me. How do you touch yourself?" An even deeper red crept across Serena's face, and Bernie clasped Serena's hands in hers.
"OK. How do you like to be touched?" Finally Serena lifted her eyes to meet Bernie's. "Well, I…" she faltered.
Bernie eased the blouse from Serena's left shoulder and left a slow, wet line of kisses from her earlobe down her neck and along her collar bone. When she drew back Serena's eyes were closed. "Yep," Serena said, struggling to find the words for how this felt, a trail of explosions on her skin. Bernie smiled and undid the few buttons on the front of Serena's top; she could see Serena's breathing was fast and shallow as she ran the tip of her index finger along the line of Serena's bra. It looked new, and her heart swelled further at the thought of Serena picking it out this morning. The hope that she must have felt. That she had so nearly crushed. Idiot. She kissed Serena again as she felt for the clasp to undo her bra. "May I?" she said, her hand hovering waiting for Serena's reply. "Please," Serena whispered, her eyes still closed in reverie. By the time she felt Bernie's mouth on her breast she felt sure that she was dreaming after all, but when she cried out Bernie's panicked reaction brought her round. There they both were, panting, Bernie on her lap with her hand across her lips to stifle the delighted yelp that threatened to summon Jason. Serena bit a finger, playfully.
"It's OK, he won't come back in," she said. "He understands that much about relationships." They both smiled coyly at the word.
"Do you want to…" Bernie trailed off, her eyes moving towards the hallway.
"Yes," said Serena, with a certainty that thrilled both of them.
"Thank god, because my knees are killing me," Bernie laughed, as she stood up. "We might feel like teenagers but…" She held out a hand to pull Serena up as she drew her blouse around her, and then led her to where she knew Serena's bedroom was.
As soon as they were inside Bernie eased Serena back against the door and kissed her. 'Teenagers' is about right, Serena thought, as she pushed her pelvis against Bernie, eliciting a deep, guttural moan that vibrated in Serena's mouth. It was just about the most delicious thing that Serena could ever think of happening to her.
More urgently than before, Bernie kissed her way down Serena's neck, stopping briefly to kiss each nipple before working down her stomach. Serena's skin was soft and dewy and Bernie could think of nothing else. As she fumbled with the button on Serena's trousers she felt a touch on her shoulder.
"Sorry," she said, looking up. "We don't have to. I'm sorry." She pushed her hair off her face.
"No, believe me, I want to," Serena said as she watched Bernie's tousles falling immediately back into their habitual state of chaos. "But I don't know if I'll be able to stay standing if we do." She smiled at Bernie, who once again got to her feet and took Serena's hand, leading her to stand next to the bed. She switched on a lamp and gazed at Serena – topless, mouth in an open smile – in the light that it cast. "You're beautiful," she said. This time Serena didn't stop her as she reached for the button and eased her out of her trousers. She leaned in and kissed Serena hard on the lips.
"Don't I get to see you?" Serena teased. She unbuttoned Bernie's shirt, watching as Bernie's chest heaved and fell as she unclasped her bra. Serena had never seen a woman like this, and for a moment she hesitated. Had it always been there, this incredible desire that she now felt? Bernie watched her, absorbed in interpreting the tiny shifts in Serena's expression. She took off her own trousers and watched as Serena surveyed every inch of her. What am I supposed to do? Serena wondered. What if I get it wrong?
"What do you want to do?" Bernie asked her, as if she'd heard every thought.
"I… I…" Serena sat on the edge of the bed, her lips inches from Bernie's stomach. She felt delirious, intoxicated. Bernie was every bit as muscular and magnificent as she had imagined. "I don't know, Bernie, but you're glorious. Glorious." She kissed Bernie's stomach and there was that delicious gasp again. When they looked at one another again, each had tears in her eyes. "I want you," Bernie said, authoritatively. Serena obeyed, laying back in the middle of the bed, the winter duvet soft and warm beneath her.
"Close your eyes," said Bernie, half whispering.
Again, Serena obeyed. She was more aroused than she could ever remember being; if Bernie even thought about climbing on top of her, she knew she would come, hard and fast. Instead she felt Bernie ease her legs apart, felt her climb on to the bed… felt her place her head between her legs and… and nothing. Tangled blonde hair tickling the insides of her thighs; warm breath mocking her keening body. No touch. She opened one eye to look down.
"Don't!" Bernie said forcefully, and the split second that Serena's eye closed she flashed the tip of her tongue across Serena's clit, sliding two fingers inside her, pushing upwards against her G-spot. Serena exploded in to noise, squealing with pleasure. Instinctively she drew her knees up and placed her feet on Bernie's thighs, angling her hips upwards. Bernie slowed her hand right down and pushed her tongue flat against Serena's clitoris, watching her stomach crunch again and again. Serena moaned quietly, as if in a blissful state of disbelief, each time.
How could this beautiful, innocent woman have found her way in to my life? Bernie wondered, her kisses creeping back up Serena's body.
How can it never have felt like this before? Serena wondered as Bernie's lips skipped up her torso. And what happens next?