LITTLE TALKS

Well, tell her that I miss our little talks
Soon it will all be over, buried with our past

Sebastian turns his head to see a silhouette from which the voice is coming. Looking up, his eyes meet Kurt's. It's been a while since he's been able to look into his eyes without one of them blinking right back away. But as it seemed now, they were both having the opposite problem.

"You shouldn't be smoking." Kurt repeats and the moment has faded. Because that did it for Sebastian to look away – the fact Kurt has forgotten why he was smoking. What it meant for him.

'You shouldn't be smoking' was exactly what he said to him the first time he busted Sebastian. But Kurt being him, soon he understood why and never reminded him not to again.

Sebastian felt bitter saliva flooding the insides of his mouth. He swallowed and forced his gaze back to Kurt. Opening his mouth, he froze. Something about Kurt made him stop, mainly because he represented everything he wanted to be. In the very beginning of their relationship he taught it was pathetic and weak – being so compassionate and opened. He threw insults and snarky remark one right after the other. After getting to know Kurt that changed, insults grew into playful teasing. After breaking up he can't get his voice to work, obviously.

Pitiful, Smythe. You are pitiful.

Thinking this, he gave up, lifting and dropping his shoulders in silent whatever. Kurt sighed.

Few moments has passed like this – Sebastian taking a long drags and then blowing up the smoke in one long string supporting his weight on the building's edge and Kurt silently watching a few steps behind him, gaze flickering between Sebastian's form and the beautiful way the smoke curled up in cold night's breeze, world going silent and still.

Throwing burned cigarette away somewhere to the streets, it took all of Sebastian's willpower to put a lazy cocky smile on, to light up his eyes, to turn around playfully, to make his voice mocking and generally make his presence pre-Kurt before he spoke.

"So is your royal highness going to be standing there all night long? We wouldn't want us to get cold, now would we?"

Kurt's face went pale, paler than usual, Kurt's skin was always pale but it got this pinky shade whenever it was kissed, hold on, no… and he burst out laughing. What the hell? Sebastian did everything right, right? The snark, face, posture, all that stuff.

Then Kurt did something that made even less sence – he closed the distance between them and hugged him.

"I missed you, idiot." Muttering so quietly, Sebastian wasn't sure he was supposed to hear.

Don't say anything stupid. "You see me every other day." So much for that.

Kurt distangled himself and hummed.

"I might see you, but that doesn't mean you are there." He turned his beautiful face toward the city skyline and lowered himself to be in similar position as Sebastian before - supporting himself on his elbows, while Sebastian looked at him leaning on his back. "Not for me, anyway. Not anymore." He was whispering again. Sebastian heard though and it struck him by surprise.

Was Kurt missing him just as madly as he did?

The question lingered in his mind again, but Kurt seemed so fine, settling in a new apartment and promotion in his internship. Sebastian was positive he moved on.

And knowing that maybe he hadn't made Sebastian unreasonably angry. Because Kurt is the one who is supposed to be fine, after all it's not like he had his heart crushed for the first time.

Take Sebastian – to whom everyone told he hadn't had one and they were right. Sebastian hadn't felt a damn thing before Kurt waltzed into his life and decided to break through his walls. And at his most vulnerable, Sebastian's heart felt like it's been stabbed.

It's even worse than any crappy teenage flick pictures it as. He wasn't able to function for days after the break-up, his head and body both hurt so much. It was the first time he ever stopped to wonder why it was called 'a broken heart' when it felt like it was being ripped and then stepped on.

It just wasn't fair. Sebastian knew it was selfish to feel this way, but he couldn't help it.

So he looked at Kurt with wary eyes, drinking in every detail of his face, looking for a clue or something.

"I don't know, Kurt. It feels like… it feels like I am always there for you."

How true was that. Sebastian didn't even want to come to this stupid party that's going on downstairs but the impulse of proving someone that he was over Kurt got him to get up from the bed (where he's been sniffing Kurt's pillow). And of course – fate being a bitch it always is – Kurt was at the party. Kurt is always the one he runs into, always his destination.

When Kurt says nothing, Sebastian tells him "I missed you too." Quietly, like Kurt's has been but enough to do the spell.

A little moment, a little talk. Important for their future, somehow. Both of them feeling it, the air was thick with importance. Point of no return, when Kurt inches forward, staring at Sebastian's mouth and stops when they are millimeters apart, those blue eyes looking up to meet green like earlier, when they acknowledged of each other's presence from across the room.

Kurt holding his gaze leaned, not with lips but with his nose and he caressed Sebastian's cheek that way as in silent plea. Sebastian lifted his hand and tucked his fingers in Kurt's hair, moving his mouth toward his and closing the distance. It wasn't a kiss kiss at first, just a closed peck with Sebastian's tongue tracing a line of Kurt's bottom lip. Kurt let out a broken sigh, his arms found Sebastian's waist and both were comfortably leaned against each other and their kiss deepened, grew more urgent and passionate. Sebastian's head was spinning, he was getting drunk on Kurt's taste and it was easy to let his hands wander. Soon he had Kurt sitting on the building's edge with himself slotted between his thighs. They were kissing each other slowly, every movement precise. From time to time they stopped and looked in each other's eyes only to fall back in.

They missed this, they missed them. And of course, later on something will be done about that. There will be another little talk after this moment. On and on.

Right now, this was important.

Sight of New York behind Kurt's back, nothing to rely on. Way eyelashes flicker when they touch bare skin, nothing more beautiful. To kiss and to be kissed, nothing so easy.

Just let me go, we'll meet again soon
Now wait wait wait for me

Notes: This is a first time I am writing anything ever hence I am so sorry, this doesn't really make that much of sence but it's been in my head forever. Title as well as lyrics are from song Little Talks by Of Monsters & Men. Their lyrics give me all the Kurtbastian feels.