Defeat.
The word was course, disgusting. Oh, I loved to use it as I slayed my enemies. One by one they'd fall, and "Defeat!" I'd cry "Defeat!" It was a battle cry to let my soldiers know that we had defeated, not been defeated. And now, will I have to admit that I had now actually been defeated? That I had to accept defeat and move on? Never. After all, I haven't lost…yet. Nor will I!
Defeat;
Such a bitter word, so full of losses. Every king in Narnia, every Lord, and every man who lost a war or died in battle has had to accept that word. Defeat is the payment every loser pays. I'm not a loser! I've ruled Narnia for a hundred years! I have won! I am the victor! I am the champion! I am the Empress of the Lone Islands, the Queen of all Narnia! I am not a loser!
But what had the son of Adam meant when he said
"The Beaver's said something about Aslan!"
"Aslan?" I asked. "Where?" his words had sent a chill down my spine. I had been frozen stiff with fear, but why should I?
"He's... a stranger here you majesty...he can't be expected to know anything." Tumnus whimpered from his cell. He was promptly punished.
"I… left before they said anything." The boy answered, looking at the pitiful creature.
Oh, if Tumnus hadn't given him that pathetic look he might have told me. I suppose I'll find out later. But this could mean that I need to lay the pieces in a new stratagem. Narnia was mine! Narnia was done for! Now this? Who does Aslan think He is? He's just a Lion. I can handle Him… can't I?
Oh course I can, what am I thinking? Aslan can't defeat me. I can… I can… I did defeat. All of Narnia! He can't… Oh, what am I doing? Denial won't solve my problems. Maybe I should have killed the boy why I had the chance. Perhaps I still do. Then again, his family will still probably come after him if he's alive. But, if they still thought he was alive, that's the same. And, if he dies, what can THREE children do to take my throne? The prophecy says two sons of Adam, and two daughters of Eve. If I kill him, haven't I won? Doesn't that make only one son of Adam? But what if he is joined by another? Was he lying? Would killing him stop them all? But on the other hand, is he under Aslan's protection? Has Aslan really come back?
I don't know…I don't know! So many questions unanswered, so many doubts untouched. And while I cower in a corner, Aslan is preparing an army.
"If it's a war Aslan wants, it's a war he shall get." I had said. But was I so sure? Can I really face him? I suppose He is just a lion, and what can He do to me? He can roar. But is that all? He cannot wield a sword, nor a bow, or an ax. Is He defenseless? His people…MY people love Him, but why? What is so great about Him?
He is just a Lion.
Isn't He? What does He have that I do not? Some hidden power and respect? I cannot comprehend why everyone fears Him, and expects me to fear Him. However, I do not! There is nothing…nothing that He has. It isn't as if He can change the rules, or alter the Deep Magic. He can't change death. He wouldn't be able to bring Edmund back to life. Perhaps I shall kill him. I could stop worrying then. I will. The son of Adam will die.
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"Your Majesty," the Minotaur interrupted her thoughts. He had been watching the Queen, sitting there in the forest, thinking and pondering in earnest, and it worried him. If she was so concerned, should he be?
She looked up. "What is it?" She glared at him. Her cold eyes told him "It had better not be bad news."
He gulped.
"Your Majesty," he said. "The prisoner..."
"WHAT IS IT?" she roared, standing up. She was even taller than he was, and she loomed over him.
"The prisoner…" he began again "he has…escaped."
"What?!" she cried, ready to grab his throat if not for his thick, furry neck and sharp fangs. "How was this possible? I stationed guards with strong arms and able bodies and sharp dangerous weapons? Have they killed each other off? Out with it! Speak, you fool!" she screamed.
"It was…Aslan" he said.
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What?
How could he raid an encampment and kill thirty animals in the few moments I had taken for doubt? He is just a Lion. Well, I would not be caught off guard again. The Son of Adam will die.
I will make sure of it.