Notes: This will be a multi-chaptered SnK fic. It picks up somewhere around chapter 50/end of chapter 50. Main pairing is Eren/Mikasa. Armin might be paired with someone as well (Annie or Historia; not so sure which one is best). One sided Jean/Mikasa. There are major plot spoilers for those who have not read the manga up to chapter 56.
A Beautiful World Chapter 1
"I... I was useless... in the end, I still couldn't do anything..."
The screams and cries around him were unceasing. He couldn't even make out the faces of the corpses anymore. They were all blurred into one, single, endless, horrifying look of agony.
Just how many of his friends' lives had been snuffed out because of him? How many of his comrades had sacrificed themselves to those monsters for his sake?
And now, he was next. Was this his purpose? To be another face, another corpse, another pile of unrecognized bones to be burned in the bonfires?
The looming, terrifying smile above him jarred Eren back into reality. Hannes-san's blood trickled down the cruel mouth of the Titan, dribbling down the same mouth that had clenched and broken the bones of his mother. The same mouth that would soon consume Mikasa and him. The same mouth that would relish in their spilt blood and shattered skeletons.
Mikasa.
Eren's anguished mind focused on his foster sister next to him. Mikasa had been seriously injured as well. From the looks of it, a multitude of her ribs had been broken, and maybe a leg or an ankle. Dark splotches of red stained her uniform, which was ripped and tattered in more places than Eren could count. Their 3DMGs were more or less in the same useless condition as their clothing.
It was over, Eren thought.
For the first time since his mother died, Eren cried. Sobs tore through his body. He tried to speak, but words, apologies, and curses tumbled out of his mouth like a hopelessly run-down supply cart.
In the end, he had been useless. He was just another casualty to be jotted down. Despite his dreams, his passion, and his sense of purpose, Eren Jaeger had failed. Not even his stupid Titan powers could save Mikasa and him.
It had all been a cruel joke.
"I've... always been worthless... since the very beginning..."
It was true. Eren could still recall the countless days when he had gone home, bruised and black-eyed, while Mikasa did not have so much as a scratch on her soft skin. His mother's alarmed voice still rang clear in his head.
"You need to stop being so reckless and always have Mikasa save you, Eren. Be a man and protect Mikasa for once, okay?"
He almost laughed at that one.
Because even though Eren had always tried to protect Mikasa, and even though Mikasa never seemed to need any protection but rather mothered over Eren instead, this was the one time that Mikasa needed protecting. The one time that she was critically injured and unable to fight. The one time in possibly all eternity for Eren to swoop in, blades barred, and defend Mikasa valiantly with his life.
The one time that things could be what they always should have been from the start.
Nope.
He was completely and utterly unable to protect the one person in his life that he had sworn to protect in the moment that she actually needed help. And this was the biggest slap to Eren's face of all time. He could easily picture the creator of the universe laughing his head off at him.
Eren struggled to hold back the tears.
"Mikasa... I'm sorry that... I was useless..."
He managed to choke out the words, coughing up a generous amount of blood while doing so.
Humanity's last hope had lost all hope.
"I'm sorry I couldn't... protect you like I always said I would... I'm sorry for pulling you into this... I'm sor-"
Eren's string of apologies was cut short by Mikasa's hand over his mouth. Despite all the rigorous fighting she had gone through every day, her hand was impossibly soft.
"Eren... that's not true."
She feebly dragged herself closer to him and grasped his hands. Her thumbs traced the contours of his palm, sending little arcs of electricity up Eren's arm.
"There is something... that I've always wanted to tell you," Mikasa muttered.
"Thank you, Eren, for always being there for me."
Eren's gaze never unlocked itself from the pools of emotion in her eyes, completely numbed by her words.
What do you mean, Mikasa? I've failed. I've nev-
She continued, "Thank you for teaching me how to live."
They were kneeling on the bloodstained ground. The sheer proximity between the two of them made Eren's heart do somersaults.
Why am I feeling this way towards Mikasa, of all people... And why now? Aren't we about to die?
She's not your sister, a little voice inside him muttered.
Mikasa's hands parted from his own and touched the maroon scarf that Eren had gave her years ago.
"Thank you... Eren... for..."
Their lips were almost touching at this point in time. He could feel the warmth of her breath gracing his face. Words were struggling out of Mikasa's mouth.
For what, Mikasa? What have I ever done for you that's so important...?
"It's now or never," Mikasa thought.
Even if everything around me is crumbling, I need to let him know... if this is really it... then... maybe these feelings... were the truth all along...?
"...thank you for wrapping his scarf around me."
She closed the distance between them, pressing her lips gently against his cheek.
Eren's brain nearly short-circuited. The scent of Mikasa's hair, her kiss, and the mere touch of her lithe hands... it was too much to handle. There was only one question in his mind.
How could she be so beautiful when the world around them was a nightmare?
Mikasa let out a small sigh as Eren ran his hands through her silken hair. He had always done that when they were children, but now, it felt extremely different. It was a good different.
The looming hand above him jarred him out of their makeshift embrace.
Eren clenched his teeth.
How stupid was I... why did I give up?
"I'll wrap that scarf..."
Flames danced around Eren's fists. The Titan's colossal hand inched closer to them by the second.
"...around you as many times as it takes!"
I'm still fighting... because...
Eren stood up, ignoring the searing pain in his legs, and poised to strike.
...I still need to see the ocean...
Images of his childhood flashed into his mind. He remembered Armin's tales of the world outside the walls; his tales of icy fields and fiery waters. With a surging cry, Eren swung a single fist at the monster.
...and most importantly... I need to live... in order to be with Mikasa.
Two fists, vengeance and cruelty, humanity and Titan-kind, connected on the battlefield.
The world is cruel...
There was a flash of white.
...but it is also very beautiful.
Notes: Well, that's Chapter 1! This was essentially a rewrite of Chapter 50 of the manga as a introduction of sorts to the story. I started off everything on a bit of a serious note, and because of the situation it was really difficult to put romantic moments in there. Also, Mikasa never kisses Eren in this scene during the manga; it was something I added. In a more laid back setting, it would have been easier, but this is my first time writing something remotely romantic or "shippy," and I'm still learning the ropes as I go.
I tried. Reviews would be very much appreciated. More is on the way.