When I was younger I use to think that being invincible was a good thing because I wouldn't be in the risk of being bullied or made of in any kind of way. I mean nobody cares about the quiet shy girl that barely ever talks. Why waste your time bothering someone who doesn't even care enough about herself to care of herself. But as I started to get older I realized that maybe being invincible wasn't really such a good thing, especially if it mean that most girls wouldn't bother talk to you so it made it impossible having friend and it also meant that guys paid zero to no attention to me, so you know the answer to my dating life. I'm pretty sure the only people in the world that know I exist are my family and teachers. I think it was around fourteen when I realized how much pain being shy and invincible could cause you and now at sixteen I know that now nothing will probably change. All can really do Is get through my last two years of high school and hope that I get into a good college and can get away from some of these people.
"April can you come here for a second please?" I heard my teacher Mrs. Smith say as everyone began packing up all of their things and heading towards the door, lucky for me it's my last period so I don't have to worry about being late to my next class.
"Mrs. Smith you asked for me to stay?" I was pretty curious as to what she could possibly need me for. I mean n=most teachers didn't really ever ask for me to speak to them because they just saw me as one of the good students who always turn in the work on time and did well on their test. But Mrs. Smith was a different kind of teacher, I remember when I was a freshmen I use to come here to eat my lunch because she would allow students to do that and I didn't really have anyone to spend time with. But over time she would see me so often that she began to start talking to me and over time I realized that I could easily go to her for advice when I needed it. I mean don't get me wrong I have my family and I know that I can talk to them if I really needed it but I also know that sometimes it's easier to talk to an adult that just wants to be there to help you not just be there because they are your family. I didn't really have any girlfriends that I could turn to when I needed it, some people might say it's sad but my teacher was the closes thing I had to a friend.
"Yes April as you know you are the best student that I have and I know that a lot of your other teachers would probably agree with me. I was wondering if perhaps you would be willing to tutor one of the students who aren't quite academically achieved as you are." I wasn't really sure what I should say to that. I mean I'm horrible at talking with people my own age and I know I would be horrible when it came to a one-on-one session.
"I don't know Mrs. Smith I mean that might have to something that I really think about. You know how I tend to get around people and how much focus I put into my school work."
"I know that April and that's why I've chosen to ask you for this favor. I wouldn't come to you if I knew this person didn't really need it. The only problem with him is that he does not put enough focus on his school work. I know that if he tried as hard on his school work as he did in football there would be no problem. But he needs a push and I think that you could be the one who gives him just that." I don't know when it happened but I think that at some point Mrs. Smith may have started smoking crack. I mean why else would she be asking me April Gonzales, the shyest girl in the entire school to tutor another person, and a jock of all people. She might think that I'm capable of something like that but I know for a fact that is not a possibility.
"April I know that's what you believe but I really feel that if you were to tutor him it could actually help both of you. I mean he's a slacker who needs to learn to take things more seriously and you're a quite girl that has to start opening up to the world." I knew that everything she was telling me was right but that didn't mean that I still wanted to do it. But at the same time I have always thought about tutoring people I just knew that it was something that I might love to do, but I was just scared that I would end up screwing up or embarrassing myself.
"I don't know if I can handle tutoring someone, and knowing that their grades are in my hands. I mean I'm good at learning and studying but that doesn't mean that I could teach all of those things to another person."
"I know that's what you think but I know that you could easily do it if you really tried. Yes it might be a bit of a struggle at first but I'm sure that he will probably have the exact same problem as you. How about this you try it out until his next text and if he hasn't approved then you could stop tutoring him." Well I guess that did sound like a good deal and I know that Mrs. Smith won't let me leave this room with letting me first say yes.
"Well I guess that could probably work, but when is his next test, and who exactly is this guy you want me to start tutoring you still haven't told me his name."
"Okay his next test is in his English class and that's in two week and the guy is Jasper Whitlock." As soon as the name left her mouth I felt as though I could no longer breathe. Out of every person in the entire school she had to ask me to tutor the most popular person in the school, the boy who at eleven years old gave me my first kiss, the boy who at twelve asked me to be his girlfriend, and finally the one who at fourteen broke my heart by leaving me to be with the popular cheerleader and who now at sixteen is the one boy I can't seem to forget and the boy that makes my life miserable.
"No I'm sorry Mrs. Smith but I cannot tutor Jasper. I mean if it was anybody else that I would do it but I cannot handle tutoring Jasper I can't even be in the same room with him for ten minutes let alone an hour every single day."
"April I understand that you and jasper don't get along very well but he really needs the help, other than history he isn't passing any of his classes. He really needs to pull up his grades, especially if he wants to graduate and wants any chance at getting into a decent college. Isn't there any way you can look past the animosity you two seem to have towards each other, just for an hour a day." Mrs. Smith believes the reason that Jasper and I can't seem to get along is because he's the jerk jock and I'm the quiet girl who doesn't act like how he acts, but I've never been able to tell anyone the real reason that I can't really get along with him.
"The only way that I could work with him is if he agreed to work with me without any kinds of problems. I mean no more constant bickering or name calling and he has to do whatever I say when I say, and he has to focus at all times and I don't want any slacking off."
"Wow April I don't think I've ever heard you sound so demanding, it's good to finally hear you like this and just so you know Jasper as already agree to all of these things as well."
"Well that's good but does he know that I'm the one you were going to ask, because I don't want to have to deal with any issues from him." The last thing I wanted to hear were a bunch of moans and complaints from Jasper Whitlock. I wish I didn't have to hear anything from his mouth but I knew that wasn't even a small possibility.
"Yes and he agrees to all of these agreements as well, now the only problem is that since jasper has football practice after school the tutoring sessions would have to be after his practice so it would have to be at either one of your houses or the library or something." Oh great so not only do I have to tutor Jasper but now I have to do it around his time, seriously what the hell have I done to receive this punishment right now.
"That's great I have to work around the great jasper Whitlock's schedule, so now I have to stay after school and wait for him to finish football before I can even start tutoring him." I know she could tell that I wasn't very happy about this situation, it's one thing to ask me to tutor him but it's another thing to make me wait for him to finish his precious football. The football that five years ago he said he would never play.
"I know that the situation isn't exactly ideal but the good part is that you will ways be able to stay and finish up some of the homework you get assigned for that day or you could use the time to make sure you lesson is sorted out so that way you will be prepared to teach him. Please April just two weeks and then we can go from there."
"Alright I will do it, just tell jasper we can start tomorrow after his football practice, I will meet him at the library and that he better not be late because it is the only chance he will get to prove that he is serious about his learning."
"Okay I'm glad to hear that and just to help you his English teacher Mr. Mathews gave me a list of subjects that he should know and be prepared for because anything could be on that test."
"Thank you, Mrs. Smith and I promise to do the best that I can for the tutoring. Like I said only two weeks and if it turns out that we don't have any problems then I might keep going." With that I said goodbye and made to sure to take the list with me so I was prepared for tomorrow's lesson. I just hope that jasper shows up and doesn't flake on me this time unlike my birthday two years ago, the day that I was planning to tell him that I loved him. As I start walking towards my locker, I think back to the day when I first met Jasper in sixth, the day I thought he would always be in my life.
I remember being such a nervous wreck when I first started sixth grade I didn't know anybody so I was terrified as to who I was going to be hanging out with now. As soon as I walked into the class I saw him, I mean he would be impossible to miss, he was wearing a pair of tight blue jeans, a plaid red and white shirt tucked into his jeans and a pair of cowboy boats. At the very moment I knew that I wanted him to be my friend, because any one who dressed like themselves instead of trying to follow the crowd was definitely someone worth getting to know better. I didn't get to talk to him during the class because the teacher had done assigned seating and our tables were at opposite ends of the room. So I sat there during the entire class looking towards him whenever I was sure he wouldn't see me, he looked like a really friendly guy and he was a bit cute with his curly blonde hair. My opportunity to talk with him came during lunch when I saw him sitting alone at one of the tables in the cafeteria, now usually I was a pretty shy person but I really wanted to get to know him better and I really wanted to make some new friends and I had a feeling he could be the one. I slowly walked up to the table and wasn't sure if I should just sit down or ask him if I could sit with him so I stood behind him for a few seconds kind of fidgeting on my feet back and forth.
"Are you just going to keep standing there or are you gonna join me." I heard him say in a thick southern accent and I couldn't believe how great he sounded.
"Uhmm yeah I guess I can uhmm sit if that's alright with you." I felt so stupid because I knew that I sounded like a complete idiot stuttering over my words and I remember tripping a little over my own feet before sitting down. I slowly started eating my lunch not sure I if should just talk or stay completely silent, so instead I chose to focus on my lunch. I think we were about ten minutes into lunch when he finally spoke.
"So you just gonna keep on eating your lunch or are you gonna tell me your name." I was completely silent for a second only focusing on the sound of his voice when I finally realized that he asked me a question and that I should probably answer him, if he still wanted to know my name that is.
"Oh well my name is April, April Gonzales it is really nice to meet you." I said with a small tentative smile.
"Well darling it's nice to meet you to and my name is Jasper Whitlock. Just so you know you don't have to be so shy I aint gonna bite, hard that is." I couldn't help but laugh when he said that last part, especially with that crooked smile that he had on his face.
"Well I'm glad to hear that do you think I could ask you were you are from, I mean I'm guessing your new here because I don't remember you in elementary school plus you have a southern accent." This time it was him that started laughing, but I could tell it wasn't a mocking one, more like a friendly you sound sweet kind of smile.
"Well that's very observant of you darling, see my family and I just moved here over the summer. I'm originally from Austin Texas, but than my dad got this job promotion and that's when we moved down here to California, to a city that I have never heard of, I mean what do you do in such a small town like this?"
"Well you know San Lorenzo it's really that small, it's just not a town that many people hear of, unless they live around here." I said with a small laugh. "But you know there are plenty of things to do, movies, bowling, mall, mini golfing of course you also have to drive to another city sometimes."
"Well maybe you could show me some of the things we could do around here; you know we have our feet and the bus." I was kind of shocked, did he just ask me if I wanted to hang out with him.
"Did you just ask me to hang out with you? I mean are you sure that you want to hang out with me, you barely know me?" I said starting to get a bit shy again, he seemed like a nice guy but I didn't want to risk getting my hopes up to than him tell me that I was just a loser that he didn't want to hang out with.
"Oh I'm sure darling see I might have only lived here for a few weeks and this might only be my first day, but I already know that you are going to be the coolest girl to hang out with. And I would love nothing more than to become your friend, if you like it as well."
Sometimes I think back to days like that and just wish I could back to sixth grade when things were so much simpler. When we were best friends and completely inseparable. I rememberthat he would always say that he would make me his wife one day, or that he would make me his wife when were old enough and have stable jobs. Why things couldn't just have stayed that simple, why did high school and popularity have to ruin everything so easily? He promised that it would be him and I forever but I guess when that meant not getting invited to the cool parties or dating a cheerleader it wasn't worth anything.