Sophia had return to the Silvana after visiting Alex's memorial. She entered his room for a second time since the battle with Delphine. The first was to gather his personal belonging to leave at the site. This time it was to reminisce and perhaps have a closer look at the man that remains a mystery to her. She sat at his desk and took a moment for herself to fell the energy around her. The picture frame containing Alex, Euris, Valca, and Head caught her eye. The picked it up and felt something attached to the back.
The Letter
Dear, Sophia
I've known that this battle would be my last. The odds are against me and my guilt compels for the battle to take me. I believe you've known too, but that never stopped you from hoping. I gave up on hope a long time ago. A coward that's been running from life in order to seek revenge. You're much braver and stronger than I, I'm sorry if I made you fell otherwise. I know it's selfish to seek revenge, but more that one life was lost on that mission, although I admit that losing Euris hurts the most. Valca and Head never saw how extraordinary Clause and Lavie became. I even took the only family they had left, Valca's wife, Justine, passed away six months after gave her the news of their death. Leaving behind my van ship in the place of their fathers was the least I could do. Besides a van ship pilot should never return without the navigator. I have not forgotten about the countless lives that have been lost because the peace message never arrived. There's nothing I can do to make it right, revenge is all I have. At least that's what I told myself.
Throughout this search, I've had you my by side, it's only fair that you know the feelings I have for you. The reason I kept you at arms length, was because of fear. I feared what you could give me and what I possibly would lose. My heart wanted happiness, my heart wanted comfort, and my heart wanted you. If I gave into my heart's desire, I feared that my resolve might weaken to do what I must. I know you could ease my pain, I know you could make it better with nothing more than smile. I have awoken from many dreams relieving the moments in the Grand Stream. A cold sweat running down my face, my heartbeat at a frantic pace, even the aroma of blood I could almost taste, as if it happened that same day. Each time preventing myself from running to your quarters, telling you what I just felt and leaving myself in your care. I have no right to; it would be as if the same women I went to for help, was the same women that I failed. However, pleas understand that although you are both similar, I have not mistaken you for her. Sophia, your beauty is breathtaking. I have fought myself many times to not gaze deeply into your eyes, for I know I would be lost. Allowing my hair to obstruct my vision when talking directly to you has helped; although secretly I took pleasure in seeing your silk strands go unbridled. Just before the battle against the Urbanus, when you collided with by body in the elevator, I wanted to embrace you but did not. I fought many similar battles with myself, believing I won. In the end, I realized I completely lost. Somewhere along the way the queen captured by heart.
I know that if things had been different, then we would have been different. I'm sorry for not telling you in person. I love you.
I wish only the best for you, my queen, my friend, my love.
Sincerely,
Alex Row
Don't worry, I'll remember what you told me, however, you are so much more to me.
Note: First piece of work.
Warning: Might make more. Depends on how drunk I am. Right Now, I'm pretty wasted.