A/N: This takes place just after the Ark battle and the capturing of the Akuma Egg factory. Goes no farther than Volume 14 of D. Gray-Man. I do not own D. Gray-Man… or American Idol.

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Exorcist Idol

From the files of Komui, stuffed in the deepest, darkest corner of his desk.

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"Wake up, everybody!!!!" Komui's voice echoed down the halls. "I have a super-important announcement!"

"I swear, one of these days, I'm going cut him up into little tiny bits and set them on fire and then bury the remains in a deep hole and laugh." Kanda muttered some more incoherent phrases that will not be repeated.

"I hope it's not something that will turn out really badly, like Komlin…" Allen said, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Mmm…no kidding." Lavi yawned hugely. "It really better be important if he's waking us up before noon on our days off. They're bound to be numbered." The last three days or so had been obnoxiously quiet. The quiet part referring to the Earl not making any attacks and the obnoxious part being Link getting in the middle of everything. And Lavi trying to make sure he got on his nerves…

Once all of the exorcists (and several random people from the Science Department and a small group of finders) were gathered in Komui's usually spacious office, he got to his news.

"Just so everybody knows now, we are going to have a fun competition planned until…whenever." The people in the room all groaned loudly; Komui might be jinxing them out of a couple of weeks of rest.

"Nii-san, what exactly would this competition be?" Lenalee asked. For an odd reason, she had a feeling that it could very easily be another Kanda Massacre and she wanted to be prepared for the absolute worst. Or best…it all depended.

"Good question! It is…" Komui took on an epic pose. "The Black Order's first ever… EXORCIST IDOL!"

"YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!" Kanda shouted, and the 12 nearest to him grabbed his extremities in hopes to contain him. "You woke us up for THAT?!"

"C'mon Kanda, it could be fun!" Lavi said. "You won't know 'til ya try it!"

"Yeah, c'mon, Kanda!" Several others chorused, including a bunch of random people who no one actually knew. Boy, is Alestina gonna be ticked when he finds out a bunch of people got past him… Kanda thought. Note to self: avoid gatekeeper at all costs for the next week.

"Okay now, time to tell you about my latest invention for this competition!"

"NO MORE KOMLINS!" Everyone cried out at once and the shout shook the Black Order's walls.

"Ah ha ha ha! Nope! Just these machines that tell you what song you're going to sing based off your emotions at the current time! The only downside is you don't get to practice in advance, but I don't think anyone will mind!" Komui paused. "And NO ONE can back out! Every Exorcist participates!" He tacked on as an afterthought.

"Komui…" Reever sighed. "That idiot never thinks things through."

"No kidding. We could probably have saved a lot of time and trouble if we just gagged and tied him each time he came up with one of these ideas." Lavi replied.

"Finally, we come to the issue of judges." Komui said. "The judges are…Myself, Reever and General Tiedoll!"

"WHAT?! You can't decide for us without asking us first! Some people have a lot of work to do!" Reever fumed.

"Take it easy, Reever. Think of it as a vacation!" Tiedoll, the ever-optimist, said. "One in which you don't actually go anywhere, but still! No work!"

Despite himself, Reever was pretty happy about the not-working situation.

After a fair amount of hullabaloo, everyone was ready for the epic vocal showdown that would take place over the next until further notice. Armed with vocal coaches, song lyrics, and microphones, they were ready for battle.

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A/N: This is probably the shortest chapter. They will get longer! And please review!