Disclaimer: Do not own any of these characters or the springs.
Hi, I return from the dead. College has afforded me enough fair time to try out a silly idea that came to me- in a very, very boring Statistics class. Even if you know the Ranma ½ hijinks, I'll be handling them a bit differently. Hilarity and chaos await.
XX
On a whim very uncharacteristic of Pein, Itachi found himself on a mission that had seemingly nothing to do with hunting down Jinchuuriki. Why exactly he and Kisame were wandering around in the Village of Rice seemed trivial in comparison to the larger scheme of things. With their members slowly dwindling, a side mission seemed superfluous. Orders were orders.
"Eh Itachi, what exactly was the point of dragging me al-"
A glare was enough to silence his blue partner. He was agitated enough as it was, but his keen senses were at least telling them they were close, very close to their destination.
XX
The puzzled look on Hidan's, face which was beginning to look like it was bordering on utter outrage, had unsettled Deidara enough to scoot politely away from the zealot.
"So let me get this straight. Itachi and Kisame get to go play around in some mother fuckin' HOT SPRINGS, while we are stuck on damn sentry duty in a hideout no one gives a shit about."
"Tobi thinks Pein must 'give a shit' about it, if we're guarding it."
"Shut up!"
Deidara hated to admit it but this exchange was pretty accurate at summing up the mood of their lovely excursion from their normal duties. Tobi's mere presence seemed to make Hidan even more profane than usual and watching Kakazu calculate his total earnings (most of which was obtained illegally) only proved entertaining for a brief while. Why was it that they always seemed to be stuck with the grunt work? Zetsu was probably out gardening or eating people or whatever the heck he does by himself. Pein was well, being crafty and secretive, which meant by the same token Konan was being crafty and secretive with him. It was times like this, that he kind of missed Sasori. The plate of food soaring in Deidara's general direction was enough to jar him from his brooding. He dodged, but barely.
"Sorry Deidara, I was aiming for Mr. fuckin' Loquacious over there. "
"Tobi does not understand why you have to be so hostile!"
"Because I'm stuck here and Jashin needs sacrifices right about now!"
In some other realm this scene might have been comical, but since this was a room of S-class ninjas, things could get messy, even messier than the miso soup oozing from the cracked bowl all over the floor. Someone was going to have to clean that up. Another fight someone was going to have to arbitrate. The looks on everyone's faces clearly said, 'I'm not doing it.' This of course led Hidan into another vulgar soliloquy. Insanity was mounting, very quickly. Deidara was sick of all of it.
"Calm down, yeah. Calm down, Hidan if it's any consolation, Itachi and Kisame are not on a "fuckin'" tour of hot springs, they are actually searching for rumored springs, with ancient curses, and I don't really think you need anymore curses."
A grunt was the reply. Well, it was better than nothing, he supposed. Hidan sighed frustrated and stalked off to go found a broom, muttering obscenities as he went. Kakakzu just continued about his business quietly. Deidara smirked to himself, order, or as close as they were going to get to it, was returned. Tobi however, looked nothing sort of spooked.
"Tobi does not like curses!"
Deidara sighed deeply. That made two of them. But since Pein was so set on finding those springs, surely they would only be of use to them, right?
XX
Kisame was leaning on Samehade while Itachi examined a nearby spring. They'd been wandering around for hours, and still no signs of luck. His partner got up shaking his head, another failure. Kisame shuffled after Itachi to the next spring, not too far off. They'd followed the informant's instructions exactly. Maybe it was just a rumor. Another wild goose chase, just what they needed.
"Kisame."
Itachi's soft voice called him over. He walked to stand beside his partner who was staring intently the spring in front of him. There's no telling what he could see with those eyes of his. Kisame had never really liked the Sharingan, but even he could sense there was a little something about this particular spring and the area they'd wandered into.
"I'll collect a sample to take back," Itachi stated. Kisame shrugged, it couldn't hurt. His partner pulled a small vial from his cloak, but as he knelt down to lean in to collect his specimen, something very uncharacteristic happened. Itachi slipped.
SPLASH!!
Itachi yelled startled, well startled for Itachi, which basically meant a rather loud grunt. In any case, it was enough for Kisame to point and laugh.
"Oh- wow. Some genius you are!" Kisame's laughter began to subside, once he realized that Itachi hadn't surfaced yet. He stepped a bit closer.
"I-Itachi?" He seriously did not want to have to go find another partner, or do something uncharacteristically heroic and save him. A loud gasp filled the air. Kisame smiled; he'd worried for nothing, Itachi was safe on the other side of the-
"Stop!" He pointed Samehade at the stranger who'd surfaced in the middle of the spring. "Where the heck's Itachi?"
The stranger with a deep tone of rogue hair nearing black and a pair of familiar looking red eyes glared impatiently at Kisame.
"As funny as this must seem to you Kisame, I'm right-"
Kisame fell back with a thud on the ground stunned and the girl in the water, stared at her hands in horror. Both of their eyes met, in realization, shock and in Kisame's case utter amusement.
A very feminine shriek pierced the air. Pein's cursed springs, seemed to be very real indeed.
XX
Just a fun light hearted story in the works. Tell me what you think. They'll be pairings of some sort later. This is really just my attempt to maybe start writing fanfiction again, and have a little fun while I'm at it. I do have a pretty serious Zetsu fic pretty much story boarded. But, we'll see how this goes. Read and review. Enjoy!