Hey all it has been forever since I've submitted something here. Just got inspired and thought to write it out. Was going to writing it out on this headcanon page but it turned out to be too long so enjoy. Once again I own nothing.
One day Pepper brings some exciting and terrifying news. She's Pregnant. She tells Tony immediately and all he can do is hug her tightly hoping she doesn't see his terrified face. Later that day as he is working with Bruce in the lab he starts mumbling, "How am I going to take care of kid?", "Am I going to end up just like my dad?", "They are going to hate me.", until he is almost in a full panic attack.
"Tony," Bruce asked calmly, "What happened?"
"Pepper's pregnant," he says in a terrified voice as he grips the wrench in his hand, "and I have no clue what to do." The wrench drops with a clatter. Tony grips the edge of the table hunched over trying to control his breathing.
"Isn't that good news," Bruce asked moving cautiously towards Tony.
"Good news," he shouts turning toward Bruce, "it's fucking fantastic news!"
He takes a deep breath and sighs, "Just one minor problem me."
He moves from the table and begins to pace around the lab moving closer to Bruce. "Do you seriously see me as a parent," he scoffs "Hey look everyone Ironman has a kid let's all try to take advantage of him," he shouts, "Oh man that kid is going to be so fucked up," he pauses for a minute catching his breath.
Tony speaks in a sarcastic voice, "Oh your Ironman's kid hey we're just going to steal you for ransom or worse kill you because hey your Ironman's kid." "Fuck!" He pushed all his tools from the table to the floor and just looks at the floor before staring at Bruce.
"That's not even the worse of it," he laughs, "The worst part is I'm afraid I'm going to be just like dear old dad, never there. Or better yet I'll become my dad a drunk that abuses his kid just because he interrupted me during a conference or because he scrapped his knee and mom was too passed out to take care of him. Dumb kid ran to good old Howard Stark for help and just received a slap and a drink shoved down his throat for his trouble." He laughs cryptically, "Stark's all time solution to anything alcohol."
Bruce reaches over and grabs him by the shoulders, "You're not going to become your father," he says looking in Tony's eyes. Tony just scoffs getting ready to say something else before Bruce interrupts him. "Look your Ironman so what. Does that mean your kid is going to be targeted? Yes but you have a team who is going to back you up. If anyone even tries to hurt the kid do you think any of the Avengers will stand for it? No. The person who even tries to touch your kid will have to answer to a very angry enormous green rage monster," he smirks.
Tony smiles a little at that but still looks determined to not listen to Bruce why because he's Tony Stark. "Look I know you think you'll turn out exactly like your dad but you won't. Would your dad have ever been willing to be Ironman, to give up his life for this planet or fly into a wormhole with a nuclear missile? Or would your dad have built an Avenger tower for people he just met supplied with a training room, archery room, labs, and individual rooms for said team? Would your dad have given up being a weapons engineer and instead develop clean energy, new medical technology, among other things?"
After each question Stark was shaking his head no. Feeling that Tony was looking a little better Bruce let go of Tony's shoulders. "Any asshole can make a kid; it takes a hell of a lot more to be a father. You're going to be fine," he smiles gently, "You're going to make mistakes but you're not going to be your father."
Tony smiles a little bit and grabs Bruce in a big hug, "You are the best Science Bro ever."
"Thanks."
It's no surprise later that when Tony asks Pepper if Bruce can be their unborn child's godfather she says yes immediately. Of course it takes a couple weeks for Bruce to agree to become the godfather. He's more worried that he'll smash the kid than protect him.
"Didn't you say and I quote 'The person who even tries to touch your kid will have to answer to a very angry enormous green rage monster' end quote."
"Yes but that was relating to AIM, kidnappers, those type of people," he struggles to get the words out waving his hands, "Tony I really can't be near people what makes you think I can be near kids?"
"Didn't you treat kids in Calcutta?"
"Yes."
"And was there ever an incident"
"No but…"
"No buts you're going to be the godfather," Tony says firmly, "end of story."
"Tony,"
"No seriously you are not allowed buts."
"Tony."
"Unless that's your thing butts… then butts all around."
"Tony," he yells exasperated. Once he has Tony's attention he begins his nervous tick of wringing his hands. "I really can't."
"Why," he asks staring at Bruce looking for a good answer.
"If…if I become a godfather it makes me think I'm in a family," he says quietly as he puts a hand through his hair.
"You do know you already have a family right."
"Tony."
"Just checking. Fine and that's bad because…" he says annoyed as he stares at Bruce.
"It reminds of what I can't have." Tony looks at Bruce surprised. Bruce takes off his glasses and begins to play with them in his hands. Tony is still trying to fully process what Bruce has said. An awkward silence has passed before anything is said.
"Tony I'm sorry," Bruce mumbled, "I'm just not safe enough to be around kids."
"That is such bullshit," snapped Tony Bruce tries to interrupt, "Nope not listening. Now you listen to me Bruce Banner." Tony raised his voice and poked Bruce in the chest, "You might turn into a giant green rage monster every now and then but guess what. He's not as dangerous as you make him out to be. Can he level this nation dam straight he can but he doesn't because you taught him how to work with a team. He never listened to orders before but damn if he didn't listen to Cap when he told him to smash those aliens. He's learning, you're learning so shut up and deal with it. Do you know how many times he's saved the team's life? More than I can count and he saved my life. So no you don't get to argue the "I'm not safe with kids cuz of Hulk" not happening."
Tony folded his arms looking like a spoil child before turning to look at Bruce again. "You sir are going to be the godfather whether you like it or not," he muttered quietly, "I'd really like it if you'd agree though."
Before Bruce could say anything Tony started up his rant again "First things first you are going to reboot this self-esteem issue right now, then you are going to make friends and I mean friends you can talk to not test tubes. Then you are going to find a girl or guy and get laid cuz this stress of "oh no hulk controls my life" is over. How long has it been since your last dry spell?"
"Tony," grunted Bruce as he smacked a hand to his head.
"Too long I tell you," Tony dictated, "But the first thing you are going to do is say "yes Tony I will love to be the godfather to your child." Tony grinned looking over at Bruce who only sighed before answering.
"Tony I would love to be the godfather of your child as long as," Bruce smirked, "they have their own suit."
"Why didn't I think of that the kid is going to need his own suit." Tony called Jarvis and asked for all information on Mark VII to be miniaturized for a small child. Having heard stranger orders Jarvis began to compile the data only making a few comments on what Pepper might have to say about his new project.
"How do you know it's a boy," asked Bruce.
"It's a father's intuition."
"He'll need a code name."
Tony just smirked before answering, "Iron baby."*
* iron baby was actually said/discussed in this youtube with Robert Downey Junior (Ironman) and Gwyneth Paltrow(Pepper Potts) called "Iron Man 3 : Robert Downey Jr et Gwyneth Paltrow à Paris" among other thing like Pepper's underpants XD here's the link but I don't know if you'll see it correctly watch?v=5C7dOf4EQs8