A/N: I'm actually attempting a full-length D/Hr fanfic, for once! I'm notorious for only managing oneshots and I don't know how this will go, but if it gets a good response I'll be spurred on, so I hope you enjoy it!

This story will not be epilogue compliant, and I strongly suggest you read the sensitive issue info below, as I will not be held responsible for how anyone reacts to the issues raised in this story. Don't say you weren't forewarned.

Sensitive Issue Info:

This story will contain references to and scenes of: self-injury, eating disorders and depression. This is not a light-hearted fic, so please bear that in mind.

Because the story contains self-injury and eating disordered behaviour, consider this a trigger warning. If you are in the process of recovery for either of these things, I would advise against reading as I would hate to be responsible for any relapses.

Chapter One

6th October, 1998. Saturday.

He was staring at her again.

Hermione tried hard to ignore him, and normally she would have found it easy to do, but today her head was not as clear as she was used to. And more than anything, sheer curiosity was keeping her from concentrating, and instead she found herself wondering why on earth he was staring at her so intently. After all, he had made it perfectly clear over the years that she was the last person he would want as an acquaintance, let alone anything more than that, so she found it hard to comprehend why he had suddenly taken such an interest in her over the past couple of weeks.

Out of the corner of her eye, Hermione saw him rise from his seat, partially hidden behind one of the many towering bookshelves in Hogwarts' library. He'd picked a spot which allowed him a perfect view of her sitting at her favoured desk, but conversely, that meant she could see him as well if she angled her head in just the right way.

He'd walked around to the front of his desk and had begun searching the many shelves for some book or another, although Hermione was half convinced he was just trying to get a closer look at whatever it was about her that was fascinating him so much. She shook her head slightly and tried to concentrate, once again, on her Arithmancy homework. After a few glances at the open copy of Numerology and Grammatica on the desk, she began to forget all about Draco Malfoy.

When she next checked her watch, Hermione realised with mild surprise that she'd been in the library for the majority of the day, and it had reached eight o'clock in the evening. Although that meant she'd accidentally missed dinner, she looked over her completed Arithmancy essay with a satisfied smile, having managed to complete three feet and five inches' worth of parchment analysing and explaining her accompanying number chart. She sat back, double checking that there were no spelling mistakes in her work, and rolled it up and slipped it into her bag once she was certain it was all correct.

She winced as her stomach gave a little grumble and was more thankful than usual that the library had mostly cleared out. She grimaced as she heard a small chuckle from her left; before she could stop herself, she'd turned and thrown a glare in the direction of Malfoy, only to find him closer than she'd anticipated at the desk closest to her. She frowned at his smirk; his cool grey eyes shone, alight with amusement.

"What are you smirking at?" she spat, harsher than intended but accurately reflecting how much he'd been annoying her recently.

He raised an eyebrow inquisitively, and drawled, "I'm sure you'd be smirking at me if my stomach had growled like that. You must be hungry, Granger."

Hermione flushed with embarrassment. "I lost track of time, not that it's any of your business, so I missed dinner."

Without waiting for a response, she hoisted her bag onto her shoulder and made to stride out of the library. Annoyingly, he followed closely behind her through into the stone-walled corridor, his infuriating smirk still dancing on his face. Her irritation only mounted when he followed silently while obviously wanting to say something else to aggravate her.

"Why are you following me?" she asked haughtily, aiming the question over her shoulder to where he walked a few paces behind her.

"Who said I was following you, Granger? Curfew's not for another hour, I'm going for a walk," he replied lightly, sickly innocence dripping from his voice.

"Get lost, Malfoy," she returned in the same light tone of voice, and was relieved when he did not follow her once she rounded another corner on the way to Gryffindor Tower.

Once upon a time, Hermione enjoyed the company she kept while sitting in the Gryffindor common room, and she still loved the place as if it was her only home. But since returning to Hogwarts to continue her N.E.W.T.s, she had started to find the common room a very lonely place indeed. Although she'd not expected to find friends as close to her as Harry and Ron had been, she never really expected to be this alone. More often than not after climbing through the portrait hole, she strode directly through the crowded common room and headed straight up to the girls' dormitory. This Saturday night was no different, and it was with a sigh that she drew the scarlet curtains on her four-poster bed and lay in bed with her old copy of Magical Hieroglyphs and Logograms, wondering wistfully what Harry and Ron were doing now.

Dear Ron,

I hope you, Harry and all your family are well, and you are both enjoying your jobs at the Ministry. Is it exciting, being an Auror? I know it's been Harry's ambition for years, but how are you finding it?

Things are very quiet here, not surprising considering Slytherin lost a lot of its members – and potential ones – after You-Know-Who died. I don't see Ginny around very much; I expect she's very busy with Quidditch practice and her N.E.W.T.s, the latter of which are keeping me very busy as well. I bet you and Harry are both happy that the Ministry accepted you without having to sit them! I know they offered me a position too, but I just couldn't pass up the chance Professor McGonagall offered me to finish my education, and it's wonderful being back at Hogwarts, even if it is very different now.

They're still trying to repair the Astronomy Tower after the battle; it looks like they'll be finished soon but it means that quite a few students, including me, aren't able do that subject yet. Not that you two would mind, I know how much you both hated it! I don't know if they managed to figure out what the Death Eaters hit it with, but it looks like they're getting somewhere, finally. According to Professor Vector, it might be finished by the end of the month if all goes well, so hopefully that will be the case.

At this stage of her letter, Hermione paused in her writing, her quill poised above the parchment. She realised the letter wasn't the most personal she'd ever written, but the extreme distance meant that a relationship between herself and Ron would be difficult. Surprisingly, it was Ron who suggested this and yet still acted as though Hermione had been the one who shunned him. As a result, their friendship had suffered greatly, with Ron acting like a petulant child denied a toy, and Hermione feeling stung that she was the one being wrongfully blamed.

Putting quill back to parchment, she continued,

I didn't realise Draco Malfoy would be returning to complete his N.E.W.T.s this year, and I can't say seeing his face was a pleasant surprise. At least he's calmed down since May, what with everything that happened. When I first saw him during Defence Against the Dark Arts he seemed like his head had deflated quite significantly. Not that I'm complaining, of course. The new DADA teacher's very good by the way; I'd say he's the best we've had since our third year, but he's not as good as Harry teaching our DA meetings, obviously. His name's Professor Canus, although I don't see how you two would have heard of him since you don't read outside of lessons and homework. I still recommend his book, A Study of Dwellings of 18th Century Vampires, even though I know neither of you will read it, because it's very interesting reading.

Again, I hope all is well with you, Harry and all your family, and I miss you all dearly.

All my love,

Hermione

Looking up from her letter, Hermione sighed. It was a cold, grey Sunday morning and the common room was uncharacteristically empty. It was likely that Ginny, as newly appointed Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, had called for an early practice session and all the fans from the House had flocked duly down to the Quidditch pitch to see how their team seemed to be faring before the first match of the season.

Although thankful for the peace and quiet in the common room, Hermione thought it best to send her letter now rather than wait and risk forgetting. She rolled the parchment up and slipped it into her jeans pocket before making her way through the portrait hole.

On her way to the Owlery, she managed to hear the din of noise from the Great Hall as breakfast was still clearly underway. Even though she missed dinner the night before, she found with surprise that she wasn't hungry this morning. She continued on, resolving that there was no point in having breakfast if you weren't hungry enough to eat it, which meant she could get in an early start in the library and complete a lengthy essay on the sources, properties and uses of aconite for Professor Slughorn.

Ron's reply reached Hermione on Thursday night, catching her reading in the girls' dormitory after a surprisingly enjoyable afternoon of Charms. At first, she thought it was an unusually quick reply considering it was Ron, but when Hermione unfurled the parchment, she understood why:

Dear Hermione,

It's not bad, being an Auror. Harry's enjoying it a bit more but I can't complain. Can't really say too much about it, to be honest. I do miss Hogwarts, but it's great knowing I have a job without needing more exams. I don't know why you're complaining about no Astronomy, it was almost as bad as Divination.

I didn't know Malfoy was going back either, but it's odd that you're not complaining about his face all of a sudden. I doubt I'd have time to read that book now I work at the Ministry, but it's good that you're enjoying it.

We're all fine here, still weird without Fred but we're coping. Hope you're okay too.

Ron

While Ron had never quite had a way with words, Hermione still found herself recoiling from the coldness of his letter; he had rarely been this short with her, and she knew it was because their friendship was strained. Which, she thought bitterly, was not her fault in the slightest.

She rolled the parchment back up into a scroll and shoved it harshly into her bedside cabinet, silently fuming at Ron's childishness.

A/N: I know it's slow at first, but it's necessary to get the ball moving for now. I hope you enjoyed it, please review as it makes me smile :)

WD,
xo.