TITLE: Her Lover's Gone
AUTHOR: Laura
SPOILERS: The Storm Parts 1 and 2
ARCHIVE: Please do, but drop me a line so I can check out your site!
FEEDBACK: A writers life-line. Please e-mail me and tell me what you think. lilangelstarz@hotmail.com
SUMMARY: Carols feelings after Dougs departure. Carols POV.
AUTHORS NOTES: The song used in this very short fic is 'My Lovers Gone', by Dido. Visit their site @
****************
My lover's gone
his boots no longer by my door
he left at dawn
and as I slept I felt him go
The nights since he left had grown increasingly long, and the days were almost unbearable without him. No matter where she was or what she was doing, the memory of him haunted her. Taunted her. Reminders of the life they shared before he left selfishly tugged at her dreams, not even leaving slumber as an escape from the pain and rejection. But he hadn't rejected her, had he? He begged her to come; pleaded with her. Her pride had affected her decision to stay in Chicago, instead of following him to Seattle. Her pride had told her that he would never leave. But he did, and she was left with nothing but a shattered heart and painful memories. During the long, lonely nights her whole body ached for him – her hands ached to touch him, her mouth to kiss him and her heart to love him.
Returns no more
I will not watch the ocean
My lover's gone
no earthly ships will ever bring him home again
bring him home again
People at work looked on with sympathy and pity. Probably thinking that she was going to breakdown at any moment. She would not let them see though. Work was an escape, where she could envision herself as someone else – anyone else – and pretend that nothing had happened. He was still there, working on another case, and she would see him that night. She never took breaks – the time to think and reflect was too painful for her to bear. She unconsciously dreaded the completion of the workday and going home where she was forced into to reality. Every night the tears would flow; memories would flood back to her and she could not pretend anymore. He wasn't there, he wasn't coming back and there wasn't a thing she could do about it.
My lover's gone
I know that kiss will be my last
no more his song
the tune upon his lips has passed
Their last kiss was etched in her memory. Her back pressed up against the hospital wall, she begged him to stay. Not to leave her. I have to go, was all he could say, and she could not convince him otherwise. He had started to walk off but she could not let him go. She had to say something, anything, just to delay the inevitable. "I don't want to wake up tomorrow alone" was the first thing that came to mind, she yelled it, in the hopes he would turn around. He did. He took her face in his hands and kissed her. She clung to him for dear life, praying to the highest being that he would never let her go and this kiss would never end. She put her heart and soul into it, hoping that it would change his mind. But the kiss did end; it didn't change his mind and she felt him – her life, her love, her lifeline – slipping from her grasp. He walked off, leaving her there crying against the hospital wall without so much as a look back or another word. Her heart shattered into thousands of little pieces in that moment, and she felt empty. His life had moved to Seattle, and she wasn't a part of it.
I sing alone
while I watch the ocean
My lover's gone
no earthly ships will ever bring him home again
bring him home again