I'm currently in the middle of writing a multi-chap fic, but this idea just WOULD NOT GO AWAY until I wrote it, so that's pretty much how this happened. Semi-song fic drabble to the song Kindle My Heart from the movie A Little Princess (1995 version, natch) written by Patrick Doyle. I got in the mood to listen to the music and somehow, this little idea came to mind. I highly recommend giving the A Little Princess soundtrack a listen if you haven't, it's really beautiful and a very interesting blend of genres.
Anyway, a disclaimer's in order: I don't own Leviathan.
As the moon kindles the night
As the wind kindles the fire
As the rain fills every ocean
And the Sun the Earth
So your heart will kindle my heart
Deryn liked Istanbul best in the mornings, the early mornings, when the light of dawn was just peaking up over the tops of the beautifully curved buildings. The sky would still be mostly dark, but sometimes the wind seemed to promise day approaching. Other times the tentative sun would sketch it's pinks across the edges of the eastern skyline, scratching out bit by bit the coming day.
The horizon made her think of Nene's proclamation that the world rested on the back of a turtle, which rested on the back of an elephant on the back of another elephant etc, etc to the end of infinity.
Da had always said that the pink streaks of light stretching into the night were God's hands wiping the night away, like a smudge on a window.
What would he think if he could see her now? A girl in boys clothing marooned in Clanker territory all for some stupid barking prince?
More than missing him, she wished she could ask him for advice now more than ever. He didn't always have the best answers or even any answers at all. But talking to him had always made her feel better regardless, as though somehow in his quiet understanding, he'd alleviated some of her worries. Sometimes even sitting with him seemed to do the trick, which had always been half the fun of ballooning, the quiet of the early morning with nothing and no one but her Da and the sky.
No one was ever awake in the early mornings in Istanbul either. Deryn supposed that was why she liked it in the mornings here. No machines running, no gears, even the streets were empty, void of clanking and the continuous blink of shining metal moving about everywhere. Somehow, that one small similarity between Clanker and Darwinist countries came as a small comfort to her.
Whenever someone else walked past the balcony she frequented in the early mornings, which was rare, Deryn would pretend to be practicing her signals, often in the company of Bovril, who would sometimes repeat the letters as Deryn said them to herself under her breath. But most mornings she preferred to peer out over the balcony, her arms folded resting on the ledge and her chin resting on her folded arms.
When the city was still like this, she liked it. She liked the air like this too. Still. Hot. Spicy almost. It had a sort of taste to it, a taste that, as with so many other things she had tasted in Istanbul, Deryn couldn't quite place or figure out, but found she enjoyed anyway.
Some mornings, like this one, Deryn would practice her signals anyway, regardless of whether she thought anyone was watching. The constant ache of having so many worries and fears, so many barking emotions running through her all the time made her jittery and the rhythmic flow of movements sometimes soothed her.
She bent her body forward, "A, B, C..."
I'd have to run a mile. That barking quote continued to bombard her thoughts. For heaven's sakes, she's common. The two comments chased each other around in her mind like a pair of angry dogs itching for a fight.
But still. She couldn't help but wonder, what would it be like if he didn't have to run? What would it be like to be free of so much worry for both their sakes?
"L, M, N, O, P..." What would it be like for them to be together, just the two of them?
"Q, R, S..." What would it be like to hold his hand?
"T, U, V..." Touch his cheek?
"W, X, Y, Z." Kiss him?
She shouldn't let herself think that. It was never going to happen and that was that. For starters she'd have to tell him, which she was obviously not brave enough to do and second there was that damn archduke business.
She flung herself back on to the edge of the balcony, arms flopping on the rail, face burrying into her hands. Somehow the spicy air of Istanbul made her feel hollow this morning. It was hopeless. And she couldn't get herself to stop thinking about the hopeless things. Double hopeless.
She may as well accept it now. After all of this, she was never going to see him again.
And that made her feel hollowest of all.
"A, B, C..." Bovril repeated quietly.
Deryn liked the early mornings too, because no one was awake to see her cry.
Take my heart
Take my heart
Kindle it with your heart
And my heart cannot be
Kindled without you
Your heart will kindle my heart
Reviews are greatly appreciated.